Conflicted

Sinisterly
Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
in Chit-Chat
Have you ever been conflicted between choice A and choice B?
Or C or D or whatever else other choice there is?

Well, something's come up.. And I'm conflicted right now.
EXTREMELY conflicted. Feels as if the lines are blurred somewhere along the way and I just cannot, for the life of me, decide what to do!

How do YOU deal when you are conflicted about something that you just cannot shake?
What helps you decide which route to go?? What is your thought process like?

Just looking for some insight here.

:flowerforyou:
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Replies

  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Oh, and just wanted to add, not going to discuss what the choices are haha.
    Bit personal, but hey.

    Any input extremely appreciated, as I am going out of my wits end and have lost contact with most of my friends in town over moving away.
  • s4naz
    s4naz Posts: 86 Member
    I generally would choose the choice that I think I would regret more.

    There is also that saying that basically says that you should throw a coin in the air, and you will know what side you want it to land - that's your choice.
  • mrphil86
    mrphil86 Posts: 2,382 Member
    First gut instinct.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    I generally would choose the choice that I think I would regret more.
    Right. This is me right there. I know I HAVE TO quite possibly make the choice I'd hate most. It eats me up inside.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    First gut instinct.
    If your gut hasn't decided which is which, how do you choose it, then?
  • bigbarnold
    bigbarnold Posts: 2,554 Member
    Its very hard to give advise on something that you don't know what it is your giving advise about, but with that being said... Sometimes I think I am conflicted and really I knew the path that I wanted to go the whole time. Take your time and think the whole thing through and I know that you will make the right choice FOR YOU. Whatever it is, I hope that you make the choice that makes you happy!
  • Technolero
    Technolero Posts: 90
    Don't over-analyze . Go with your gut feeling.
  • vjohn04
    vjohn04 Posts: 2,276 Member
    write out a pluses and delta / pros and cons list
  • ihad
    ihad Posts: 7,463 Member
    I would spend some time thinking about the criteria for deciding first - what factors should I consider in making the decision and how important are they relative to each other. Then consider the options relative to the criteria.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    time to play... rock, paper, scissors, lizard, spock.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    time to play... rock, paper, scissors, lizard, spock.
    Lol <3.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Its very hard to give advise on something that you don't know what it is your giving advise about, but with that being said... Sometimes I think I am conflicted and really I knew the path that I wanted to go the whole time. Take your time and think the whole thing through and I know that you will make the right choice FOR YOU. Whatever it is, I hope that you make the choice that makes you happy!
    Yes, sorry about the vagueness haha. Just don't want to get a ton of PMs about it.
    Just path 1 will take some time, path 2.. Shouldn't, but then path 1 will probably be very unhappy indeed.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Don't over-analyze . Go with your gut feeling.

    I wouldn't think I'm over analyzing, not in this case. However, choice 1 changes quite a bit and is driving this hangry bunny insane.
    write out a pluses and delta / pros and cons list


    Very good idea! I will definitely try this. I love lists :) lol :flowerforyou:
    I would spend some time thinking about the criteria for deciding first - what factors should I consider in making the decision and how important are they relative to each other. Then consider the options relative to the criteria.

    Hmmm. With importance, yes. That's also true. Happiness doesn't always go hand in hand with something being important, as a any adult, I can see that.
    Thanks for the perspective on that!
  • JenniCali1000
    JenniCali1000 Posts: 646 Member
    I'd go with the flip a coin idea. You'll know what you really want when it's in the air ;)
  • Willbenchforcupcakes
    Willbenchforcupcakes Posts: 4,955 Member
    If it's a life-changing decision, I wait until both my mind and my heart are going in the same direction. Sometimes causes me to stay in the same place longer than I should, but looking back, I have never regretted waiting and then moving forward, whereas I have regretted a few times where I've made a hasty decision.

    Anything else? I go with the flip a coin decision making approach.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    Divination.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    If it's a life-changing decision, I wait until both my mind and my heart are going in the same direction. Sometimes causes me to stay in the same place longer than I should, but looking back, I have never regretted waiting and then moving forward, whereas I have regretted a few times where I've made a hasty decision.

    Anything else? I go with the flip a coin decision making approach.

    I think I love you. :flowerforyou:
    There's an answer I can go to bed with tonight! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    You are wise.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    sleep on it - your subconscious will do the work for you
  • Willbenchforcupcakes
    Willbenchforcupcakes Posts: 4,955 Member
    If it's a life-changing decision, I wait until both my mind and my heart are going in the same direction. Sometimes causes me to stay in the same place longer than I should, but looking back, I have never regretted waiting and then moving forward, whereas I have regretted a few times where I've made a hasty decision.

    Anything else? I go with the flip a coin decision making approach.

    I think I love you. :flowerforyou:
    There's an answer I can go to bed with tonight! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

    You are wise.

    :heart: you to Sin! You'll come up with the right answer in time :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • GertrudeHorse
    GertrudeHorse Posts: 646 Member
    Usually I make a pros and cons list and try to make decisions rationally rather than emotionally. Although it depends on what the matter is being decided. The deciding factor is usually what will make me happiest in the long-term.

