Husband says he liked me weighing more?

manningania
manningania Posts: 52 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
My husband and I had a discussion last night, he says he wants for me to weigh 140-160 lbs ( currently I am 95 lbs) . Is this to get me to gain more weight or do men actually not care for "skinny"?
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Replies

  • Veropal
    Veropal Posts: 9 Member
    Hi,
    Have you always been thin? 95 sure is thin, and 140-160 is a huge JUMP from 95. How tall are you???????
    From my experience men don't like super duper skinny. Depends on guy! :)
  • manningania
    manningania Posts: 52 Member
    Hi,
    Have you always been thin? 95 sure is thin, and 140-160 is a huge JUMP from 95. How tall are you???????
    From my experience men don't like super duper skinny. Depends on guy! :)
    Yeah I was just a staring to fall in the overweight category when we were getting married at 160 and I am 5'6 lol
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    95lb at 5ft6 is very very slim... i am 5ft5 and 136lbs, i would look dead if i lost 40lbs.
  • kshadows
    kshadows Posts: 1,315 Member
    Uh..I think you might be the one with the problem. 95 pounds is MINIATURE, especially for 5'6. I'm 5'5.5 and my most comfortable weight is around 130-135. Do you know your BF%? Maybe you need to check with a doctor to figure out what's healthiest for you.
  • erickirb
    erickirb Posts: 12,294 Member
    Hi,
    Have you always been thin? 95 sure is thin, and 140-160 is a huge JUMP from 95. How tall are you???????
    From my experience men don't like super duper skinny. Depends on guy! :)
    Yeah I was just a staring to fall in the overweight category when we were getting married at 160 and I am 5'6 lol

    Wow, 95lbs at 5'6" is severely underweight, like scary. 120-140 would be "normal"
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,211 Member
    95 at 5'6 is a lot underweight...
  • mariposa224
    mariposa224 Posts: 1,241 Member
    Hi,
    Have you always been thin? 95 sure is thin, and 140-160 is a huge JUMP from 95. How tall are you???????
    From my experience men don't like super duper skinny. Depends on guy! :)
    Yeah I was just a staring to fall in the overweight category when we were getting married at 160 and I am 5'6 lol
    At 5'6" and 95 lbs, you're seriously underweight. You should probably see a doctor... And gain some of the weight back in a healthy way.
  • kshadows
    kshadows Posts: 1,315 Member

    Yeah I was just a staring to fall in the overweight category when we were getting married at 160 and I am 5'6 lol

    160 at 5'6 is barely overweight, you are right but 95 pounds at that height is VERY underweight.
  • kgeyser
    kgeyser Posts: 22,505 Member
    I'm going to leave this here: http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org
  • pearson114
    pearson114 Posts: 66 Member
    You are you... do what makes you happy.

    I have had relationships with 'skinny' women and larger women. There are differences between the two but the only difference that really mattered was how they felt, as their feelings were reflected in their everyday personality.

    If you are happy, your husband should respect that. :)

    Have a nice day.
  • _Zardoz_
    _Zardoz_ Posts: 3,987 Member
    If those figures are correct and your 5'6 and 95 pounds your husband is right and you need help. You are unhealthily under weight with a BMI of 15. Listen to your Husband and go and get some professional help
  • TX_Rhon
    TX_Rhon Posts: 1,549 Member
    I agree with the rest of the posters - 95lbs is too thin! It's about healthy, not skinny. Good luck to you :flowerforyou:
  • martinel2099
    martinel2099 Posts: 899 Member
    You sound very underweight. I'd strongly recommend talking to your doctor / nutritionist and consider gaining weight in a healthy way and consider building some muscle. You'll look and feel good.
  • BoxerBrawler
    BoxerBrawler Posts: 2,032 Member
    I am 5'5" and weigh 115 and have been told all kinds of things e.g., I'm too thin, skeletal, anorexic, sick, etc. My husband would also like me to put 10 or 15 pounds back on. Bottom line is I have done this for me and not for anyone else. I don't really give a crap what anyone thinks of me... I like what I see when I look in the mirror and that's what counts.

    If you have to ask... than maybe you're doubting that you look good at your height and weight.

    I know that my body looks and feels the best between 115 and 120. Any lower than 115 and I look and feel sick.
  • _Zardoz_
    _Zardoz_ Posts: 3,987 Member
    If you are happy, your husband should respect that. :)

    Have a nice day.
    So her Husband should respect that she is putting her health at risk. Hmm Now that's a weird take on a marriage. When I was Morbidly Obese my wife told me she feared for my health she told me because she loved me.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    I'm going to leave this here: http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org

    This.
  • KseRz
    KseRz Posts: 980 Member
    95? Yikes! @ 5'6"?

    I believe the last time I weighed that was in elementary school.

