475 lbs and terrified

geminirooster2013

"The reason that you are a fat ugly slob is that you keep stuffing your fat ugly face with carbohydrates! Cut ALL Sugars and Starches out of your diet, and you will start to lose body fat, on a daily basis. Just drink water. No cheat days, not ever.

You made yourself what you are. So, clearly you don't give a **** about yourself. That's a perfect reason for no one else to give a **** about you either. If you don't want to make yourself better, then no one else can do it for you. " - Anonymous Craigslist poster in a health forum

I've been down this road more than once. I seem to always get started and then watch as things fall apart and as I fail to live up to my own expectations. I am thankful that my health isn't worse. Bloodwork wise, I am completely fine. Musculoskeletally however is a different story. I'm falling apart. My feet don't work the way they should. I have severely collapsed feet to the point where doctors have told me I have to lose the weight so they can go in and reconstruct my feet surgically.

I battle with depression as well. These are not excuses for why I am where I am, but a harsh reality of what I am up against: myself. It's time to win the war and lose the weight I need to lose.

So I guess I am here, 32 years old, 475 lbs, gay, and pretty much unhappy but optimistic, to ask for help, just like I was on that Craigslist forum. This is monumental. I cannot do this by myself. Losing 280 lbs is going to be a helacious roller coaster. I am terrified of failing and of doing poorly but I'm even more scared of becoming bed ridden.

So you can add me as a friend if you like.

And most of all, thanks. I appreciate it.

bridgie101

Sweet darling don't you worry. You'll be fine.

Firstly, I'd say don't get too worried about carbs, fats, proteins etc. Work out your daily intake. I used this site:

http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/#results

Just put your weight, age, etc in there, and see what it spits back at you.

Here comes the hard part: logging calories. it takes time, energy, thinking. When you are new you don't know how many calories something has. it takes ages looking them all up, adding them... but after a few weeks you start to get a body of things you always eat, so you don't have to go looking, they're in your favourites.

that's when life starts to get a bit easier.

As you log and as you weigh and as you lose it gets easier.

As to the depression: I'm going to be naughty now and tell you to get some buproprion from your doctor. It's a very slight upper, it's a great antidepressant (2nd line though, not the first they offer - but all the first ones they offer make you eat and sleep like a crazy person) and you can start to take a step away. It helps people with addictions, eg smoking addictions, and also might help you with the eating and depression you are suffering.

And just remember: you're like everybody else here. there are skinny people, and fat people, and middle sized people, and you certainly won't be the biggest person here. you're among friends. Look after yourself.

geminirooster2013

Thank you so much - you'll never know what your post means to me

bridgie101

Thank you so much - you'll never know what your post means to me

di nada.

:P

Just remember: it's like riding a bicycle. Which is to say, you're going to fall off and land on your bum more times than you can count.

Every day's a new day. Every messup becomes yesterday's messup. It's really hard to diet at start: what do I eat? Where do I buy that? What does it taste like? Will I like it? Will i feel full?

Baby steps, small changes. That scooby fitness will give you a reduction that's survivable, not some nightmare starvation from hell. And you don't want the awful nightmare diet. That attitude is a killer and dooms a person to failure.

You'll be okay so long as you don't take too much too seriously, and just keep on keeping on.

louisianagirl1612

First off let me say, good luck to you on your weight loss journey! There are always going to be self righteous idiots who lack compassion and hide anonymously behind internet forums and the like, in order to boost their egos by hurting others. Don't let those clowns rent space in your head. Weight loss is not easy, whether you have a few pounds to lose or many. My philosophy is to keep it simple and don't sweat the small stuff. If you give it your best, you will get results! This is a good site to log calorie intake and give you a starting point to make some changes. Its up to you to decide what changes will best help you to achieve your goals. Feel free to add me if you are looking for a support network

oxers

Okay, first of all, I want you to know that you're awesome. You're super awesome and worthy of love and respect exactly as you are, no matter what your body's up to or what victories you score or how many bad days you have. These are immutable properties. You're an awesome person no matter what decisions you make for your health. Trying is brave. Trying again is steely-eyed courage that no one can take from you, not ever.

