NOT pregnant

3pisciotto

I carry some of my weight in my abdomen, and I also happen to like pickles, especially deep fried pickles from Montana's. I consistently get asked/comments "oh someone's 'craving" pickles, how far along are you?" I usually look at them and ask stupid, cause if you're going to be stupid enough to assume I'm pregnant without me telling you I am, I'm going to act just as stupid as you. "how far long with what? I didn't know liking to eat pickles might i had to be "along with something"" I usually get responses of "oh well usually pregnant "people" (not women) crave pickles" then they realize the stupid they've spoiled out of their mouth!
There is a difference between a pregnancy food craving and LIKING food!

knot_enough

the rule is, unless you see crowning, you do not assume that she is pregnant.

UmmaOfThree

That happened to me three times in my life. All three times, I was NOT fat. I'm apple-shaped, so I always have a belly. These days at several pounds heavier (after having 3rd baby), I tend to correct my posture and hold it in during some social situations because the last thing I need right now is someone thinking I'm pregnant and talking to me about it.

monstergirl14

I was stuck in the elevator at the hospital trying to visit my dad, and I was in there for a while. I was leaning against the wall, and I was over 200 pounds then, but a miserable old man said "Are you pregnant?" I know he was old, but I was already having such a terrible friggen day (for obvious reasons I just said) and that comment was the cherry on the cake. I was so embarrassed so I haven't told anyone.

IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym

is your profile picture a current one? Because, if so, wow. How could she possibly think that at all? Even still, uncalled for. I probably would have been sent to HR, if she weren't a friend or someone I socialized with.

liftingheavy1

she is a older women I am sure she meant no harm by it she did not know.

Qarol

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

You could have answer the OP's comments without adding your own feelings about babies or pregnant woman. Your references about babies and expectant mothers are more out of place, rude and gross that what the coworker said to the OP.

pretty sure you're far too sensitive for the internet

sevsmom

I keep my mouth shut most of the time unless I'm 99% positive. A few gals from my church who are super skinny and literally ONLY had a bit of a "bump" I went out on a limb and asked...."any exciting news in your world?" That way, even if they were pregnant they could blow me off with a simple "nope same old same old". But, the 3 times I've done it, I was so sure and they were so happy they gushed about it!

Conversly, my sister was so obese that a close family friend didn't realize she had been pregnant until he saw her with the baby. He saw her at least once a month during the pregnancy. It was awkward when he asked me about it.

So, I guess it *can* go both ways.

rieann84

I made the mistake of thinking someone was pregnant and asked the "how far along are you?" question. I was about 18 years old and working at a children's portrait studio chain in the mall. I was absolutely embarrassed and mortified. I will never, ever make that mistake again.

That being said... adults should know better. Especially adults who have previously struggled with weight. What gives?!?

myjourney_2013

The same thing happen to me. A co-worker send me an email saying CONGRAT!!! I said on what...she said, you're having a baby. At that point I felt really bad, I believe that was her intention. She's not the nicest person, nor is she the slimmest!!! SMH People feel like they can say anything these days. I wish they sold filters for their mouths!

tomomatic

Rule of thumb: Never assume that someone is with child unless the baby is visibly hanging out of them.

One of my coworkers had a formal complaint opened against him for this.

smurdock1991

You should have launched into a performance about your water breaking, contractions, you can feel the dilation (would work best in a skirt), omg it's crowning, and then you give birth to two middle fingers.

^This comment! LOL! :laugh:

wow29

:blushing:

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

You could have answer the OP's comments without adding your own feelings about babies or pregnant woman. Your references about babies and expectant mothers are more out of place, rude and gross that what the coworker said to the OP.

pretty sure you're far too sensitive for the internet

JoRocka

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

No no, it IS an alien growing in there. :laugh:

HAH- we come to the conclusion they are more like parasites than aliens- but I can't help but thinking of aliens when the thing explodes out of his chest in the movie. I go through like mini movies in my head when I have to talk to about it- it makes me chuckle a little bit

pretty sure you're far too sensitive for the internet

heh- i giggled.

krawhitham

THIS is why I never ever ever comment on pregnant people. Ever. I don't ask anyone how far along they are, or say congratulations. More often than not the person is just fat. I find older people making this faux pas more often than younger...

