Potty training nightmare. Any suggestions?

19TaraLynn84
19TaraLynn84 Posts: 739 Member
in Chit-Chat
"Girls potty train earlier," they said. "Girls are easier to train," they said. "You potty-trained 3 boys. Your daughter will be a piece of cake!" they all told me.

LIES!!!!!

I used a timer method to train my two oldest boys. With my third, the timer didn't work so right after his third birthday, I told him I wouldn't buy any more diapers so he would need to use the potty. That worked on him. I've tried this and more with my daughter (almost 3). She gets so aggravated when her diaper is wet or dirty and asks for a new one, but she still refuses to use the potty.

What methods have you used to potty-train your little ones? Maybe I just need a fresh idea.
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Replies

  • marleyskye05
    marleyskye05 Posts: 138
    I suggest you join cafemom.com and ask there! Very helpful moms on there.
  • darkrose20
    darkrose20 Posts: 1,139 Member
    Maybe I just need a fresh idea.

    ...or a fresh kid??




    (kidding, BTW. I'd never actually suggest for realzies that you trade in your kid.)
  • Sunshine2plus2
    Sunshine2plus2 Posts: 1,492 Member
    Ok I have 4 children now 16, 12, 10 and 4

    1st boy trained at 3.5 years
    2nd girl trained at 24 mths
    3rd boy trained at 26 mths
    4th girl 3.5 years


    My advice is wait!! Let them do it, do not make them do it! My thought my youngest daughter would never train ever, she hated everything about it! One day she just decided to do it and we have never looked back! Night trained as well! Let her guide you! It will save you both time and frustration!!
  • maroonmango211
    maroonmango211 Posts: 908 Member
    When I was 7 months pregnant with baby 3 I was bound and determined to not change two butts in the house and spent almost a full 60 hours straight at the potty in the bathroom with my daughter who was almost 3 (other than night time and meals of course) we read some books, drew cartoons and talked a lot as well as potty danced to some music. There were a lot of tears and she hated me for a while, as well as my back and butt killed me after all that time on the floor preggers but it worked, after she knew she could do it and that IF she did it we could all get back to normal. We then went out to the mall and she got to pick out a new pack of underwear to replace the ones she had erm made accidents in.... I do think boys can be troublesome in their own way but man are girls more stubborn about it!

    Good luck!
  • KatieLouWho19
    KatieLouWho19 Posts: 776 Member
    All children are different as you know.... I think one day it will just "click".... My son was the same way..... He would tell me to change him after just wetting his diaper once... I told him no more diapers... He goes to the potty 9 billion times a day but we still put him in a pull up at night because he sleeps with us, and no one wants to wake up in a puddle of piddle. LOL.

    Just keep talking to her about it. Let her pick her own "big girl potty" or potty seat out to get her excited. (hopefully excited)
    I know my son LOVES his spiderman potty. So just try different ways to get her in there and just figure it all out!

    Best of luck!
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    Don't give her diapers anymore. Undies cold turkey.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    bump.
  • miss_jessiejane
    miss_jessiejane Posts: 2,819 Member
    Both my girls were potty trained before they were two. When they got old enough to tell me they had a wet/dirty diaper instead of just crying, I started potty training. And I bribed them to get them to do it. New clothes, new toys, small stuff, but they got something new for every week they went with out accidents. I also asked them every four and half minutes if they needed to go potty, until they got to the point they told me with out me asking.
  • TR0berts
    TR0berts Posts: 7,739 Member
    Not sure what you're using for her, but my parents tell me (I was too young to remember :laugh: ) that I wouldn't go potty on the little one they had for me until they got me one that looked like the big-boy potty.
  • KinoM
    KinoM Posts: 359 Member
    We let ours, a boy and a girl, pick out a new glittery sticker from a sheet and stick in on the potty every time they used it. Is there anything specific that she loves to do that you could use to incentivise potty use?
  • RobsGirl_lds
    RobsGirl_lds Posts: 211 Member
    I chose a week when I would be able to devote all my attention to my little ones and just Took the diaper off. The first day there were many accidents but by the third or fourth day they were almost gone. When an accident happened I would talk to them as I cleaned it up. I let them know accidents happen and that I love them. We would talk about how they felt before it happened and that that feeling ment they needed to sit on the toilet. After I cleaned up the mess they would sit on the toilet for a min to see if there was any more. (For this week till the accidents slowed I let them run around with out pants or undies.)

