Bad news, but now I know why he has been acting the way he's

Kiaana

I always think you reap what you sow, so he'll reap his soon enough love :laugh:

on the plus side - without having to iron his shirts and clean his dirty underwear you have more time to focus on your relationship with yourself and your kids and lets be honest... that will probably be one hell of a lot more fulfilling! :flowerforyou:

GTOgirl1969

Thanks y'all, you are making this a little bit more bearable.

Life_is_Good

Did you cancel the ad on craigslist??:laugh: Sorry I just had too.

No, I just moved it to the "obituaries" section:laugh:

:laugh:

sindyb9

So sorry. I totally understand, 7 years ago mine did it and said it was only once. I did not believe that. We were going through really tough times and instead of talking we just delt on our own and started to drift apart. We have been together now 20 years, I may have forgiven him, but will never forget. I hope everythings works out for you. :flowerforyou: If you need to talk I am there for you.

mommared53

I'm so sorry to hear what happened. The Christian in me wants to say "vengeance is mine saith the Lord so let God deal with the cheater" but the woman in me wants to say "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Make the sucker pay!"

Anyway never feel bad for coming to your friends on MFP with your problems. That's what we're here for and we have your back whatever you decide to do. Good luck to you. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

msarro

So, um, does this mean I can ask to ride in your car now?

*hug*

Hope you're ok.

kaiyacali

I ran into my ex the other day.... then put it into reverse and ran him over again! (just a joke!)

My ex cheated on me with one of my friends. Let's just say, I left him, took everything, and two yrs later she left and took everything too. Now he's stuck w/ a huge morgage and three jobs.

Just leave everything to Karma. She's a b$#@h and will set everything right. :happy:

Shannon023

GTO,

Sooooo sorry to hear this!!! Get yourself a lawyer & run..no sprint to the bank & close out any joint accounts you may have.

I'll echo what everyone else has said, you'll be better off without him. You're making positive changes in your life and showing him the curb will be another one. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

{{hugs}}

kaiyacali

She has a good point! Remove your checking account and cancel credit cards. Also, freeze any assets that you two had. Hire a lawyer and serve him w/ papers. If you can't afford one, there are assistance lawyers out there that will work for little to nothing (but you have to be smart to use these guys).

BlackBeltLJ

Let's see... he weighs 200+ lbs? That means you "win" for the most weight lost this week!

You are a strong woman- keep your chin up and your eyes on the horizon.

GTOgirl1969

So, um, does this mean I can ask to ride in your car now?

*hug*

Hope you're ok.

Sure why not? ::does huge burnout::

GTOgirl1969

She has a good point! Remove your checking account and cancel credit cards. Also, freeze any assets that you two had. Hire a lawyer and serve him w/ papers. If you can't afford one, there are assistance lawyers out there that will work for little to nothing (but you have to be smart to use these guys).

Thank the Lord, I didn't have any joint accts. with him:bigsmile: his debt is ALL HIS!!!

abbychelle07

I am happy to report that as of today, I have lost 60 pounds since the divorce. A couple of weeks ago, I saw the woman that my ex was cheating with for years, and she looked like she picked up all of my 60 pounds and then some...justice...it's so sweet. :laugh:

I love that!

But seriously, what a shock! I would be crying my eyes out if I were you, but I don't think I would have in my heart to forgive. He doesn't even seem like he wants to be in the marriage, if the girl "accidentally" showed up at your door. Sounds like he wants YOU to break up with HIM because he is not even man enough to do that!!! Ahhhhh! How frustrating.

Keep your head up! Looking hot (and happy) is the best revenge.

kaiyacali

CHA! Hot and happy is the key. I'm getting remarried in 43 days to a fantastic man.

Just remember and believe in your hotness, girl. You are soooo much better then he will ever be.

Phatmomma

Maybe she really didn't know. it's not her fault or her problem really and truly. It's HIS. If she left that showed she had some respect. Plus she wouldn't risk getting a butt whippin' going to your house like that and the police would have been on the side of the homeowner...
No one can ruin someone else's marriage or make someone cheat. Sounds like your hubby is a douche. But ah well. Whatever your decision is I'm sure allyour mfpals will support you. You know your history and what you want to do and if he worth it or not. Of course you can do better Just be sure to schedule a complete std screening, if he did her he probably did others and you want to be fit and healthy and not have that to worry about on top of everything else.
And eat, don't let this jerk be the reason you punish yourself and your body. he's had to much power already running two women's lives and ruining them.

wagsgirls

i feel for you and i am here for you also:flowerforyou: good luck to you in whatever you choose, i am sure you will be able to handle it! i don't really want to say too much because i don't want to seem like i'm telling you to go one way or the other. if you decide to stay i agree with what someone else said you need to get to the root of it and lay down the law. if you kick him to the curb:drinker: then i think you and your girls will do just fine without him. sometimes i think that about me and my girls! but just remember you have all of us!

