For all women who are striving for "

Options
13

Replies

  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
    Options
    There's no denying that obesity is an epidemic in this country, and not doing anything to change that isn't helping us as a society. It's driving up healthcare costs and dragging us down, as a whole. It starts with personal responsibility, educating yourself, and making better choices.

    That said, I also see countless posts on this site by folks, both men and women, who lose 100 lbs, achieve healthy BMI's, yet still aren't happy. I think this segment is whom this video is aimed at.
  • ferniejoy
    ferniejoy Posts: 61 Member
    Options
    Stop ranting and watch the video. It is a problem for all society.
  • ginajie637
    ginajie637 Posts: 2
    Options
    Plus,.. real men like curves and real boobs. Not digitally enhanced ones.. :~)

    I really wish women would stop speaking for us.

    “Gentlemen, we are going to relentlessly chase perfection, knowing full well we will not catch it, because nothing is perfect. But we are going to relentlessly chase it, because in the process we will catch excellence. I am not remotely interested in just being good.” ~ Vince Lombardi

    And I wish people in general would quit with the idea that women live for men. I don't really care what men prefer, my body belongs to me and I'll shape it to whatever makes me happy.
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
    Options
    Ideally health and nutrition is what should be taught to our kids, but that's not what sells. Beauty sells. Creating ideals of perfection is what makes women buy make-up, whether it's to please ourselves, men or society. Being beautiful is separate from being skinny. The point is beauty and perfect is a concept created by the media. Something to strive for that we can't possibly obtain. Afterall if we obtain it, we no longer need to buy the new products they shove in front of our face right? Undeniably obesity is a problem, but it's not the point of this thread or the video. Loving yourself. Being taught you are beautiful leads to healthier kids,healthier teens and in theory less teens who are anorexic or bulimic. Being under weight is no better then being over weight. It's a marketing strategy and it's damaging us.

    As the other poster pointed out, even Dove, who seems to embrace women off all shapes and sizes, still present their models as flawless despite carrying some extra pounds.Unrealistic. While they seem to saying women of all sizes are beautiful they still present women who are flawless. I have bumps and bruises and scars because I have lived, so does everyone.

    And why do we need plus sizes? Psychologically that is damaging. Especially to young impressionable girls. (and I lived int eh plus sizes for a long long time). We don't need the label, we can just be a size 18 and not refer to it as a plus size 18.

    The segment is aimed at all women esp those who suffer an ED because they are attempting to achieve "perfection" The size of the women or weight gain or loss is inconsequential to the issue. Healthy women, with healthy BMIs will still find imperfections because we do not have so and so legs or stomach or butt or chest. And that's what is being sold to us every time we look at an ad or turn on the TV.
  • albayin
    albayin Posts: 2,524 Member
    Options
    the best curves are made of muscle. I will continue to strive to be my best regardless of what anyone else thinks.

    ^^ this. I want to keep going because I want to see it myself...
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
    Options
    Plus,.. real men like curves and real boobs. Not digitally enhanced ones.. :~)

    Nope. "Real" men like whatever the hell it is we like. What you enjoy sexually has nothing to do with "realness".
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
    Options
    There is actually an increase in men and boys presenting at eating disorder clinics (at least here in Aus). I would say there is just as much objectification of men as women and I would agree that men dont have the 'right' to bring it up. Men have to have 'big shoulders' and 'man up' about these things

    My husband is a slender man, he weighs only 50kg and is ghostly pale like me. He is VERY self conscious, probably more so then his obese wife because I have parts of the media and my gf's telling me I'm a beautiful person and how good i look ect. Men don't have that privilege, men will pick on each other mercilessly in the guise of a joke. My husband wont take his t-shirt off at the beach because he is so self conscious of his body.

    I think I get what the men here are trying to say. We can't JUST look at women's issues we have to look at SOCIETIES issues. and society has a messed up image of who we should be. I should be petite and my husband should be bulky. Neither of us fit this stereotype but I believe I have more support to change myself then my husband does. and yes these issues come froma history of patriarchy but that patriarchy is damaging men as much as women.

    God bless you for your compassion and understanding. Yes, men do suffer, and FAR greater than most women realize. Just look at this thread as woman after woman danes to speak with authority on what men feel about women, and themselves.

