Wife not confident with MFP. She only lost 2lbs in 2 weeks

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Replies

  • lavaughan69
    lavaughan69 Posts: 459 Member
    I've lost 52lbs and it took me a year...that's a pound a week. She probably figures that with working out and eating right she should see faster results but sometimes working out creates muscle repair and you tend to hold on some water weight when that happens. Slow and steady wins the race so just encourage her to stay focused on her food intake, that's going to be the key to her success.
  • neandermagnon
    neandermagnon Posts: 7,436 Member
    my advice to your wife is that 2lb in 2 weeks is excellent progress, in fact I'd say it's optimal progress for someone who wants to lose just 20lb. 2lb/week is too fast a rate of weight loss if you only have 20lb to lose... the less you have to lose the greater the risk of loss of lean mass, which in turn leads to the metabolism slowing, and increases the likelihood of regaining the weight again (only what you regain is 100% fat while what you lost was a combination of fat and muscle, so you end up with worse body composition than you started with).......... taking things slow and steady has other benefits as well, including the fact that if you're not torturing or depriving yourself, it's a lot easier to stick with the new habits for life. Reverting back to old habits = rebound fat gain.... so for both these reasons, if you try to lose the weight too quickly you're setting yourself up for rebound fat gain. If you go more slowly it's a lot more likely that the weight you're losing is 100% fat (you also need strength training and an adequate protein intake to protect against lean body mass loss) and more likely that you'll stick to it for life and quite a lot less likely that you'll regain the weight back again.

    tell her that this is not a race, the winner isn't the one who loses weight the quickest - the winner is everyone who stays at a healthy goal weight/body composition for life. She needs to focus on the long term, it doesn't matter that she's going to take longer to get there, what matters is that she has a better chance of staying at her goal weight for life if she loses the weight the slow, steady and sustainable way. And this way is the healthiest way too. So it's win win win all round - it just takes a little bit of patience as the rate of loss is slower.

    ETA: when she has only 10lb to lose she should change her goal for 0.5lb/week fat loss.
  • MityMax96
    MityMax96 Posts: 5,778 Member
    have to agree w/ the others.

    NEVER POST ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR WIFE AND HER WEIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Just don't
  • PinkyFett
    PinkyFett Posts: 842 Member
    1 lb a week is good. Maybe she's not eating enough. I'd be insanely grateful for a steady 1 lb a week loss. Some of us don't have it that good.
  • raven56706
    raven56706 Posts: 918 Member
    She has been following it to a T but something is keeping her back. Im not sure what it is but she needs some encouragement or advice. She has begun going to the gym 3 times a week but just going to classes.

    I dont think she is drinking enough water but not sure if thats the only thing. I also think since she isnt so fat, she isnt losing as much weight as other overweight people. But im not sure.

    If she's concerned with her progress, why isn't she posting to the forums? I know you probably think you're helping, but it's coming off as a little controlling. You are implying that 'just' going to classes at the gym isn't enough. You're guessing her water intake is to blame.

    You are right about one thing: she has less to lose, so she will lose it more slowly. I don't think it would be wise to try to figure out what she is doing "wrong." Even if you are trying to help alleviate her frustration, even if your heart is in the right place, it won't be as helpful as simply encouraging her to keep with her plan. She can hunt for answers on the forums for herself if she feels that she's not getting to where she wants to be.

    she is a teacher and never tries to check. You would think me being the success story would be enough confidence for her but i dont want her to get discouraged. I dont think she needs to force it but then again she wants to lose the weight not me. IM only asking for advice for her to not get her discouraged with her great progress. Im only helping her reach her goals. i dont think that means im controlling her which is crazy to say with just asking for advice for her.
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    where is your wife? is going to come in here and post or what?
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    She has been following it to a T but something is keeping her back. Im not sure what it is but she needs some encouragement or advice. She has begun going to the gym 3 times a week but just going to classes.

    I dont think she is drinking enough water but not sure if thats the only thing. I also think since she isnt so fat, she isnt losing as much weight as other overweight people. But im not sure.

    If she's concerned with her progress, why isn't she posting to the forums? I know you probably think you're helping, but it's coming off as a little controlling. You are implying that 'just' going to classes at the gym isn't enough. You're guessing her water intake is to blame.

