Frustrated.......need encouragement

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Not sure if this is where I need to post or not. Sometimes I think there's not the right 'fit' for a post on any particular board........


I've been at this weit loss thing for almost 3 years. I've come a. VERY long way since then. I've had my struggles and my successes. People used to always ask me how I was doing it, until I hit a 50 lb loss. Not sure if it's because it's taken so long for me to drop the weight or what. I've done various things in my 3 years. One of which, is running. I love to run now. At least I did encore it got cold. I can't do treadmills. Between cold, snow, and several life altering things, exercise has been on the back burner since Halloween. I can tell my body comp has changed a ton. I'm not as toned, my belly is more jello-y. Even though I've dropped another size I'm still not comfortable with my body comp. recently Ive struggled with my ultimate goal weight and what it should be. People are asking again if I've lost since the school year started, and it think it's been around 15 lbs, but it's taken me since October to lose 9 of those lbs.

I'm just frustrated and down on myself and need some unbiased input, since hubby swears I'm thin enough and my mom thinks I'm at a good weight. Not sure if I need to concentrate on body comp or keep losing. Please, no criticism, I don't need it right now, I'm in a bad enough place. Below is 2 sets of pics. One is my SW with a current pic the other is same outfit, October and today. Does it look like I'm still losing? Al I see if the fat girl I started as. Thoughts on UGW?

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Replies

  • Cristlefir
    Cristlefir Posts: 67 Member
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    Hi there!

    First of all, you look beautiful! You have absolutely lost weight since October and it's noticeable. You've made such a dramatic change from your 2011 photos too! Really, you've achieved quite a bit! Be proud!

    I know exactly how you feel right now, and I've been stuck where you're at too. Once winter hit, I was a goner. I live in MA and this snow and cold is never ending, it seems. I went from working out a ton to slowly napping more and more after work. Suddenly I wasn't doing anything at all and I was obsessed with what I wasn't doing. I started having the same body comp issues, seeing whatever toned parts start to turn back into fat.

    I made a decision two days ago that I wasn't going to regain the ten pounds I've lost over the past two months, and, winter or not, I had to start getting back into it. Last year I lost 17 pounds and was a decent 137lbs, then gained it all back! I do not want to go through that stress again! But the last couple months have been a huge struggle. I've completely stressed over my lack of working out and it really felt like I was hitting my head against the wall.

    A few questions: What is your goal weight and have you reached it? Do you take measurements, or do you just look at the scale? Are YOU happy with how you look? (That's important, because it's not about what other people think!)

    Anyway, I think there is a visible change in your body, and you look great!
  • vwallrn
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    I agree you look fantastic! And yes, there is a visible difference from October, your mid section is clearly smaller.
    You look really healthy at this point. As such, I recommend focusing more on measurements and body composition. Once someone is at a healthy point body weight, you may actually start gaining weight, even though you're shrinking because you're gaining more muscle than losing fat (muscle weighs considerably more than fat). Also, try not to get too hung up on numbers because everyone's body as a different set point - a weight that your body is naturally comfortable at. If you set a weight lower than that, you'll just frustrate yourself.
    Either way, I just wanted today, you've done an amazing job. It is exceptionally hard work to not only lose, but keep weight off. Particularly when you're busy with work, kids, marriage and god knows what else. Try not to get down on yourself and give your soul the kindness you deserve for the long way you've come. Congratulations, you're very inspiring.
  • mimieon
    mimieon Posts: 182 Member
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    Congratulations on your accomplishments! You look great :).

    I would consider focusing more on fitness related goals now, rather than pounds to lose. I think it may help how you feel about yourself and this process.

    If you want to know where you're at fat-wise, maybe consider having someone take body comp/fat percentage measures for you. Then you can work on that. (And don't worry about how fast/slow you are doing things, focus on feeling good about yourself while doing it, though I know that is hard sometimes)

    edit to add: PS. I can definitely see a difference in those photos
  • lizcraft
    lizcraft Posts: 35 Member
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    First thing is first..Congrats...You are beautiful. You have come so far in your journey and I am so proud of you. The two main areas that I see a change in is the chest area and the stomach area. Both have become smaller. You have done an amazing job with your weight loss and I would love to be your size...and I will be one day...But you need to give yourself credit for all that you have accomplished and stay on track for yourself and not get discouraged. If you are not happy with yourself then keep going. But if you are happy now with what you look like and your size then do a bit more to become happy. I wish you all the luck in the rest of your journey. You will get this done and be happy with yourself.
  • TinekeVanDerKwaak
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    People make it seem very easy to lose weight. Just stop eating right? It is not easy. What you had to do was hard work. And you look beautiful. Be proud of yourself, I feel proud of you when I read your story and it is not even my accomplishment. You look great, I can see a real difference in the photos! Good job!!
  • TheKeithEllis
    TheKeithEllis Posts: 155 Member
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    You're looking great, seriously, don't fret it - just keep on keeping on. :O)
  • IrishGabriella
    IrishGabriella Posts: 48 Member
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    I think you lost that 9 lbs since October from your tummy and a little from your bust! You can definitely see the difference in your two last pics. Seriously you look a perfect weight to me & I'm sure loads of us on here would love to look like you!

    If you feel you're not happy with yourself, perhaps it's not really about your weight & you need to go for some counselling. You sound like you're feeling very down.
  • knra_grl
    knra_grl Posts: 1,568 Member
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    You do look great! How do you feel about where you are at? Maybe you need to try something different from running so that in the winter months you can continue your healthy lifestyle. Change is always good and you might find something you love to do. When the snow is gone you can resume your running for cardio.
  • Motivated1234789
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    Hi there. You can tell you've lost a lot of weight all over. Congrats! your latest pics I notice it in your face. Keep doing what you're doing cause it's working for you. Stay positive!
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
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    Hi there!

    First of all, you look beautiful! You have absolutely lost weight since October and it's noticeable. You've made such a dramatic change from your 2011 photos too! Really, you've achieved quite a bit! Be proud!

    I know exactly how you feel right now, and I've been stuck where you're at too. Once winter hit, I was a goner. I live in MA and this snow and cold is never ending, it seems. I went from working out a ton to slowly napping more and more after work. Suddenly I wasn't doing anything at all and I was obsessed with what I wasn't doing. I started having the same body comp issues, seeing whatever toned parts start to turn back into fat.

    I made a decision two days ago that I wasn't going to regain the ten pounds I've lost over the past two months, and, winter or not, I had to start getting back into it. Last year I lost 17 pounds and was a decent 137lbs, then gained it all back! I do not want to go through that stress again! But the last couple months have been a huge struggle. I've completely stressed over my lack of working out and it really felt like I was hitting my head against the wall.

    A few questions: What is your goal weight and have you reached it? Do you take measurements, or do you just look at the scale? Are YOU happy with how you look? (That's important, because it's not about what other people think!)

    Anyway, I think there is a visible change in your body, and you look great!


    Thanks, your post REALLY helped...... My goal is 145, my lowest is 158 so far. I haven't been in the 150's in almost 13 years so it feels good to be here. Just looks a hell of a lot different than it did 75 lbs and 2 kids ago. Since I don't workout consistently right now, I only take measurements once a month. And I think the only way I will be happy with how I look is a tummy tuck, lipo on my inner thighs and breast augmentation- everything on this poor body has headed south, and not just for the winter!
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
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    I agree you look fantastic! And yes, there is a visible difference from October, your mid section is clearly smaller.
    You look really healthy at this point. As such, I recommend focusing more on measurements and body composition. Once someone is at a healthy point body weight, you may actually start gaining weight, even though you're shrinking because you're gaining more muscle than losing fat (muscle weighs considerably more than fat). Also, try not to get too hung up on numbers because everyone's body as a different set point - a weight that your body is naturally comfortable at. If you set a weight lower than that, you'll just frustrate yourself.
    Either way, I just wanted today, you've done an amazing job. It is exceptionally hard work to not only lose, but keep weight off. Particularly when you're busy with work, kids, marriage and god knows what else. Try not to get down on yourself and give your soul the kindness you deserve for the long way you've come. Congratulations, you're very inspiring.

