The day after - who should contact who?

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Replies

  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    And if it was a ONS, don't call me or text me. The O stands for one for a reason. Although, I have little to no real world experience in that regard.

    Nine years ago I had a one night stand.

    We're engaged now.

    yeah but did he contact you the next day...
    Yep. And on his way to work every morning and on his way home every night for the next week (he lived a few hours away). And then he took me to Disneyworld the next weekend.
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    I call them the next morning...







    from the kitchen to ask how they'd like their eggs..
  • Some_Watery_Tart
    Some_Watery_Tart Posts: 2,250 Member
    I call them the next morning...







    from the kitchen to ask how they'd like their eggs..
    :love:
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
    And if it was a ONS, don't call me or text me. The O stands for one for a reason. Although, I have little to no real world experience in that regard.

    Nine years ago I had a one night stand.

    We're engaged now.

    yeah but did he contact you the next day...
    Yep. And on his way to work every morning and on his way home every night for the next week (he lived a few hours away). And then he took me to Disneyworld the next weekend.

    That really is sweet.

    I never tried this. Explaining the fake name would have been awkward.
  • DMZ_1
    DMZ_1 Posts: 2,889 Member
    It is a simple question but it does not have a simple answer.

    In a sense, you are lucky if you even get a phone call now. People don't often pick up the phone for the purpose of voice transmission, particularly in the early stages of a relationship. There are people I know of both sexes that are terrible in picking up a phone for a phone call.

    A lot of this answer would depend upon how quickly sex occurred in the relationship and if it is just casual sex.

    Technologies are a major disruptor in early stage dating. It often takes years for a solid set of generally accepted practices to develop around them. Phone rules evolved from the home phone era, to the early 2000s pre text cell phone era, to the social media and text messaging era.

    Both sides have to worry about coming off as too needy. Hey, image is everything.

    In more cases than not, it probably ends up being the man who either calls or texts the woman after the first instance of sex.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    And if it was a ONS, don't call me or text me. The O stands for one for a reason. Although, I have little to no real world experience in that regard.

    Nine years ago I had a one night stand.

    We're engaged now.

    yeah but did he contact you the next day...
    Yep. And on his way to work every morning and on his way home every night for the next week (he lived a few hours away). And then he took me to Disneyworld the next weekend.

    That really is sweet.

    I never tried this. Explaining the fake name would have been awkward.
    lol

    I REALLY wasn't wanting a relationship at the time and he was supposed to be going away for like six months for Navy stuff, so I figured it would be a fun fling.

    So much for that ...
  • Some_Watery_Tart
    Some_Watery_Tart Posts: 2,250 Member
    It is a simple question but it does not have a simple answer.

    In a sense, you are lucky if you even get a phone call now. People don't often pick up the phone for the purpose of voice transmission, particularly in the early stages of a relationship. There are people I know of both sexes that are terrible in picking up a phone for a phone call.

    A lot of this answer would depend upon how quickly sex occurred in the relationship and if it is just casual sex.

    Technologies are a major disruptor in early stage dating. It often takes years for a solid set of generally accepted practices to develop around them. Phone rules evolved from the home phone era, to the early 2000s pre text cell phone era, to the social media and text messaging era.

    Both sides have to worry about coming off as too needy. Hey, image is everything.

    In more cases than not, it probably ends up being the man who either calls or texts the woman after the first instance of sex.
    Speaking of over-thinking things.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    the RULE is you let the guy wait 3 days to call. If he doesn't call, then you blow his phone UP. Also, show up at his place of employment and his house and all of his buddies houses, too. Just to be sure he knows you made the effort.





    KIDDING!!! There are no rules in dating. Have fun. If you want to call, call. It's not that serious.
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
    Yeah yeah, in a perfect world it wouldn't / shouldn't matter but it does. The day after the first time sleeping with a guy, if she texts him, she's needy. If he texts her, he's demanding. So they just ignore each other.

    I'm sure there will flow a stream of posts "I don't play games like that," but you can say what you want, the games are there like 'em or not.

    So really now. What are the rules?

    Well, that tells you how old fashioned I am. I just assumed if I were sleeping with him the first time, I would have dated him for a while, though I think it was only a couple of dates with my (now) husband. So I wouldn't have slept with him if I didn't think he was going to call me the next day. Like I said earlier, I knew he would and he did.
  • heylookitsval
    heylookitsval Posts: 1,141 Member
    7812651d8666d681a866277d7152e239.jpg
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    Call me old fashioned... but a text? No way.


    Sex or a good date deserves a phone call if there is an interest in seeing someone again. No interest? No call. End of story.

    Amen. After my husband and I did it the first time, he showed up at my door the very next evening. (We were neighbors.)
  • 970Mikaela1
    970Mikaela1 Posts: 2,013 Member
    I would contact her. I'd be like "You want pancakes or french toast?'' Then id get up a head to the kitchen.
  • Mrs_Marvel
    Mrs_Marvel Posts: 39 Member
    The rules are simple. If it's too awkward for either person to contact the other, they probably shouldn't have slept together in the first place.
  • PBsMommy
    PBsMommy Posts: 1,166 Member
    All you doggone sinners!!!


    /end sarcastic font

    Just because I haven't seen anyone say it yet.
  • Cali_Chica
    Cali_Chica Posts: 895 Member
    The person with unlimited outgoing call minutes
  • Chieflrg
    Chieflrg Posts: 9,097 Member
    It matters if they are on my FL or not. Sometimes I have to delete them...
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
    i think you should contact your friends and let them know before anything else....or just send the pictures you took proving it happened
  • ball_FXDWG
    ball_FXDWG Posts: 44 Member
    Don't people make plans for their honeymoon before the wedding night? Why would anyone have to contact the other person, I would think you would be spending the day with your new spouse anyway.
  • SexKittenlovesitrough
    SexKittenlovesitrough Posts: 486
    call him? are you kidding me?

    If i like him, I do it the right way...

    i follow him around the school yard and throw rocks at him while calling him a smelly butt.

    DUH
  • Cre8veLifeR
    Cre8veLifeR Posts: 1,062 Member
    I wouldn't sleep with someone (for the most part lol) unless this was a no-brainer question, as in you both want to contact each other and who cares who does it first.

    If I did - assuming you are talking about like a first date hop in the sack kind of thing - (and I have), I wouldn't contact him and I wouldn't expect him to contact me. Mine did lol. We became FWB's.

    In my experience, sex is MUCH better with someone you want to do it with again. Practice makes perfect. :wink:
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    Day after I usually woke up next to whomever in my bed, so this was a moot question. If I liked him enough to have sex with him again, breakfast was made. I didn't, I would have a family function I needed to rush him off to get ready for.
  • badgerdh
    badgerdh Posts: 179 Member
    For me the rule of thumb is that typically the person that cums second should be the one who makes the contact.

    I try to stick with that rule pretty religiously.
  • missomgitsica
    missomgitsica Posts: 496 Member
    I don't think it matters either way. If it's a one night stand, chances are nobody's calling anybody again. If it happens in an already established relationship, then it doesn't matter.
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member
    I don't think I have ever put this much thought into it.

    I don't think I have ever had a problem contacting and never giving a second weird thought to a girl who hit me up first.

    HOWEVER

    What is CONSIDERABLY more awkward than someone hitting you up hours after is the person you see weeks later randomly out and neither of you have contacted each other. It's kind of that "oh ****, was she expecting me to text or call her" kind of vibe. You know the one. You can't quite tell if the person is cool or is just playing cool and thinking about how big of a ****head you are in her head....

    Now I am really overthinking this. I will stop.
  • SexKittenlovesitrough
    SexKittenlovesitrough Posts: 486
    For me the rule of thumb is that typically the person that cums second should be the one who makes the contact.

    I try to stick with that rule pretty religiously.

    You dont get called often do you
  • wanna_b_there
    wanna_b_there Posts: 295 Member
    Thanks for playing! I don't know what to say now, so I;ll just post this:


    E5XJQDt.jpg
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
    what if it was a threesome..which gal do you call first? or which guy? or do you call the guy or the girl first?
  • PBsMommy
    PBsMommy Posts: 1,166 Member
    what if it was a threesome..which gal do you call first? or which guy? or do you call the guy or the girl first?

    Didn't ya mama teach you... Ladies first

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