If you're looking for weight loss help read this..

TracieJ65

WTF is it about Sunday's here??? One of these pops up every single Sunday lately. I should probably have stuck with my initial reaction to just ignore this, but I am really, really offended! Let me just say, I AM LOSING WEIGHT AND I DO NOT LIE! (my diary is only open to my friends list!) With that said, I had my diary open to the public in the first few months AND THEN there was a person that was just sporadically going through peoples food diaries and then criticizing what they were eating through some pretty nasty posts! BAM, my diary went private right then. That is most certainly not why people are on here, to randomly be judged and criticized!!!

What was going through your head to possibly make you actually take the time to type such a post? Plus, I see you have been a part of MFP for all of ONE WHOLE MONTH so that just must makes you the absolute person who knows it all about being serious about losing weight. Wow, I will just chalk this up to you being a person who likes to cause trouble! More power to you, keep it off of here.

And by the way, Amarillo_NDN, you don't know me, but I would be included in your "hide behind a pet's picture." So, that give me cause to defend myself against your less than supportive post. Maybe I love my pets and I would rather have their picture over one of me. Maybe I don't have a picture of me because I am the one who is always taking them, but who knows? That is the F---ing point, you don't know so keep it to yourself. Also, I look at myself in the mirror every single day and know exactly what I see and since I will "assume" you meant to type, "never be able to see what they need to" and not "never be able to what they need to" I will tell you I "SEE" exactly what I need to.

I just wonder if the two of you, deshaine and Amarillo_NDN, look in the mirror and can be proud of the actual person you are when you can type the kind of posts that you chose to post tonight.

THERE, MY RANT OFF..................................

HerbieSue

I agree with you. Also for me, it people who hid behind pictures of kids on their profile or animals. Untill they can except who they are and allow others to see them, they will always hide in the dark and will never be able to what they need to.

OUCH!!!! I was just excited to show off my new puppy!!!

socalledauthor

If my diary was public, I'd be more inclined to lie or omit items than if it's private. Keeping it private means that I can be honest with myself since I don't have to feel scrutinized in any way for my mistakes. I've endured enough scrutiny (usually with commentary) that I'm kind of hypersensitive about it. And it's not because of years of poor choices... but rather I've been receiving unwelcome comments on my eating habits because I've been at exactly the appropriate BMI for my height and therefore deemed "too skinny" or scolded for not eating "enough" by too many people around me.

I do realize you've clarified your post and that you were more referring to people who ask for help, but if I were to ask for help, for example, with my own issues, I would only ask for general ideas. That would be much more comfortable for me than to be specific and risk even more commentary on my specific eating choices. With general advice, I can pick and choose what applies to me with a very low risk of getting stung yet again.

Just offering another perspective on the situation.

nursevee

If my diary was public, I'd be more inclined to lie or omit items than if it's private. Keeping it private means that I can be honest with myself since I don't have to feel scrutinized in any way for my mistakes. I've endured enough scrutiny (usually with commentary) that I'm kind of hypersensitive about it.

When I first started I had my diary public. I thought it would make me feel more accountable to my food choices because people could see what I was eating. It didn't... It made me shy away from my bad days, I felt like I was regressing rather than progressing because I was lying. If I had a really bad day I'd just not log in and that would make me fall back into a pattern and i'd gain weight etc etc.

This time around I made it private. I took the lead from one of my friends who said that an individuals food plan is their business only. Different styles of eating, different intakes and different workout schedules work for different people. The only reason people come here is to lose or maintain weight (or pershaps get ready for an important fitness event where they need to be conscious of their intake/output etc. All we need is support and not evaluation. SO far I have done really really well. I log every day, have lost weight. I have my great days and I have my not so great days and that's all part of it because when I reach my goal and I'm onto the maintenance part, I will know how to handle temptation and the odd blow-out. I even believe that they're good for the soul!

You might work better with your diary on public and that's great but not everyone is in the same boat. If people ask for help, they usually pose a fairly direct question and don't then need a full rundown of what they should or should be eating. If you find this type of question from a private diarist silly then I'd simply encourage you to move onto the next topic as though you'd never read it. This really isn't a place for negaive or useless commentary. Sometimes we all feel better for putting someone "in their place" but as I've said to my Volleyball players "Until you're a star player and are not making any mistakes, don't bring anyone else down. We're all a team, playing the same game and encouragement is the best way to achieve."

Regardless of all this, there was absolutely a much better way of wording this because it lacked the basic respect we all should have for an individual's decisions. After all, I wouldn't find the largest woman in the food court and go up to her and loudly ask her "Why are you eating a super sized Double Quarter Pounder meal?" and that is roughly how you worded your original post. It was like you were calling out all the private diarists and putting them on display.