GTOgirl1969

Just be sure to schedule a complete std screening, if he did her he probably did others and you want to be fit and healthy and not have that to worry about on top of everything else.

Believe me, I am

beep

I'm so sorry. It will be a long road for you to get over the shock and to figure out what you're going to do. Probably everyone of us out here has been affected by this happening to ourselves or having it happen to a friend. I would try to find a support group locally as well as your friends here on cyberspace.

beep

My friend found out his debt was half hers, better check on that quickly.

GTOgirl1969

My friend found out his debt was half hers, better check on that quickly.

I didn't have my name on any of his credit cards, bank accts., bills, etc. He had that in place before I married him.

MFS27

My friend found out his debt was half hers, better check on that quickly.

I didn't have my name on any of his credit cards, bank accts., bills, etc. He had that in place before I married him.

It depends on where you live. Here in CA, any debt you have before married is yours alone. Any debt either of you accumulated durning the marriage (regardless of whose name is on the bill) is "community property" and both are responsible for. However if he acted in malice (intentionally charged up stuff on the CC, etc.) you can argue against being held responsible for that in court.

This is awful news - we all feel for you! *Sending big e-hugs*

jenbar

Let's see... he weighs 200+ lbs? That means you "win" for the most weight lost this week!

hahahaha! That is too funny!!!

GTO Biggest Loser 200 POUNDS IN ONE DAY!!!

HOLY CRAP! I can't even believe that was the reason for his assyness!

ali106

Sigh....what a load!

But you GTO..Girl! you are my new hero...."um get off my property before I call the police!" you are one cool chick!!!!
I'm soooo proud of you in front of your daughters...you taught them how to be a class act right then and there girl!

regardless if that thing knew it or not ....she's not even worth a waste of a minute of your time(except to prove adultery)....he knew and that's what you're dealing with now....just keep breathing even after the adrenaline is down and you may feel weaker....remember you are not!!! we'll be here for you hon! No matter what you choose!!

hugs and prayers your way!
Ali

GTOgirl1969

Thanks, your kind words and support mean a lot to me. I am honored to be a part of this group and I consider you all my friends:flowerforyou:

auntkaren

I just don't know who else to talk to...my family has already made it abundantly clear how they feel about him., so they just don't want to hear it:ohwell:
Guess it's time to load up the GTO and just drive, baby, drive....

Sorry GTO But think things out first. Don't let the bum off so easy. That was my mistake. Take him for all he is worth and more, especially for the children. If you don't he and his girlfriend will be living it up while you do without. Get your papers and money in order even if you don't let him know what is going on. Get some good advise. Want to talk I am here.

evjazz

Be strong, cherish your children and your own self. He's an a--hole and you know it. Now do the right thing....be well and keep us posted.

His_Kelly

As my grandma would have said: Screw me once, same on you. Screw me twice, shame on me!

Get out of there sweetie... you don't need that kind of BS in your life. You deserve someone who will treat you like you should be treated... someone who will appreciate you and who would never even think of doing such rotten things.

Chin up though. Things will get better. And we are all here for you.

:flowerforyou: Kelly

watch48win

She has a good point! Remove your checking account and cancel credit cards. Also, freeze any assets that you two had. Hire a lawyer and serve him w/ papers. If you can't afford one, there are assistance lawyers out there that will work for little to nothing (but you have to be smart to use these guys).

Thank the Lord, I didn't have any joint accts. with him:bigsmile: his debt is ALL HIS!!!

Smart girl!

dulceluva

damn. I am so sorry. I am speechless. I am sorry good people get caught in these stupid messes. :noway:

SoupNazi

OMGosh! Be strong GTO (like I need to tell you that!) As one tough chick to another, it's gonna sink in soon and hurt so very badly. I'm not one to cry and I don't think you are either....but you are going to need to after so much betrayal. Why in the h-e-double hockey stick did he ask you to dress more sexier for him a month or so ago????? To measure up to that skank? (I that word and use it daily...lol) I think NOT! Wow, just think, if you were a skank you could be just like her....aim high...lol.:laugh: You and your kids are in my thoughts and prayers and remember...I truly believe this...what goes around comes around. You have your kids and that's ALL that matters.
On the professional side, I investigate crime for a living, and would highly suggest you dig up as much info as you can. The computer is a good place to start. Look at all of the history and tmp files. Once you find incriminating ones, print them out and keep them safe. That will be your number 1 defense against him and will blow his case and false allegations out of the water. Once you can prove adultery, he won't have aleg to stand on. But you must do some digging and be your own investigator NOW before he can delete anything .If you need help with some investigating, I will be happy to help free of charge .
{{{{{HUGS TO YOU SWEETIE}}}}}}