Telling professor about my bingeing?

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Replies

  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    .....in fact I have a lot of Jewish fairness and one ex.

    Okay, now I'm in. Tell me more about this "Jewish fairness". Are you saying something about your physical features like your nose or complexion or something? Or are you really good with money? Seriously asking, as I'm not familiar with this term.

    Does dating the ex mean that you're cleared to make anti Semitic comments, you know, kinda how dating a black guy would give you a free pass to use the N word? Wait, that's not a free pass? Uh oh.
  • PJPrimrose
    PJPrimrose Posts: 916 Member
    I think she meant to say Jewish friends, not fairness, sort of like a typo . I think she was referring to the levity of her professor and his laid back attitude which she may think of as a Jewish trait. Btw, I have a lot of Jewish relatives,was raised in a Jewish house hold, and I didn't see how this was anti-Semitic. Where the heck did the N word come from? I didn't read any derogatory Jewish terms either. WTH does Fiddler on the Roof have to do with anything? It doesn't do the Jewish people any good if you look to jump on folks for every little perceived slight IMHO. I guess I lucked out in the Jewish relative dept. If I had to walk on eggshells every time I said anything it would be really aggravating.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Oooooh, it was an auto correct error and she meant that she has lots of Jewish friends.

    Well, that certainly makes it better.
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    I think she meant to say Jewish friends, not fairness, sort of like a typo . I think she was referring to the levity of her professor and his laid back attitude which she may think of as a Jewish trait. Btw, I have a lot of Jewish relatives,was raised in a Jewish house hold, and I didn't see how this was anti-Semitic. Where the heck did the N word come from? I didn't read any derogatory Jewish terms either. WTH does Fiddler on the Roof have to do with anything? It doesn't do the Jewish people any good if you look to jump on folks for every little perceived slight IMHO. I guess I lucked out in the Jewish relative dept. If I had to walk on eggshells every time I said anything it would be really aggravating.

    Or. And I'm probably going out on a limb here. But just maybe. You could lighten up. Just a little bit. Maybe.
  • Mpol2
    Mpol2 Posts: 442 Member
    OP, glad you went to class, honey. Keep moving forward and don't let binges paralyze you. Good luck:flowerforyou:
  • meritage4
    meritage4 Posts: 1,441 Member
    Get yourself to class. Tell your Prof you will be leaving frequently for emergency bathroom breaks. Tell your lab partner that also. Do the very best you can. Perhaps a normal focus will help you in the long run.

    Hope you feel better. :flowerforyou:

    ^^^This. Best approach so far. Excellent.
    This ^^^^
    Go to class. Go to the washroom as needed. Tell prof. you have health issues-and leave it at that.

    Glad you went to class! Time to move on towards success! Way to go!
  • SillyC2
    SillyC2 Posts: 275 Member
    Glad you made it to lab!

    Another college professor here....

    So, in the future....

    Labs are hard to make up. When a student needs to make up a lab, that's typically 8 hours of additional work out of myself, our prep person, and the TA to make that happen. There's a such thing as being too sick to make it to lab, but if you can drag your *kitten* in, please please do so.

    This isn't high school, so there's not "get a note, get out of doing work" going on at college. If you have health problems, you don't get a pass - your grade goes down OR you get to make it up. But making up work means that the subsequent week is going to suck pretty hard because you'll be doing your make up work at the same time as your regular work. I've rarely had students successfully "make up" more than a couple of days worth of work.

    If you're at that point several times during the semester, it's time to talk to the dean of students, rather than your prof, about a medical withdrawal.
  • ashandstuff
    ashandstuff Posts: 442 Member
    OP, good for you for getting treatment! Recovery isn't easy, and there will be bad days. Learning to deal with the bad days is a /big/ step in recovery. So, congratulations to you for overcoming your fears and getting through your daily routine!!!

    Currently, I am working in a university as a Teaching Assistant for 90 students. You wouldn't believe some of the personal stuff I hear from my students on a daily basis. I've had students that admitted to me they were suicidal, alcoholics, eating disorders, even had one girl tell me about her failing/abusive marriage. Personally, I really think it's great when students are able to open up to their teachers...because teachers tend to CARE about their students well being and development. Most professors have heard MANY MANY MANY different reasons (both good and bad) for missing classes. I wouldn't worry that he will judge you for having a real medical issue.

    So, if you want to tell your professor about it then go ahead!