    The week befor to would start I would exaggerate my bathroom ritual. I would jump up and down yellng I have to pee, I have to pee! And run to the bathroom bringing my little one in with me. I would ask them if they could hear the pee going in the toilet. I would ask them if they knew anyone else that used the toilet. Mom, dad, grandma, grandpa......
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    Videos. It sounds like the easy way out and the songs will make you insane, but they work.
  • Collier78
    Collier78 Posts: 811 Member
    Two girls and one boy here...with the first girl, she just had to decide to on her own. With my boy, we played sink the boats (handful of cereal, froot loops/cheerios in the toilet, and he aimed for them) or I would turn him around backwards and give him a monster truck to play with on the tank while he went. The second girl is only just a year so we will see how she does it. Typically you just have to wait it out though. They eventually decide to do it on their own, and if you push to hard they can sometimes revert and have bedwetting issues.
  • BlueBombers
    BlueBombers Posts: 4,064 Member
    I'm so glad to be past that phase with my kids :grumble:
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,779 Member

    My advice is wait!! Let them do it, do not make them do it! My thought my youngest daughter would never train ever, she hated everything about it! One day she just decided to do it and we have never looked back! Night trained as well! Let her guide you! It will save you both time and frustration!!

    I think this is the way to go. People tell me that we did well with potty training my son, when, in fact, he was the one who decided to potty. all i did was provide the post-potty celebrations and treats.
  • wilsoje74
    wilsoje74 Posts: 1,720 Member
    If she knows it is important to you and you want her to do it, she might want to use that control and NOT do it. Some kids are like that. Act like it's no big deal. Never let her know it bothers you. she will do it eventually. Just keep the potty out and ask from time to time.
  • ewarlow
    ewarlow Posts: 71 Member
    I never pushed any of my kids - we would try things, let them get used to the potty or toilet.. used what each was comfortable with. My first (boy) trained at 3.5 - my middle daughter trained at 2.75 years and my youngest (girl) trained at 2.5 years.

    All of them basically did it on their own (with guidance) and had very few accidents.
  • Marcia315
    Marcia315 Posts: 460 Member
    despite my best efforts, my kids (one girl, one boy) would not do it until they wanted to.
  • Neonbeige
    Neonbeige Posts: 271 Member

    My advice is wait!! Let them do it, do not make them do it! My thought my youngest daughter would never train ever, she hated everything about it! One day she just decided to do it and we have never looked back! Night trained as well! Let her guide you! It will save you both time and frustration!!

    I think this is the way to go. People tell me that we did well with potty training my son, when, in fact, he was the one who decided to potty. all i did was provide the post-potty celebrations and treats.

    I agree, no training here, my kids just were ready and did it - being super proud :-) Plus almost no "accidents".

    I honestly cannot imagine spending hours/days/weeks on this. I mean we are not doing crawling, sitting, walking training, we wait until the kids are ready...
  • threefancy
    threefancy Posts: 93 Member
    All the books say to wait until they are ready. We tried that for awhile, but then finally just decided to force the issue with our son when he was 3. If we hadn't, I'm confident he would still be in a diaper. He's now 4. He is stubborn and doesn't like change.

    We sat him on the potty every 15 min at first, gradually increasing it up to an hour. We also bribed him....candy, stickers, etc.. Whatever it takes to motivates him. There are a lot of naysayers who will say to not use candy as a reward, but it wasn't a big deal to us. It's only for a couple of weeks.
  • CassandraBurgos83
    CassandraBurgos83 Posts: 544 Member
    This may be wrong, but my daughter was 2 yrs and two wks old and completely potty trained with min reese's cups. She knew every time she went to pee or poop she was rewarded with her favorite candy. Sugar you say is bad, but I say it saved me in diapers cost.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
    My daughter went pantsless for a while. She didn't like the trickling down her leg feeling one bit.

    Yes, it was messy. I must have shampooed my carpets hundreds of times.

    I also kept a potty chair close by. Our bathroom is on the 2nd floor, so it was pretty far away for the "OMG she's peeing right now" moments. So as soon as she started going, I plopped her down in the middle of the living room with her potty chair.

