my son took down a bully today

DjinnMarie

My son, 8 years old, has been having issues with a particular kid all year. There have been 4 instances so far, with today being the 5th. The 4th incident is when the kid kept pushing him off the playground equipment. My son went to find the person who was supposed to be supervising recess. He couldnt find her, and the entire time the kid was following him around punching him in the back and pushing him, leaving my kid in tears. I raised hell, was told the staff were between shift change, it wouldnt happen again, and the kid was given a referral and made to sit out recess the next day.

Today, basically the same thing happened again. And yet again, the person who was supposed to be surpervising was in the bathroom. According to the principal, my kid and I quote "grabbed him around the neck and took him down". He was given a referral, which was expected, but she wanted to make sure I was going to punish him. I informed her that I certainly would NOT punish him for defending himself. And that if her staff were where they were supposed to be, we wouldnt be having this discussion. She seemed shocked, informed me that of I wont punish him, then they would make him miss recess. And that they dont condone using violence in response to violence. Then she gave me a veiled threat insinuating that a call to CPS may be warranted. I just responded with, "do what you feel is appropriate, as will I" and walked out.

High five son.... high five...

Now Im waiting for a call from CPS. Or do they just show up?? I guess I better pick up the house.

JnK619

Typical! They always catch the retaliation!

howcanthatbetakenalready

Good for you for teaching coping skills!


His reaction isn't the appropriate 1st reaction.

But in this case it was entirely appropriate.


I assume you will have to prepare yourself for the barrage of folks bashing you for being a horrible person but they can go pound sand

cmriverside

:indifferent:

just_Jennie1

:drinker:

Good for your son for finally taking matters into his own hands when he obviously saw no one else was going to do something about it. And shame on the school for taking the position they did.

DJMIKEY1

That's the problem with this country, YOU are in the wrong if you try to defend yourself.

Kudos to your kiddo.

DjinnMarie

Typical! They always catch the retaliation!

The other kid got a referral too, and has to miss recess tomorrow. Im sure he is very broken up about it. SMH.

I remember in my day, even in grammar school, hitting someone was automatic suspension. Not this miss recess crap.

Commander_Keen

Koodo's and shame..
Its a shame that maybe if your son laid him out earlier, there would have never been a 1st or 2nd time.

Did you ask the Principle why there wasn't a replacement for the person who had to take a crap..

Danni3ll3

As a retired principal, there is no excuse for leaving children unsupervised. There should be more than one staff member on duty. What are they going to do if there is an emergency on the playground? Someone needs to be thinking this through.

As to your son, I don't condone violence but he did try to do the right thing first by getting a supervisor. Hopefully the bully will now leave him alone.

jesseg1989

That's the problem with this country, YOU are in the wrong if you try to defend yourself.

Kudos to your kiddo.

^This

DjinnMarie

Koodo's and shame..
Its a shame that maybe if your son laid him out earlier, there would have never been a 1st or 2nd time.

Did you ask the Principle why there wasn't a replacement for the person who had to take a crap..

I was told the staff member would be disciplined.

ottermotorcycle

:drinker: Kudos to your kid and to you!! It's clear you're taking care of him so the principal can do whatever her warped mind thinks is okay.

Sinisterly

Your son rocks. That's all.

ironanimal

Well, that's how I stopped the bullying I used to endure and it worked for my brother as well. Going to teachers etc. was always an exercise in futility. Kudos to you I say.

brewji

Give your son a high five!

I didn't fight back until 12th grade...wish I did it the very first, and EVERY time after that. Would have avoided countless concussions and years of depression.

kbmnurse

Nice job kid! Tell CPS to go to hell. Why would she report u to CPS anyway? You did not abuse or mistreat your child.

molonlabe762

That's the problem with this country, YOU are in the wrong if you try to defend yourself.

Kudos to your kiddo.

I agree..too many sheep

prattiger65

When will these pinheads learn that going to "tell" only makes it worse.......this infuriates me. Kudos to your boy!!!! Tell him that an old redneck from Alabama thinks he is a rockstar today!! I tell my 9yo that he is to never, ever start a fight but if provoked to fight with all he has and only stop when physically pulled off the bully. And then to promise the bully another one if he ever tries it again.

Myhaloslipped

Good or him! My mother always told me never to start something, but I should definitely finish it if someone else starts it. She also told me that I wouldn't be in trouble at home if I wasn't the instigator.

Myhaloslipped

*for

DjinnMarie

Nice job kid! Tell CPS to go to hell. Why would she report u to CPS anyway? You did not abuse or mistreat your child.

From what I hear, which is pure rumor, she is an anti war protestor type. My husband is deployed and is due back in March. When I talked to her today, the first thong she said was "I know he is excited about his father.coming home soon, he told me about it during lunch, but he and another kid....(finish story)". Which I found odd. My husband returning feom afghanistan has nothing to do with what happened. Imstill scratching my head about it. Maybe she thinks we promote violence in our house.

LVCeltGirl

Kudos! I actually like to have the CPS number handy (although I've disciplined my 8 year son correctly and would no longer need it because I just have to use the "look") for those times in a store where if I swatted my child on his butt (once) that someone would have tried to claim child abuse. Takes a lot of steam out of the threat that way.

Based on the facts as seen, you son did right when all peaceful avenues were exhausted.

Capt_Inzane

I have an 11 year old daughter and when she was around that age right before spring break she got in trouble for teasing a kid on the bus. Now she didn't say anything to us during the entire spring break and after spring break I got a call from the principal apologizing that they didn't call sooner and explained the entire thing in detail.

When my daughter got home I asked her if anything had happened that she wanted to talk about and she kept saying no. Then I proceeded to call her names, push her, grabbing her(before people get carried away I wasn't hurting her just forcefully pushing her down on the couch). Obviously she was crying and screamed "why are you bullying me?" then I stopped and explained that the principal called and that was exactly what she had said/done to the little boy on the bus. She promptly was sent to her room and to write an apology to the boy in question and the bus driver. The next morning I accompanied her onto her bus and had her hand the letters over and publicly apologize to the boy.

My daughter 3 years later still remembers that and hopefully she will for the rest of her life. I've advised my children to never bully someone and always try to be a friend and if a bully is harassing them seek an adult and if the adult doesn't handle it they have full reign to do anything they can to stop them.


If my son (he's only 4 now) had done what yours did (waited numerous times, tried seeking an adult, then handled the issue) I'd be giving him ice-cream, hell I'd tell the principal he wouldn't be going to school the next day as it'd be a celebration day. I think your son is a hero and would treat him as such!!

WoodChuckNorris

Your kid will remember that incident forever.

CallMeCupcakeDammit

Your son rocks. That's all.

I'm with her!

howcanthatbetakenalready

I'll go ahead and say it and take this into the "OH NO" direction of discussion.

IMO if parents would teach more coping skills, including how to deal with bullies themselves there wouldn't be so many suicides due to bullying.
Sorry but bullying has been going on FOREVER. And getting picked on is no reason to kill yourself.

DjinnMarie

When will these pinheads learn that going to "tell" only makes it worse.......this infuriates me. Kudos to your boy!!!! Tell him that an old redneck from Alabama thinks he is a rockstar today!! I tell my 9yo that he is to never, ever start a fight but if provoked to fight with all he has and only stop when physically pulled off the bully. And then to promise the bully another one if he ever tries it again.

I told him the last time to NEVER let somebody beat on him. If he cant find help and the kid wont stop, to fight back. And explained its his job to end the confrontation, not beat him up, if he can help it. That was a month ago. Im surprised it took this long.

socajam

My son, 8 years old, has been having issues with a particular kid all year. There have been 4 instances so far, with today being the 5th. The 4th incident is when the kid kept pushing him off the playground equipment. My son went to find the person who was supposed to be supervising recess. He couldnt find her, and the entire time the kid was following him around punching him in the back and pushing him, leaving my kid in tears. I raised hell, was told the staff were between shift change, it wouldnt happen again, and the kid was given a referral and made to sit out recess the next day.

Today, basically the same thing happened again. And yet again, the person who was supposed to be surpervising was in the bathroom. According to the principal, my kid and I quote "grabbed him around the neck and took him down". He was given a referral, which was expected, but she wanted to make sure I was going to punish him. I informed her that I certainly would NOT punish him for defending himself. And that if her staff were where they were supposed to be, we wouldnt be having this discussion. She seemed shocked, informed me that of I wont punish him, then they would make him miss recess. And that they dont condone using violence in response to violence. Then she gave me a veiled threat insinuating that a call to CPS may be warranted. I just responded with, "do what you feel is appropriate, as will I" and walked out.

High five son.... high five...

Now Im waiting for a call from CPS. Or do they just show up?? I guess I better pick up the house.

Get your son enrolled in self-defense, tae kwon do or karate lessons now so that he has the self confidence to defend himself. Tell him next time someone hits him do not even tell the teacher, hit them so hard that there will not be a next time, yes he will get into trouble, but guess what, the bully will know that he is off limits. Also tell him that a bully is nothing but a coward.

socajam

When will these pinheads learn that going to "tell" only makes it worse.......this infuriates me. Kudos to your boy!!!! Tell him that an old redneck from Alabama thinks he is a rockstar today!! I tell my 9yo that he is to never, ever start a fight but if provoked to fight with all he has and only stop when physically pulled off the bully. And then to promise the bully another one if he ever tries it again.

Totally agree with you. Hit them so hard, that they will never attempt to bully anyone else.

I am sick to death of school officials not taking bullying seriously.

DjinnMarie

I'll go ahead and say it and take this into the "OH NO" direction of discussion.

IMO if parents would teach more coping skills, including how to deal with bullies themselves there wouldn't be so many suicides due to bullying.
Sorry but bullying has been going on FOREVER. And getting picked on is no reason to kill yourself.

Some kids just arent that way. Im very surprised my son fought back. He is such an empthetic child. I could.never see him hitting anyone, evenif they deserve it. Which is why he is probably getting picked on in the first place. Dumb mive on the part of the bully. My son is a big stocky boy, and shockingly strong. Much bigger than this bully.

I also wanted to add. Bullying is much different now than when were kids. Especially in highschool. A rumor whichbused to take a week to circulate the school, now takes seconds, thanks to texting a facebook. And it doesnt end when the school bell rings. Add to that the ability to say hateful things while hiding behind a keyboard, its a recipe for disaster. Kids are.committing suicide over relentless verbal and emotional torture, not physical.

Jersey_Devil

the schools just protecting its own *kitten* by trying to place the blame on you. You can always contact the media to try to hold the school accountable.