    Please go get something to eat, ill inbox you some Jimmy Johns coupons.
  • 4daluvof_candice
    4daluvof_candice Posts: 483 Member
    Yeah I was just a staring to fall in the overweight category when we were getting married at 160 and I am 5'6 lol

    I'm 5"6. Per BMI, our healthy weight range is 124.9-154.9, I beleive. The smallest Ive ever been is 164lbs with BF% of 28, in my military days.

    95lbs :noway:
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,654 Member
    Yes, I agree with others above. 95 is way too thin for your height. You may have gotten a bit carried away with the dieting. How about splitting the difference and shoot for around 130-135?
  • ahamm002
    ahamm002 Posts: 1,690 Member
    Your husband is worried because you definitely have an eating disorder. You're SEVERELY underweight. You need to see a doctor ASAP, and preferably get into some sort of program for eating disorders.
  • amyj514
    amyj514 Posts: 53 Member
    My sister and I are the same height and if we look like we're in the same shape, she is easily 10 lbs lighter than me. Some people are just lighter than others. I would suggest based on your height, try taking it up to 120 and see how that feels. You might even wear 125 well. I'm 5'7" 133 lbs and that is comfortable to me.
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    95 pounds at 5'6", even at 21 years old, is WAY TOO THIN. It sounds like your husband has a genuine concern for your health.
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,654 Member
    You are you... do what makes you happy.

    I have had relationships with 'skinny' women and larger women. There are differences between the two but the only difference that really mattered was how they felt, as their feelings were reflected in their everyday personality.

    If you are happy, your husband should respect that. :)

    Have a nice day.

    Please DO NOT listen to the above advice. And please, no one else tell her she is fine at a BMI of 15. Heart failure could be right around the corner.
  • Anonycatgirl
    Anonycatgirl Posts: 502 Member
    Your husband may be talking about his aesthetic/sexual preference, but he may just be concerned about you. At 5'6" and 95 pounds, you're underweight in terms of your BMI. I know BMI isn't accurate for everyone and I didn't get a great sense of your build from your profile picture. You might be a fine-boned person who's healthy at a lower weight than the average. But working on the info available, it sounds like you let your weight go below a healthy level and you might want to consider what your husband has to say about gaining a little back. (Not the number he suggested, which is probably too curvy for you, but enough to get you to "slender but not starving.")
  • cebreisch
    cebreisch Posts: 1,340 Member
    I understand not wanting to get back up to 160, but 95 pounds for your height is really underweight.

    To me, Giuliana Ranci, as beautiful as she is, I think she's underweight too. I know she's got a regimen to keep herself fit and healthy, but our definitions are probably different, and that's okay. Personally, just think she would be SO MUCH prettier with about 5-10 more pounds or so on her. But that's me.

    It might be a good idea to check with a doctor, get a physical. If everything's working right, then don't worry about it. BUT sometimes when people get too thin, different organs won't work quite as well as they used to, and it's worth getting checked out.
  • ruffnstuff
    ruffnstuff Posts: 400 Member
    OP - listen and listen good. I took a gander at your posting history. On April 17 you actually posted a thread taht said "Hi, I'm anorexic." Ok, so you already know what all these posters are telling you. BUT, are you actually getting help? This is not the proper place to get the serious help you need. Posting a topic about why your husband wants you to gain weight is not what you need to focus on right now (hint: he is scared for your health and life, THAT's why he wants you to gain weight). If you ahve not already, you must seek serious medical attention for an eating disorder. NOW, please! Good luck to you.
  • 1pandabear
    1pandabear Posts: 336 Member
    My husband and I had a discussion last night, he says he wants for me to weigh 140-160 lbs ( currently I am 95 lbs) . Is this to get me to gain more weight or do men actually not care for "skinny"?

    Here is a website to calculate a healthy body mass index and also includes caveats for appropriate applications of the information
    http://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/guidelines/obesity/BMI/bmicalc.htm

    (It is for US National Institutes of Health, the major grantor of scientific research monies in the world.)
  • Grimmerick
    Grimmerick Posts: 3,342 Member
    Sounds like you are open to gaining the weight back which is wonderful, and half of the battle. Sounds like your hubby loves you and wants to see you healthy. Give him a little softness to squeeze, I'm sure he will love that and encourage it. You can gain weight in a healthy way and with the support of your hubs sounds like he will support you in maintaining a healthy weight too. Also think if you are that thin, your body is not getting nutrients it needs to make your bones strong, hair healthy and shiny, skin radiant etc etc, you might not notice now if you haven't weighed this little for long, but you will notice it will start to wear your body down. In the future you will feel even better, your hubs will feel better too. So good luck to ya!
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    OP - listen and listen good. I took a gander at your posting history. On April 17 you actually posted a thread taht said "Hi, I'm anorexic." Ok, so you already know what all these posters are telling you. BUT, are you actually getting help? This is not the proper place to get the serious help you need. Posting a topic about why your husband wants you to gain weight is not what you need to focus on right now (hint: he is scared for your health and life, THAT's why he wants you to gain weight). If you ahve not already, you must seek serious medical attention for an eating disorder. NOW, please! Good luck to you.

    QFT
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