Do you separate meals for your kids?

salleymo

It depends on what I'm making. If it's something like asparagus, that I know they won't like, I'll give them an alternative vegetable. I won't cook an entirely different meal, but I will give other side dish options.

Thankfully, I don't have to deal with it too much, except my 3 year old has suddenly become very picky. I've never been able to feed him fast food (good thing), he loves home cooked food (very smart kid lol), but suddenly all he wants to eat is fish, fruit , rice and oatmeal...no veggies, no chicken, no turkey---not too bad, but I have to find a way to sneak those veggies back into his diet.

My 8 year old will eat whatever you put in front of him.

Francl27

They eat like we do, except on nights when I make some dish I know they won't eat (because it spinach and they 'don't like it' or it's spicy or something). Or nights when I'm starving at 5pm and having an early dinner (typically leftovers) and there's only enough for me. I guess that's maybe 1 or 2 nights a week. Typically we don't make 'one dish' meals so if they don't like one thing, they just eat more of the others (we do mixed veggies a lot so they can pick if needed).

Typically they have cheese tacos/quesadillas in that case though, or a sandwich, and fruit, so it could be worse.

KristinKory

My daughter is 2.5 years old and most of the time, she eats whatever I have prepared for everyone. There are some things she doesn't like, but she does enjoy a wide variety of foods. (like her mommy lol)

kgeyser

As a parent, there's nothing I enjoy more than non-parents questioning why I approach things with my children a certain way or tell me I should be doing it a different way. I imagine you feel the same way when people question you as a teacher and ask why you don't do things the way they think you should do them.

To answer your question, occasionally my children do get separate meals or separate items in a meal. They have to at least try 3 bites of whatever we are having for dinner, but if they don't like it, they can say no thank you. They often get separate vegetables, because neither is a fan of asparagus or zucchini (still have to try it every time we have it), but they will eat mixed vegetables all day long. I'd rather heat up something else and have them hit their nutritional needs than get in a fight over a friggin vegetable just because someone thinks if I'm not exerting total control over them and forcing my will that I'm failing somehow as a parent.

Occasionally my husband and I want to have something for dinner that the kids don't like, so on those nights they get chicken nuggets or leftovers. They are happy, healthy kids who eat a variety of foods and are always willing to try a new food - I like to think that knowing that it's ok to try something, not like it, and not be forced to eat it has something to do with that. One day they may grow to like those foods, or they may not, and that's fine. I grew up in a house where you had to eat every last bite, even if it meant sitting there alone for hours or gagging and vomiting. That tactic never made me like lima beans and made me dread meal times.

PhearlessPhreaks

I am under the philosophy of what I grew up with...this is what the family is eating tonight...period.

This is my philosophy as well, and reading 'French Kids Eat Everything' pretty much cemented it for me. If a whole country of wee ones can eat whatever is set before them without fanfare, so can children of other countries.

DawnieB1977

I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old, and we all eat the same. I work part time (I'm a teacher) and my husband does shift work, so there's no way I'm messing about doing separate meals! The only time I'd do something different is if we were having something really spicy for example, then I might do the kids a jacket potato instead.

When I weaned my 2 year old, I used to just purée the meals we were having, like stews, shepherds pie etc.

My 4 year old never used to eat a lot, and even now it takes some bribery, but he'll eat chilli, curry, pasta, stir fry etc. My daughter eats better than my son used to. I'm pregnant with my third now, and this one will also get the same food when she's ready!

I've never taken my kids to McDonald's, KFC etc because I don't like places like that.

They will happily snack on apples, pears, raisins etc, but they do also like chocolate!

cwolfman13

Yeah, sometimes. Pretty presumptuous to assume it's just crap food though OP...just because it's different than what mom and I are eating doesn't necessarily mean it's **** for food or something.

For one thing, there are certain spicy dishes that frequent our table...these foods are traditional to our area and we love them. Our 18 m.o. and 4 y.o. will likely love them someday....but at the moment, the heat makes them want to rip their tongues out of their mouths. So while we're eating a nice big bowl of green chile stew, they're maybe having some spaghetti and marinara with some grilled chicken or something.

Then we have our funky schedule. My wife and I switch off nights at the gym so when one of us is at the gym the other is at home getting the kids dinner. My youngest is in bed before she or I get home from the gym and my 4 y.o. is usually well on his way. So they eat earlier and we eat when the kids go to bed...so on those days we generally eat different foods for dinner.