    You are right about one thing: she has less to lose, so she will lose it more slowly. I don't think it would be wise to try to figure out what she is doing "wrong." Even if you are trying to help alleviate her frustration, even if your heart is in the right place, it won't be as helpful as simply encouraging her to keep with her plan. She can hunt for answers on the forums for herself if she feels that she's not getting to where she wants to be.

    she is a teacher and never tries to check. You would think me being the success story would be enough confidence for her but i dont want her to get discouraged. I dont think she needs to force it but then again she wants to lose the weight not me. IM only asking for advice for her to not get her discouraged with her great progress. Im only helping her reach her goals. i dont think that means im controlling her which is crazy to say with just asking for advice for her.

    If by this you mean she never comes on the forums or looks at your profile to see what topics you've posted then you may be safe..... may.
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  • Hendrix7
    Hendrix7 Posts: 1,903 Member
    op's next thread

    "hey any single ladies in here?"
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    I don't see the problem.

    Some women aren't big fans of being referred to as "not so fat". Especially to the whole world publicly.
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    She has been following it to a T but something is keeping her back. Im not sure what it is but she needs some encouragement or advice. She has begun going to the gym 3 times a week but just going to classes.

    I dont think she is drinking enough water but not sure if thats the only thing. I also think since she isnt so fat, she isnt losing as much weight as other overweight people. But im not sure.

    If she's concerned with her progress, why isn't she posting to the forums? I know you probably think you're helping, but it's coming off as a little controlling. You are implying that 'just' going to classes at the gym isn't enough. You're guessing her water intake is to blame.

    You are right about one thing: she has less to lose, so she will lose it more slowly. I don't think it would be wise to try to figure out what she is doing "wrong." Even if you are trying to help alleviate her frustration, even if your heart is in the right place, it won't be as helpful as simply encouraging her to keep with her plan. She can hunt for answers on the forums for herself if she feels that she's not getting to where she wants to be.

    she is a teacher and never tries to check. You would think me being the success story would be enough confidence for her but i dont want her to get discouraged. I dont think she needs to force it but then again she wants to lose the weight not me. IM only asking for advice for her to not get her discouraged with her great progress. Im only helping her reach her goals. i dont think that means im controlling her which is crazy to say with just asking for advice for her.

    If by this you mean she never comes on the forums or looks at your profile to see what topics you've posted then you may be safe..... may.

    Well, he did drop the F bomb when referring to her... chicks can smell that half the world away.
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  • Blacklance36
    Blacklance36 Posts: 755 Member
    1 lb a week is not bad...
    Tell her to be patient and keep on it.

    And if she ain't weighing/measuring her food w/ a scale, then she should start

    Just what I was thinking, that's a learning curve all by itself. Its also easy to forget something or to underestimate at the beginning of using MFP.
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    I don't see the problem.

    Some women aren't big fans of being referred to as "not so fat". Especially to the whole world publicly.

    With her weight loss

    Oh, that. Yeah. There's nothing wrong with her weight loss. If she even has any weight to lose (are you listening OP?)
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    With 20 pounds to lose, 1 pound per week is perfect progress!

    This
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    And since I have to go I'm going to drop a pre-emptive JBU for if/when the OP's wife shows up/starts her own thread.

    JBU
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    Give her a big hug and kiss and tell her she's doing a fantastic job and should stop being so hard on herself! There's no reason to be mad when you're meeting the set goal. And maybe ask why she's so upset - she may need to vent. I've got a sneaking suspicion that she's comparing herself to you or someone else in her life that lost a lot of weight quickly when they started dieting. The simple fact is that we all lose weight differently - especially women vs men.

    Re: the # of calories she gets per day. Is she short? That has a big impact on the number of calories you're given. If she doesn't feel like it's enough maybe she needs to set a higher activity level or set to lose 1/2 a pound per week rather than 1 pound?
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
    STOP TALKING ABOUT ME! :angry:
  • Crateria_
    Crateria_ Posts: 253 Member
    Mannn I'd be happy to lose 2 lbs in 2 weeks. Even a lb a week with only 20 to go would be fabulous. But it's not realistic or healthy.

    I've got 7 lbs to go and I'm losing about 2 lbs a month (maybe even only 1.5lbs). I'm not starving, I eat what I want in moderation, and I'm happy!

