HOW DO I TELL THE HUSBAND TO SHUT UP WITH OUT BEING MEAN!!!!

lmmathis86
lmmathis86 Posts: 223 Member
in Motivation and Support
Nevermind I'm going to say i'm sorry. I realized I over reacted and took **** personal!
«13

Replies

  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Yeah, after that tirade I'll bet he was done talking about your weight! Seriously, the man made you a burger and fries. Asked you if you needed more. And asked a fairly benign question about how much weight you had gained back.

    I'm not sure I am seeing the problem here...
  • lmmathis86
    lmmathis86 Posts: 223 Member
    Because it was all said with sarcasm..and meaness!
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    Seems like your diet plan, when you stick to it, is not enjoyable to you at all.

    What are you setting your cals to? And why can't you eat after 6pm?
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Don't worry, I doubt he'll be mentioning your weight loss one way or the other after that.
  • leantool
    leantool Posts: 365 Member
    He is helping you, by not sugar coating it!
  • Madame_Goldbricker
    Madame_Goldbricker Posts: 1,625 Member
    It's fine to eat past 6pm *skips out*
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  • margannmks
    margannmks Posts: 424 Member
    Men typically are wired to fix things,what we see as critical talk is often just them trying to help,it may come off as insensitive but if your always bemoaning how fat and out of shape you are (not saying your doing that just an example) hes just trying to fix what he hears is wrong with you. It also sounds like your being defensive and hes reacting to that. Weightloss is very personal and the less you share of your frustrations with him the better. Just do what you need to do to stay on track and be thankful when he notices but dont point it out or ask for his help. Its your battle.
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
    Maybe you should stop talking to him about it. Maybe you could focus some time on figuring out and meeting his needs instead of worrying about how much he falls short of meeting yours.
  • sweetcurlz67
    sweetcurlz67 Posts: 1,168 Member
    I totally understand where you're coming from. Thankfully, I'm no longer in such a relationship. But for you, just remember... you're doing this for YOU!!! Also remember that maybe his intent was not sarcastic but you took it that way, but if he's anything like my ex, forget it! The intent was there.

    Also know that even when you go back full force, cheat days are ok. Don't beat yourself up, just get back and start again no matter what anyone says.
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
    It's fine to eat past 6pm *skips out*

    Lol:). Hey ! Come back here and explain yourself young lady!
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Yeah... What a sucky boyfriend to cook you food and ask if you want more. :noway:

    Also, not sure why you are on such a restrictive diet in the first place.
  • snazzyjazzy21
    snazzyjazzy21 Posts: 1,298 Member
    Tell him to stfu.
  • lmmathis86
    lmmathis86 Posts: 223 Member
    Wow thanks for all your replys...maybe i'm just over reacting! I dont eat pass 6pm cause when I do I dont see weight loss.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Wow thanks for all your replys...maybe i'm just over reacting! I dont eat pass 6pm cause when I do I dont see weight loss.

    Meal timing is irrelevant.
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  • jayliospecky
    jayliospecky Posts: 25,022 Member
    Send him an email and type the subject in all caps.

    He'll know you mean business.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Wow thanks for all your replys...maybe i'm just over reacting! I dont eat pass 6pm cause when I do I dont see weight loss.

    Meal timing is irrelevant.

    Maybe. Maybe not.

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23357955

    I know for myself, I lose weight if I don't eat after 5pm, even if my calorie intake stays the same.
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
    Because it was all said with sarcasm..and meaness!

    tumblr_lwdmj3738P1qzgpx9.gif
  • lion87655
    lion87655 Posts: 1
    Honestly? Your husband sounds like an *kitten*. If the person I was with ever said anything like that to me, that would be the last thing they said to me for several days. I mean, sounds like a round 'bout way of calling you fat or like he's afraid you're going to 'get fat' again. I have no advice for you except to just tell him what an *kitten* he was for saying something so mean and that if he wants to be supporting to you, that is fine but he can't and won't be able to shame you into eating healthy/working out.
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    um.
  • lmmathis86
    lmmathis86 Posts: 223 Member
    Send him an email and type the subject in all caps.

    He'll know you mean business.

    lol....no he wouldnt....he would just talk more!
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    Wow thanks for all your replys...maybe i'm just over reacting! I dont eat pass 6pm cause when I do I dont see weight loss.

    Meal timing is irrelevant.

    Maybe. Maybe not.

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23357955

    I know for myself, I lose weight if I don't eat after 5pm, even if my calorie intake stays the same.

    Hehe... If I didn't eat past 6pm...id be starving, grumpy, mean, and overall a horrible person to be around.

    Oh, I would be miserable!
  • FindingAmy77
    FindingAmy77 Posts: 1,268 Member
    mine says things like this but I don't take it as mean. I mean he is my best friend and has the front row seat to my journey so I take it in stride and if he says something I don't like then I take it as a little hard to take truth. I think back to before when I had gained all this weight back that I am losing again and he never said anything about me overdoing it or quiting working out and I wonder why he never said anything. Often I tell him to keep me on track, so even if I don't want to hear it. I did ask for it. I am sure he is only stating the obvious. Cheer up. he cares.

    edit: I think it has helped me have him see what I do and what I look at on these forums or watch on youtube for motivation. Men have their own view on what helps and don't get it unless you explain it to them what works for you.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    Wow thanks for all your replys...maybe i'm just over reacting! I dont eat pass 6pm cause when I do I dont see weight loss.

    Meal timing is irrelevant.

    Maybe. Maybe not.

    http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23357955

    I know for myself, I lose weight if I don't eat after 5pm, even if my calorie intake stays the same.

    *shrug* I eat late and I get grumpy when I can't have my snacks.
  • rachsoderberg
    rachsoderberg Posts: 55 Member
    Maybe don't go a week without working out and eating right, and he'll realize you're serious about it. I do agree that a cheat day here and there is good and healthy, but a cheat week? Not so much... You admitted yourself that you've put on weight, he asked how much you put back on. Men like substantial facts like numbers, I don't think it was meant as an insult. I get the feeling everything he said was said with the intent to make you realize that you had slipped, because as someone else said... guys are wired to fix things. He knows your issue is lack of exercise and eating unhealthy, so he pointed it out bluntly (women could do well to learn this skill, we beat around the bush too much with feelings and junk).
  • Charlottesometimes23
    Charlottesometimes23 Posts: 687 Member
    I wish my DH would make me a burger and fries.
  • lmmathis86
    lmmathis86 Posts: 223 Member
    staple divorse papers to his forehead

    That would be over reacting....and I dont believe in divorce in less he cheats. I just want him to get that he dosent have to be mean to make his point.
  • 1princesswarrior
    1princesswarrior Posts: 1,242 Member
    Maybe before you beat up your husband so much you should learn more about accurate logging. Just my opinion though.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    I wish my DH would make me a burger and fries.

    For reals!!

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