We try to have "dinner party" (what my 4 y.o. calls it) on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. If we're doing a roast chicken or something...or like tonight, we're having a London Broil we all have the same thing...but again, sometimes we are having food that either my kids just won't eat or it is just not suitable food for their age.

My kids eat pretty good for the most part...not so into veg, but plenty of fruit and what not...but yeah...sometimes they have chicken nuggets too...and hotdogs, etc. They don't live off this stuff but yeah, they eat it and they like it and I don't see it as such a big deal...but it's always nice to get lectured by a non-parent about parenting. It's about as classic as it gets.

clanmcfleming

I have three kids, aged 3,8 and 11. I dont cook separate meals and never have. As soon as they were capable of finger food, basically they have eaten the same as the rest of the family. I dont fuss too much over uneaten food. The house rule is you must try everything on your plate and if you choose not to eat the rest, you may be hungry later (too bad if you are!). None of my children are fussy eaters although they all have preferences for some food over others. They all eat veggies, fruit, fish and most meat with very few exceptions. Thankfully no-one has any allergies or intolerance. I dont pander to requests for nuggets or pizza every night. Given the choice that is what they would opt for!

I think sitting down to eat together and to be seen to be eating the same food is the single biggest factor in influencing what my kids are prepared to eat. So I have a three year old who loves olives, an 8 year old who loves mushrooms and an 11 year old who loves haggis! (And yes, a lot of folk do eat haggis regularly in Scotland! We dont just pull it out to gross out visitors... and its yummo!)

jaynepickle

Nope. My kids eat what we're eating for dinner, or they don't eat. We set a timer for 30 minutes at the beginning of every meal and whatever they eat in that 30 minutes is all they get for that meal. If they don't like it, that's fine, but they have to at least try it, and accept the consequences that if they don't eat, they will be hungry. I don't give them sugary snacks throughout the day either, so by the time dinner rolls around, they want to eat. After much trial and error, this is what works best for our family. I find that I am a much better mother when I'm not tearing my hair out trying to force them to eat their dinners. Besides, how would I feel if someone tried to force me to eat when I wasn't hungry? Or something I didn't like?

PhearlessPhreaks

And remember, the taste buds are really at the core of what kids may or may not like, not what you want them to eat.

Sometimes. But a lot of times kids will decide they don't like something without trying it, and sometimes they pick up on the parent's cues (and expectations) that indicate they won't like something. I've had many parents say stuff like, "my kids would NEVER eat ____." Of course they won't! They won't even get to try!

Or, in the case of my 2yr old, she'll eat something one day, but won't the next! It's more of an independence issue right now, and we don't force foods, but it's there- if she eats it, awesome. If she doesn't.... oh well.

CJisinShape

I thought that too, then I had kids. It's harder than it looks.

Cyclingbonnie

I found this topic interesting. As a child who was not allowed to get up from the table until my plate was clean, I enjoyed all the different responses. I do not think the OP was being as critical as some thought. I truly feel that the clean plate enforcement added to my weight problem it also taught me to ignore being full. I am now trying to learn to listen to my full not full, and true hunger. I'm getting better at it.

I do, however, believe we should expose our children to new foods. One taste without drama. In other words my children where required to taste everything that was prepared. No, "ewwwwwws" or "gross" they were allowed to cover it up. My youngest put thousand island dressing on everything except salad LOL. They were not allowed to get other things at meal time and they were required to wait for at least an hour after meal time before they got a "snack".

Be patient, teen years solve the eating other things issue. One amusing meal instance ... my oldest was a teenager and my youngest was still in the picky stage. At dinner my youngest had one sprig of asparagus on his plate and he had just coated it in thousand island dressing. My oldest was in the process of scraping everything that was left on the table on to his plate. As he picked up the asparagus my youngest asked him "Do you like that?!" To which my oldest replied "No, but I'm starving!" Teenagers are bottomless pits, especially boys.

impyimpyaj

The only time I make something different for my kids is when I'm making something spicy, which they can't handle, or certain soups that they can't stand. Everything else, they eat what I make, or they don't eat.

PhearlessPhreaks

Yeah, sometimes. Pretty presumptuous to assume it's just crap food though OP...just because it's different than what mom and I are eating doesn't necessarily mean it's **** for food or something.