3dogsrunning

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

No no, it IS an alien growing in there. :laugh:

HAH- we come to the conclusion they are more like parasites than aliens- but I can't help but thinking of aliens when the thing explodes out of his chest in the movie. I go through like mini movies in my head when I have to talk to about it- it makes me chuckle a little bit

pretty sure you're far too sensitive for the internet

heh- i giggled.

I'm pretty sure that someone who wrote one of those books about pregnancy called them a parasite. But if you saw one of my early ultrsound pics, it definitely looked like an alien. I'll spare the photo.

ren_ascent

could have- but it explains why it's easy for me to avoid them- and I would highly disagree- it's not nearly as offensive as walking up to someone and saying "are you pregnant" or walking up to someone and saying "I hate pregnant people"

. I didn't address anyone in particular. i'ts a generic feeling. I wasn't attacking anyone.

not everyone has to love or even like the whole baby process and I don't have to be.

Ya know, 6 months ago this would have bothered me. But now I'm pregnant and it creeps one of my co-workers/friends out. He says the same thing about there being an alien in there! So I just find it funny because he's still a good friend. And I use it to torment him "oh look, I can see her trying to push out" LOL. But that's because I'm evil.

Holly_Roman_Empire

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

You could have answer the OP's comments without adding your own feelings about babies or pregnant woman. Your references about babies and expectant mothers are more out of place, rude and gross that what the coworker said to the OP.

As a woman that has been pregnant and given birth, I agree with her. Even the birthing process is like a scene from a horror movie.

Yanicka1

I was a size 2-4 last time I was asked that question.....you can make sure I won't be wearing that dress again

3dogsrunning

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

You could have answer the OP's comments without adding your own feelings about babies or pregnant woman. Your references about babies and expectant mothers are more out of place, rude and gross that what the coworker said to the OP.

As a woman that has been pregnant and given birth, I agree with her. Even the birthing process is like a scene from a horror movie.

I'm not offended by the comment (I am currently pregnant) but I sort of agreed with the other poster point a bit too. It was a little wtf, but then again, par for the course.

caution - baby belly in avatar

<---

JAllen32

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

O.o Woooooow.

kikkipoo

I was the type who always had to tell people I was pregnant because I knew in reality they thought I was just getting fatter since I am already a bigger girl to begin with. I have small babies. Full term I just had a bump the size of a normal 4 month along person. I went and paid my rent to the landlord every month through my entire pregnancy and when I walked in with the baby after he was born, she asked me who he belonged to. It sucks both ways. People who do know always asking you if something is wrong? Have the doctors said anything? etc. The topic just needs to be avoided at all cause.

toronto_j

I can't believe there are people in this day and age who still don't know that it's rude to ask. I once had a dry cleaner (an older woman) ask me...it was really odd because I was covered up in a heavy parka. A friend of mine has reproductive issues (fibroids, I think) that cause her stomach to protrude...she likely can't even have children and she's told me several people have commented on her looking pregnant.

Kate

A woman I saw every Sunday, in fact she was a greeter at the door to the church sanctuary, did not know I was pregnant until I showed up with the baby. And this is not because I was one of those women "didn't show"....:(

JoRocka

I'm pretty sure that someone who wrote one of those books about pregnancy called them a parasite. But if you saw one of my early ultrsound pics, it definitely looked like an alien. I'll spare the photo.

well to be honest- they behave pretty much like a parasite does- living off another human being. shrug.

thank you for sparing photo-although ultra sounds- it's weird to me- but not really overly weird- in person is much weirder for some reason.... LOL- I have low squeamish tolerance for such things.
probably wouldn't have seen it either way. work blockages and such. SAVED by the firewalls LMAO

Ya know, 6 months ago this would have bothered me. But now I'm pregnant and it creeps one of my co-workers/friends out. He says the same thing about there being an alien in there! So I just find it funny because he's still a good friend. And I use it to torment him "oh look, I can see her trying to push out" LOL. But that's because I'm evil.

