Teenagers and random room inspections

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pawnstarNate
pawnstarNate Posts: 1,728 Member
agree or disagree?

My motive for posting this is two parts. 1. curious of your thoughts and if you let them have their privacy. 2. It was funny to me and the wife made me swear I would keep it from other relatives so, I have to share it with someone.

We do a random room inspection from time to time for our teenage boy. Last night, I did one and under the mattress, I found some rather raunchy pages from a magazine and a little stack of coffee filters. lol I called him to his room and said "I know why the pages are there but, WTH(eck) are the coffee filters for?? Even though being a teenage boy once myself, I knew the answer. He must get his quick witted replies from me because he immediately said "Oragami's!" LMAO

Anywho.....do you do random inspections or let them have their privacy?
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Replies

  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
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    Yeah... GL to my mother finding anything through the filth.
    Kept it filthy to keep her out.
  • FemmeFatale83
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    I haven't done that, but I have seen everything in my daughter's room recently b/c she agreed to let me clean it and get rid of a bunch of stuff I felt was clutter. I think she's too clever to hide something serious from me in her room. I don't think I would go through it for any other reason, but who knows, maybe I would if I thought she was in danger or something like that
  • caroldavison332
    caroldavison332 Posts: 864 Member
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    I'm 53 and don't know what the coffee filters are for. Please explain.
  • AJinBirmingham
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    I don't think there's a right or wrong blanket answer here - it depends on the teenager.
  • tenathequeena
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    I don't go through my son's room. We have an open, trusting relationship.
  • hep26000
    hep26000 Posts: 156 Member
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    I don't but I would if I thought I had a reason to. She is only 10 so maybe in a couple years. I do however go through her phone on occasion. She only texts her parents, auntie, poppa and her best friend so all good there. (BTW- for those who judge- she walks to an after school club with some friends so her phone which is NOT a smart phone acts as my lifeline to her. She lets me know when she is there safe.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
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    I don't think there's a right or wrong blanket answer here - it depends on the teenager.
    Or the controlling parent.
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
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    I don't think there's a right or wrong blanket answer here - it depends on the teenager.

    agreed.
  • Of_Monsters_and_Meat
    Of_Monsters_and_Meat Posts: 1,022 Member
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    I'm 53 and don't know what the coffee filters are for. Please explain.

    He is filtering the results...
  • 1brokegal44
    1brokegal44 Posts: 562 Member
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    Mine get their privacy unless I think something is going on that's harmful. Rolled my daughter's room with damn good reason a few months back. Found things I didn't want to find...think self-harm/ED issues etc. Her issues are resolving, so I don't feel the need for a repeat inspection...besides a search party would have to be dispatched to find me in that mess.
  • rowlandsw
    rowlandsw Posts: 1,166 Member
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    My room was a disaster so they'd do random cleanups and that's usually when stuff i had hidden got found lol. I'm a big supporter of random inspections even though i wasn't back then. Kids have way too much freedom these days so this is a good way to remind them that until they're 18 they don't get to do whatever they want.
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
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    I'm 53 and don't know what the coffee filters are for. Please explain.

    Either cleanup after teenager is done with the pictures or to avoid making too big a mess in the first place
  • SpeSHul_SnoflEHk
    SpeSHul_SnoflEHk Posts: 6,256 Member
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    My kids have their privacy until they have done something to lose that privilege. I knew someone who used to punish his teenagers when they did wrong by removing their bedroom doors. I've considered this, buthave never had occasion to use it.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
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    My mom and dad went through my room on occasion. Hated them for it. Now that I'm an adult, I understand why they did it.
  • donyellemoniquex3
    donyellemoniquex3 Posts: 2,384 Member
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    Well as a teen my parents didn't necessarily go through my room, but they did go through my backpack a lot. I was depressed and borderline suicidal because losing my BEST FRIEND to cancer when she was 12 and I was 13, it was REALLY hard. Plus my mom was still recovering from her brain surgery and going through her psychotic stages also sent me to the edge.
  • navyrigger46
    navyrigger46 Posts: 1,301 Member
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    My kids aren't teenagers yet, so not sure how I'll address this subject when that happens, but I'd like to think I'll allow them their privacy so long as they don't give me reason not to trust them. My dad once removed my bedroom door entirely, and frankly, with good reason, though I protested severely at the time.

    We'll see, I think it'll be highly situational.

    Rigger
  • ccrdragon
    ccrdragon Posts: 3,370 Member
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    I have an understanding with my kids - the wife and I pay for the roof over their heads and nothing in the house is off limits to me or their mother. I have never done a random room inspection but the possibility is and always will be there.
  • JoanneC1216
    JoanneC1216 Posts: 166
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    I know nothing about coffee filters. I would be curious.

    As for snooping, I am all for it, you may be saving your child.
  • jUStPunkin
    jUStPunkin Posts: 13 Member
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    ba dum bump

    (that was supposed to quote the "he's filtering results", but I don't know how to fix it now that I messed it up

    >.<