For one thing, there are certain spicy dishes that frequent our table...these foods are traditional to our area and we love them. Our 18 m.o. and 4 y.o. will likely love them someday....but at the moment, the heat makes them want to rip their tongues out of their mouths. So while we're eating a nice big bowl of green chile stew, they're maybe having some spaghetti and marinara with some grilled chicken or something.

Then we have our funky schedule. My wife and I switch off nights at the gym so when one of us is at the gym the other is at home getting the kids dinner. My youngest is in bed before she or I get home from the gym and my 4 y.o. is usually well on his way. So they eat earlier and we eat when the kids go to bed...so on those days we generally eat different foods for dinner.

We try to have "dinner party" (what my 4 y.o. calls it) on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. If we're doing a roast chicken or something...or like tonight, we're having a London Broil we all have the same thing...but again, sometimes we are having food that either my kids just won't eat or it is just not suitable food for their age.

My kids eat pretty good for the most part...not so into veg, but plenty of fruit and what not...but yeah...sometimes they have chicken nuggets too...and hotdogs, etc. They don't live off this stuff but yeah, they eat it and they like it and I don't see it as such a big deal...but it's always nice to get lectured by a non-parent about parenting. It's about as classic as it gets.

My 2yr old eats a little bit of spice- a while back, I made a chili with chipotle peppers, and she loved it! Crazy kid had tears running down her face from the heat as she was licking the bowl! But, I made a chickpea curry earlier this week, and it was too much for her, so we gave her some greek yogurt and granola. I don't think there are hard and fast rules... but I do know what the OP is talking about- I have a good friend who fits the bill. She's a foodie, but her husband is picky, and her 5yr old pretty much lives off sandwiches, pizza, hot dogs, mac n cheese, nutella and fries. And of course, anything snacky. She somewhat kids herself into thinking it's not too bad, because the snacks are "healthy" things like organic chocolate covered granola bars. They spent the night recently, and we had ordered in- me, my husband and our friend ordered chinese and some sushi; her husband ordered wings. Her son ate chocolate covered granola bars and organic cheese bunny crackers. My kid ate some sushi (veggie rolls, not real sushi yet!) and chicken teriyaki.

Phaedra2014

Hi
I am a teacher (grade one) - no kids.
I am curious:
How many of you that have kids, create separate meals for you/your partner and then something different for your kids?

Some of my friends might say...." my kids won't eat what I prepare for dinner, and the only thing they'll eat is chicken nuggets and french fries...so that's what I give them."

I am under the philosophy of what I grew up with...this is what the family is eating tonight...period.

If it's 'crappy' food for you, then why the heck are parents continually feeding their precious family these things?? I don't get it... Who's is in charge here?? Kids will eat...eventually!

Heck no! If it is asparagus and Brussels sprouts day, then they eat asparagus and Brussels sprouts. My kids weren't raised on the Standard American Diet so that made a huge difference in their eating habits.

accebersmith

My husband, son and I eat the same meal, with certain modifications made for me (preserve that calorie deficit) and my son (in a growth spurt...gimme fuel!). My son has Sensory Processing Disorder, which manifests itself at mealtime as a heightened sensitivity to spices, so my husband and I add heat at the table (good ol' Tabasco, Cholula, etc.) My son will demolish almost any fruit or vegetable you put before him, but getting him to eat meat is sometimes a challenge. We make sure his portions are kid-sized, and he tries everything on his plate, but we don't insist on a clean plate.

My son is currently a first grader.

Mof3wc

Yes and No.

I only cook one meal, but I'll sometimes cook it two ways.....if we're having teriyaki chicken that I know my kids won't eat, I'll leave some chicken out and cook it with just salt and pepper. Actually, that's pretty much true for all meats. My younger two do not like sauces, and I have no issue cooking their meat plain for them.

The only time I cook the kids a totally different meal is if we're having stew, they really hate it. On stew night I cook them something first and we eat later. But I refuse to make them nuggets just because they demand it. Ever.

knra_grl

Never have and never would - meal planning is pretty simple in my house - I cook like my mother - mostly meat and potato meals with a side of veg or salad - also a lot of homemade stews and soups and usually once a week pasta - funny thing my son will eat salad plain with no dressing (I always have dressing on my salad) He doesn't like salads with a mayo based dressing like potato salads or pasta salads he would eat the protein and opt to have some other veggie. He was a healthier eater than I was just due to his own preferences.

He will eat or at least try anything and takes what he likes and leaves the rest.