Secondly, it's been said, but yeah, it's really not as scary as it looks. Since I really sat down and educated myself on my calorie needs and what tools are best to help me get there and help get me moving, I've made more progress than I ever have before. Once you have the knowledge and break it down into manageable chunks, which MFP definitely helps with, losing weight is actually pretty easy. It's just a matter of not flailing around blindly and being patient and gentle with yourself, you know? Read this - http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants It's incredibly helpful for beginners.

Third, I'm here for you. Add me as a buddy, hit me up any time, vent to me or ask me questions or anything you want. I'm a superb listener.

It's gonna be okay, babe. You don't have to do this alone.

psych101

You can do this

You might benefit from reading Ed's thread - he's lost more than 300lbs. It can be done http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1103164-3-yrs-312lbs-lost-1yr-from-bodylift-and-maintenance

Start today, start now.

Good luck :flowerforyou:

Yagisama

I would recommend keeping it simple.

1. Forget about carbs and sugars.
2. Focus on an appropriate caloric deficit (TDEE - 500 calories is a good starting point)
3. Log all calories each day
4. Do short and slow walking exercise, increase distance and pace over time
5. Don't read anything from Craigslist posters

kdeaux1959

One day at a time. Just one day at a time. Don't worry about the failures. We all fail more times than we would like to admit, but we get back up and go at it again. I started at 344 and am down to 228 as of this morning... I've weighed less (214 at one point) and regained some... But I'm in better shape than ever, overall... I'm stronger and have more endurance than I've had in years.

Most likely, weight loss will help your depression; especially when you start getting your exercise routine going.

This is how I started though... The first month or so, I got my eating under control... No real exercise. Then I started working out... both strength training and cardio... I increased that with more focus on cardio at first then made a shift to the strength training... All while maintaining a MODERATE calorie deficit.

You can do this. Sexual orientation has NOTHING to do with it (though I suppose you mentioned that to be up front toward those who would choose to support you -- I'm straight and married, but again, that has nothing to do with weight loss)... Best wishes... I wish you the best...

If you fall down, just get back up. As I said, we all fail ... Yet we only become a failure when we stop trying. Most of Edison's attempts at creating a light bulb were failures... But we don't remember any of those... We only remember the time he got it right...

Best wishes for every success.

TD18920

You and I can work through this process together if you like.. they say that going at it with a buddy is the best method of attack.. so I think it is the smartest course of action for me. I am 29, a mother of 1, currently going through a divorce, and for as long as I can remember have been on the "thicker side." I eat well the majority of the time, as far as the kind of foods I eat, but I know I also eat too much from time to time also. I am hour-glassed shaped, when I'm toned, right now i just look kind of pear shaped. I have always had large hips, thighs, and boobs. I am 5'6" and currently 226lbs. I can't remember being smaller than a size 8, and about 150lbs, but that was eons ago. I've found that I tend to loose motivation while working out over long periods of time, I also tend to get depressed, and start feeling down from time to time.. which doesn't help things. Also, things come up in my life, and I tend to loose interest in working out. I've tried switching it up from time to time, but still find i get bored and loose interest. Ive learned that i dont like to exercise when i feel like its a forced thing, or can be looked at as a chore. So my challenge is to find some fun altefnativez to do, and add into my exercise routines from time to time. Maybe if we can support each other we can get through the tough parts together.

AllOutof_Bubblegum

WOAH. There's so much going on up in this post I hardly know where to start.

The reason you keep failing so often is because you expect too much of yourself. An unnecessary amount of demands, actually. If your expectation are too high, you will always fail. Set them lower, make them actually attainable.

First off, carbs do not make you fat. Let me say it again so it sinks in: CARBS DO NOT MAKE YOU FAT. The ONLY thing that causes weight gain is consuming more calories than you burn. Whether you eat a deficit of lettuce calories, or Twinkie calories, it will make no difference in terms of fat lost.

Secondly, having NO CHEATS, EVER is the fastest one-way ticket to failure-town ever. The minute you tell yourself "I can't have X, Y, or Z", is the same minute your brain starts craving it like mad. So stop with the crazy restrictions, you're only hurting yourself in the long run with it.

Here are the steps you need to take:

1. Find the number of calories you need to maintain your weight. This can be done with the link that bridgie101 so kindly attached for you. Subtract 10-20% of that number, and this is your new calorie goal. Reassess this number with every 15-20 pounds you lose.

2. Start logging your food. Even if you go over you new goal, just keep logging every single bite, accurately, with a kitchen scale. This will get you more aware of what you are eating and more in tune with your body and what it needs.

3. Once comfortable with logging, consistently stay at that new goal. Eat whatever you want within those goals. Want Taco Bell? Have it. Plan ahead, choose something reasonable off the menu, eat it, log it, and lose weight. It really IS that simple. Not always easy, but definitely SIMPLE. Anyone can do it, MFP makes it easy.

4. Stick with it.

5. Stick with it.

6. don't give up.

7. Did I mention stick with it?

SLLRunner

You can do this

You might benefit from reading Ed's thread - he's lost more than 300lbs. It can be done http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1103164-3-yrs-312lbs-lost-1yr-from-bodylift-and-maintenance

Start today, start now.

Good luck :flowerforyou:

This.

Ed is awesome and a great inspiration.

2essie

Congratulations on taking the first step in your weight loss journey.

How rude can some people be. I couldn't believe what I was reading. I think most of us around here are nice people who want to help, but there will still be the idiots along the way.

I tried to find you a link to a man called Ed Davenport. He started on here at 560lbs. If anyone else can find it, he has a very uplifting story to tell. If not I found a blog he has done to inspire people buhttp://www.gettingfit4life.com/about-me/ It is worth a read and if he can do it, so can you.

I agree with getting your numbers from Scooby workshop. It is a great starting place and will give you the right amount of calories to start on to get you going. You will get plenty of treats along the way to keep you going too. It is not all doom and gloom. The friends you make will also make it a fun place to be. We have a laugh with this weight losing job too. If you want a mad old bird for a friend, just send me a request. I can be here for you but I will warn you, I twitter a lot about nothing much. However, I do like it all to be fun. Sorry, I am twittering again.

Anyway, I wish you great success with your weight loss and remember, it is as simple as calories in and calories out. Burn more than you eat and you will lose weight. That easy. Lol

svelt123

:flowerforyou: Welcome to your new life. You should be proud of yourself that you have fully and honestly acknowledged that you need help and have sought help. Your journey has truly begun. You can do this! Be patient. This will take time. It took time for you to gain the weight and it will take time to loose it. Never give up. Never quit. MFP is wonderful! You are amongst friends and a wealth of information to help you along this journey. You can do this! Take one moment, one day at a time. Welcome!!

lovespirit1111

I am brand new here and don't know anyone yet. I have suffered a tremendous amount of health problems, which has prevented me from being able to lose weight and body fat. I currently have about 60 lbs to lose. I was able to push myself and lose about 40 lbs several years ago, and have not made much progress since.

I would love to be your friend! I'm a great listener, and would be willing to give you support. My health issues are starting to improve, and I believe this is my year to turn things around. I believe it's YOUR year too! You're an amazing person, no matter what anyone says...don't ever forget that! I know you can do this!! Just don't put too many restrictions on yourself. If it feels too much like deprivation you won't stick with it. Baby steps!

Quasita

I'm popping on to give my two cents here...

I started at 485, 6'0.5", much in the same place you are talking about... After years and years of gaining despite desperately trying to fix the issue of my eating disordered past, I had pretty well given up on the idea that I would be anything other than humongous for the rest of my life.
I did not have the same foot issue, but I have collapsed discs in my spine... and my final, real wakeup call was when I went to the spinal surgeon's office after my MRI, and not only measured at a full 2" shorter than I was when I last had my height measured, but faced with the fact that surgical fixes to my spine would not be an option until I lost at least 200lbs.
When you're in pain, you feel hopeless. It keeps you from exercising because it hurts so much to move your body and do those things, and it's very easy to get depressed about it. I spent about 5 years of my life taking a lot of psych meds to combat my depression and anxiety, and it helped with pain, but in the end, I still gained... I will admit, though, that it did help me gain control over my compulsive eating issues.

So, coming from a person that started much from the same place, I will let you know some things I've learned.

1. The Scooby's calculator is a great tool for a lot of people, but not for people our size. To start, it will give you an okay guideline, but it's not designed for people substantially overweight. None of the calculators typically used by those websites are. Lots of people on MFP will tell you to use it, but from my experience, it incorrectly estimates the caloric needs/burns of a person over 100lbs overweight 100% of the time.
~After you get into a routine of counting calories and being active, I suggest getting a device that is designed to give you a more accurate personal burn estimation. I elected to get a BodyMedia Fit device. It showed me that my calorie burn estimates were off by over 500 calories, and when I started following the device's numbers instead of the Scooby calculator's estimate, I started losing at a much more successful rate.

2. In as little as 30 pounds, your feet will experience some relief. When I started, my shoe size was a size 14 women's. I recently purchased new shoes, and found that my feet are almost a full size smaller now, simply because of the pressure release from the arches allowing my feet to get closer to their more natural state.

3. Wellbutrin is an okay anti-depressant, but can be an iffy one if you have an eating disorder history (including compulsive eating disorders). Do some research and discuss with a physician. Seek out a psychologist that specializes in eating disorders... You don't have to have anorexia or bulimia. Overeating and compulsive eating disorders, emotional eating dependency, these are things that can be greatly helped by counseling, and most psychologists have psychiatrists that they work closely with, who can be actively involved in your care, and advise on psych meds if you need them. Even if you elect not to use medication, I strongly encourage you to get into therapy if you recognize depression as one of the difficulty factors in your relationship with food and weight control.

4. The depression WILL GET BETTER!!! As I write this, I have successfully been medication-free for 7 months, while remaining binge free as well!

5. I'm not going to lie to you... Losing as much as we have to lose IS a hard road, one that a lot of people on MFP have no frame of reference for... I have been here a while, and you're the first person to come close to my own situation that I have found, in pretty well every aspect. I've found tall people, I've found really heavy people, but you're the first person I've found that could say that for all reasons other than structural, you're perfectly healthy... like me. Weight loss has been the cause of many secondary health issues I've had to face, and it's not been easy at all, but I believe it's worth the fight... You will come to that as well.

6. Set reasonable goals for yourself. Lots of people will say you can lose more weight faster and do so safely, but the only person that should be advising on your loss rate should be your physician. My own has told me to stick to 2lbs/week, even with my ample need for loss. Faster losses have generated more secondary issues (mine are mostly reproductive issues due to hormonal changes from the loss) for many, so be kind to yourself. Get your numbers, be reasonable about your activity, and know that an improvement from last week is a success, even if the scale only moved .25lbs.

7. A person at 475lbs should not be eating 1200 calories. Your BMR is likely close to 3000 calories, and you need to accept that fact, even if it makes you feel weird. It is vitally important that you feed your body appropriately and healthfully. Cutting too much will make you stall almost immediately. When you start counting, you may even find that it feels like too much, because you've been trying so hard to cut your intake because that's what people have told you to keep doing... Just eat less, eat less, eat less... but the reality of it is, if you eat too little, it won't work. So seriously, be good and kind to yourself.

