Saboteurs

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Replies

  • ladytiburona
    ladytiburona Posts: 17 Member
    I have friends at work who try to be really supportive. Many of them, still eat out every week or the job provides breakfasts or lunches. I eat in moderation now so it's all ok.

    I also started telling myself I was allergic (specifically to candy, chocolate, doughnuts, etc). It's working. I don't crave the sweets like I used to.

    My husband thought I was going through another diet phase when I came back to mfp Sept 30th 2013. He wasn't supportive. The only sabotage he may have engaged in was watching Diners, Drive Ins, and Dives over and over again during my first two weeks back.

    Since then, he's started cooking with me from scratch. He's also started watching his sodium levels a bit more and gives more input on meals and shopping. It took a little while for him to come around.

    Since September, I've lost 23 lbs so I'm not giving up.

    Good luck with your parents. :)
  • Kadi82
    Kadi82 Posts: 361 Member
    sabotage.gif

    First thing that came into my head haha
  • hstoblish
    hstoblish Posts: 234 Member
    I just wanted to add that saying that your parents are like your roommates makes me think of a conversation I overheard at a party in college.

    "How was your Christmas?"
    "It was awesome. My roommates bought me a car!"
    "Dude. They're your parents. Your parents bought you a car."
    "Yeah, I guess."

    It's great that your splitting rent, but from the perspective of an outsider, you're both complaining about the food your mom (presumably) is cooking for you, and talking about how they're just like roommates. Now I don't know you, and for all I know this is far from being an accurate portrayal of your situation, but it doesn't come across very well, you know?
  • RonnieLodge
    RonnieLodge Posts: 665 Member
    Does anyone else have saboteurs around them? Seriously. This is getting rough. At this time, I am living with my parents while I am going back to school full time, and the food that gets brought in here is unbelievably tough. I have talked to them, but it isn't helping. Any advice?

    Feel free to add me please. I can always use the motivation. Still 60lbs to go.
    :happy:

    Having also lived with my parents as an adult, I can tell you the choices are:

    1. Get involved in the family grocery shopping and more importantly, the preparation/cooking.
    If you are helping organize the pantry, sourcing recipes, writing the shopping list, going out and doing the shopping and whipping up meals, then you can lead by example and ALL eat better; or

    2) MOVE OUT.

    My mother actually would bring junk food (cakes, pastries, chocolates, sweets) EVERY time she visited my house after I moved out until I told her I throw stuff like that in the bin because I don't want it in my house.
  • RonnieLodge
    RonnieLodge Posts: 665 Member

    I pay rent as a roommate and all of my own bills. I don't mooch or live off of them financially. We agreed to have me here as a third of the rent as three roommates would. I am simply asking how to you all avoid the temptations when others bring the bad crap in. Maybe "sabotage" was a wrong word.

    Well that makes it easy - treat their food like roommate's food. You wouldn't eat your roommates food, right?
  • 970Mikaela1
    970Mikaela1 Posts: 2,013 Member
    I have one on my friend's list.

    only 1?
  • jeromybilbo7
    jeromybilbo7 Posts: 22
    Well, I didn't ask anyone what they thought about me living with my parents. I did say that I do pay rent, I am not a moocher, and this is while I am going back to school. That's not what this thread is about. I asked if anyone had anyone who buys stuff that is hard to resist. I asked advice about resisting that. I was not attacking or complaining about my parents. It is about resisting food that others bring in. That's it.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    Well, I didn't ask anyone what they thought about me living with my parents. I did say that I do pay rent, I am not a moocher, and this is while I am going back to school. That's not what this thread is about. I asked if anyone had anyone who buys stuff that is hard to resist. I asked advice about resisting that. I was not attacking or complaining about my parents. It is about resisting food that others bring in. That's it.

    well that's easy. you didnt buy it so dont eat it. eating any roommate's food you didnt buy is basically being a jerk, so basically just dont be a jerk :smile:
  • SerenaKitty
    SerenaKitty Posts: 142
    Well, I didn't ask anyone what they thought about me living with my parents. I did say that I do pay rent, I am not a moocher, and this is while I am going back to school. That's not what this thread is about. I asked if anyone had anyone who buys stuff that is hard to resist. I asked advice about resisting that. I was not attacking or complaining about my parents. It is about resisting food that others bring in. That's it.

    It is nearly impossible not to caught in the crossfire of p*ssing matches here. I suggest a raincoat.