Hope you have read people's responses and have taken it on board.

caterpillar2Butterfly

Mmmm I love everything pumpkin pie, and if its low in calories thats even better..
**STAMPS FOOT**

This thread has had over 1200 views! And very few people have viewed my thread for Pumpkin Pie Muffins. *sniff* Its far more worthy of views! Its a yummy recipe!

Seriously folks, deshaine is on my friends list and as far as she and I go, we are over it and have moved on. Besides, I have a few friends like her in real life.....and we get into verbal battles sometimes....but then they realize I'm right and they bow to me and all is well. JUST KIDDING!

Now yall go look at my pumpkin pie muffin recipe and make some this week. You'll love them! Get crackin!

caterpillar2Butterfly

WTF is it about Sunday's here??? One of these pops up every single Sunday lately. I should probably have stuck with my initial reaction to just ignore this, but I am really, really offended! Let me just say, I AM LOSING WEIGHT AND I DO NOT LIE! (my diary is only open to my friends list!) With that said, I had my diary open to the public in the first few months AND THEN there was a person that was just sporadically going through peoples food diaries and then criticizing what they were eating through some pretty nasty posts! BAM, my diary went private right then. That is most certainly not why people are on here, to randomly be judged and criticized!!!

What was going through your head to possibly make you actually take the time to type such a post? Plus, I see you have been a part of MFP for all of ONE WHOLE MONTH so that just must makes you the absolute person who knows it all about being serious about losing weight. Wow, I will just chalk this up to you being a person who likes to cause trouble! More power to you, keep it off of here.

And by the way, Amarillo_NDN, you don't know me, but I would be included in your "hide behind a pet's picture." So, that give me cause to defend myself against your less than supportive post. Maybe I love my pets and I would rather have their picture over one of me. Maybe I don't have a picture of me because I am the one who is always taking them, but who knows? That is the F---ing point, you don't know so keep it to yourself. Also, I look at myself in the mirror every single day and know exactly what I see and since I will "assume" you meant to type, "never be able to see what they need to" and not "never be able to what they need to" I will tell you I "SEE" exactly what I need to.

I just wonder if the two of you, deshaine and Amarillo_NDN, look in the mirror and can be proud of the actual person you are when you can type the kind of posts that you chose to post tonight.

THERE, MY RANT OFF..................................

caterpillar2Butterfly

people like that (judgementel) is the reason I have mine private! if I am asking for help then I will open it to those who Want to help but putting other people down when they already may not feel at there best is just mean and probably not happy in there own lives that they need to put others down to make themselfs feel better..

Lulu2929

Not very supportive. Everyone is different and we all have various levels of needs for privacy. If someone doesn't want to publish their diary - it's their business, You shouldn't assume things about why others do things.

mizfit

**STAMPS FOOT**

This thread has had over 1200 views! And very few people have viewed my thread for Pumpkin Pie Muffins. *sniff* Its far more worthy of views! Its a yummy recipe!

Seriously folks, deshaine is on my friends list and as far as she and I go, we are over it and have moved on. Besides, I have a few friends like her in real life.....and we get into verbal battles sometimes....but then they realize I'm right and they bow to me and all is well. JUST KIDDING!

Now yall go look at my pumpkin pie muffin recipe and make some this week. You'll love them! Get crackin!

Yum Yum....Pumpkin Pie Muffins. I'm going to check out your thread right now.

brice02

I agree with you completly, we are here for positive support!

Raychel_xoxo

I think you're full of crap, and have a nasty attitude as well.
Your supposed "lack of clarification" just offended so many people. Which goes to show me not only are you a disrespectful person, but also a judgmental person. I feel bad for anybody else here that you will attempt to give advice to, and just hurt and offend them in the process.

LuckyLeprechaun

I personally don't have a picture of myself as my profile pic, b/c I'd rather not post pictures of myself on the internet.

THIS.

And, do you know how many people I have made friends with just because they love looking at my adorable dog?

You want to look at my diary? Tough noogies. What I eat and what I look like are details that I may choose to share or NOT, as I see fit. I don't owe anybody on the internet ANYTHING.

joezepi3

I like to look at other people's diaries, not to judge, but to get food/meal ideas. I tend to look at the folks that are a similar size who's meters are showing weight loss and success. It's also helpful to see their calories burned through exercise and how it relates to their calorie intake. This is for my personal benefit and is valuable information.

Never once have I sent anyone my own advise or have been judgmental. It's not my place and my opinion wasn't asked for.

Joe

sunlover67

I think the biggest (or one of the biggest) problems with this post was the title. I was expecting a food or exercise tip or something similar, as those are the reasons i am on this site. We are all on here for different reasons. I personally don't have any weight to lose, but healthy eating and exercise are very important to me and I get a wealth of information on those topics on this sight. But I am also a private person, as you can see I have no profile pic and didn't even really fill the profile out. But I didn't feel I needed to to share info/recipes, etc on healthy eating and exercise. And I did take offense to the why dont' we have our profile pics posted. Mine is certainly not b/c I'm embarrassed by what I look like. I think she could have worded things a little differently, which hopefully she has learned from all the responses that she should. That said, now I'm going to check out the pumpkin pie muffin recipe.

shellishell

Just my.02 - regardless of the delivery, I can see a bit of the poster's point. When I see that someone has been successful at losing weight, I like looking at their diary for food/meal ideas and how their choices relate to their exercise & success. However, I guess there are some people that would be judgemental to the public diary but since we are all here to help others, I wouldnt think that would happen??

To each his own and I definitely don't think anyone should be criticized for their choice of keeping the diary private, but it is helpful for those of us struggling to see what works for others.

Shelli
5'4
CW 138
GW 127

HealthyChanges2010

There is being supportive and there is bullying; I believe your post is tantamount to bullying and is unlikely to achieve anything., let alone the help and support you purport to be giving.

Very well put!

Perhaps the OP & several fellow bullies needs a cookie :frown: & to seriously chill out, if you don't eat enough cals back, crankiness is what comes back to bite you in the butt I sometimes wonder if some of these uglier posts are from ppl not getting enough of their cals in?

cutmd

I don't think the OP meant as much harm as people are reading into it. She just made the case for "putting it all out there", like an alcoholic needs to stand up at AA and admit they are one. I think there is something to be said for it. When I work out in public or someone at home is watching me, I make sure I bring my A game. She did say, "if you're looking for weight loss help", and I think it is a tip that may help people.

I'm surprised it triggered so much emotion, frankly. Let's all forgive and forget? I'd love to make pumpkin pie muffins if there's a gluten free version :flowerforyou:

maroon58

i kept mine private at first because i am a private person and it was a big step for me to make it public. i don't have my face as my avatar, i am ocd about putting my personal info out on the internet. i am not 'hiding' behind anything. i am just not comfortable to have my face floating around.

toots99

**STAMPS FOOT**

This thread has had over 1200 views! And very few people have viewed my thread for Pumpkin Pie Muffins. *sniff* Its far more worthy of views! Its a yummy recipe!

:laugh: :laugh:

ActionJackson

Wow... 16 pages without invoking Godwin's law. I'm impressed.

HealthyChanges2010

Wow... 16 pages without invoking Godwin's law. I'm impressed.

:laugh: :laugh: good point!

Game Over:smokin:

NeuroticVirgo

I think if someone is going to ask questions like "why am I not losing weight"...or "What am I doing wrong"...but have their diary set to private...then its annoying to people who are trying to help them. I asked a similar questions...and got some good answers...mostly about my sodium and water...some answers could have been put a bit nicer, but they were all valid points, and I asked for it.

To me, asking for help but having a private food diary is like going to the doctor and not telling them why you are there...they just aren't going to be able to help you.

NeuroticVirgo

**STAMPS FOOT**

This thread has had over 1200 views! And very few people have viewed my thread for Pumpkin Pie Muffins. *sniff* Its far more worthy of views! Its a yummy recipe!

Seriously folks, deshaine is on my friends list and as far as she and I go, we are over it and have moved on. Besides, I have a few friends like her in real life.....and we get into verbal battles sometimes....but then they realize I'm right and they bow to me and all is well. JUST KIDDING!

Now yall go look at my pumpkin pie muffin recipe and make some this week. You'll love them! Get crackin!

I can't find your pumpkin pie recipe

HealthyChanges2010

**STAMPS FOOT**

This thread has had over 1200 views! And very few people have viewed my thread for Pumpkin Pie Muffins. *sniff* Its far more worthy of views! Its a yummy recipe!

Seriously folks, deshaine is on my friends list and as far as she and I go, we are over it and have moved on. Besides, I have a few friends like her in real life.....and we get into verbal battles sometimes....but then they realize I'm right and they bow to me and all is well. JUST KIDDING!

Now yall go look at my pumpkin pie muffin recipe and make some this week. You'll love them! Get crackin!

I can't find your pumpkin pie recipe

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/126092-pumpkin-pie-muffins?hl=pumpkin+pie+muffins#posts-1712909:flowerforyou:

NeuroticVirgo

woot! Thanks, when I read that, I was like ooo those sound sooo yummy.