Remarks others have made about your weight...

Sarahbear83

When I was about 12 or 13, my 'best friends' and I went to the beach. I was walking down to the water in my bathing suit and they were sitting down up on the beach, snickering at me. When I turned around they commented that I had cellulite. I was about 115 lbs and 5'4.

After I had my first child, over 8 years ago, I had given my sister some of my pre-pregnancy clothes for school and commented that I wanted them back when I got skinny again. As I left the room, my mother and cousin said 'she never really was skinny.' My husband, wonderful man that he is, told them that I had lost a lot of weight already from the pregnancy and put them in their place.

The rudest of all were my customers when I worked in the lingerie department. I had women coming in and asking advice about buying things for bed ridden people, who are sometimes overweight due to this, and one woman asked about sizing. She mentioned that whoever she was buying for was 'about my size' and I said to her that I usually wear the XL(8) in most brands we carried. She looked at me and held up the panties and asked 'Really?!' like she was shocked and then said that those were way too small for who she was buying them for. I also had several customers ask if I was pregnant or when I was due, and it was pleasing enough to see the looks on their face when I said 'Not pregnant, just fat.'. Most of them at least were just trying to be chatty and felt awful for asking. It was the people who commented on my size in comparison to someone really big they knew that hurt. It's hard to give good customer service with that kind of blow.

3110cynthia

i'm 5'0" - 214 - it's very relative - i look attractive at 150 and about a size 9 cuz i have very large shoulders even when i am "thin" for me that is - and that is my goal even though my bmi says 110 is ideal - i would look anorexic truly at that weight truly - once at 135 i was told by family and friends that i was too thin - and numbers-wise that's large for someone my size - but right now - i'll tell you what - my legs shake to walk - i can't bear 114 at my height and muscle structure - so it's damn near an emergency to lose weight - dr. says i neeed back surgery - aaaaahhhhhh such is life - i'm hoping very much this site is the answer - started about 14 days ago and have lost 8 lbs so so good so far - i'm feeling pretty good about it

re: fat comments - i've been congradulated on my pregnancy and of course my sister's child said straight up "you're fat" but who can blame him, i am. Still even though an innocent statement it hurt to be said so bluntly

i have found that pregnant clothes fit me well cuz i carry weight all on top - i look like a carmel apple - chicken legs with a large torso - not good health wise

i hope you feel better with all this support - that's what it's all about - and welcome to the site for real not just on the fone - good luck

Maggie1960

Wow, there a re some very nasty-minded people around aren't there?:noway:
I have never had anyone be really ride to me about my weight - although I was asked when my baby was due when he was one week old (though that's understandable because my pregnant belly hadn't shrunk back at all at that point)

The worst thing I can think of, is on holiday in Egypt in August this year, I was chatting to a fellow holiday maker, who was a lot bigger than me, probably 100lbs heavier, who referred to the pair of us as both being 'larger ladies' as if we were the same size. :grumble:

As soon as I got home, I logged on here and have managed to shed 14lbs already from my 200lb body and will continue until no-one can ever include me in the larger ladies club again.

Adusenka

I never was actually thin.. but I was never fat per say (until now I guess..) but I heard people say nasty things about my weight since elementary school.. teachers, peers, everyone I think.. doctors used to be really nice when they said "ah youre in normal range.. but.. well.. you should do something about yourself) And it got worse when I was in high school and teachers were like "go on, show everyone how fat you are" and "oh, youre gonna eat whole chocolate by yourself? of course you are.." etc.. I had problems with eating disorders then..

Ofc my parents are very "nice" too.. my dad keeps telling me Im fat and that he is sure I wanna eat that and that. and comments like: "oh, you came to visit us.. we have to fill the fridge for you, Were sure youll eat it all again"
and ye, rather enormous old lady offered me a seat in tram cos she thought I was pregnant..

every bit of that hurt like hell but I will show them

tiarapants

I've had so many comments - all the normal, obnoxious stuff. However, one that really got to me was this week from my dad. I was putting my jacket on and he said to me, 'you can see that you are starting to lose weight'. I've lost 91 pounds for goodness sake and have lost 14 inches off my bust, 14 inches off my waist and 15 inches off my hips ... This year! Grr. x

Scorpiomom222

I've had pleanty of comments, I can't really pull anything specific to mind. The kids around here are all very outspoken so you just have to learn to "get over it" pretty quickly or you just wouldn't be able to function.