    I live with my parents. Most nights, I cook dinner. Also, like someone else mentioned, it wouldn't hurt to offer to do the grocery shopping. I've also found that being up front helps a lot! Tell them what you're struggling with - they might want to help you out. Cooking your own meals, buying your own food, and being open with your parents will get you a long way.
  • CrusaderSam
    CrusaderSam Posts: 180 Member
    Well, I didn't ask anyone what they thought about me living with my parents. I did say that I do pay rent, I am not a moocher, and this is while I am going back to school. That's not what this thread is about. I asked if anyone had anyone who buys stuff that is hard to resist. I asked advice about resisting that. I was not attacking or complaining about my parents. It is about resisting food that others bring in. That's it.

    well that's easy. you didnt buy it so dont eat it. eating any roommate's food you didnt buy is basically being a jerk, so basically just dont be a jerk :smile:

    Yeah that is like saying to some who has a broken arm "you ever try not having a broken arm". Sometimes you have to be a jerk and put your own health before other peoples snacks. People don't like how you live, or what you do, well to bad for them.
  • 5MommaJ
    5MommaJ Posts: 35 Member
    I understand how tough it is to have saboteurs around. My husband is a saboteur. Sometimes circumstance takes us away from home at mealtime.... to the buffet (Chinese or pizza) we go. Or Friday night fried food at home. Saboteur! He thinks he is being nice to me and I am being accommodating to him but the more I call him a saboteur and the longer I stick with making good choices and exercising the easier it is getting for both of us to change our habits. That is my suggestion for you.. get a plan and stick with it gradually your parents will come to understand your plan. Doesn't mean they will change their old habits die hard as well but even if some of the food changes it will be a help. If your mom or dad does the food shopping I would put in some request for food that you can eat. Also you might look up new recipes for your mom to try. Eatingwell.com is a sight I really like. If you have time you could even cook meals with your mom and experiment with ways to cut out fat. for example replace oil with applesauce in baking or switch deep frying (oh the pain of it) with oven roasting.
    Good luck to you.
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
    sabotage.gif
    Woot! I was hoping that somebody else likes the Beasties!!
    thanks

    Greatest music video ever.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    Any advice?

    Yeah - start taking ownership for your own decisions.

    Calling people "saboteurs" when all they are really doing is not going out of their way to make life easy for you is a pretty self-centred way of looking at the world.
  • 5MommaJ
    5MommaJ Posts: 35 Member
    I understand how tough it is to have saboteurs around. My husband is a saboteur. Sometimes circumstance takes us away from home at mealtime.... to the buffet (Chinese or pizza) we go. Or Friday night fried food at home. Saboteur! He thinks he is being nice to me and I am being accommodating to him but the more I call him a saboteur and the longer I stick with making good choices and exercising the easier it is getting for both of us to change our habits. That is my suggestion for you.. get a plan and stick with it gradually your parents will come to understand your plan. Doesn't mean they will change their old habits die hard as well but even if some of the food changes it will be a help. If your mom or dad does the food shopping I would put in some request for food that you can eat. Also you might look up new recipes for your mom to try. Eatingwell.com is a sight I really like. If you have time you could even cook meals with your mom and experiment with ways to cut out fat. for example replace oil with applesauce in baking or switch deep frying (oh the pain of it) with oven roasting.
    Good luck to you.
  • will2lose72
    will2lose72 Posts: 128 Member
    Were you an overweight kid living in the same house and now you are the one making a change? I fight this battle every time I go home to visit and honestly haven't won yet...it's tough! Remember why you started your journey. Supplement the food that's available in the house with quick snacks that you can grab and go. Don't look the in pantry if you don't have to. Put your healthy alternatives in a different location so you don't see what other choices might be available. If the environment is one where parents are going to cook and expect you to eat, then it might be better to develop a crazier schedule that has you eating else where (if you can make good choices eating out) or one that has you eating at hours that are off your parents normal schedule so you can cook for yourself. Good luck, let us know what works out for you!
  • NotorDJP
    NotorDJP Posts: 6
    I prefer the phrase, "Food Pusher".

    I'm not going to pile on with any other things about your living situation.

    My Dad is a Food Pusher. I can walk away but my husband can't. When we visit, he is always offering us stuff. He is being nice and he is elderly, so we cut him some slack. I've even told him not to offer my husband things, but he forgets and does it anyway, then complains that my husband's belly is too big.

    So I feel your pain. But many have made good suggstions. Buy your own stuff, cook your own stuff or just watch portions.

    Portion control is probably a problem with you, or you wouldn't be overweight to begin with. So I suggest you have a food escape on hand to eat when one of your trigger foods is there.
  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,659 Member
    you are 38, living with your parents and THEY are the saboteurs ?????

    grow up & get your own place .....

    :noway:
  • Gidzmo
    Gidzmo Posts: 905 Member
    Does anyone else have saboteurs around them? Seriously. This is getting rough. At this time, I am living with my parents while I am going back to school full time, and the food that gets brought in here is unbelievably tough. I have talked to them, but it isn't helping. Any advice? Feel free to add me please. I can always use the motivation. Still 60lbs to go.
    :happy:

    Two people (me and a relative) trying to lose. So third family member asks for chips and such (and he's the last one who should be asking, because he's a diabetic).

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