Men, how do you feel about SAHM?
Options
Replies
-
Do you pay for child care? Are you aware of the cost of child care? Not everyone can have a family member watch their child AND work.I have a strong opinion on this, so let's see where it gets me.
Being a young mother and a single mom, I worked to support my son and myself. I knew and still see many, many young women who have "stay at home mom' as their job title on facebook or whatever other social media. That's not a job, that's parenting. A job is what I do 8-10 hours a day and then come home and do all the things you do but in a couple hours.
The part that bothers me is people who have a stay at home parent who utilize government assistance. To me, being a stay at home parent is a luxury. You shouldn't qualify for government assistance when you CHOOSE not to work. I'm ashamed to say that I know of at least 10 young mothers who consider 'stay at home' parenting a job and collect welfare to supplement their lack of income.
You don't get to call the shots on who deserves assistance and who doesn't. I'll bet money you're exaggerating on all of these young moms who live the high life on welfare.
Yes, I have paid for child care since my son was 6 weeks old. Thankfully he's in school now so I pay less. Do most states not have childcare vouchers for working parents? I know my state does and that's something I would support. Parents are more likely to better their financial situation and get off of assistance by working, as opposed to making it a career. In all honesty, I could probably think of over 20 young women who stay at home by choice, if I took the time.
So if I were to say that I would rather stay at home with my child (which I would), guit my job and go on government assistance for 18 years, you think that's ok? What if every mother did the same, would we have to enact a law that provided income to stay at home parents?
Fun Fact: it's no one's business that someone else gets assistance for "staying home by choice"
when the public contributes to said assistance, then yes, it is.
you honestly think youre entitled to stay home and collect because childcare is expensive?
i would feel a tremendous amount of guilt if i did that.
Jinx0 -
More power to all the SAHM/Ds. I wouldn't trade my life for any other... because I make it what I want it to be. I'm a single parent and have been since I was 2 months pregnant. That is never likely to change, so staying home to raise my kids is not an option without starting my own business (I'm not in a field or economic area that could support that without many years of a significant lack of funds to keep my current bills paid) or without being on several modes of government assistance. I have had the options to be with someone out of convenience rather than love and I could never make the choice to do that to be a SAHM. I have been offered the security of SAHM-hood but it is my personal opinion and belief that I should work for as much as I can achieve and be a mother at the same time. Would I give up my career and put all my hopes and dreams into someone who is only offering me convenience and not true parental love for my kids? Nope.0
-
when the public contributes to said assistance, then yes, it is.
you honestly think youre entitled to stay home and collect because childcare is expensive?
i would feel a tremendous amount of guilt if i did that.
Just my two cents, I'm not on assistance and am quite aware of the problems with it. It frustrates me when people feel entitled and take advantage of the system. BUT...the job I was talking about in my previous comment paid about $13/hour and I bought home EXACTLY enough to pay for my two daughters to go to daycare. Not sure what I would've done had I been single because hubby supported us totally, and I won't judge those who are in that position.
*ETA: I guess there's childcare assistance out there. Again, I have no clue what being in that position looks like and won't make judgements on it. I agree that people take advantage of the system but seriously...how did we even get on this topic? Obama equates the GI Bill to welfare and now SAHMs are all living off welfare too? :laugh:0 -
when the public contributes to said assistance, then yes, it is.
you honestly think youre entitled to stay home and collect because childcare is expensive?
i would feel a tremendous amount of guilt if i did that.
Just my two cents, I'm not on assistance and am quite aware of the problems with it. It frustrates me when people feel entitled and take advantage of the system. BUT...the job I was talking about in my previous comment paid about $13/hour and I bought home EXACTLY enough to pay for my two daughters to go to daycare. Not sure what I would've done had I been single because hubby supported us totally, and I won't judge those who are in that position.
