Can't stop bingeing and hate myself :(

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I keep trying to keep up with myfitness pal and I had lost just over 9lb but then something happens and I start bingeing and then I have triouble stopping :( I really hate the way I look and am and yet even that doesn't inspire me to carry on :(

I went to the docs and said I had a problem with food and wish something drastic would happen to force me to change my eating habits like getting a life threatening disease (please don't hate me for thinking like this I was jus so desperate) but he just offered to up my anti-depressants :(

I keep reading about people who have lost a lot of weight and wish I could do the same but I just don't seem to be able to - I guess I'm lazy.???

Can anyone please HELP as I just can't seem to help myself and even when I turn to the professionals they just don't seem bothered :(

I've got three beautiful children and a loving husband and so want to get back to being fit and healthy and looking better for it but something inside just won't seem to let me :(
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Replies

  • Beckilovespizza
    Beckilovespizza Posts: 334 Member
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    I'm really sorry you feel this way. Maybe give the antidepressants a few weeks to kick in and weather permitting try to takes some walks. Fresh air and exercise will work wonders for your low mood and you will clock up a few calories as a bonus. I wish I could help you further, best of luck.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    I highly suggest you read this:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants


    In short, log everyday. Weigh your food.

    You don't have to cut out anything or be super restrictive. You can still eat all of your favorite foods, but fit them into your calorie goal. If you feel your calorie goal is too low/hard to adhere to, then don't be scared to adjust it to a level you feel comfortable with. Doing these things has greatly helped me. I never binge because I get a healthy amount of calories, with the foods I crave/love.

    We can give you advice, but we can't hold your hand and make you do anything. YOU have to take control of YOU and make the changes you need to make. And speaking from experience, an illness/life threatening disease won't make you change your eating habits either. Only you can do that.
  • retrobaby
    retrobaby Posts: 613 Member
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    It sounds like you are desperate for help. You are at least doing something positive about your concern by posting and being on My fitness pal. Take a look at the WHY? you are eating, rather than what and how much you are eating.
  • starrylioness
    starrylioness Posts: 543 Member
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    I used to binge eat as well. I completely understand.

    But I've always said binging and food addictions are just that - an addiction. You have to treat it like one, especially in the beginning. You have to want to do it, just like quitting smoking, except with food it's even harder because we can take ourselves away from the presence of smokers around us but we can't take food out of our life. Makes it more difficult! But you CAN do it. I did it. I was a pasta binge eater. I could eat a whole pound of pasta by myself when I weighed 320 lbs (my heaviest) I've lost 72 lbs now.

    You just have to want to do it. You have to have focus and drive and it's not easy. It really isn't. I have PCOS and hypothyroidsim as well and I managed it. I know you can too! Just don't give up. You will make mistakes. Every day will be a new day though. Keep thinking about the good you ARE doing your body by making changes. Maybe even set a mantra of some sort to say EVERY morning. Something positive and changing for you!

    Hang in there!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    How about seeing a therapist?
  • mortuseon
    mortuseon Posts: 579 Member
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    where are you? In some places you can self-refer to psych services if that is what you need. Or you can request a referral from your GP and they may send you to someone who specialises in eating disorders who will be able to tackle your problems more readily.

    Things that help me with binges (am in recovery for bulimia):
    EATING ENOUGH. Getting into the binge-starve cycle, or the binge-starve-purge cycle, is deadly and will worsen your attacks. You might feel guilty eating properly the next day but honestly, it's damage control.

    EXERCISE. This is both an appetite suppressant (for me at least), something that keeps me busy when I could be eating, a reason to eat well (to nourish my body) and a mood booster (to prevent stress eating). Even just a 30 min walk can help.

    EAT THE RIGHT FOODS. Find foods that satiate you better. By switching to wholegrains and eating more protein, I find that I'm more satiated. You need to find the correct balance for you, but eating more veggies/foods with a low calorie density might help to fill you up. Some people find that increasing their fat intake helps.

    A POSITIVE ATTITUDE. Commit yourself to getting better! To every meal. I plan my meals whenever possible to keep myself on track and it helps to know that I'm nourishing my body. Food is not the enemy.

    Good luck. Feel free to add me and hope things start to get better soon! It's good that you have a support network at home; perhaps it would be worth discussing your problems and how you plan to tackle them with those people.
  • monkeywizard
    monkeywizard Posts: 222 Member
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    I just took a look and your diary and when you log, you seem to have a grasp on what needs to be done. I would try to find out what triggers your slide and fight that.

    I too have three kids and I know that it can be difficult, but the best way I can say to keep going is have a support system and have a plan. In the mornings I plan out my meals for the day. I have my breakfast , lunch & dinner and 3 snacks. I take all but my dinner & night snack with me and that's all I eat. See if your husband will help with planning out the meals, Maybe he can diet along with you (or if he doesn't need to lose, he can eat the same foods you are). The only way to succeed on a diet is to find one that you can sustain. If you are miserable on it you won't be happy.

    But you have to also control your slides. There are times I am in a funk and I'll want to sit down with a jar of PB and a spon and go crazy, but instead I have the PB to go (thanks Jif!) and instead of the jar I grab one of those. It'll satisfy me and won't be too much of a shot in the foot. My wife has her dessert every night and that's what keeps her going through the day. Everyone has a slip, but you have to control the slip, and more importantly, recover from it.

    We all here want you to succeed and know that you can do it! You're not alone!
  • fannyfrost
    fannyfrost Posts: 756 Member
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    A doctor won't get it. Especially if you have a male Doctor. I was a working mom, with a busy schedule and hubby barely helped with housework, I said sometimes I just wanna run away from it. He offered me antidepressants because not wanting to do housework is a sign of depression. I was Like um no just too much stuff to do.