    To be honest, I didn't wait for her until she was ready. I started training her a month before her 2nd birthday. It took 5 months to train her 100%.
  • calico_cat
    calico_cat Posts: 17 Member
    Offer rewards. We would offer 1 candy for peeing in the potty initially, and later 1 or 2 for pooping. Offer her the best, most favorite candy she likes. You might even want to try new ones. If she loves chocolates, try new varieties.
  • mas_unlimited
    mas_unlimited Posts: 29 Member
    I am sorry to hear you are having such problems. I have two girls and one boy. I must say for me the boy was harder. But what worked for me, and believe me I have tried several different things, is to buy underwear with their favorite cartoon on them or at least a cartoon they like, like dora panties. Take a weekend, In the morning, take her diaper off and make a big deal over these Dora panties and that she is a big girl like Dora now and she can't get the panties wet but when she has to go to tell mommy and you will help her on her little potty chair. She will wet them and won't like it. The first time she wets them, take her to the potty chair and set her on the chair while you are putting the dirty panties away and getting a new pair of Dora panties. Wash her up and tell her to try not to get her Dora panties wet. Don't give in to any tantrums as it will make it worse the next time. Each time you give it, it gives the child control over you. You just need to guide her and remind her that she is a big girl now and big girls don't wear diapers. Don't resort to pull ups as those don't work either, I tried it. They need to feel the discomfort of wet pants and that will cause them to give in to using the potty chair. You really need to use a potty chair when you first start training as they need to be able to sit on it without your help. Try to encourage them to use the potty before bed. Depending on situation, I have used a pull up at night just to avoid an accident in the bed. But after a few days, you shouldn't need that at night either. I read some of the other posts. I could not afford to allow my daughter to choose when she was going to be potty trained or I would still be buying diapers until the cow came home. Expensive. That is what I did anyway and it worked on all three kids. My boy was more resistant but the first time he wet his underpants and no diapers in the house, he got the message and that was it from then on.
  • MagJam2004
    MagJam2004 Posts: 651 Member
    We let ours, a boy and a girl, pick out a new glittery sticker from a sheet and stick in on the potty every time they used it. Is there anything specific that she loves to do that you could use to incentivise potty use?

    I AM GOING TO START THIS TODAY AS SOON AS I BUY SOME STICKERS!!!

    My daughter had just started using the toilet when my son was born. The desire just stopped right then and there and now she wants to be babied. She turned 3 not long ago and my wife and I are tearing our hair out trying to get her on track. I'm of the mindset that I can't force her to do it, but I will try whatever I can to sway her. Her and stickers = obsession...this just might work.
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    Offer rewards. We would offer 1 candy for peeing in the potty initially, and later 1 or 2 for pooping. Offer her the best, most favorite candy she likes. You might even want to try new ones. If she loves chocolates, try new varieties.

    MFP post in 20 years:

    "My candy addiction started when I was being potty trained. I was rewarded with junk food every time I peed/pooped, and it carried on into my college years. My friends would laugh because they'd hear a toilet flush and then a candy wrapper crinkling immediately after. I see candy as a reward and here I am eating 1200 cals a day and JUST CAN'T LOSE WEIGHT OMG HALP!"

    Internet/joke
  • HelloAmbie
    HelloAmbie Posts: 46 Member
    Don't make it traumatic for her, let her start when she is ready. Don't force her to potty train if she isn't completely ready. Be patient keep trying, but don't be crazy about it.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    Elmo's Potty Time is great brain-washing.
  • mas_unlimited
    mas_unlimited Posts: 29 Member
    Even better, take your daughter with you to the store and check out all the big girl panties and let her choose some that she likes and get her all hyped up about going home and trying them on....oh what a big girl she will be.
  • askeates
    askeates Posts: 1,490 Member
    I am in the same boat.... My first 2 children were pretty easy.

    My oldest, she absolutely hated diapers from a young age... as soon as she started walking, we would take her to the bathroom with us any time we had to go, and sit her on her own little seat. We would read books and while she sat on the potty she could have a dum-dum pop. When she actually went to the potty, she got a couple M&M's or a sticker of her choice. And the BIG bonus was she could wear her big girl panties. She was actually just under a year old and she didn't wear diapers during the day, but nap time and night time she had a pull-up.

    My middle child, he was pretty laid back and really didn't care one way or the other so we had to work harder with him. He didn't like the little potty seat, so we put him on the "big boy" toilet. Pretty much the same drill, any time we had to go we would take him with. His reward was M&Ms. He didn't really give 2 hoots about stickers or the "big boy" pants. He was almost 2 when suddenly it all just clicked for him.

    My youngest, she goes in spurts. She will be 2 the beginning of April, and I have done the same with her as I did for the other 2.... as soon as she could walk, she goes to the potty when we go... Initially we tried the dum-dum pops to help encourage sitting on the potty, then went to singing songs, then tried reading books. She was doing it for a few weeks, not consistently, but at least a couple times a day. Then she just stopped. We would take her in with us, and she would do anything she could to NOT sit down. We have now tried the naked baby trials.... let her roam around with no diaper or pants on, keep the potty in the corner of the living room so if she needs it she can sit. We don't make a big deal out of it.... yea, hasn't worked yet. She loves being naked, but could care less about having an accident. We decided to take a break for 2 weeks and try again, and this past weekend she decided that she wants to start trying again. Still only a time or 2 a day, but it's getting there and she is showing a lot more interest in it.

    Good luck! Each child is very different.... but they will definitely let you know when they are ready.

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