I MAY have actually run away had you done that to me- like a small child if their parents talking about kissing LMAO. Seriously- i'ts not hing personal when I said that- it just REALLY skeeves me out!!!

I can't believe there are people in this day and age who still don't know that it's rude to ask. I once had a dry cleaner (an older woman) ask me...it was really odd because I was covered up in a heavy parka. A friend of mine has reproductive issues (fibroids, I think) that cause her stomach to protrude...she likely can't even have children and she's told me several people have commented on her looking pregnant.

I have a friend with a similar issue (she's trying to have plan surgery soon) and I'm honestly surprised she hasn't mentioned more comments like this- she's plump- and has some weird stomach/protrusion issues as well. Actually mostly makes me sad for her- because I know it makes her life miserable- so to have THAT question on top of it. shudder.

jenn26point2

You should have launched into a performance about your water breaking, contractions, you can feel the dilation (would work best in a skirt), omg it's crowning, and then you give birth to two middle fingers.

This. This is priceless!

__freckles__

there are some people who SERIOUSLY carry all their weight in their belly and forward.

I know a girl like that- and she has told me 3 people have asked her if she was- breaks my heart because she abosolutely looks about 4-5 months along- but I knew better.

you NEVER ask- let them bring it up.

easy for me- babies are gross- I hate talking about them- so I just pretend pregnant people don't exist until they engage me directly- pregnant women creep me out. it's like an alien growing in there.

I'd rather just assume you were fat- that's easier and safer!

Sorry OP- that's so rude- glad you followed up with an email- but I like the "seriously you haven't retired yet!!!" comment- that would have been good

You could have answer the OP's comments without adding your own feelings about babies or pregnant woman. Your references about babies and expectant mothers are more out of place, rude and gross that what the coworker said to the OP.

As a woman that has been pregnant and given birth, I agree with her. Even the birthing process is like a scene from a horror movie.

+2

justpeachy99

Oh my goodness.. I cannot imagine how you felt. Today I looked in the mirror and realized I looked pregnant. I got to get on the band wagon myself.

You can add me if you want to

dirtmagnets

I was the type who always had to tell people I was pregnant because I knew in reality they thought I was just getting fatter since I am already a bigger girl to begin with. I have small babies. Full term I just had a bump the size of a normal 4 month along person. I went and paid my rent to the landlord every month through my entire pregnancy and when I walked in with the baby after he was born, she asked me who he belonged to. It sucks both ways. People who do know always asking you if something is wrong? Have the doctors said anything? etc. The topic just needs to be avoided at all cause.

Avoid at all costs - I agree. I've had the comments when not pregnant before, too, and it's so embarrassing. On the flip side, the lady I worked out with most often at my old fencing club had no idea that I was pregnant with my fourth until I was more than 6 months along...and then freaked out about fencing with me, worried about hurting him, even though I reassured her repeatedly that my midwife and her supervising doctor were both fine with me continuing to fence as long as I was comfortable. (I gave in and quit about a month later, when I suddenly couldn't zip my jacket.) Then came all the comments about looking too small and wondering if there was something wrong, which made me crazy every throughout all four pregnancies - I've carried fairly "small" with all of my kids somehow, even though this one was nearly 10 pounds at birth.

Amandawith3kids

sooo many people have asked me if i was. one woman went on and on while i was at my friends baby shower about how nice it was i was pg at the same time as my friend blah blah. i had just had my tubes tied like 4 days before that. then she tried to pass it off as swelling from surgery. yeah, ok. i have 2 bandaids as my "surgical dressing" lol.
the most recent time was when i took my 2 year old for his well visit and the dr asked me when i was due. i tell him i wasnt pg and he tells me i should wear better clothes (to be fair the shirt does make me look pg) i wish i had held out my hand for his credit card. if i had MONEY for better clothes i WOULD HAVE THEM.


i also have a friend who never showed at all (she is very big) and we went out shopping together when we were both about 8 months along (she had her baby on the 8th, i had mine on the 9th which was her birthday) and i was getting all sorts of comments and congrats and nobody said a word to her. i felt so bad, i know that hurt her. we avoided shopping after that. she ended up having a 4 pound baby, and mine was 10 pounds.