I've still got a long way to go, and you can feel free to add me if you like, as well as join my fitness support group, which is called Team RAWR (Righteous and Awesome WarrioRs). I can say, though, that I have lost in total about 70 pounds now, just making better choices and doing things right for MY body rather than what other people mistakenly suggest for my body. My feet are smaller, and I've regained about an inch of my height. It's taking me way longer than anyone predicted when I started, but there are so many things that have improved, and I've weathered so many storms, that I'm sure, in no uncertain terms, that you can too.

I'm just a mere 31 year old queer Nebraska chick sitting at just under 420lbs after 2 years of working, success and hurdles. I feel like I could have written your post myself...

Except I would not have gone to Craig's List, as that place is a beast!

Unknown

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SnuggleSmacks

Wow, that is quite a challenge. I can see why it might seem daunting. Congratulations on making that decision! It's probably the best gift you could ever give yourself.

Keeping it simple is best. I don't have much to lose, and I'm not counting carbs or sugar or anything. The more simple and easy you make things, the fewer opportunities you'll have to stumble.

I'll tell you a few tips that helped me tons:

If you can afford it, get a Bodymedia Fit Link. It goes around your upper arm and tracks steps plus temperature and moisture of your skin and tells you how many calories you burn in a day. It's a lot more accurate than Fitbit or Jawbone or Vivofit or any of the other trackers, and it will take so much guesswork out of calorie counting. You won't have to calculate anything. It syncs with MyFitnessPal so that you can see calories in and calories out all in one place, and it even calculates how much your deficit or surplus is.

Another way to get rid of guesswork is to get a food scale. Weigh everything you put in your mouth. Our concept of "portion size" is severely skewed, and a scale will be truly eye opening.

Use your scale to divide large packages of things into individual portions. For example, when I get nuts or chips, I weigh out portions and put them in baggies and write the calories on the outside of the bag. It keeps me from endlessly sticking my hand in a big package and eating three times what I should.

Treat yourself. I eat a lot of low-cal food like veggies and salad so that I can also eat the higher cal foods that I love. I eat a giant salad almost every day, but I also eat ice cream, pudding, chocolate, pizza, Taco Bell, and burgers. As long as it fits into your calorie budget, eat what you want. A university professor recently proved the calories in/out equation by eating nothing but Twinkies, Oreos and Doritos for while. He lost 27 pounds. As long as it fits in your calories, eat it. Depriving yourself of your favorite things just leads to binging and giving up.

Find ways to challenge yourself to move. I love games, so I do things like the Zombies, Run! app on my phone. It's a game where you run in real life while the app tells you a zombie story in your earbuds, and it tracks your run through GPS so it knows if you outran the zombies.

Start a Pinterest page. It's easy and free and you can pin all sorts of motivational photos, healthy recipes, clothes you want to wear one day, whatever. It's a great thing to look at when you're just not in the mood to take your walk or run or go to the gym.

Lift. Do cardio too, and I'm sure you'll need to take it slow and work your way up to it (maybe recumbent bike, with your bad feet?) but also lift. Keeping and strengthening the muscle you have does so much for your body.

Have fun! MFP is a great place to educate yourself, get suggestions and inspiration, and have fun while doing it...especially if you have a collection of animated gifs (another purpose for Pinterest)

Good luck! It's going to be a hard road, but success is addictive. I think once you take the first baby steps and see those numbers start to go down, you'll be hooked.

amwbox

Man, I hear that. I've been in a very similar boat as you. Still am, mostly, lol, with the exception of the physical problems.

Most important advice: Don't worry about what you eat. Worry about the amount. Get a scale, and be accurate. And go by calories. You can dip Doritos in ranch dressing and then deep fry them if you want...just as long as you keep the caloric intake below maintenance, you WILL lose weight.

Sounds like hyperbole, but that really is the reality of it. Calories. Eat a lot less of them.

ChristineS_51

You can do this

You might benefit from reading Ed's thread - he's lost more than 300lbs. It can be done http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1103164-3-yrs-312lbs-lost-1yr-from-bodylift-and-maintenance

Start today, start now.

Good luck :flowerforyou:

This.

I was going to say the same thing - Ed is my hero :flowerforyou: and his story so inspiring.

Good luck, one step at a time!

Ed is awesome and a great inspiration.

Gidzmo

First, everyone's got an opinion when it comes to weight gain/loss--and some insist on sharing theirs, even if you don't wish to hear it.. Only one that counts is yours.

Everyone's got to start someplace.

I suggest you start with small changes: swap out some chips for fruit, or take a walk up and down the block instead of doing nothing. What might help in your situation is walking IN water (get in a pool and walk in there). The water will give resistance, but your joints will not hurt near as much as on concrete).

countscalories

Hey! You'll be OK. Isn't it more terrifying to not care about helping yourself get healthier? I think you're pretty brave. And you're already on the right track by being here. Don't be afraid. It's time for you to shine! Like most people, you probably learned to speak one word at a time, and when you learned how to walk, you likely took only one step at a time. Perhaps looking at your goal this way would work for you. Instead of running a marathon, concentrate on moving forward a bit at a time, even if it's only a foot or two. For me, the thrill of each little "victory" is inspiration for me to keep going. I no longer look at how much I have to lose, I look at how far I've come. MFP is a great place for support; I've learned so much from fellow members. You will find what works for you. Get your head feeling happy, and your body will be grateful.

Oh, and remember to save Craigslist for when you're bored-- it's always good for a laugh! Most of the people who post in the forums are incredible idiots, which is why you can easily find livers and lungs for sale, but never any brains.

Sweetie_darling

Welcome and congrats on taking the first step,

Some brilliant advice above

Just want to say be kind to yourself, celebrate all your achievements and don't dwell on the bumps along the way. You deserve health and happiness

Best of luck

Xx

tiptoethruthetulips

What a wonderfully supportive thread...I have nothing to add but wanted to say welcome

CyberEd312

Bump to reply to when I am back to my laptop... OP nothing is impossible no matter how out of reach it may seem... Hang in there and I will be back to comment more soon...

geebusuk

"The reason that you are a fat ugly slob is that you keep stuffing your fat ugly face with carbohydrates! Cut ALL Sugars and Starches out of your diet, and you will start to lose body fat, on a daily basis. Just drink water. No cheat days, not ever.

......

I've been down this road more than once. I seem to always get started and then watch as things fall apart and as I fail to live up to my own expectations.

As others have suggested - I'd suggest focusing on calories. Forcing yourself to cut a big swathe of food, drinks and setting a goal that may not be realistic is quite likely to be 'setting up for failure'.
There's no need to avoid carbs for most people - just hitting a calorie goal regularly.
There's no need to just drink water - while I would generally avoid higher calorie drinks, there's plenety of flavoured drinks that are low in calories.
I have done BEST by not having 'cheat days' - though for me this still means often eating a fair bit in a deficit, but matching that to doing more exercise. However, I have also lost weight fine when I HAVE had cheat days. Or have every weekend eating maintenance or so (though that took longer).

CyberEd312

Baby steps, trying to do to much to quickly is an instant recipe for failure... You didn't get this way over night and you can't expect to get out of it quickly either... It is a life path you must be will to commit to and never consider it to be a diet or that there will ever be an end point. This is reality and it is the rest of your life so treat it as such. Anything that you do from this day forward, ask yourself is it something I can do long term. If you can't then it isn't worth doing... You don't have to drink just water, you don't have to cut out carbs, you don't have to make it harder than it needs to be... Break it down into the simplest of things that you can control, you wake up every morning and get out of bed so commit to today! Do everything that you can do to be as success for today as you can so that when you go to bed tonight you can rest easy cause you did just that. Refocus get a good nights sleep and commit to doing it again tomorrow... I was 560 pounds, unable to walk from room to room, had a computer rolling chair I would get around the house on to use the restroom and wheel myself from my recliner to the kitchen, was pretty much homebound from 2007-2009, and at the very end contemplated for 3 days committing suicide cause things just didn't look like it was worth living for... But on that third day, I made a choice, I was going to stop saying no and start saying yes. Anything that was asked of me I would do it, no matter how hard it was going to be, and I got to work..

