Question is about my 7 year old daughter who weighs 80lbs

spikrgrl503

I was this girl too. I was big from 7-9 but then I shot up and grew 8 inches a year three years in a row. If you are tall and you already said your husband is tall, she might start to shoot up. I hit 6' at 11 years old, and thinned out as I grew. I was never "thin" because I ate voraciously too, but I could wear jeans that fit for sure!

I applaud you for trying to teach her healthy eating habits so young. I wish my family had done the same. It was hard because I have three younger brothers, all of whom are very tall and very skinny (6'3", 6'2" and 6'8" at 26, 19, and 19). When we are all home my parents could order four pizzas, one each for my three brothers and one for me and my parents to share. I had no idea about what portions, and I felt like I had to eat "my share" of the food because it was always gone if I ever went back for more the next day.

I think household rules are a great idea. I also love the idea of having a weekly snack allowance. I might start doing that for myself haha.

Pickle_Ninja

I was exactly the same way as your daughter OP! Tall for my age, always heavy with a big belly. It was the jeans story that really twigged for me. EXACTLY the same, couldn't wear jeans that fit both my belly and my legs. I was always the tallest in the class, every year and it was about age 7 that I started to grow out too.

I overate with food, and stopped moving. You could give me carrots and apple and celery and broccoli and I would chow down on them just as happily as biscuits (cookies) and chips and chocolate. It didn't really matter what I ate, I just wanted food.

I think a previous poster mentioned teaching your daughter to slow down and eat food for taste - so she'll learn 'fullness' or 'satiety' signals - is a good idea. And the water instead of food, in case she's dehydrated.

Other than that, keep consulting with your GP (family doctor). If you're not happy with how they're brushing your concerns off, consider getting a second (or third) opinion, if you feel there may be a hormonal or metabolic imbalance that isn't being recognised or even considered for testing.

Yup your experience is pretty much exactly the same as my daugther. Thanks for sharing.

Pirate_chick

The best thing to do is talk to her pediatrician.

castlerobber

Four feet tall is only average for a 7-year-old girl, but 80 pounds is definitely high.

arrseegee

I think you need to think about ways you can restrict her snacking without making it a big deal. Also ensuring that she is involved in some sort of regular physical activity will help

PinkyFett

Well honestly, if all she wants to do is eat, you're the parent. Tell her no, she does not need a snack right now. Offer her healthy things for meals and snacks. I know you can't do it all when she's in school and all, but try packing her lunch for her? My 4 year old is 50 lbs and very tall for her age--46 inches, eats like a bird. She's a junk food junkie too and if she had it her way, she'd eat cookies and ice cream 24/7, but I tell her no and she's been slowly coming around because she knows I won't give in. I totally get it's not easy. I just stopped getting any junk food in the house when we go shopping so it's not in sight. She only sees the fruits and veggies in the fridge. I also tried to get her some ranch dip for the veggies and she's been eating them with a little less hassle. Luckily my 3 year old eats anything I put in front of her, but my oldest is a trip.

blink1021

I had the same concerns with my son he is 10 and is 5'3" and weighs 130lbs. I thought he was too big and I noticed his belly was a little chunky. I try not to make a big deal out of it, but I pack his school lunches (the ones at school are not healthy I do not care what they say), and I monitor his portions at home and what he eats. My kids have to ask to have snacks they are not allowed to go into the refrigerator without permission I have always done this since they were little. He snacks on healthy items such as yogurt or apples and his favorite is celery and peanut butter so I didn't want to deter him from it. At his last appt I asked his pediatrician what he thought about his weight and I was told not to worry keep feeding him the way I have but keep him active so my son does a sport each season or some type of activity to keep him moving. I was told he is just a big boy he is not fat but its impt to limit junk. I monitor it without letting him know I am and he loves helping me grocery shop. Now his younger sister I don't think will ever gain any weight or grow she is the tiniest little thing.

sillybeth84

So I guess its more I want direction on where to look..I know this site if for adults and I am a member here not my 7 year old of course. So I don't know what to do. I am doing my best to show by example how to eat. And I do as much as I can control what she's eating. But for as long as she could talk and walk she will want to eat constantly. Anytime a different person in the house wants a snack she needs a snack too. (not everyone wants a snack at the same time, so as you can imagine she's trying to double up on snacks constantly) I try my best to control this..but at the same time I don't want to make it into a big deal as if she has a problem. Don't want her with issues.. I mean I was once called chubby (when I wasn't) as a kid and I swear is scarred me for life.

So what do I do? She's in school 5 days a week and I know she must bum food from other kids...I don't want to bring it up to her teacher etc cause its embarassing. And I don't want her to feel singled out.

Anyways she is tall she's about 4ft so fairly tall, and she's 80 lbs. 80! is that really bad? see I don't even know she's got a fair amount of rolls.

Seems like it should be a simple solution, control control control..but how do I do that without singling her out?

My son is 65 lbs. is 4ft 1 inch and is only five years old. I watch his weight. He is not in a danger zone yet but if he were 80 lbs. I would be packing his lunch. Then making sure the other two meals at home were healthy. If your daughter is eating healthy already speak to her doctor. If she isn't eating so healthy then she may have those genes were you CAN'T eat whatever you want. Best of luck!

MrsG31

Thanks everyone, I think its time for another trip to our family dr. And I will try some of the other suggestions, we are very active so not sure if I can up that too much more. I might just casually check with her teach and ask if she's noticed if my daughter gets foods from other classmates. And if she is, try to deal with that at home explaining why I don't want her eating others lunches (their moms worked hard and would like their own kids to eat what they made etc, ... skirting around the real reason lol) And I do like the allowing her to pick out certain snacks and thats all she gets, I will do this with my son too (even though he truely eats soley when he's hungry) but if she eats hers and he hasn't then at least when he does want it I will say sorry but you ate yours already and then it wont become a unfair thing. Thanks

Yes, I second (or is it third now?) that you should mention something to the teacher, in additon to talk to her doc of course. Maybe just ask what the lunch room policies are, such as is sharing food allowed and are there lunch room monitors? I remember when I did the orientation at the school we were told the teachers all share monitor responsibility on a rotating schedule. My daughter is in kindergarten and she actually told me they were not supposed to share food, and her teacher confirmed this. And I have spoken to her teacher about it because I was tired of seeing her come home with half her lunch not eaten- I asked that they keep an eye on her as she has the tendency to talk too much instead of eat. And once another mom brought in birthday cupcakes at lunch so my daughter ate that instead of her lunch. The teacher assured me that moms are only supposed to bring in treats in the afternoon, but she didn't want to turn away the woman or embarrass the child. But geez, it is someone's birthday just about every week and they get cupcakes a lot for afternoon snacks. The teacher said there are a few students that their mother's have asked that their child does not particpate in those, due to allergies or just a preference.

MrsG31

I also saw this neat thing on a blog one time where a lady set up a "snack system" in her house for her older kids. She had bought one of those plastic 3 drawer bins and filled it snacks, using ziploc bags to portion out stuff. On the top of the bin she had a bowl or basket of things like bananas, apples, pears, oranges, etc. In order to get the snacks, they had to "pay" for them. The stuff on top in the basket was free. I don't remember the whole system though - I know she used fake gold coins, but I can't remember how or if they earned them or if she gave them so many to start the week with. I am sure you could search the internet or Pinterest for something like this. I thought is was a neat idea to try when my 2 are older.

twixlepennie

Thanks everyone, I think its time for another trip to our family dr. And I will try some of the other suggestions, we are very active so not sure if I can up that too much more. I might just casually check with her teach and ask if she's noticed if my daughter gets foods from other classmates. And if she is, try to deal with that at home explaining why I don't want her eating others lunches (their moms worked hard and would like their own kids to eat what they made etc, ... skirting around the real reason lol) And I do like the allowing her to pick out certain snacks and thats all she gets, I will do this with my son too (even though he truely eats soley when he's hungry) but if she eats hers and he hasn't then at least when he does want it I will say sorry but you ate yours already and then it wont become a unfair thing. Thanks

I'm a mom of three kids and from my own experience, sometimes you have to keep pursuing something if you think there's an issue, even if your doctor doesn't. Usually our mom's intuition is correct I'd definitely go back and this time I'd ask for a referral to a dietician, who specializes in pediatric nutrition.

KellyL23

I have noticed that my kids often ask for snacks when they are bored and watching tv, so the more we play family games at night, or just hang out together, the less they care about snacks. But keep up the good work, parenting is the hardest job!

dumb_blondes_rock

Dont put the fat label on your kid...if you ask your mother in law, im sure she would tell you that your hubby got chubby, then grew some and slendered out, then got chubby again and grew some more and slendered out. I have watched MANY kids over the years, and the ones who got chubby were going through growth spurts (the ones that were raised in a healthy way).

People need to stop trying to label it as her having some disease, kids get hungry and can shovel away food from time to time, especially in the winter. If you are feeding her what you say you are, and exercise the way you say you do with her, then dont worry.

If she had celiac she would constantly be ill or complain about not feeling good. Real celiac disease causes super discomfort, its just a major fad right now that everyone swears they have it, or that such and such must mean that person has it.

Francl27

You have to be stricter. Letting her chow food all day is not going to help. I was a chubby kid too, eating what I wanted all the time, and I never learned good eating habits because of it... so I ended up obese.

Tell your family that they can have one snack a day. Pick a time when it's convenient, and stick to it (like, 3pm after school or something). And make it a healthy one - veggies, fruit, maybe a yogurt. Your whole family is going to have to work on this. Yes, it's going to suck, but it's your daughter's health that's at stake. And I'd definitely talk to the teacher about it if you're worried she's eating food from the other kids - maybe she can talk to all the kids and tell them that it's not safe to share food because of allergies (which is true!) and that they shouldn't do it, without targeting your daughter.

I understand it's hard, I have kids too. And they want to snack all day too. But I let them pick one thing that they like (and make it a reasonable serving), and if they're still hungry after that, they can pick some fruit, or yogurt. That's it. I have small kids though... otherwise the cookies/crackers would be a once a week thing and dessert would only be fruit.

janeytom

Hello. I applaud you for being so pro-active with your daughter. Did the doc do a complete blood test, including thyroid? I ask because my "chubby" (8 year old) GD finally had it done and aha! Extreme Hypothyroidism. She's on medication, and we can see a huge difference. Good luck with your daughter.

cuinboston2014

I have a very similar situation with my daughter who is also 7, same height, and only 5 lbs lighter.

However, every year at the pediatricians office her weight/height ratio is getting better and better, meaning she is growing into it.

She always wants to eat so there are two options I give her when I think it's strange timing to be hungry:
1) Eat carrots. No carrots = not hungry
2) Distract her with something else - i.e. reading, coloring, Wii, anything.

I would definitely talk with her teacher - it may not be her full time job to watch kids eat lunch but they do assume responsibility for kids in their rooms within reason. Most teachers should be glad to keep a watchful eye for you if you are being reasonable.

Good luck

ThriceBlessed

I struggled with this with my oldest. No matter what I tried, she wanted to eat too much and be inactive, I kept it in check the best I could, but since I had my own issues with food that I wasn't dealing well with, I failed to a large extent. She remained overweight and is still overweight now that she is grown and married. I have guilt because I know my own food issues are at least partly to blame, but at the same time I also know I am not fully to blame, I have two other children who don't struggle with weight because their personalities didn't lend themselves to sitting still and eating so much like their sister.

Things I would do differently if I could go back in time:

1. Not stress about it so much, but enjoy my time with her instead.
2. Do more physical stuff WITH her, riding bikes, swimming, playing frisbee. If I would have made the time to do these things with her every day, rather than often trying to get her to do them on her own, she may or may not have lost weight, but we would have had a lot more fun together either way.
3. Eliminated fast food. That is one thing I think would have helped, we didn't eat fast food daily, but often enough that I think if we had cut it out, or at least limited it to once a month, she would probably not have gained as much.
4. Reserved candy and "junk food" for parties and holidays only. No chips in the house, no candy, instead fresh fruit and vegetables available to grab whenever, the other stuff reserved for special occasions only. Again, I didn't always have junk around, but more than I should have.
5. I would prepare plates of fruit, raw veggies, small amounts of cheese, and tell her that those were "treats", when she said she was hungry, that is what she'd have been offered.
6. One thing I know I would do differently if I could go back. I would not talk about her weight or my own weight in her hearing. Instead I would do my best to feed her healthy food in moderation, and to be active with her. If I spoke of physical fitness at all it would be in terms of, "Lets see if we are strong enough to lift this up there." or "Last week we ran from here to that tree in 3 minutes, lets see if we can do it a little faster this week!"

Brige2269

Hi there. I have a 10 year old daughter who has been overweight since kindergarden. You can see her in my pics. I have been through all the suggestion you have gotten here so far. Some say, don't talk to your daughter about weight, some say ask your doctor, some say she will grow into her weight.

Here is what I have learned. I did go to my doctor, all test and blood work were fine, so the doctor sent us to a nutritionist. Who gave us a few ideas on food. Honestly, not much help there.

I tried the "grow into her weight" stage between age 6 and 8. This didnt work, she gained as she grew. By the time she was 9 she was 130, I was still freaking.

I decided I needed to talk to her about food, and weight. She knew I was working out, and eating to lose weight. I told her I wanted her to be health and eat better like I do. I explained diabeties to her and yes, I put a bit of scare into her, I told her that some of the people who had diabeties had to have shots. She, like all kids, hate shots. I told her I needed her help to make us both healthy. I asked her to eat the same foods I do. I told her we would still have treats once in a while. I asked her to take walks with me. I told that "I" didnt want to get diabeties, and I needed her to help. We got a dog that "had" to be walked. So, started our weight loss together.

When she turned 10 this last summer she was 156 and now she is 145 at the 6 month mark. Very slow for her, and I want it that way. I am hoping by the time she is a teen, she will have many healthy habits and be at a good weight.

You can only listen to your heart and head when dealing with your own child. You know her better than anyone, and you know what would work to motivate her. So, go with your gut, and don't let anyone put you down for what you feel is right for YOUR daughter. Good luck to both of you. Feel free to send a friend request.

dmcgill50

She is in the 98th percentile for her age and weight. You should have her pediatrician recommend some options. You nor her are the cause, but I do believe that both of you need the advice of a professional. If you aren't satisfied with the advice or don't see results after some time, do not give up looking for something that makes a difference. You will both thank each other later. Don't ever give up working towards something better and make sure she knows that you love her, regardless of her weight or the way she looks. Health is different than Body Image.

http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=7+year+old+girl+80+lbs

bouncycat

have you tried filling out the food diary with what she actually eats? She is eating too many calories and you are thinking it is the snacks. But if they are healthy snacks like fruit and veg then doubling up is not going to be a huge calorie source, 30 baby carrots instead of 15 baby carrots is not much of a dent on total caloric intake if you see what i mean. i would suggest do her diary with what you now she is eating is a first step and see where her KNOWN calories are coming from - it may surprise you! people are talking about lmiting snacks well i dont really agree. My daughter wants to snack alot too and she is welcome to because it is always either an apple, banana, carrots, celery etc nothing else. no chips, chocolate, etc. Be sure to include drinks in the diary, juice and soda calories will add up really quickly. Any doctor or nutrionist worth their salt wiuld ask for a food diary anyway so you might as well take a stab at it first and see what jumps out. How about doing 2 weeks worth? Be brutally honest with it and remember IF there are surprises in there better you figure it out now. If there is nothing suspect there then start looking where thise extra calories are coming for example if she doesnt take her own food to school maybe send it instead. Just an idea so you have a better picture of if it is really the snacking that needs to be tackled in isolation of meals and drinks.