    I understand how you feel. Your problem may be that you are trying to limit your food too much. Sometimes when you make your choices too narrow, it makes you binge because you just want the junk. Also get all the trigger foods out of the house. Don't give me the bull your kids need cookies and potato chips because they shouldn't be eating them either. Sometimes as a treat yes, but there is no need to keep in house all the time. Keep healthy snacks available, make it easier for you to have good choices.

    Also try keeping things that help curb the cravings a bit, like chocolate pudding cups, yogurt, graham crackers.

    Don't hate yourself for binging, this is hard, I have been a bit out of control for a while too. I know I can do this, but its hard, really hard and I work a lot and I am a mom with a 19yo who stresses me out and I am pretty sure I am in Perimenopause and my hormones are a mess, but I can do this. YOU can do this. Make changes slowly, not all at once. Small slow steps are easier to maintain long term, YOU CAN do this.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
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    Contact the following:

    http://eating-disorders.org.uk/

    And they should be able to help.

    If you want to try and deal with the issue yourself then "Brain Over Binge" by Kathryn Hansen or other self help books along those lines will help.

    (edited: as saw you are in the UK rather than the US)
  • Synamin
    Synamin Posts: 80 Member
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    If seeing someone who is trained in helping someone with an eating disorder is out of the question and you want to self-help yourself through this (which is the hard way to do it) then make a commitment to yourself to educate yourself on binge eating and what you can do to begin normalizing your relationship with food. Its hard work to learn about what is happening to you and changing your own behavior which is why you should probably find someone who can help.

    There are a couple of groups here on MFP to check out. There is a group for binge eaters and another for emotional eaters, both are full of very supportive people.

    Hating yourself is a waste of time. If you want something different to happen, you have to do different things.
  • kathygolean
    kathygolean Posts: 24 Member
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    Sweetheart, you are NOT alone in this! I am a binge eater from time to time as well...just gotta keep hitting restart each morning and choose TODAY will be a better day. Do you have a friend who can join you in your journey? I have more I could say, but would rather not post publicly. If you'd like, you can friend me and I'd love to at least join you in your journey via cyberspace! :)
  • tonismith15
    tonismith15 Posts: 11 Member
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    There is a group called Overeaters Anonymous. Www.oa.org. they have been my salvation. Look for a meeting in your local area. Good luck.
  • LoopsLinn
    LoopsLinn Posts: 17 Member
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    I just took a look and your diary and when you log, you seem to have a grasp on what needs to be done. I would try to find out what triggers your slide and fight that.

    The triggers that set me off on a munchie craze/binge is bread... I avoid this and craving stops. I have replacedseems bread with ryvita crisp bread. seems to really help ...... And try to get at least 6-8 glasses of water through the day too.

    Your not alone :smile:
    Linn
  • melmckay99
    melmckay99 Posts: 358
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    There is a Binge Eating Support group here on MFP:
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/726-binge-eating-support-group

    I def recommend you check it out and read through some of the other BED sufferers experiences. You are not alone. This dieting thing is great and all, hell it worked for me, but the good feelings you get from dieting and losing weight seem to have an expiry date for some...
  • NataBost
    NataBost Posts: 418 Member
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    How about seeing a therapist?

    This.
  • algwynt
    algwynt Posts: 76 Member
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    your daily target of 1280 seem,s to low.are you trying to lose to quickly.a pound a week loss target is more realistic.i binge if i get hungry.especially in the evening.so i try to spread my calories over the full day.keep filling in your diary even if you had a bad day [i notice youve missed a couple of days]and look back when you get the urge to binge to encourage yourself.remember its not going to happen overnight.
  • DuckDynastyMakesMeLaugh
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    A doctor won't get it. Especially if you have a male Doctor. I was a working mom, with a busy schedule and hubby barely helped with housework, I said sometimes I just wanna run away from it. He offered me antidepressants because not wanting to do housework is a sign of depression. I was Like um no just too much stuff to do.

    I understand how you feel. Your problem may be that you are trying to limit your food too much. Sometimes when you make your choices too narrow, it makes you binge because you just want the junk. Also get all the trigger foods out of the house. Don't give me the bull your kids need cookies and potato chips because they shouldn't be eating them either. Sometimes as a treat yes, but there is no need to keep in house all the time. Keep healthy snacks available, make it easier for you to have good choices.

    Also try keeping things that help curb the cravings a bit, like chocolate pudding cups, yogurt, graham crackers.

    Don't hate yourself for binging, this is hard, I have been a bit out of control for a while too. I know I can do this, but its hard, really hard and I work a lot and I am a mom with a 19yo who stresses me out and I am pretty sure I am in Perimenopause and my hormones are a mess, but I can do this. YOU can do this. Make changes slowly, not all at once. Small slow steps are easier to maintain long term, YOU CAN do this.

    +1
    Additionally, maybe you're experiencing post partum depression. Your hormones are still in flux….are you breast-feeding too? Wacky hormone levels are very problematic. FOR ME, the anti-depressants caused side effects that added to my list of annoyances….lack of orgasms being tops on the list! :sad:

    If you don't feel you have support from your family,,,ask for it, take time to exercise and make sure your MFP settings are providing enough calories to lessen a reason for bingeing.
  • cornucopiaoflove
    cornucopiaoflove Posts: 45 Member
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    I second this (seeing a counselor)! It can really help you figure out what is causing the binging and ways to stop it