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    Show her this.
  • raven56706
    raven56706 Posts: 918 Member
    she is going to reply in a few. Love some of the funny posts here. Taking this way too seriuo
  • aldenxnedla
    aldenxnedla Posts: 26 Member
    Basically the same as everyone else is saying. MFP can't take every single person's dietary needs into account - it's just an average. She could just have a lower basal metabolic rate than is required to be able to lose that much weight that quickly, and 2 pounds a week is pushing towards unhealthy anyway. There are 2 things I can think of that may be the problem:

    1. Depending on where she is in her monthly cycle, she could be retaining water - that can add a surprising amount of weight that'll come off almost immediately once that time of the month is over.
    2. 1250 calories a day is a very low amount. I know, I shouldn't really be talking, because my daily goal is even lower than that, but I'm also trying to lose a lot more than 20 lbs. She could be putting her body into starvation mode, which will slow down her metabolism because her body is in shock from the huge calorie deficit and trying to hold onto every little bit that it can. This could be one of the cases where, to put a spin on a cliche, more could end up being less.

    Other than that, it's just a matter of being patient. I know that's probably not what she wants to hear, but losing weight is a frustrating process. Trust me, I know. Best of luck.
  • raven56706
    raven56706 Posts: 918 Member
    hahahaha.... so telling my wife she looks great and telling her she is doing a great job is bad. She then gets mad and wants to revert to the fad diets.

    So i come here to the place that helped me lose the weight and ask for advice to help her reach her realistic goals is a bad thing?

    come on people... im trying to help her before she reverts back to the diets that arent good for you.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    I know this sounds crazy but I have read and re-read OP's post and I just done see where it says she's losing 1lb per week.

    Bottom line... Calorie counting doesn't cut it for everyone. It is a way, and a very darn good and effective way, but it just doesn't work without obsession and insane un-sustainable deficits for some people.

    My honest advice: Give Low-Carb, High-Fat a fair two-three week run. She'll be shocked and excited. It will drop.
  • WaterBunnie
    WaterBunnie Posts: 1,371 Member
    It's probably more to do with being fresh to exercising than anything to do with her calories. She'll no doubt be retaining water to repair muscles and may well be losing more than 1lb of fat a week but it being hidden by her fitness progress. She'll start seeing a difference in the way her clothes fit soon and won't worry so much about the scale hopefully.

    If she's weighing food and tracking accurately tell her not to worry.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    she is going to reply in a few. Love some of the funny posts here. Taking this way too seriuo

    Awesome.

    So now that you've judged your wife's commitment/progress...

    ...now you can judge those responding for their appropriate level of seriousness.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    ok i got more info because i was wrong...


    she has it set to 1 lb a week. So she is getting her goal. I find it odd that 1lb a week is 1250 but i think its because of her body type. She isnt overweight.


    and SonicDeathMon... you should have seen her when she stepped on the scale. super angry.

    I'd just ask a mod to wipe this thread. Start posting offensive stuff or something bc seriously, she's gonna post about you posting this and get 100 recommendations from unhappy MFP wives for divorce.

    LOL

    :laugh:

    It's funny because it's true...


    ...because we've seen how those threads go.
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    she is going to reply in a few.

    Injured_player_eating_popcorn.gif
  • DopeItUp
    DopeItUp Posts: 18,771 Member
    So she's lost exactly the amount of weight she has her goal set to, and she's upset? What did she expect?

    Mainly I'm just here to see the hilariousness that is ensuing/will ensue.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    So she's lost exactly the amount of weight she has her goal set to, and she's upset? What did she expect?

    Mainly I'm just here to see the hilariousness that is ensuing/will ensue.

    Are you certain that it is *she* who is upset?



    I'm not.
  • aldenxnedla
    aldenxnedla Posts: 26 Member
    hahahaha.... so telling my wife she looks great and telling her she is doing a great job is bad. She then gets mad and wants to revert to the fad diets.

    So i come here to the place that helped me lose the weight and ask for advice to help her reach her realistic goals is a bad thing?

    come on people... im trying to help her before she reverts back to the diets that arent good for you.

    Well you asked for advice, this is what advice looks like. Sorry if it's not what you want to hear but it's realistic. No one's saying what she's doing is bad. We're just speaking from our own experience and saying what has worked and what hasn't. Losing weight isn't easy and it isn't quick. That doesn't mean it's impossible though.

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