RANT POST: I am NOT too skinny!

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NidiaG24
NidiaG24 Posts: 31 Member
in Goal: Maintaining Weight
I just need to vent a little. I am soooooo DAMN tired of ppl telling me I need to stop working out because I am already skinny. I am 176 lbs and 6 feet tall. It took me so long to be OK with myself and my "skinny" size when my entire family was big. There was something always wrong with me because I can't gain or keep weight on. These people are sounding like I am a size 0. I went from a size 12 to almost an 8. I am loving the fact that I see abs coming out, I see my core and arms are stronger. My calf is not jiggly and my Butt... my butt is uplifted. WHAT does these ppl want from me!. I am doing this for me not for them......... Grrrrrrr! (continuing rant offline)
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Replies

  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    stop caring so much what other people think!
  • kirili3
    kirili3 Posts: 244 Member
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    Tell them that you're just trying to be healthy and you're going about it your own way, maybe say it with a bit of a bite so they know to back off. Or just keep changing the subject until they get the hint.

    If all else fails, just tell them that we should all mind our bodies and, as long as we're healthy, no comments.

    The best thing is if you can make it funny. When my relatives ask me when I'm going to get married (where I'm from, people think it's better to have a proposal rather than marry for love) I laugh and tell them that nonsense is not for me and generally mock the issue until they back off.

    I don't know how to do that about weight without hurting people though!
  • corgicake
    corgicake Posts: 846 Member
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    If someone can't stop talking about poor them and you have what they want, all you have to do is come around warm and breathing for them to get their knickers in a bunch. Sad but true.
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
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    You are doing great. Do not engage. Give them only vague answers. Eventually, some of them will back off.
  • animatorswearbras
    animatorswearbras Posts: 1,001 Member
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    Since you aren't underweight the only thing I can assume is that it's code language for either "stop getting hotter" or "I am the sort of person that reflects on my own failure when someone else has success rather than being inspired by it"

    Either way it's not you it's them, they are projecting their insecurities on you and there's not alot you can do, apart from to say I'm not "skinny" I'm just getting healthier.

    Or since they are using the word "skinny" which sounds like a body shaming insult to me compared to saying slim or trim tell them to eff off. lol ;P
  • einzweidrei
    einzweidrei Posts: 381 Member
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    I hear the same thing all of the time. I think I've heard it from everyone. The last person I saw (that I hadn't seen in awhile) told me he hopes that I gain some weight back when I go on vacation.

    To be fair, I get it---because I have a medium-sized frame and I look kind of bony---I fall on the bottom end of the BMI chart now. But still. I'm not underweight and I like were I am.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
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    Oh people simply don't like change. I was told not too long ago "you look great now that you have lost a lot of weight, but I don't think you should be losing any more because you would look sickly" and I'm a 168 (5'6) and 103kg (227)! I laughed it off and moved on.
  • jec285
    jec285 Posts: 145 Member
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    Some people just don't know how to convey a compliment appropriately, there is no need to be upset.
  • MelissaPhippsFeagins
    MelissaPhippsFeagins Posts: 8,063 Member
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    I have a couple of co-workers like this. I finally said in front of both them: "I am not starving myself. I eat whatever I want, just less of it than I used to and since I"m not asking you to do it or exercise with me, it's really not your place to talk about it."
  • kmorgan221
    kmorgan221 Posts: 206 Member
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    I'd just tell them, "I'd rather not be fat, like you."

    Hey, if they think they can insult you, give it back to them.
  • __Di__
    __Di__ Posts: 1,630 Member
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    I just need to vent a little. I am soooooo DAMN tired of ppl telling me I need to stop working out because I am already skinny. I am 176 lbs and 6 feet tall. It took me so long to be OK with myself and my "skinny" size when my entire family was big. There was something always wrong with me because I can't gain or keep weight on. These people are sounding like I am a size 0. I went from a size 12 to almost an 8. I am loving the fact that I see abs coming out, I see my core and arms are stronger. My calf is not jiggly and my Butt... my butt is uplifted. WHAT does these ppl want from me!. I am doing this for me not for them......... Grrrrrrr! (continuing rant offline)

    Tell them you aren't actually working out to get thin, you work out to keep fit, therefore if you were to suddenly stop as per their "advice" you would end up unfit and that would contradict your own aims.

    Basically, you are telling them to mind their own bloody business, but in a way that should shut them up lol.

    They obviously haven't a clue otherwise they would not make such comments.
  • animatorswearbras
    animatorswearbras Posts: 1,001 Member
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    Some people just don't know how to convey a compliment appropriately, there is no need to be upset.

    To be fair "stop working out you're too skinny" isn't really a clumsy compliment, it's a guilt trip/accusation as much as "stop eating, you're too heavy" would be.

    "you look skinny" or "wow look at you twiggy" or "work those curves" are more clumsy compliments. She's got fair reason to be pee'd off and MFP forums is an appropriate place to vent. *shrugs*
  • ValGogo
    ValGogo Posts: 2,168 Member
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    People are dumb. You're really tall and you are 176. That's perfect. You're a size 8. THAT's perfect to me. You are thin, not skinny. Eff them all. And tell them to keep their opinions to themselves, even if they are close family.

    When I was a size 12 my mom would say stupid *kitten* like that. Latin moms; what are you gonna do. If you're not fat, you're not normal.

    Drives me bananas.
  • ValGogo
    ValGogo Posts: 2,168 Member
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    I have a couple of co-workers like this. I finally said in front of both them: "I am not starving myself. I eat whatever I want, just less of it than I used to and since I"m not asking you to do it or exercise with me, it's really not your place to talk about it."

    That's a good one!
  • jec285
    jec285 Posts: 145 Member
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    Some people just don't know how to convey a compliment appropriately, there is no need to be upset.

    To be fair "stop working out you're too skinny" isn't really a clumsy compliment, it's a guilt trip/accusation as much as "stop eating, you're too heavy" would be.

    "you look skinny" or "wow look at you twiggy" or "work those curves" are more clumsy compliments. She's got fair reason to be pee'd off and MFP forums is an appropriate place to vent. *shrugs*

    Maybe I just don't get why any formerly fat person would get upset over people calling them skinny. There are a lot worse things in life, being upset over someone thinking you're skinny is kind of silly.
  • meganjcallaghan
    meganjcallaghan Posts: 949 Member
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    I had someone go on for about 5 minutes yesterday about how I look ill and they are seriously concerned about my health. Pretty sure it was code talk for ''if you don't have cancer as an excuse you must be anorexic and you need help". I'm 5'6.5" and 145 pounds. puhleeeeeease.
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
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    Some people just don't know how to convey a compliment appropriately, there is no need to be upset.

    To be fair "stop working out you're too skinny" isn't really a clumsy compliment, it's a guilt trip/accusation as much as "stop eating, you're too heavy" would be.

    "you look skinny" or "wow look at you twiggy" or "work those curves" are more clumsy compliments. She's got fair reason to be pee'd off and MFP forums is an appropriate place to vent. *shrugs*

    That would depend on the delivery and the person. I've gotten this before and it was most certainly meant to be a compliment. To some people, being skinny can only be a positive thing and they don't understand why you would be offended. They also don't understand why anyone would work out if they didn't want to get skinnier. Exercising purely for fitness isn't really on their mental radar.
  • katiiee2708
    katiiee2708 Posts: 4
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    People dont understand what you see in the mirror, you look fine but you do need to stop listening to others. Just do a fake, sarcastic smile :laugh:
  • a_stronger_me13
    a_stronger_me13 Posts: 812 Member
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    Without knowing much about your eating and workouts, I'll just throw it out there that sometimes these comments are more directed towards habits than appearance. Drastic restrictive diets, comments you may make about what you're eating or what others are eating and excessive amounts of exercise can lead to some concern.

    But, if you're not doing any of that, sometimes other people achieving health and aesthetic goals makes others uncomfortable and they try to justify their own mediocrity. Try to brush it off as best as you can and if they are close friends and family, let them know that the comments they make are rude and make you feel uncomfortable.
  • JamesonEqualsLard
    JamesonEqualsLard Posts: 15
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    Since you aren't underweight the only thing I can assume is that it's code language for either "stop getting hotter" or "I am the sort of person that reflects on my own failure when someone else has success rather than being inspired by it"

    Either way it's not you it's them, they are projecting their insecurities on you and there's not alot you can do, apart from to say I'm not "skinny" I'm just getting healthier.

    Or since they are using the word "skinny" which sounds like a body shaming insult to me compared to saying slim or trim tell them to eff off. lol ;P

    Winning answer!

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