However one incident comes to mind regarding my mother and granny. My dear Granny was one of those poor kids who contracted Polio from a Diptheria inoculation when she was only 2 years old and after having had to have various muscles removed from her right leg, it is much weaker and much shorter than her good leg. What's more, the polio weakened her muscles all over her body. Well her bad leg was quite inflamed and painful once so my mum took her to see the doctor. It's been a recurring problem (though thankfully not so frequently that it causes any constant kind of issue) and he said she really should loose some weight as she had quite poor circulation in this leg and it was just exacerbating the problem. She pointed out that she had been on a near constant diet for years because she couldn't exercise: she can't even move her arms very much due to muscle weakness let alone walk very far, and if we take her on family outings it has to be with the wheel chair. It's not just the bad leg, her whole body just cannot cope as well as it used to.

So does he offer her any encouragement or give her any advice on how she can otherwise get some exercise?

No he doesn't. Instead, he turns to my mum (who is genuinely just a big woman) and says "And what's YOUR excuse?"

Apparently my mum and Gran just sat there in stunned silence, but I can tell you now my dad was down the next day putting in a formal complaint, and he wasn't seen around there for very much longer (say what you like about the NHS, but it will deal with troublesome self important GP's when they cross the line). I get the feeling he had ticked off a few patients...my own experience with him hadn't exactly been fantastic...when I asked for the contraceptive implant because I'd read that the pill I was on was dangerous for someone who suffered focal migraines as I do, he scoffed and told me "that's for stupid council estate girls who can't remember to take their pill every day, you're not one of THOSE girls are you? You're on a completely adequate method of birth control."

Thus failing to answer my question or concerns at all and rather inappropriate anyway since I was a 16 year old virgin and using it for completely none birth control reasons ¬_¬

You know what the stupid thing is though? He was probably one of THE fattest men I've ever seen...

Maybe he's one of those confused types. Have you heard of black people actually hating black people? Maybe he's one of those!

Tasha1476

When I was only 12, my grandmother told me "If you were skinny, boys would be all over you" The thing is, I wasn't fat then, and if I hadn't started feeling so bad about myself, I may never have been. Its hard to believe what people say without thinking.

kuggsy24

lets not get hung up on what people say yes some of it is meant to be nasty but in my opinion its just narrow minded slips of the tongue laugh it off and fire3 back with an agreement here are a few suggestions.
start with something like i agree in fact
im that fat when i went to school i sat next to everybody
im that fat when i buy clothes i get a group discount
im that fat when i turn round im a year older
im that fat my belt size is eqautor im that fat i make the butter dish jealous
im sure you all av plenty to add but the trick is to take it on the chin like a pro and see it for what it is ie usually som ignoramous speaking b4 the brain is in gear i feel if you agree with them by making such a remark it defuses the moment better than a f you blow back

66PollyAnna

My aunt said to me as we prepared for group photo: you should get in the middle. You don't want to look bigger. People on the end always look bigger."

CHANGES4ME

:sad: the 1 that i hear the most from sum of my grson's friends

---

" fatty-fatty 2 by 4 couldn't get through the bathroom door, so she sat upon your knee; uh-ohhhh folks watch out there goes her pee.... ":grumble: :ohwell: :embarassed: :frown:

mrsoverload

since i gain most of my weight in the middle, i'm constantly asked " r u pregnant"" oh how i hate that question

as i was looking back through my old photos i realised that even when i was at the weight i now want to be, i was asked that same question - gosh what do i do when i hit my goal

ninakretina

Well, my mom used to call me "gorda puerca asquerosa" when I was a kid, which translates to "despicable, disgusting pig", and I have been obese since I was 5. It was pretty much on a daily basis, her anger issues are horrible so once she snapped, it would be fat-bashing for hours. Now that I'm older she hasn't called me like that in years, and I thought I was over it, but it seems like it can hurt me a little.


At least my granny calls me "gorda de oro"(golden fatty) but she has Alzheimer's and she hugs me when she calls me like that, so she's allowed! ^_^

LaSirena29

Several years ago, my mother was diagnosed with a fairly bad thyroid problem. Her doctor told her it was hereditary and that I should get myself checked regularly. My doctor had recently retired and my insurance company had transfered me to another doctor. I decided to give him a try and made an appointment to get some test done. After explaining about my mother & what her doctor had said, he looked me up and down, sighed and said, "Every overweight woman wants to believe she has a thyroid problem, so she can have an excuse. We'll go ahead and run the tests if you really want." Excuse me? I'm here for tests at another doctors suggestion and this is the attitude I get? :mad:

I told him he was an a****le and that I didn't need him to do anything for me, got dressed and stormed out. I filed a formal complaint with his medical group and with the insurance company before changing doctors. They still tried to bill me for the co-pay for the visit.

ktbug1186

ohhh....Ive had an ex say to me one day after us working out at the gym..."I saw you running in some shorts and I thought "oh my god, she has gotten even fatter"...and how bout the " Man, I am so full..."ya well, you look full too"...and I've heard much worse! Worst thing is, he didn't think anything was wrong with what he said.

lauz09

Oh I have plenty of these comments. Lets see...

