Warning: This is a rant

2

Replies

  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    what?

    leave the boyfriend alone


    if you want to do something learn it yourself.

    There are plenty of videos on form AND groups here that will do form checks etc.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/10118-eat-train-progress
  • thesupremeforce
    thesupremeforce Posts: 1,206 Member
    And he is your boyfriend why?

    Just because he won't help me at the gym, doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Jesus *kitten* everybody...

    Exactly what were you expecting people to say?

    You're right. This is the internet. Silly me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    Your biggest problem is that people with the mindset that your boyfriend seems to possess (based on your assessment and explanation of the situation) aren't likely to be swayed by "facts" and change their minds. Links probably aren't going to help you, because he won't be interested in looking, and even IF he did, he's unlikely to give a big enough crap to change his approach. He's not going to suddenly become a helpful gym buddy, especially if he doesn't even want to go to the gym in the first place.

    In short, he either has no idea what he's talking about, or he doesn't want to "help you" in the gym (likely because he doesn't want to be there). Find your help elsewhere. It will save you time, and much banging your head against the wall.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    You're not dating Nutellabrah, are you? :huh:

    Marry me

    I do! I do!
  • RunMyOregonBunsOff
    RunMyOregonBunsOff Posts: 862 Member
    Guys like that aren't likely to change their view even if you show them links proving you can't spot reduce. Go to the gym without him and find other people to help you. Before you leave do a set of crunches. If he asks how the gym was and what you did just say fine and you did some crunches and stuff. At some point plant something so that he can come to the conclusion that weights aren't just for guys on his own because most likely, he's the only one he will listen to anyway.
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member

    He was right in one thing though, the internet is a wonderful place to get information if you go to the appropriate sources.

    My husband is a lifter, but because of timing circumstances, we didn't get to work out together except maybe once a month. I learned almost everything by watching videos and just mimicking the more seasoned lifters in the gym. Most people learn it by just going and doing it.

    That could backfire if you're a beginner without much knowledge though. For example, an experienced lifter could be doing a body-part split routine with several isolation exercises. It would be a mistake for a beginner to mimic such a routine.

    Being informed can save you a lot of trial and error.

    There was the part where I suggested she pick up a couple books and watch a ton of videos. Obviously she's not going to mimic a routine in its entirety. Watching other people perform the exercises she wants to perform, however....There is a distinction, you know. If she wants to learn to squat, for example, she's not going to mimic the guy doing bent over rows.

    But not really sure I care that much. The otherwise sound advice in here is being ignored, and the only focus seems to be that people think OP's boyfriend is a jerk.

    OP, why come on the internet and go on for a couple paragraphs about what a jerk your boyfriend is if you don't want people to agree with you? There's plenty of sound advice here. Either take it or not. I'm not interested in giving any more pointers.
  • davert123
    davert123 Posts: 1,568 Member
    Re spot loss. Its difficult to prove that spot reduction doesn't work - its like saying prove green fairies don't live at the bottom of your garden :-) Clever science type people guess that you can't based on the way they understand the way the body works though.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    And he is your boyfriend why?

    Just because he won't help me at the gym, doesn't mean he's a terrible person. Jesus *kitten* everybody...

    Exactly what were you expecting people to say?

    You're right. This is the internet. Silly me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    I mean, if you don't want people thinking your boyfriend is a science eschewing brah, maybe throw in a compliment for two his way when you rag on him on the internet beyond "he had a nice body".
  • MsJulielicious
    MsJulielicious Posts: 708 Member
    The one thing he got right was the suggestion to use youtube for form tips. I found really helpful stuff.
    That's how I learned how to squat properly, and do sumo dead lifts, and stiff legged dead lifts, etc.
    I also watched and imitated the super experienced lifters at my gym.
    Just leave him home and figure it out with the resources you have available.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    I don't get all the abuse that guy is taking.

    So he's ignorant about the finer details of fitness and lifting - so what? 99% of the population are the exact same way. He's not a douche because he isn't able to teach, or because he believes some widely-believed, albeit false, myths.

    If he was actively trying to discourage you, I'd be a little more sympathetic to some of the vitriol, but eh - he believes he has your best interests at heart from the sounds of it.
  • _Terrapin_
    _Terrapin_ Posts: 4,301 Member
    :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad:
    Just break up.
    :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: Oh wait the OP and her boyfriend?!? Maybe just lift without him?
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    interesting thread..OP comes on and says that BF is an ahole, etc etc….ohtheer posters agree, and OP then goes off on rant on said posters for agreeing with her that said BF is an ahole….sorry I am late to the party ..