    They don't have a clue. The major difference between men and women on this topic is that women, in most western societies at least, are thankfully "allowed" to express concern about these matters, have a voice, and seek help if need be. Men and boys are expected to shoulder eating disorders, body dysmorphia, body shame, etc, in silence. Most don't feel comfortable expressing their issues with other males, and most women are utterly clueless about the suffering. And to top it off, in a bid to empower "real" women with "curves", and makes themselves feel better, we have all these women declaring what "real" men are attracted to and want in bed. Give me a break. That's the equivalent of the guys who think all "real" women like hulking muscles, which likewise is a bunch of bull.
  • YorriaRaine
    YorriaRaine Posts: 370 Member
    Options
    Each person has their own things they are attracted to, you cannot generalize an entire sex's preference. The stress to reach perfection reaches both sexes.

    When it comes to self image, in my own opinion, there are only two things you need to worry about. Your health and your heart.

    No amount of beauty can disguise an ugly heart.
  • Greyeer
    Greyeer Posts: 7 Member
    Options
    You may have amended your comment from "real men like..." to "men like..." but you haven't amended your attitude. I don't think any of the men are being overly sensitive, I think they have a right to say "well hang on, I don't want some lady stranger telling me what I like". Lumping all men into your experience of menfolk isn't really fair is it?

    I'm sure some men do prefer big balloon boobies and bum injections, but that's their business and doesn't effect how I perceive myself in any way. Perhaps we, as in the current generation, should stop fretting about ourselves and how we are perceived and start thinking about how we are influencing those who come after us. Some social inheritance we are leaving eh?
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
    Options
    Watch the video.. otherwise don't comment. Thanks :) It's a comment about the video.

    I never said there wasn't an issue facing men as well. I only saw an awesome video and wanted to share it.

    I don't like fake anything on a man. Sure.. Shemar Moore's pictures are nice to look at, but i'm not fooled into thinking that is really does look that perfect. (but cant' say that was true when I was younger) It's more attractive when I see a person who has bumps and scars and imperfection, because they are real.

    I just wanted to show the women out there, striving for perfection, that there is no perfection. The images of perfection we see are digitally created. Not only that, but a lot of women starve themselves to reach whatever magic number or look that they think men will like better. Maybe *you* don't. But a lot of them do. Especially the younger generation. yes it's mental, but it's learned by what we see on TV and in magazines and by what our brothers look at in catalogs (nevermind the look they are actually attracted to might be completely different)

    Images of beauty are pushed on women and associates with everything from cars to fun nights out to dates to whatever. Even the Nike commercials where the woman is running and sweating, she still has perfect skin! (not me.. i'm red as hell when I run). it gives us the subconscious message that you have to be beautiful and perfect in order to be worthy of all this fun. A lot of young ladies are not able to overcome this. And as some point all women have felt that pressure. A lot of us cave.

    Food for thought...
    Do you wear make-up? Fooled yourself into thinking you are wearing it for you because you like it? It makes you feel good. Why is that? Why did you start wearing it then? I don't know many 4 year old who won't go out without mascara, unless they are trying to look like mommy that day. Sure.. maybe you'll go to the gym without it now or to the mailbox, but what about date night?? Maybe you have overcome it? Maybe you are now comfortable enough in your own skin to go out sans make up on date night. But what about 10 years ago?
  • victoria090
    victoria090 Posts: 82 Member
    Options
    Plus,.. real men like curves and real boobs. Not digitally enhanced ones.. :~)

    I really wish women would stop speaking for us.

    “Gentlemen, we are going to relentlessly chase perfection, knowing full well we will not catch it, because nothing is perfect. But we are going to relentlessly chase it, because in the process we will catch excellence. I am not remotely interested in just being good.” ~ Vince Lombardi

    haha men like whatever the heck they like...just as females like whatever the heck they want to. To each their own, right? I have found my self attracted to big guys & smaller guys
  • somefitsomefat
    somefitsomefat Posts: 445 Member
    Options
    I like my women like I like my coffee. I don't like coffee.
  • Muddy_Yogi
    Muddy_Yogi Posts: 1,459 Member
    Options
    Perfection. Please watch this video. Please eat and love yourself for who you are and what you look like. We are all beautiful and unique and we need to stop striving for something that isn't obtainable in real life.

    http://www.upworthy.com/5-minutes-of-what-the-media-actually-does-to-women-8?c=ufb3

    Plus,.. real men like curves and real boobs. Not digitally enhanced ones.. :~)

    I know you meant this in a good way but the whole real men like curves and real boobs thing bothers me. One you shouldn't be basing what you want to look like because of what "real men" like. Two Not cool to just generalize men like that. And lastly what about the skinny chicks without any boobs are we not desirable?