You have to set a plan of action, whether that be a checklist of things you will accomplish (call it setting mini goals) and do this daily. Whether that be "I am going to drink 5 glasses of water, I am going to walk 50 ft. today, I am going to eat 3 main meals and 3 snacks, etc, etc.." and you get up that day and you start checking off those things on your list. Making sure that by the end of the day you have completed those tasks and then you write out the next days goals but this time you add to them. Instead of walking 50 ft. you will walk 60 ft. tomorrow... Baby steps but steps none the less, always striving to do better than you did the day before and never looking back, always moving forward.. Will you have bad days?? Most definitely but you take them in stride, as learning experiences and you chalk them up as such and refocus and get back to it.. You can have all the cheerleaders and supporter in the world backing you up, but until you are ready to commit to this lifestyle change 100% then you will fail. I know that is harsh but it is reality.

I can not stress the fact your head has to be in the game and you have alot of work ahead of you but each day that passes that you have been successful, they start to add up. Things start getting easier because you have laid a foundation that makes the path sturdy and easier to follow. But never think that there is ever an end game... You will be in this fight for the rest of your life so treat it as such. I lost the majority of my weight eating over 3000 calories a day and the larger majority of my macros came from carbs and I am a type 2 diabetic so don't think for a minute you can't be success eating carbs.. and don't label foods into groups of good vs. bad. Are there more nutritious foods than others? Most certainly are but that doesn't mean you can not have your cake and eat it too. The vast majority of my diet consist of Lean meats, a crap ton of veggies, and fruits and grains but it also include a bowl of ice cream every night, pizza on the weekends, and other things I may want to work into my meal plan that I want...

It is all about balance and once you learn that things will be alot easier.. I lost 312 lbs. over the course of 3 years and 3 months and am a month away from my 5 year anniversary. The time passes and adds up, it is hard to believe that 5 years have flown by but make no mistake I don't look at any of it in any other way than just living my life... That is it.. I still take each day as it comes, I still set mini goals to achieve each day and check them off as a complete them, I am still human and make mistakes have that occasional bad day but the good thing is tomorrow is a new day and I can start fresh... You just have to commit to the process and start walking the path...

Best of Luck to you on your Journey...

Ed

lacroyx

Baby steps, trying to do to much to quickly is an instant recipe for failure... You didn't get this way over night and you can't expect to get out of it quickly either... It is a life path you must be will to commit to and never consider it to be a diet or that there will ever be an end point. This is reality and it is the rest of your life so treat it as such. Anything that you do from this day forward, ask yourself is it something I can do long term. If you can't then it isn't worth doing... You don't have to drink just water, you don't have to cut out carbs, you don't have to make it harder than it needs to be... Break it down into the simplest of things that you can control, you wake up every morning and get out of bed so commit to today! Do everything that you can do to be as success for today as you can so that when you go to bed tonight you can rest easy cause you did just that. Refocus get a good nights sleep and commit to doing it again tomorrow... I was 560 pounds, unable to walk from room to room, had a computer rolling chair I would get around the house on to use the restroom and wheel myself from my recliner to the kitchen, was pretty much homebound from 2007-2009, and at the very end contemplated for 3 days committing suicide cause things just didn't look like it was worth living for... But on that third day, I made a choice, I was going to stop saying no and start saying yes. Anything that was asked of me I would do it, no matter how hard it was going to be, and I got to work..