    OP - you are dating a broscientist get used to it or dump the douche...
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
    interesting thread..OP comes on and says that BF is an ahole, etc etc….ohtheer posters agree, and OP then goes off on rant on said posters for agreeing with her that said BF is an ahole….sorry I am late to the party ..

    OP - you are dating a broscientist get used to it or dump the douche...

    I am sure he loves kittens and the Lion King.
  • DopeItUp
    DopeItUp Posts: 18,771 Member
    Apology accepted.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    Just break up.
    This.
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member
    Re spot loss. Its difficult to prove that spot reduction doesn't work - its like saying prove green fairies don't live at the bottom of your garden :-) Clever science type people guess that you can't based on the way they understand the way the body works though.

    Spot reduction absolutely does happen. It's just doesn't usually happen to the spots you are trying to reduce.
  • bearkisses
    bearkisses Posts: 1,252 Member
    he's an idiot
  • AABru
    AABru Posts: 610 Member
    Ummm...so although I enjoy the snarky comments, in this case they aren't helpful in solving your problem. My husband doesn't want me to lift, and I have lifted for LOONNNGGGG before I met him. We do not workout together unless we are cross training, and he actually comes to me for advice on weightlifting. For a long time I was stronger than he (and then we got pregnant, and ironically I drop muscle as fast as I put it on).

    Soooo anyway, totally see where you are coming from OP. I also suggest starting with Strong lifts if you have a gym membership. Start with light weights and perfect your form. There is a forum here on MFP for SL and the ladies are uber helpful.

    Still fighting the urge to be snarky...but I think I hear your boyfriend calling, he wants you to make his sandwich...:wink:
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,407 Member
    Maybe you need to pull up your panties and figure things out for yourself instead of relying on others? Just an idea.
  • Marcia315
    Marcia315 Posts: 460 Member
    I hope he's cute....
  • uconnwinsnc
    uconnwinsnc Posts: 1,054 Member
    Sounds like a charming young man.
  • chrisdavey
    chrisdavey Posts: 9,834 Member
    you should probably ask some other random buff dude at the gym. I think your BF may be more inclined to help you then.
  • jonnythan
    jonnythan Posts: 10,161 Member
    Just break up.

    Atta girl.
  • JaniePapageorgio
    JaniePapageorgio Posts: 142 Member
    Sounds like you have a girlfriend.

    Happy lifting!

    Thiiiiiiiiis. Only if he were actually a woman he might know what it's like for you trying to get toned.
  • jeffpettis
    jeffpettis Posts: 865 Member
    Sounds like you have a girlfriend.


    ...that doesn't know anything about lifting.

    So he goes to the gym once a month, thinks you can do some crunches and get a flat stomach, and sounds like a total douche bag, and you still want to take advice on proper form from him??? :huh:
  • NRSPAM
    NRSPAM Posts: 961 Member
    You're not dating Nutellabrah, are you? :huh:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :drinker:
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    did OP rage quit yet?
  • uconnwinsnc
    uconnwinsnc Posts: 1,054 Member
    did OP rage quit yet?

    It is called passion quitting, not rage quitting. C'mon now, there is a difference! Passion quitting is when you rant about someone you're dating, everyone tells you to break up with said person, and then you come back screaming about how much you love said person.
  • helpfit101
    helpfit101 Posts: 347 Member
    So you're broke and you're a whiny little ... And your bf puts up with you anyway. Because you're curvy and look hot?

    Ok just so I have the background straight.

    Google / Youtube some videos on weightlifting is the best advice he could have given you. Why don't you?

    He's right in that you might get bulkier in certain places if you were to lift. He's also right in that your boobs may shrink.

    Ya he's wrong about the crunches but don't blame him for recommending the one exercise 99% of the people in the gym do every time they go.
  • determinedbutlazy
    determinedbutlazy Posts: 1,941 Member
    You're not dating Nutellabrah, are you? :huh:

    I lol'd
  • rickyll
    rickyll Posts: 188 Member
    maybe he's scared cuz you'll be kicking his *kitten* soon. Sounds to be like he's intimidated by strength in a woman.
    Relationships work when both people are on the same page. Get him on yours!

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