    Thank you. Quick question- how do I know what my body's set point is at??
  • dapagu2004
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    You look amazing now! What an achievement! Think about it. There is not rush to lose those last pounds, is there? They are the hardest to lose! I know Jillian Michaels has a book on losing the last 10-20 pounds. I havent read it though I am planning to when I get to that place.
    Good luck!
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
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    People make it seem very easy to lose weight. Just stop eating right? It is not easy. What you had to do was hard work. And you look beautiful. Be proud of yourself, I feel proud of you when I read your story and it is not even my accomplishment. You look great, I can see a real difference in the photos! Good job!!


    Thank you :smile:
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
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    You do look great! How do you feel about where you are at? Maybe you need to try something different from running so that in the winter months you can continue your healthy lifestyle. Change is always good and you might find something you love to do. When the snow is gone you can resume your running for cardio.

    I have always hated exercise.........apparently that's how I got here in the first place, lol. I find it hard to find something I enjoy and stick with it.......
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
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    You look amazing now! What an achievement! Think about it. There is not rush to lose those last pounds, is there? They are the hardest to lose! I know Jillian Michaels has a book on losing the last 10-20 pounds. I havent read it though I am planning to when I get to that place.
    Good luck!

    I like her, wish my knees could handle her workouts!! She's a killer. I will have to look in to that book!!
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
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    I do want to add- I've read a lot on body dysmorphia over the years and I wonder just how long it will take my brain to catch up with my body. I know it takes awhile, and I thought with slower weight loss maybe my brain would adjust a bit easier. I'm thinkin not.
  • dianesheart88
    dianesheart88 Posts: 111 Member
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    I just want to say you look AMAZING! I can see what I may look like once I hit my goal weight, because I weigh what you started at and my goal is your current weight. Your inspiring! Sometimes when people lose weight they have a hard time seeing themselves without all the weight - meaning your body image. You've accomplished so much and have so much to be proud of!
    Hang in there and BE PROUD!!
  • rhodieridge13
    rhodieridge13 Posts: 20 Member
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    You look fab, keep up the good work. Try to keep negativity out of your vocabulary. You can def. tell the difference in the pics.
  • Meredith8684
    Meredith8684 Posts: 681 Member
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    First, you look awesome! I think it's hard to be subjective about our own appearance. I feel like we're in a similar place. Lost a lot of weight quickly, and then we've been plateauing/losing slowly during the winter. I think some of that is natural. It gets darker earlier, so I usually settle down earlier. Even if it's just puttering around the house, settling down three hours earlier is a lot fewer calories burnt every day. Also, losing those runs makes a difference! I think you're doing really well, and that you might find that spring gives you a bit of a boost, I know that the season changes how I feel.

    I would suggest that you check out winter running. I didn't think I'd like it, but with a few extra clothes I'm really enjoying myself. I have running tights (Walmart, about $8), long sleeved running shirt, then I wear a t-shirt and either a light running coat or a sweatshirt. I also have a fleece headband and neck scarf, as well as running gloves. I bought these at sierra trading post really cheaply. I've found that I can go running until it's about 10 degrees F really comfortably. It's chilly at first, but then it feels really good. If it's below 10 degrees I wear a face mask too.

    If you're interested in changing your body composition, maybe check out weight lifting. I find it to be really fun. It's a great way to look better regardless of weight loss.

    Whatever you do, you look really good, and incredibly healthy. Take a moment to celebrate your progress!
  • ProgressNotPerfection32
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    I just want to say you look AMAZING! I can see what I may look like once I hit my goal weight, because I weigh what you started at and my goal is your current weight. Your inspiring! Sometimes when people lose weight they have a hard time seeing themselves without all the weight - meaning your body image. You've accomplished so much and have so much to be proud of!
    Hang in there and BE PROUD!!

    Thanks! Good luck to you!! How tall are you?