You have to set a plan of action, whether that be a checklist of things you will accomplish (call it setting mini goals) and do this daily. Whether that be "I am going to drink 5 glasses of water, I am going to walk 50 ft. today, I am going to eat 3 main meals and 3 snacks, etc, etc.." and you get up that day and you start checking off those things on your list. Making sure that by the end of the day you have completed those tasks and then you write out the next days goals but this time you add to them. Instead of walking 50 ft. you will walk 60 ft. tomorrow... Baby steps but steps none the less, always striving to do better than you did the day before and never looking back, always moving forward.. Will you have bad days?? Most definitely but you take them in stride, as learning experiences and you chalk them up as such and refocus and get back to it.. You can have all the cheerleaders and supporter in the world backing you up, but until you are ready to commit to this lifestyle change 100% then you will fail. I know that is harsh but it is reality.

I can not stress the fact your head has to be in the game and you have alot of work ahead of you but each day that passes that you have been successful, they start to add up. Things start getting easier because you have laid a foundation that makes the path sturdy and easier to follow. But never think that there is ever an end game... You will be in this fight for the rest of your life so treat it as such. I lost the majority of my weight eating over 3000 calories a day and the larger majority of my macros came from carbs and I am a type 2 diabetic so don't think for a minute you can't be success eating carbs.. and don't label foods into groups of good vs. bad. Are there more nutritious foods than others? Most certainly are but that doesn't mean you can not have your cake and eat it too. The vast majority of my diet consist of Lean meats, a crap ton of veggies, and fruits and grains but it also include a bowl of ice cream every night, pizza on the weekends, and other things I may want to work into my meal plan that I want...

It is all about balance and once you learn that things will be alot easier.. I lost 312 lbs. over the course of 3 years and 3 months and am a month away from my 5 year anniversary. The time passes and adds up, it is hard to believe that 5 years have flown by but make no mistake I don't look at any of it in any other way than just living my life... That is it.. I still take each day as it comes, I still set mini goals to achieve each day and check them off as a complete them, I am still human and make mistakes have that occasional bad day but the good thing is tomorrow is a new day and I can start fresh... You just have to commit to the process and start walking the path...

Best of Luck to you on your Journey...

Ed

this, all this!

Mrsbeale11

"The reason that you are a fat ugly slob is that you keep stuffing your fat ugly face with carbohydrates! Cut ALL Sugars and Starches out of your diet, and you will start to lose body fat, on a daily basis. Just drink water. No cheat days, not ever.

You made yourself what you are. So, clearly you don't give a **** about yourself. That's a perfect reason for no one else to give a **** about you either. If you don't want to make yourself better, then no one else can do it for you. " - Anonymous Craigslist poster in a health forum

^^^No one will ever speak to you like that here.

Welcome and remember baby steps its not going to happen over night BUT it will happen if you don't give in. :flowerforyou:

xx

Cathalain

Not much to say other than welcome. Get ready for the ride... it'll be the best and the worst you've ever experienced. :flowerforyou:

It can be done. You have to believe that it can, and you have to believe in yourself. But I see a spark of hope in your post - grab on to that spark and turn it into a fire.

Read, read, and read some more. These people, on this site, have the best advice I have ever seen.

Again, welcome :drinker:

mtikky

I can only agree with the comments from everyone else in this thread.

I came back on here at the start of the year, set my height and weight as it was and set it to "lose 2lb a week".

It came back with 1690 calories.

With the support of friends I have added on here, and by adding everything I eat and drink - I no longer feel silly asking for a skinny latte - I know what I am putting into my calories for the day and it seems to help me to not go over the top.

33lb lost since January 1st - possibly more as that was based on a starting weight when I first registered, not my weight on that day which was more - and hopefully more to go.

Small steps will win. Don't lose hope and ignore the haters - if you want to do this, you can (with a little help from your friends).