Reaching out for help....I have a problem

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Replies

  • jonnythan
    jonnythan Posts: 10,161 Member
    I lack any motivation of any kind.

    I JUST DON'T CARE!

    Seriously, no one can make you care. You have to come to that on your own.
  • Dugleik
    Dugleik Posts: 125
    Maybe the gym isn't your thing? Try to find an activity that you love, something you're looking forwards to doing.
  • Amitysk
    Amitysk Posts: 705 Member
    I absolutely struggled with complacency at my heaviest. I would get motivated for 3 months, lose 30lbs and then I would get bored...

    I understand... I think you'll go for it and find your inspiration when you're ready. I agree with the others in finding small achievable goals that will keep you moving. They don't even have to be related to the scale!

    Good luck on your journey!
  • easto_79
    easto_79 Posts: 102 Member
    It's crazy, I was a similar way, then I decided to try the Keto diet and cut out all carbs, it was totally addicting and I wanted to eat like that most of the time and I wanted to lose weight, the whole thing was easy and I felt amazing (after the first 3 days of course). It's my lifestyle now, don't get me wrong I have a long way to go and spent two full weeks eatting every carb places in front of me over christmas but I'm so happy to be back at it again.

    Give it a try.

    Good luck you are worth it.
  • keeponkickin
    keeponkickin Posts: 1,520 Member
    Look around you. Do you see any obese old people? You don't. Know why? They don't make it. That was enough for me to care.
  • evanrb92
    evanrb92 Posts: 1
    remember everyday that you are a good person and love yourself, your soul within you and take care of this wonderful soul the body that it resides in be happy to be alive everyday look at the beauty all you. This is helping me I hope it will help you I am 5'3" and 192 lbs and I am struggling to and this is helping me hope to talk to you soon My name is Donna
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    It took being diagnosed with diabetes and high blood pressure for me to make a change. And I attribute my fertliity issues to being overweight. Really a punch in the gut right there.

    If you're not ready to change, if you can't find some spark of motivation, something you want to do for yourself, it's going to be very difficult to stick with any changes you make.

    So why are you here? What made you want to come here, sign up, and post? What is your reason for coming here? Do a complete self-evaluation, really be honest with yourself. Why DON'T you like looking into full length mirrors?
  • MissMaryMac33
    MissMaryMac33 Posts: 1,433 Member
    I felt this way until I had my wakeup call.

    6 years ago.. I was 5'4, 270lbs .... I smoked, I had PCOS (infertility and why I could never have kids), I had type II diabetes and shot myself with insulin twice a day so I could keep eating all the crap I wanted to eat. In my head, I thought if people don't like me the way I am, screw them - they aren't worth it. I didn't care AT ALL and I did absolutely nothing to fix it. I liked being miserable and honestly, I felt like I had screwed up my life so bad I didn't care if I just disappeared I thought I was amazing though!

    Then my dad asked me to just go have my heart checked to see if I had any heart disease (hereditary on his side) and I agreed. That day, I was 44 years old and my heart was 73 years old. Older than my Dad. Older than my Grandpa who died of heart disease.

    I quit smoking cold turkey that night. It sucked. I ate even more, my diabetes got worse. I attempted to fix it with diet, but with PCOS And diabetes that was a double whammy. My Dad (a doctor) actually brought up the idea of Gastric Bypass as a way to cure the diabetes... I decided to do it and it worked. My diabetes was gone instantly in the hospital. I never took another medication for it or needed insulin.

    3 months after surgery I signed up for the Susan G Komen 3-Day --- I figured this would give me a goal and make me keep walking so I could actually finish the 3-Day (60 mile walk) 8 months later. By the time the 3-Day rolled around, I felt so good I had joined a gym and gotten addicted to zumba, I was walking 5-10 miles a day, more on weekends and I was down to 145lbs from 270. This gave me time to change my lifestyle, learn to enjoy exercise and realize how frigging miserable I was before without even knowing it.

    Today, 6 years later I have kept most of the weight off (I gained 15lbs back which is normal). I go to the gym 5x a week and I love it. I have more workout clothes than regular clothes. This year I'm doing a Color Run, and Electric Run and maybe Tough Mudder -- and even if I have to walk,I'll finish.

    I hope you get your wakeup call.

    My biggest regret now is NOT doing this when I was 29 ... I'm 51 now and feel 21.... but I wasted most of my life without knowing it. Do it while you're young ....
  • chopper_pilot
    chopper_pilot Posts: 191 Member
    dont ever use motivation.

    when you dont have it, thats an excuse not to do what you have to do.

    leave it behind.

    it's as addicting as sugar, but doesnt actually do ANYTHING for you.

    focus on self discipline instead, or be motivated by how well you do at keeping your word to yourself.
  • whitebalance
    whitebalance Posts: 1,654 Member
    My biggest regret now is NOT doing this when I was 29 ... I'm 51 now and feel 21.... but I wasted most of my life without knowing it. Do it while you're young ....
    This. So much this.
  • HeatherGTaylor
    HeatherGTaylor Posts: 48 Member
    Hi all,

    I wonder how many of you have exactly the same problem as me.

    I am 5'7, and over 19 stone (about 269lbs) so clearly, I am very overweight.

    I don't feel as though I am massive though. I am, and I see this when I look in a full length mirror, but I just avoid mirrors. Mentally, I don't see myself as being big, and I think this is part of the reason that I don't try to go on a diet.

    I lack any motivation of any kind.

    I am a member of the gym, and go maybe twice a week. I joined the gym in May last year, and I have lost no weight atall. I know I do overeat though, but mainly I JUST DON'T CARE!