I was in 3rd grade at a sleep over and two of my friends were climbing a fence and they told me "get off the fence, you are too big, you'll just break it." That was the first time anyone (outside the family) had mentioned I was "different".

When ever my father saw an Elephant on T.V. he would say "Hey, I didn't know you were on T.V." That was always fun to hear. My (extended) family is one of the worse for making these kinds of comments, but I will leave it at that.

I could go on for days but the last one I will mention was in my freshman year of college, the first semester. I had just made a group of friends (at a school my parent's picked for me) and I was actually having a good time. One night, my first weekend staying at college, I got all dressed up and felt extremely good about myself, I had recently lost weight and felt confident. Well that night I noticed three of the four texting eachother and laughing, then one said "hahaha, yeah they could be Curtains!" Seeing as I am not stupid, I knew they were talking about my clothing, and the one person who wasn't apart of the "fun" confrimed it.. Well I went home early that weekend and when they found out I knew they where making fun of me, all four "friends" stopped talking to me. And at the end of the Semester I left the shool and took a year off. That was 3 years ago and it still hurts. I thought I had found some really good friends, boy, was I wrong.

jantawa

Its true by now that we have all learned to grin and bear it, and more or less roll with the punches. Even so, when people say cruel things, it is amazing how that stays with you. My mother always taught me to be very careful in what you say, because you can never take it back.

missmiller1

Even though my mother has been overweight for decades, she seems to have made the most comments about my weight.

One day shopping for some clothes in the men's section, since those were the only clothes large enough to fit me, my mother leans over and asks me if I'm a *kitten*. Uh, no.

I have a twin sister and my mom was constantly telling me that my butt was bigger than my sisters. A favorite of hers would be to tell family members that we looked like her, but had bigger hips than she ever did in high school.

Aww, mothers...

vkpmusic

I went for an interview once for a secretary job and the guy looked me up and down and said hmmm i dont think you are right for what i am looking for, but let me think how i can help you...maybe if i bought you some trainers and told you to run around the block a few times that would help you lose some weight....i was so shocked... i just said thank you for interviewing me and left the building. I came out onto the street and cried my eyes out. I was 200lbs at the time, but didnt look too big to work as a secretary...still hurts now, the only justice is that i now have an amazing job much better than working for him.

Sweetie, he didn't want a secretary...he wanted a mistress!

It's amazing how rude people can be. I haven't gotten the weight one but I'm rather large chested and I've had people say "you know, they make minimizers" WHILE I was working in the bra dept. DUH! I'm wearing one. Or how about (from a coworker) Here comes Val and her BOOBS! Should have reported her to hr...but I was young and inexperienced.

Just look at them and go oh? Thanks. BTW, they make wrinkle cream that's AMAZING for those lines...or you could do botox. I think it works wonders! :laugh:

cynditoney

I remember women in my church when I was growing up saying "you are big, but you have such a pretty face. Why don't you lose some weight?" I was about 125 pounds and in high school. Many of these women wonder why I quit going to that church. What's funny about these same women, is that when I got to my largest (316) none of them would dare say anything about my weight.

When I used to sell incense at a flea market, the owners put down these rocks in the walk areas. I slipped on the rocks and went to the office to see if they had a first aid kit. The remark was made that I should not try to sue because I was fat and "fat people fall". I was not even thinking about suing, I just fell on the rocks and wanted a stupid bandaid!!

I, sadly have plenty of these stories, coming from my mom and even my "best friend". People can be ugly and many use these remarks to make themselves feel better about their own issues.

Alioth

Sheesh. What is wrong with people to say junk like that? It boggles my mind. :noway: I'm really grateful for my family. They can be blunt about weight, but it's out of concern.

I've gotten comments from strangers though similar to the ones you guys have gotten, such as "Don't gain any more weight--you won't like it."

One time a guy I hadn't seen in a couple years saw a photo of me online. He said, "When did you become such a chubby bunny? I remember you as a tiny little thing."

The worst for me is when people comment on my chest (which has gotten fatter as I have). Why people think it's okay to freely comment on a person's butt or rate their boobs is beyond me. :mad:

I can't help but have those kinds of comments in the back of my mind when I'm in a fitting room trying on clothes.

SJSchwartz

A few years ago I took my, then recently adopted, 6 month old daughter to the doctors for a well-check. She was extremely chubby due to her bio-mom stuffing a bottle in her mouth everytime she made a noise. So as the doctor was checking her out, the doc looked at me and said, "I see Mom still has all her baby weight still on her, but why is baby so fat?" Let me repeat, my daughter was ADOPTED by me!

cynditoney

The worst for me is when people comment on my chest (which has gotten fatter as I have). Why people think it's okay to freely comment on a person's butt or rate their boobs is beyond me. :mad:

I was on disability for 9 months, and when I went back to work (after losing 85 pounds) I was treated to a discussion about how my boobs are sagging. I never realized I was a topic of interest. It stung quite a bit, since one of the girls in the discussion had only met me the day before.

lkm111

I've got a good one I haven't seen yet. "You got the brains, your sister got the looks."

Heard that most of my life. Not demoralizing at all, no! :grumble:

What happened to being beautiful on the inside? There are a lot of people I know who are thin and beautiful on the outside, but I would never want to be them because they are so disgusting on the inside.

abyt42

Okay: a positive one that sounds bad (but it was definitely well meant). From my DH, after an appraising look: "Looks like you're losing some of that gut."


(Of course, as part of foreplay when I was 38 he said, "You're going to be forty..."..... Tact of a thrown brick, but a heart of gold.)

rfialkiewicz

Most of the comments I get are annoying on the opposite end. Because I only have 20 or so lbs and don't look that heavy, even though I'm unhealthy I get to hear things like, "Oh, honey, you're thin enough!"
Or "You're skinny, here eat this."
Or "You don't need to get that much in shape, really."
Or "I can't have this because I'm trying to loose weight, but here why don't you eat it."
Or "You're on a diet? You don't need to diet, hun, you'll be too thin." (Even though I'm slowly gaining out of my wardrobe again. Like I don't know when I've gained weight.)
Or "You don't need to be on a diet!"
(Both of the above two usually precedes my snide remark about how "diet" is something everyone has, what you eat is your "diet". I'm trying for a healthier one.)
Or "You can have some! You're healthy enough!"
Or my favorite, "You don't need to loose weight, I need to loose weight." Then this particular person stuffed a mouthful of deep-fried cheesecake slathered in chocolate and whipped cream in her mouth.

rfialkiewicz

What happened to being beautiful on the inside? There are a lot of people I know who are thin and beautiful on the outside, but I would never want to be them because they are so disgusting on the inside.

Best quote I ever heard:

"Beauty may be only skin deep but ugly is to the bone."

And I have no idea who said it.

ljm0104

I was working out at the ymca and a guy was mad because all the ellipticals were being used. I happend the be on the elliptical closest to the walkway, he came up to me and told me I was to fat to be using the machine and that I needed to get off so people like him wouldn't become like me. :devil:

rfialkiewicz

Ho Oh, I just remembered one from way back when I was a teenager. I was 18 at the time and about 160 (I'm only 5'0" to put that in reference.) I was helping out backstage at one of my sister's dance recitals and had a student's mom look at me and say, "So you must be the sister who doesn't dance."

I asked what she meant by that.

"You're just... you know... heavier." She replied.

I did dance at the time. In fact, I was performing that night.

nicolee516

I get the...you really shouldn't lose any more weight...it's not healthy....you won't ever be able to get preggo....you will be too skinny...Whah?:noway: I am still not even in the healthy BMI range! My Body fat is still way too high...what the....So I have been getting the opposite end of stuff...its just as annoying as when I was 26 lbs heavier.

tater8589

Geezz... Some people just suck ace hard core.

My fathers mother (who I nolonger speak to) told me when I was 12 that I was fat... Well I was 5'4" and 75lbs... WTF where was I fat, my lil toe?
My ex, when he decided he wanted to be an ex (and didn't have the guts to just tell me that) told me I was fat and no longer attractive, that I had lost the "Barbie" body I had when we met (4yrs prior)... I must mention... my hips had widened and I actually was in the best shape I'd ever been in. I was starting a six pack, ran every day and lifted (kettle bells) every other. OH and the girl he left me for.. well she is about 2 of me and half my height (im 5'7")