Warning: This is a rant

devil_in_a_blue_dress

You're not dating Nutellabrah, are you? :huh:

DeltaZero

You are pretty, want to be my friend?

Soufre

And he is your boyfriend why?

Just because he won't help me at the gym, doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Jesus *kitten* everybody...

imaburnin

I'm alarmed at the "it's a guy thing" comment....he sounds like one of those "go make me a sandwich" kind of boyfriends. Keep working hard and don't give it up because he feels threatened you'll be a become a better lifter than him ;-)

Hauntinglyfit

1. I would not take advice on form from someone who goes to the gym once a month.

2. Stop going to the gym with him, go alone.

3. You don't need to tell him what you're doing. Start squatting, get dat *kitten*, and when he cops a feel just say "yeah honey, that treadmill's doing wonders"

4. He is kinda right about googling/youtubing. Watch tons of videos until you get the idea then go ahead and do it. Start with the bar until you're comfortable with your form, then up your weights. If really unsure, ask someone who looks like they know what they're doing for some pointers. Most people will gladly help.

5. I recommend Starting strength or Stronglifts as a routine. They are easy to follow and effective.

Atishi87

All you need to do is ask some other guys for help whilst at the gym and while you are at it, flirt a lil! That' ll show him! Sounds like he is insecure about you looking hotter.

WheezyFbb

He was right in one thing though, the internet is a wonderful place to get information if you go to the appropriate sources.

My husband is a lifter, but because of timing circumstances, we didn't get to work out together except maybe once a month. I learned almost everything by watching videos and just mimicking the more seasoned lifters in the gym. Most people learn it by just going and doing it.

That could backfire if you're a beginner without much knowledge though. For example, an experienced lifter could be doing a body-part split routine with several isolation exercises. It would be a mistake for a beginner to mimic such a routine.

Being informed can save you a lot of trial and error.

Lesa_Sass

And he is your boyfriend why?

Just because he won't help me at the gym, doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Jesus *kitten* everybody...

Exactly what were you expecting people to say?

Soufre

And he is your boyfriend why?

Just because he won't help me at the gym, doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Jesus *kitten* everybody...

Exactly what were you expecting people to say?

You're right. This is the internet. Silly me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Mia_RagazzaTosta

You're not dating Nutellabrah, are you? :huh:

Marry me

Cranquistador

what?

leave the boyfriend alone


if you want to do something learn it yourself.

There are plenty of videos on form AND groups here that will do form checks etc.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/10118-eat-train-progress

thesupremeforce

And he is your boyfriend why?

Just because he won't help me at the gym, doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Jesus *kitten* everybody...

Exactly what were you expecting people to say?

You're right. This is the internet. Silly me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Your biggest problem is that people with the mindset that your boyfriend seems to possess (based on your assessment and explanation of the situation) aren't likely to be swayed by "facts" and change their minds. Links probably aren't going to help you, because he won't be interested in looking, and even IF he did, he's unlikely to give a big enough crap to change his approach. He's not going to suddenly become a helpful gym buddy, especially if he doesn't even want to go to the gym in the first place.

In short, he either has no idea what he's talking about, or he doesn't want to "help you" in the gym (likely because he doesn't want to be there). Find your help elsewhere. It will save you time, and much banging your head against the wall.

devil_in_a_blue_dress

You're not dating Nutellabrah, are you? :huh:

Marry me

I do! I do!

RunMyOregonBunsOff

Guys like that aren't likely to change their view even if you show them links proving you can't spot reduce. Go to the gym without him and find other people to help you. Before you leave do a set of crunches. If he asks how the gym was and what you did just say fine and you did some crunches and stuff. At some point plant something so that he can come to the conclusion that weights aren't just for guys on his own because most likely, he's the only one he will listen to anyway.

BeachGingerOnTheRocks

He was right in one thing though, the internet is a wonderful place to get information if you go to the appropriate sources.

My husband is a lifter, but because of timing circumstances, we didn't get to work out together except maybe once a month. I learned almost everything by watching videos and just mimicking the more seasoned lifters in the gym. Most people learn it by just going and doing it.

That could backfire if you're a beginner without much knowledge though. For example, an experienced lifter could be doing a body-part split routine with several isolation exercises. It would be a mistake for a beginner to mimic such a routine.

Being informed can save you a lot of trial and error.

There was the part where I suggested she pick up a couple books and watch a ton of videos. Obviously she's not going to mimic a routine in its entirety. Watching other people perform the exercises she wants to perform, however....There is a distinction, you know. If she wants to learn to squat, for example, she's not going to mimic the guy doing bent over rows.

But not really sure I care that much. The otherwise sound advice in here is being ignored, and the only focus seems to be that people think OP's boyfriend is a jerk.

OP, why come on the internet and go on for a couple paragraphs about what a jerk your boyfriend is if you don't want people to agree with you? There's plenty of sound advice here. Either take it or not. I'm not interested in giving any more pointers.

davert123

Re spot loss. Its difficult to prove that spot reduction doesn't work - its like saying prove green fairies don't live at the bottom of your garden :-) Clever science type people guess that you can't based on the way they understand the way the body works though.

devil_in_a_blue_dress

And he is your boyfriend why?

Just because he won't help me at the gym, doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Jesus *kitten* everybody...

Exactly what were you expecting people to say?

You're right. This is the internet. Silly me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I mean, if you don't want people thinking your boyfriend is a science eschewing brah, maybe throw in a compliment for two his way when you rag on him on the internet beyond "he had a nice body".

MsJulielicious

The one thing he got right was the suggestion to use youtube for form tips. I found really helpful stuff.
That's how I learned how to squat properly, and do sumo dead lifts, and stiff legged dead lifts, etc.
I also watched and imitated the super experienced lifters at my gym.
Just leave him home and figure it out with the resources you have available.

ironanimal

I don't get all the abuse that guy is taking.

So he's ignorant about the finer details of fitness and lifting - so what? 99% of the population are the exact same way. He's not a douche because he isn't able to teach, or because he believes some widely-believed, albeit false, myths.

If he was actively trying to discourage you, I'd be a little more sympathetic to some of the vitriol, but eh - he believes he has your best interests at heart from the sounds of it.

_Terrapin_

:sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad:

Just break up.

:sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: Oh wait the OP and her boyfriend?!? Maybe just lift without him?