    Agreed. And also I would like to add...I am not doing this because some man likes a certain thing! This is for me...my health and my own vision of what I want to be!
  • Muddy_Yogi
    Muddy_Yogi Posts: 1,459 Member
    Options


    Food for thought...
    Do you wear make-up? Fooled yourself into thinking you are wearing it for you because you like it? It makes you feel good. Why is that? Why did you start wearing it then? I don't know many 4 year old who won't go out without mascara, unless they are trying to look like mommy that day. Sure.. maybe you'll go to the gym without it now or to the mailbox, but what about date night?? Maybe you have overcome it? Maybe you are now comfortable enough in your own skin to go out sans make up on date night. But what about 10 years ago?

    I wear my make up because I don't want to look tired....And no I have not FOOLED myself into thinking it is for me. I KNOW my husband doesn't care. I care. I want to be the best version of me.
  • Confuzzled4ever
    Confuzzled4ever Posts: 2,860 Member
    Options


    Food for thought...
    Do you wear make-up? Fooled yourself into thinking you are wearing it for you because you like it? It makes you feel good. Why is that? Why did you start wearing it then? I don't know many 4 year old who won't go out without mascara, unless they are trying to look like mommy that day. Sure.. maybe you'll go to the gym without it now or to the mailbox, but what about date night?? Maybe you have overcome it? Maybe you are now comfortable enough in your own skin to go out sans make up on date night. But what about 10 years ago?

    I wear my make up because I don't want to look tired....And no I have not FOOLED myself into thinking it is for me. I KNOW my husband doesn't care. I care. I want to be the best version of me.

    But why? Why is looking tired.. which is a normal way for humans to look, a bad thing? Why do we need to cover it with make up. Who told us or taught us that? Because you weren't 9 or 12 or 15 insisting on make-up because you don't want to look tired in public. (whatever age you either were able to get it yourself or your parents caved.. I was almost 16)

    I'm not trying to pick on anyone. It's nothing personal. But there is more truth here then any of us want to admit. I'm not going to say I'm not guilty of this. And I do walk around saying i wear it for me so I don't look *whatever*. But that thought process comes from somewhere and often times its media telling me I need to look a certain way, irregardless of what guys have said. Yes. I've overcome most of it. I will and have gone out without make-up on date night. But I'm still not 100% comfortable with it and a lot of us aren't. And a lot more wouldn't dream of it. (i had a co-worker at one of my previous jobs who had been married for 40 years and woke up every single morning an hour before her husband to put on her make-up, so he wouldn't see her without it, that is sad in my opinion)
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    Options
    Plus,.. real men like curves and real boobs.

    This is body shaming. It's just as demoralizing as people who cut down larger women. This nonsense has to stop.

    Yes, that statement is body shaming. I don't care what "real men" like anyway, or what other people see as an acceptable body image. I live in my body, and I love myself, therefore I say what is and is not acceptable for me.

    Besides, there is nothing that makes a man "real," except honesty about who he is as a human being.

    As for the video- it's excellent. The media goes to town on selling thin beautiful bodies that really are not all that thin and beautiful. It's like creating mannequins and trying to convince the world they are real.
  • Pirate_chick
    Pirate_chick Posts: 1,216 Member
    Options
    Ya'll are mean. :yawn:
  • SLLRunner
    SLLRunner Posts: 12,942 Member
    Options
    Ya'll are mean. :yawn:
    Why do you say this?
  • Phaedra2014
    Phaedra2014 Posts: 1,254 Member
    Options
    Plus,.. real men like curves and real boobs. Not digitally enhanced ones.. :~)

    I really wish women would stop speaking for us.

    “Gentlemen, we are going to relentlessly chase perfection, knowing full well we will not catch it, because nothing is perfect. But we are going to relentlessly chase it, because in the process we will catch excellence. I am not remotely interested in just being good.” ~ Vince Lombardi

    LOL! So true! Why do some women speak for men like they know everything yet, if a man dares to generalize about a woman....!!!
  • Phaedra2014
    Phaedra2014 Posts: 1,254 Member
    Options
    Perfection. Please watch this video. Please eat and love yourself for who you are and what you look like. We are all beautiful and unique and we need to stop striving for something that isn't obtainable in real life.

    http://www.upworthy.com/5-minutes-of-what-the-media-actually-does-to-women-8?c=ufb3

    Plus,.. real men like curves and real boobs. Not digitally enhanced ones.. :~)

    How do you know what all men like? And what is the difference between a man and a "real" man? I don't understand these generalizations.

    ETA: I think you mean well though:smile:

Categories