    Other questions I would ask myself:

    - will anyone get hurt by this decision
    - who else will this decision affect besides me
    - what is the worst case scenario for either choice / what is the best case scenario for either choice
    - will either choice take a toll on my mental or physical health
    - what would i advise a friend who was facing the same dilemma
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    tumblr_mi18d3sFQ61qd8ppoo6_400.gif
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    tumblr_mi18d3sFQ61qd8ppoo6_400.gif
    lolwat

    Edit: Doesn't have to do with marriage lmaoo
    You's a funny orange! :flowerforyou:
  • Perplexities
    Perplexities Posts: 612 Member
    Have you ever been conflicted between choice A and choice B?
    Or C or D or whatever else other choice there is?

    Well, something's come up.. And I'm conflicted right now.
    EXTREMELY conflicted. Feels as if the lines are blurred somewhere along the way and I just cannot, for the life of me, decide what to do!

    How do YOU deal when you are conflicted about something that you just cannot shake?
    What helps you decide which route to go?? What is your thought process like?

    Just looking for some insight here.

    :flowerforyou:

    Joined Dec 2013
    Posts: 8,929

    Artist-2061029-bertstare_zps47ce8cee.jpg
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Have you ever been conflicted between choice A and choice B?
    Or C or D or whatever else other choice there is?

    Well, something's come up.. And I'm conflicted right now.
    EXTREMELY conflicted. Feels as if the lines are blurred somewhere along the way and I just cannot, for the life of me, decide what to do!

    How do YOU deal when you are conflicted about something that you just cannot shake?
    What helps you decide which route to go?? What is your thought process like?

    Just looking for some insight here.

    :flowerforyou:

    Joined Dec 2013
    Posts: 8,929

    Artist-2061029-bertstare_zps47ce8cee.jpg
    That wasn't the question, but hello again! :flowerforyou:
  • PixTheCupCakeDestroyer
    PixTheCupCakeDestroyer Posts: 442 Member
    I generally take the path of least resistance, but I'm selfish and horrible, so I might not be a good person to listen to.


    I do what I want, I sent Regret on a vacation with Guilt, I don't have time for either one.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Usually I make a pros and cons list and try to make decisions rationally rather than emotionally. Although it depends on what the matter is being decided. The deciding factor is usually what will make me happiest in the long-term.

    Other questions I would ask myself:

    - will anyone get hurt by this decision
    - who else will this decision affect besides me
    - what is the worst case scenario for either choice / what is the best case scenario for either choice
    - will either choice take a toll on my mental or physical health
    - what would i advise a friend who was facing the same dilemma


    1) Oh, yes.
    2.) Unsure if the number is 4 or 3 at the moment, so quite a few people.
    3.) Ditto.
    4.) Definitely lol. The dread is huge with this one.
    5.) Love this question, will think about it, also. Thank you for your input!! :flowerforyou:
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
    tumblr_mi18d3sFQ61qd8ppoo6_400.gif
    lolwat

    Edit: Doesn't have to do with marriage lmaoo
    You's a funny orange! :flowerforyou:

    :smooched:

    Well if this conflict has nothing to do with your love for me, I've got nothing. :grumble:
  • sdbeachbum
    sdbeachbum Posts: 664 Member
    Have you ever been conflicted between choice A and choice B?
    Or C or D or whatever else other choice there is?

    Well, something's come up.. And I'm conflicted right now.
    EXTREMELY conflicted. Feels as if the lines are blurred somewhere along the way and I just cannot, for the life of me, decide what to do!

    How do YOU deal when you are conflicted about something that you just cannot shake?
    What helps you decide which route to go?? What is your thought process like?

    Just looking for some insight here.

    :flowerforyou:


    If there's a gut instinct I would go with that :flowerforyou:
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    I generally take the path of least resistance, but I'm selfish and horrible, so I might not be a good person to listen to.


    I do what I want, I sent Regret on a vacation with Guilt, I don't have time for either one.
    Lol, I can't be selfish. I was never selfish, even as a child.
  • GertrudeHorse
    GertrudeHorse Posts: 646 Member
    1) Oh, yes.
    2.) Unsure if the number is 4 or 3 at the moment, so quite a few people.
    3.) Ditto.
    4.) Definitely lol. The dread is huge with this one.
    5.) Love this question, will think about it, also. Thank you for your input!! :flowerforyou:

    Are these people you care about? Is their hurt something they can recover from? Obviously it's ideal to avoid hurting people where possible, but sometimes short-term hurt is inevitable and you just need to cause it and move on with things. Especially if it's something like ending a toxic relationship. Sure the other person will get hurt, but you the long-run positivity outweighs that imo. But, yeah, difficult to say without knowing more specifics (which I won't push for - sorry if that sounded like it!). Anyway, it might help you to make a decision tree listing potential outcomes and risks for each choice. Also be aware that dread is normal and feeling dread doesn't mean you're making a bad choice. Anxiety about big decisions is very common, so spend some time pondering if you have the luxury of time. Good luck :flowerforyou:

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