Just because you started at $13 an hour doesn't mean you will stay there. That is no reason to quit your job and live off the government. Doing so only ensures continued dependence. If you were a single mom, you would get subsidized child care.0 -
I have been a SAHM for 12 years now.. but Have always worked from home doing various business ventures. I will add I have five kids and having a job outside the house would be impossible with childcare costs etc. I CHOOSE to have five kids.. and i believe in making that choice it would have not made sense for me to CHOOSE to have a job outside the home. If i wanted to have a job outside the home i would have CHOSEN to have less children.
I don't think people can compare each others situation and determine which is harder. Everybodys situations are different and by that I mean, relationship status, Children (characteristics) , family situations (grandparents etc around to help), finances etc.
I find these arguments and question so stupid. its like the moms who compare there kids etc.. who bloody well cares when your child was reading, or how many sports, or when they lost there teeth.. point is, we are all different, we all strive to do whats best for us and our families and everyones BEST is different. Thats what makes the world an exciting place. I think the real issue in parenting and motherhood etc is the relationships we have with our family as a whole.
Am i saying I love being a stay at home mom.. no, not always, sometimes yes. I feel lost in it, i feel lost in my kids, I feel that sometimes my value is determined by my children and thats a WHOLE other issue. Threads like this are really stupid.. and they are started by people who don't have a clue and perhaps think that we all function the same way. WE DON'T!!!
NOW I NEED A CAT GIF TO MAKE ME LAUGH AGAIN.. ANYONE ANYONE?
YES!!!!! I am a SAHM and have been off and on for a few years. Last time I went back to work, my kids grades dropped and they both started getting in trouble at school. My husband and I both worked an hour away from home and my husband was also going to school full time. It just made more sense for me to quit my job and stay home. Since I have been home with them, they both get straight A's and we aren't having to worry about If they are ok. Plus, my kids go to year-round school, so they are almost always home.
I did finish school and have 3 degrees in clinical research. Did I aspire to stay at home and take care of my kids and husband... NO! However, this is what works for my family. I am happiest knowing my family is happy, healthy and my kids are succeeding. If that means you don't like me or think I am wasting my life... GREAT!0 -
I could go into detail about corporations benefiting more from taxes than single moms cheating the system and getting a handout. I'm pretty sure it was also our tax dollars that fund wars, and all of that other political crap I really shouldn't get into. It's called being an adult. People pay taxes, regardless if they want to or not. (I mean, another example is that the streets aren't magically plowed by snow angels in the winter)
I also like to not assume what other people are doing because, you know, I have my own stuff I need to worry about.0 -
I could go into detail about corporations benefiting more from taxes than single moms cheating the system and getting a handout. I'm pretty sure it was also our tax dollars that fund wars, and all of that other political crap I really shouldn't get into. It's called being an adult. People pay taxes, regardless if they want to or not. (I mean, another example is that the streets aren't magically plowed by snow angels in the winter)
I also like to not assume what other people are doing because, you know, I have my own stuff I need to worry about.
You have a say in where your tax dollars go, its called voting.0 -
Oh, I forgot I get to pick and choose where my own tax dollars go. Damn, I must have missed that at the booths.
You have a say in where your tax dollars go, its called voting.0 -
Oh, I forgot I get to pick and choose where my own tax dollars go. Damn, I must have missed that at the booths.
You have a say in where your tax dollars go, its called voting.
Dont be daft. In your case, you vote for somebody like nancy pelosi.0 -
who else interpreted this as S&M lol?0
-
"It's ok to steal from working families because corporations do it", what a wonderful nugget of knowledge from a person struggling to survive off the bare minimum. If bare minimum means having an iPhone with a data plan, a fitbit, treadmill and more recent cliché ink than a 20 year sailor.I could go into detail about corporations benefiting more from taxes than single moms cheating the system and getting a handout. I'm pretty sure it was also our tax dollars that fund wars, and all of that other political crap I really shouldn't get into. It's called being an adult. People pay taxes, regardless if they want to or not. (I mean, another example is that the streets aren't magically plowed by snow angels in the winter)
I also like to not assume what other people are doing because, you know, I have my own stuff I need to worry about.