    I do care, on the odd occasion, just most of the time I don't.

    Has anyone overcome this? Does anyone have any tips, can anyone offer me any motivation or daily encouragement? Help!

    Feel free to friend me - ALL and ANY advice very much welcomed!

    I had and have this problem on and off. I realized it's not about my image or being "skinny" because that motivation just doesn't seem to stick long term. Work towards just being healthy, eating proper portions and fruit and veg, lean protein and so on....cut out diet soda and so on...exercise for the sake that it's part of a healthy lifestyle. Its great to hear your happy with your image but are you happy with your health?
  • wendybirdgirl
    wendybirdgirl Posts: 52 Member
    Hi all,

    I wonder how many of you have exactly the same problem as me.

    I am 5'7, and over 19 stone (about 269lbs) so clearly, I am very overweight.

    I don't feel as though I am massive though. I am, and I see this when I look in a full length mirror, but I just avoid mirrors. Mentally, I don't see myself as being big, and I think this is part of the reason that I don't try to go on a diet.

    I lack any motivation of any kind.

    I am a member of the gym, and go maybe twice a week. I joined the gym in May last year, and I have lost no weight atall. I know I do overeat though, but mainly I JUST DON'T CARE!

    I do care, on the odd occasion, just most of the time I don't.

    Has anyone overcome this? Does anyone have any tips, can anyone offer me any motivation or daily encouragement? Help!

    Feel free to friend me - ALL and ANY advice very much welcomed!
  • wendybirdgirl
    wendybirdgirl Posts: 52 Member
    Well, have you been to the doctor for a physical? I only ask because that is what motivated me. I have slightly high blood pressure, which I am working on. My blood pressure was great until recently, so I am going to lose weight. Maybe you may have some physical reasons to lose weight, beyond simply the way you look in the mirror.
  • Bambalina_1
    Bambalina_1 Posts: 78 Member
    my friend and i are both fatasses, but we always joke that we don't think we are.

    my mind, i still see myself as i was before i had kids, small and cute. i can see that im fat when i look in the mirror, but i had gotten so used to it that i really didn't think i looked THAT bad. but then someone posts a pic on facebook or something and im like "holy ****. whos that fat chick."

    so i get what you mean, i think. my motivation is to look like what i think i look like, and also to not be totally embarrassed when someone tags me in pics. (also for my kids, live longer, health, blah, blah, blah....)

    Yup I'm with you on this!!
  • 33Freya
    33Freya Posts: 468 Member
    Start reading articles on obesity-related disease and problems. Talk to your doctor. Think of anything you want to do that you currently cannot. Your motivation has to come from the things that you want. Go see a counselor and set some goals. Good luck to you. Here's to better health!!
  • BonnieandClyde29
    BonnieandClyde29 Posts: 1,026 Member
    I'm the same way, usually I love my body, and have the odd insecure moments, and I also didn't lose any weight all last year and I went hard at it too but apparently that was from a temporary medical condition, but I'm all cleared now and going full force...

    I try to look at it this way instead of losing weight I just want to be able to be "healthy" and play sports again, I always had a "pooch", but I never minded it because I was still able to run around all day and not even bat an eye! I haven't been able to do that for a while now, so I want to get back to being active again, if I get a flat stomach in the process then awesome! If not though, then I'm not worried....I don't set unrealistic goals for myself, I like to start small and go along the way....If I set a ludacris goal for myself and don't see results right away, I know me and I'll get upset and want to give up.

    Hope I helped in anyway
  • Katmary71
    Katmary71 Posts: 7,080 Member
    I can relate to not looking into mirrors and not realizing how large I'd become. I had a double back fusion about 6 years ago and quit smoking prior to it. Despite eating healthy I still managed to gain a few pounds every single month, but basically was stuck as I had hardware complications and it needed to come out (my body tried like crazy to spasm it out of me!). It was the most miserable year, I'm sure you can relate to that. Back surgery, aside of the quick laparoscopy repairs, take a long time to recover from, and it goes on after when the doctors say you'll be better. I'm always going to have back and nerve pain issues (from my back and and being injured in a different surgery). Not being as strong as able to do things is very emotional. A lot of times, we go through the same emotions as losing someone (the "me" who was athletic and wasn't limited doing things). I don't know if you struggle or struggled with any of this, but many people do. I've never been close to this side, and boy have things gone haywire. I needed my gallbladder out about 2 years ago and now have a fatty liver. I normally need steroids to calm down my nerve pain, but now I can't take certain medications because of my liver. Despite having endometriosis, my hormones have dipped (good for the endo pain but not my overall health!). I'd been trying to lose weight the whole time, but this terrified me into really doing something about it.

    I CAN tell you that after losing 35 pounds, I have less back pain. The better shape you get in and the more you strengthen your core, the less pain you'll have. Did you go through physical therapy? You may end up being able to do more than what others said, it's you who has to find what you can do or try and strengthen your body so you have more endurance and ability. I commend you for continuing to work out, I think that's a good thing and something in you is caring at least about what you can do and improving your back pain. There may be things you can't do because of the surgery, but overall, I can say the more you move and less weight you carry, the better you will feel. It's hard on the body to carry extra weight, especially when there's already a structural problem. I never had a big stomach before (pear shaped) until after my surgery and WOW did that add pain to my back! Thank goodness most of that went first!

    I do feel you care, but am unsure where you stand. I do hope you start to care for the sake of your health and back as I would hate for it to worsen. If you decide to stick around and improve things, I'm more than willing to be your friend. Best of luck!

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