    However, it's not necessary to tell him /everything/, but I'm sure he would appreciate knowing that you are dealing with a medical issue. That way he can be sure to be prepared to work closely with you should any problems/complications arise.

    My point is...some professors are more strict about providing an excused absence note or what have you. Your therapist should be able to 1) give him a call and explain the situation, 2) write a note for you, 3) get you an appointment at a doctor/health center so you can get a doctors note. That should be good enough for most professors!

    Good luck, OP!
  • glitterstreet
    glitterstreet Posts: 144
    Whatever you do; do not tell your professor about your bingeing. He is very unlikely to care and it won't cover your absences from class. Go to the doctor and go a certified note. It's a legal issue, your professor cannot control this.
  • azyzzam
    azyzzam Posts: 36
    Oooooh, it was an auto correct error and she meant that she has lots of Jewish friends.

    Well, that certainly makes it better.

    This, I was in a hurry before class lol

    Lab ended early just out!
  • ublanchard
    ublanchard Posts: 47
    So I did end up going to class, it actually 2 classes! I went to the one I didn't want to go to and am at the 5:00-9:30 one right now waiting till it starts. I walked in a little late and should have told the professor because he did joking comment on me being tardy but I just said hi (late reaction). My lab partner also ditched me today but she's here for my next class.


    I would never use it as an excuse to miss class and I wasn't trying to 'confide' in him but I just wasn't sure how much to tell him. Lol @ all the Jewish comments, the only reason I mentioned that was to add details, I guess it wasn't really neccessary. I really have nothing against Jewish people, in fact I have a lot of Jewish fairness and one ex.

    Good for you for powering through!
  • kuolo
    kuolo Posts: 251 Member
    I am a college professor. Unless they are looking for help, I do not like it when students overindulge in their personal lives. It comes off as an excuse to get special treatment and free passes for not handling their responsibilities. If you are missing class and you need to make up assignments, you need to provide a note from a medical professional. Otherwise, you are just asking your professor to make exceptions for you. I tell my students that college is not only a place to learn but it is also 'dress rehearsal' for your real job. Most companies would not allow you to miss days for binge eating. If you are not actively seeking help for your condition, you can't expect your professors to help you by allowing you to miss assignments and class. You have to get help. Most colleges and universities offer free counseling and/or referral programs for students. Please seek help immediately for your eating issues. Your health and education are at risk.

    Harsh and judgemental much?

    She is getting help, didn't you read her post?

    I am so glad my school was more understanding than you appear to be, otherwise I would not have survived my ED.

    And school is school, it is not real life, nor is it a job. An employee is paid, a student is the one paying. Big difference.

    Plus most employers actually have empathy for mental health problems. And (in the UK at least) there are discrimination laws about it too - so yes, you would be able to take time off a job if you are having mental health problems.

    Not harsh or judgemental. I think this poster missed the part about OP seeking professional help but what she's saying is true and doesn't invalidate mental illnesses. If you are missing assignments or exams, you should be required to bring in a doctors note excusing your absence just as you would for a medical illness.

    Edited to add that school is "real life". Why should the professor allow her to make up exams/quizzes or assignments without legitimate proof explaining her absence (a doctors note, not TMI from OP herself)?

    You may be able to take time off of work for mental health issues but it doesn't change the fact that you would need proof from a doctor as opposed to just an employees word.

    I wasn't questioning the need for a sick note, I just thought it was a v negative post overall, focusing on things like 'over indulge' 'free pass' 'not handling responsibilities' 'excuse' etc with a complete lack of empathy for what the OP might be going thru. Eating disorders can be a living he'll and I thought all the negativity in the response was unnecessary.

    And no, imo school is not real life! :smile:
  • kuolo
    kuolo Posts: 251 Member
    OP good for you for going. Hope things get better for you :flowerforyou:
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    :cry: bingeing is terrible. you've shed light for me today OP.
    :grumble: the jewish track completely missed the yummy jewish foods.
    :wink: autocorrect is awesome. so is dave.
    :embarassed: i thought the ombudsman would be a place to turn for assistance? am i wrong?
    :love: OP made it to some classes! way to power thru.
    :angry: no 8,000 cal competition jokes. I know NOTHING about bingeing but OP's OP made it CLEAR as crystal this is a serious problem
    :sick: uptight lady is uptight and kinda unawares how racial/ethnic judgements can sneak into our consciousness and become okay.
    so happy OP has a sense of humor, a spine, and follow thru, you will go far girlie~!:flowerforyou: :drinker:

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