I love how you call "paying taxes" a fact of being an adult. When do you plan on growing up and becoming an adult like the rest of us you live so well off of?0 -
I was waiting for this to escalate into political mud-slinging......Some people really hate the poor these days, eh?0
-
"It's ok to steal from working families because corporations do it", what a wonderful nugget of knowledge from a person struggling to survive off the bare minimum. If bare minimum means having an iPhone with a data plan, a fitbit, treadmill and more recent cliché ink than a 20 year sailor.I could go into detail about corporations benefiting more from taxes than single moms cheating the system and getting a handout. I'm pretty sure it was also our tax dollars that fund wars, and all of that other political crap I really shouldn't get into. It's called being an adult. People pay taxes, regardless if they want to or not. (I mean, another example is that the streets aren't magically plowed by snow angels in the winter)
I also like to not assume what other people are doing because, you know, I have my own stuff I need to worry about.
I love how you call "paying taxes" a fact of being an adult. When do you plan on growing up and becoming an adult like the rest of us you live so well off of?
:flowerforyou:0 -
You couldn't pay me to answer this honestly.0
-
Well, I have experienced the best of both worlds. I was a single working woman with no kids working at an entry-level job. Then, I was a working single mom of a child with autism, who went to daycare, while I went to school on my off days. Then, I became a SAHM in 2010. My son goes to a private autistic school, out of district and I am the only one available to walk him to the bus stop in the mornings and get him off the bus, when he gets home from school. My son is also still in diapers and requires constant supervision. Anyhow, I also go to school full-time online.
I love being a SAHM although it can be very challenging, plus with the way my son's school schedule is, having two weeks off in the summer and being off on holidays and stuff, I don't know any employer who would tolerate me staying home for two different weeks every single summer. My son is 6 years old and non-verbal, so while there are daycares around here, they are expensive and they are not equipped to handle or work with autistic children. So, for right now, this is how it's going to be for us.0 -
You couldn't pay me to answer this honestly.
We don't pay trolls.0 -
"It's ok to steal from working families because corporations do it", what a wonderful nugget of knowledge from a person struggling to survive off the bare minimum. If bare minimum means having an iPhone with a data plan, a fitbit, treadmill and more recent cliché ink than a 20 year sailor.I could go into detail about corporations benefiting more from taxes than single moms cheating the system and getting a handout. I'm pretty sure it was also our tax dollars that fund wars, and all of that other political crap I really shouldn't get into. It's called being an adult. People pay taxes, regardless if they want to or not. (I mean, another example is that the streets aren't magically plowed by snow angels in the winter)
I also like to not assume what other people are doing because, you know, I have my own stuff I need to worry about.
I love how you call "paying taxes" a fact of being an adult. When do you plan on growing up and becoming an adult like the rest of us you live so well off of?
Did I miss something? I thought she said she works and puts her child in daycare? Where did she say she is surviving on the bare minimum, has all those things you listed, and lives off of your tax dollars?0 -
I just hate lazy people. Rich or poor don't matter to me.I was waiting for this to escalate into political mud-slinging......Some people really hate the poor these days, eh?
I also hate Butterfingers. They are too sticky in my teeth. Each bite ensures a new cavity.0 -
You couldn't pay me to answer this honestly.
We don't pay trolls.
This would be an excellent time for an always sunny gif "you gotta pay the troll toll to get into this boy's hole..", but I am not posting it because I am not a troll. Furthermore, I actually like you. So ouch
0 -
I just hate lazy people. Rich or poor don't matter to me.I was waiting for this to escalate into political mud-slinging......Some people really hate the poor these days, eh?
I also hate Butterfingers. They are to sticky in my teeth. Each bite ensures a new cavity.
So how is it like being a pregnant man who cheated on his hubby with a black man? Is it all sunshine and butterflies?0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 392.1K Introduce Yourself
- 43.6K Getting Started
- 259.9K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.7K Food and Nutrition
- 47.4K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 403 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.8K Motivation and Support
- 7.9K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.4K MyFitnessPal Information
- 23 News and Announcements
- 999 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.4K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions