Co-workers are not about this life...

I share an office with 3 people who are SO not about the healthy life. They eat out daily and give me dirty looks about my healthy eating.. Not to mention the 30 other people at the work place who roll their eyes at my brown rice and chicken in the break room… Anyway, any tips for turning them down when they invite me out to eat all the time?
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Replies

  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    I brought my own lunch but thanks.

    I can't stand people like that. I just make it very clear my food choices are about me- I'm not asking anyone to eat them- and I please don't take my food desicions personally (like not eating cake or whatever- tha'ts a big one)

    "how do you eat that" or even worse "I could never eat that"
    response
    >>because I like it and it is going to fit my goals
    >> I don't' seem to recall asking you to eat it

    I work for a very large department- and we hire quiet a number of people- from all different backgrounds- so it's common for people to stop eating- or have dietary restrictions due to their culture or religion... I whip that card out all the time when I tell them I'm not eating x food at this time- I just tell them it's fasting time for the church of iron.

    I seriously don't have time for people like that. My food choices are like me wearing make up at the gym- it doesn't affect you at all- so stop coping an attitude about it.

    my number one come back is

    "If I wanted to look like you- I'd eat like you."

    That being said- it is good to go out and eat with your coworkers occasionally- I just plan around it and do the best I can. But it's good for moral to GO do things with them- even if it means bringing your own lunch- or going a little hungry (I will sometimes only eat a lip service salad - save money and go back and eat my delicious lunch at my desk)
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    Unless you make a lot of comments about their diets, or you have a holier than thou attitude about your diet, it's doubtful that everyone cares enough to, well....care what you are eating. Keep your diet to yourself, say no to going out and let it be. If you really need an excuse to say no, saving money is a great one.

    But, seriously, most people couldn't care less about other people's diets unless that diet is being discussed on the regular.
  • dschassie
    dschassie Posts: 192 Member
    I would thank them for the invite and then just say "No thanks, I brought my own lunch today". I'd be really careful not to annoy them with too much of the "I am eating healthy now", "I made some lifestyle changes" talk....The less annoyed they are about it, the faster they will stop rolling their eyes and just accept the new you. A piece of advise though, maybe once a week or every other week, take them up on their offer so you do not alienate them. After all, they are the people that you spend most of your day around, you don't want them to start excluding you.
  • ChaplainHeavin
    ChaplainHeavin Posts: 426 Member
    Anyway, any tips for turning them down when they invite me out to eat all the time?

    "Thank you, but no, I enjoy bringing my own lunch. Thanks for the invite.
  • everforever8
    everforever8 Posts: 16 Member
    You could also look at it from an "I'm trying to save money by not eating out every day" perspective....People usually respond a little bit better to that...if they offer to pay, just say 'no thank you'.
  • LosingItForGood13
    LosingItForGood13 Posts: 182 Member
    No thank u and Im trying to get my body healthy
  • ktsmom430
    ktsmom430 Posts: 1,100 Member
    I hear you. Same thing happened to me. Eventually they stopped the eye rolling and trying to tempt me to eat things, or go out to lunch, when they realized I was not going to give in. They don't ask me anymore to go out to lunch, but just because they know that I won't go. We have a great working relationship and they accept my way of eating now.
  • diamier
    diamier Posts: 66 Member
    Well, just get used to it, and like the first commentator said: thanks, but I've brought my own food. People, who just see that any individual acts in different manners as they, mostly will think that it's insane, stupid, but just keep in mind, that it is not permanent. They will gradually get used to it and they won't look or care. Just don't get stressed over this and keep in mind the goal that you reach for and that your diet choices don't and won't make any harm for THEm, so there's really nothing to worry about. Good luck!
  • greenmonstergirl
    greenmonstergirl Posts: 619 Member
    I share an office with 3 people who are SO not about the healthy life. They eat out daily and give me dirty looks about my healthy eating.. Not to mention the 30 other people at the work place who roll their eyes at my brown rice and chicken in the break room… Anyway, any tips for turning them down when they invite me out to eat all the time?

    The are jealous...they will get over it.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Anyway, any tips for turning them down when they invite me out to eat all the time?

    Is simply saying "Thanks for the invite, but I brought my lunch" not an option?

    If they are very pushy, then I'd probably just go with "My food tastes better and doesn't cost nearly as much". And if they were really, obnoxious, something like "WTF is your deal? I said I didn't want to go. Back off."
  • ChaplainHeavin
    ChaplainHeavin Posts: 426 Member
    In 45 minutes my co-workers are throwing a birthday banana split birthday party for me and another guy. I don't really care for sweets but wouldn't indulge in it anyway, may just have a scoop of ice cream. They will try to get me to have more, I'll just say no thank you.
  • diamier
    diamier Posts: 66 Member
    I would thank them for the invite and then just say "No thanks, I brought my own lunch today". I'd be really careful not to annoy them with too much of the "I am eating healthy now", "I made some lifestyle changes" talk....The less annoyed they are about it, the faster they will stop rolling their eyes and just accept the new you. A piece of advise though, maybe once a week or every other week, take them up on their offer so you do not alienate them. After all, they are the people that you spend most of your day around, you don't want them to start excluding you.
    This is true. Just keep in mind that they also need to get used to your new choices and I agree that those people, who force their lifestyles or religion etc. to others are really annoying, so don't be one of them.
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    I just tell them it's fasting time for the church of iron.

    LOL!! Love it!!
  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,855 Member
    Unless you make a lot of comments about their diets, or you have a holier than thou attitude about your diet, it's doubtful that everyone cares enough to, well....care what you are eating. Keep your diet to yourself, say no to going out and let it be. If you really need an excuse to say no, saving money is a great one.

    But, seriously, most people couldn't care less about other people's diets unless that diet is being discussed on the regular.

    This. . I'm sorry. .but all that "eye rolling" and "dirty looks" is in your head. . Just keep doing what you're doing and don't feel so self-conscious about it!. . And why not go with them. . say. . once a week. . (you say they go everyday). . You'll get some time socializing with all these judgemental people and you can order a salad to really piss them off!
  • Thanks guys!
    Im def not pushy about it to other people… i might talk about working out and eating too much now tho lol
    I guess I'm just gonna keep politely declining, and ignoring the eye rolls. I will also make sure not to decline EVERY time, i do like them, they just have no interest in being healthy at this point in their lives.
  • TKhamvongsa
    TKhamvongsa Posts: 287
    I work with opposites - they're so enthusiastic about it that they bring their own blenders to make their protein shakes at work (they even offer to make it for everyone) LOL makes me want to bring in a hot stove top and make everyone food
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    "No thanks, I'm on an epic weight loss journey and that is what I would consider sabotage"
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    I haven't experienced this exact problem, usually in the past when I worked in offices everyone was on different diets and would bicker/brag about how their fad diet or shakes etc were the best way to lose...and in 3-4 years everyone looked exactly the same so I guess they were all wrong ;-)

    Anyway...how I handle this with some of my non-health conscious friends and family is by explaining that I track my food, eat healthier, etc, but I usually tell them that I DO make exceptions. For me, going out for buffalo wings or McDonald's or Pizza Hut is totally not worth it and I won't "spend" my calories (or $$) on that. But if they're headed to the Thai, sushi, or Mexican restaurants I love, then count me in. They know my "weaknesses" which aren't really even weaknesses because I still stay within my calories.

    Same thing with holiday treats. I think I am pretty gracious about refusing certain things and then going for 1-2 delicious items that are truly "worth it" to me...and I fully admit that sometimes I do make a little spectacle of myself saying things like "OMG peanut butter fudge you are my soulmate" or something ridiculous along those lines...but I think for some people around me it makes them laugh and they're less offended that I didn't try their fried chicken cream cheese crescent roll appetizer, kwim?

    I know this is a little bit more of a compromise and it doesn't sound like that is what you are necessarily seeking...but that's how I handle it.
  • bethlaf
    bethlaf Posts: 954 Member
    All the above . I am sorry I didn't recall asking you to eat My lunch, with the most shocked offended look on your face,

    Food Snark is an office thing , I will say office politics may require you to go with them for lunch once in a while, plan for it and account for it , you should be fine
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
    My experience is that people will eventually get used to what you do and stop making comments or asking you to eat things you'd rather not. At the beginning of my weight loss/fitness efforts, people would offer, and offer and offer...

    Now, if there's a potluck or lunch order in the works, they offer and let it go. Most people know that I bring my own lunch and plan my daily food. It takes some pretty good stuff to sway me from my plan. They don't take it personally and they don't question what I'm doing. The way I eat and the choices I make at work are a permanent part of who I am. The longer you eat the way you're eating right now, the less others will care.
  • dym123
    dym123 Posts: 1,670 Member
    Unless you make a lot of comments about their diets, or you have a holier than thou attitude about your diet, it's doubtful that everyone cares enough to, well....care what you are eating. Keep your diet to yourself, say no to going out and let it be. If you really need an excuse to say no, saving money is a great one.

    But, seriously, most people couldn't care less about other people's diets unless that diet is being discussed on the regular.

    This. . I'm sorry. .but all that "eye rolling" and "dirty looks" is in your head. . Just keep doing what you're doing and don't feel so self-conscious about it!. . And why not go with them. . say. . once a week. . (you say they go everyday). . You'll get some time socializing with all these judgemental people and you can order a salad to really piss them off!

    Sorry, but I'm gonna have to disagree. I get comments all the time. If I turn down something sweet, I get..."you're skinny now, you can eat what you want" or if someone sees me cutting up my apple in the breakroom, its "how much more weight you want to lose?" or "still eating healthy?" A couple of weeks ago, at my grandmother's 90th birthday party, I got comments about how much I was eating, or if it was OK for me to eat a certain food. At no time did I comment on what anyone else was eating. I do not preach my healthy lifestyle, I don't make comments about what others eat, but for some reason people thinks its ok to make comments about what I eat. This is very real.

    For the OP, just say no thank you. You don't need an excuse or give a reason. Just say no.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,992 Member
    I share an office with 3 people who are SO not about the healthy life. They eat out daily and give me dirty looks about my healthy eating.. Not to mention the 30 other people at the work place who roll their eyes at my brown rice and chicken in the break room… Anyway, any tips for turning them down when they invite me out to eat all the time?
    It's great that you want to eat more nutritiously, but eating out daily DOESN'T mean one is unhealthy. I eat out at least 3 times a week. Not to mention you may not know what they are really eating or how they eat at home.
    If you don't want to go out, just say no. They'll stop asking you out after enough of them.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,992 Member
    Unless you make a lot of comments about their diets, or you have a holier than thou attitude about your diet, it's doubtful that everyone cares enough to, well....care what you are eating. Keep your diet to yourself, say no to going out and let it be. If you really need an excuse to say no, saving money is a great one.

    But, seriously, most people couldn't care less about other people's diets unless that diet is being discussed on the regular.
    THIS. People who are convinced that people have attitudes about what they eat, are usually the ones who preach to others about how to eat.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,992 Member
    No thank u and Im trying to get my body healthy
    Wrong answer. You're implying to them that they aren't healthy and they are going about it all wrong.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    Like someone else said, just because people eat out doesn't mean they aren't making reasonably healthy choices.

    If you're certain they're all "behaving badly", then repeat as often as necessary "No thanks, I brought my lunch".

    Otherwise start suggesting places to go where you know you can find things that are "food journal friendly".
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    Unless you make a lot of comments about their diets, or you have a holier than thou attitude about your diet, it's doubtful that everyone cares enough to, well....care what you are eating. Keep your diet to yourself, say no to going out and let it be. If you really need an excuse to say no, saving money is a great one.

    But, seriously, most people couldn't care less about other people's diets unless that diet is being discussed on the regular.

    I keep quiet about what I do, but my coworkers see me eating all day long (take a look at my diary). So, I don't invite the discussion, but it always seems to find me. And it's almost always followed up with "naturally thin," "young metabolism," and/or "just wait til you're 40." I guess this could go both ways lol
  • Sometimes you can find someone you work with who is trying to lose weight too and you can usually support each other! That sucks that at your work place everyone is a frigid b****! Just do what you have to do to reach your goals and when you do, and they ask you, "OMG how did you do it!?" I would remind them of the dirty looks they gave you when you DID make those smart choices to get to where you are! Rub it in their face!
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    "No thanks, I'm on an epic weight loss gurney and that is what I would consider sabotage"

    Fixed your spelling
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    The thing is- when you start making choices- or turning down food- it becomes personal- so if you are making comments about "trying to eat healthy and what not" people take it further.

    I try to cage my responses based on what I'm getting- I am clear about what I do- and I reserve the "If I want to look like you- I'd eat like you" comments for the people who are extremely push and rude about.

    What people struggle with most for me is the fact that one day I'm eating every thing in site- and the next day I'm not eating hardly anything and I've got pre-weighed food etc etc... this concept seems completely foreign to them- so it takes some adjusting.

    I also find- goals- if you are bringing up goals it helps drive the conversation and shift away from teh food itself.

    like- i'm trying to put on weight- god say that as a woman and it's like you have 3 eyes. Well- I need to get bigger so I can have better lifts- I'm doing X with my lifting. So my food is supporting that.

    or- I'm doing a lot of lifting- but I Need to drop body fat so I'm being more particular with my food so i can get X look but still maintain Y lifts.

    goes a long way it seems.. .and it makes people feel less uncomfortable about the "I'm trying to eat healthier" reverse judgement that they bring to that when someone starts declining food.
  • allaboutthecake
    allaboutthecake Posts: 1,535 Member
    Just bring your own lunch with you and go out with them. The café really won't care. You can order a beverage and eat your own out of your sack. If its a microwaveable, then that wouldn't work. I have done that before, brought my own lunch and sat with a group of coworkers while they ate fast food or something along that line.

    I used to get ragged on cuz I wouldn't eat any store-bought cakes brought in. They backed off of me when I told em I was leaving more cake for them to have :laugh: