The "I have stretchmarks, there's no point..." mentality.

Rachifloon

No, no, no, some people see stretch marks as disgusting ON THEMSELVES. How many times have you looked at someone else and thought "Man, they look disgusting?" Probably not very often, if ever.

I think you, and others that mentioned this, have hit the nail on the head here... I look at scars and such on other people, and think "what a cool, interesting pattern", or "THAT must have a story behind it", never that someone looks disgusting or less beautiful but fascination of the human body and slight curiosity (of course, I would never bound up to someone and outrightly ask "duuuude, what happened?!"). I never looked at myself in the positive way I do others who have similar markings. Simply because they're on me, and I don't know why. I think that may have something to do with what Barbie said, the media forbids marks and imperfections as a bad thing and sort of reinforces that "must cover up, can't photoshop real life" thinking in me. Sadly, the media's view on "beauty" has a very persuading effect on me and I hate it...

I am very glad I mad this topic. My attitude about this has always been internalised and released only as self loathing so knowing that the majority that I thought cared actually doesn't, and that it's a more natural thing than I thought, well, it's made me feel a ton better.

sun_fish

Most people see stretch marks as disgusting. Even if I do get slimmer and am a "socially acceptable" size, my scars will always be ugly and judged.

Nope. Not really. "Most" people see stretch marks as normal as "most" people have them in some form or another including a lot of non-mothers.

I completely agree with this, I have never heard anyone say they think stretch marks are disgusting. I know I certainly don't think they are ugly and or judge others that have them.

bajoyba

A good rule of thumb is to treat yourself the way you would treat someone you love.
Because you should be someone that you love.

Danicacub

We all have them, I have had many of mine since I was 12! Never been pregnant either, got them on thighs, arms, hips, stomach, calves, boobs, back. My friend always commented that she didn't have ANY, and of course she was curvy and gorgeous.. pretty insufferable.

If it offends someone that you have stretch marks then they don't have to look.. but honestly do you care what THOSE people think? shallow, stupid people? and I bet you that they have them too.

I have had a big issue with mine for the longest time, especially my inner thighs, I always feel self-conscious wearing shorts... but I still do, I would hate to look back on my life and feel I didn't live because of some marks. Like when I get wrinkles I will probably kick myself for worrying about stretch marks.

Also helps to find someone who doesn't care about stretch marks, If you are with a guy who makes you feel bad about them or comments on them.. not worth it. My husband doesn't care even though I know that whenever I do have a baby I will look like a zebra. :laugh:

Overall , no, It NEVER stops me from losing weight, Never ever give up. In all honesty, before, people would say "she has stretch marks because shes fat".. now, after nearly 50lbs loss, people say "she has stretch marks, how? shes not fat"..

Keep going :flowerforyou:

sugarlemonpie

Honestly, the stretchmarks have never really bothered me in regards to weight loss. I have a good amount I want to lose, but I figured once I lose it and tone up, they'd probably be less noticeable to me than they are now.

Just remember, this isn't only about weight loss. This is about health, too.

Yanicka1

News flash, even fitness competitors have them


image by yanickahachez, on Flickr

QueenBishOTUniverse

OP, I'm going to just parrot what everyone else is saying, I never even notice stretch marks on people so I'm quite certain I wouldn't notice them on you. You've worked hard so show it off. I saw on another thread someone mention the idea of wearing a bikini around the house for a while to get used to yourself in it and build confidence, maybe try something like this? The key to looking good really isn't so much about your body, but having confidence in yourself, and please believe me when I say that this is a lesson I'm still trying to knock in to my own head so I realize it takes time, but hey, practice practice practice.

I'm not so sure you can blame the modern world for these unrealistic images. A thousand year ago Chinese women had their feet bound to portray an unrealistic image of beauty. 100 years ago women were strapped into dresses made of whale bone until they could hardly breath to portray an unrealistic image of beauty.

Now to derail and nerd out for a moment. The structural support in corsets etc. may be referred to as boning, but it was not actually constructed from the bone material of whales which would be far to inflexible. Corset boning was actually made from the baleen of the whales which is similar in structure to hair and fingernails and gives structural support while allowing for a certain amount of movement and flexibility. Sorry, I teach aquatic science, can't help myself! :drinker:

DanaDark

I've seen skinny people that have been skinny all their lives have them.

I am a 5'4" male, my largest weights was 141 pounds, and I have some (inner thigh).

So, pretty much anyone can get them.

While not perfect, they are far from horrifying. In most cases, they look just fine on people.

thingofstuff

Also Bio Oil and other knock off super skin healing oils or Polysporin do wonders on scars and stretch marks. I had a really unfortunate 4 inch scar starting from the middle of my bum cheek to down my thigh (from an awkward to explain accident) and it is almost unnoticeable now from regular exfoliating and keeping moisturized. I have stretch marks on my inner thighs and outer hips and they are are almost invisible after applying moisturizer.

All in all what everyone before me has said is true, the people that should matter will not care about stretch marks. Don't blame your body dissatisfaction on the marks, take control of the things you can do every day like exfoliating, applying healing oils before bed, and hydrating your skin every morning and, of course, focus on getting into the shape you want to be in. Then if you are still unhappy with the stretch marks take more expensive/drastic action.

Trust me, I am young, have always been physically active, just shy of 5 foot 8 inches, have never been more than 160 pounds at my heaviest in the middle of puberty and I still have stretch marks. I am a model for an international agency and no one screams in horror at the stretch marks on my thighs when we run around in our underwear at fittings.

MissFlab2Fab2014

This was and still is a issue I fight with everyday! Before having my son I had awesome skin, like beautiful sun kissed gorgeous skin. I had him and BAM stretch marks on my stomach, near my belly button, hips, thighs, butt, breasts even in my arm pits, oh best one that I hate!!! back of my knees....:grumble: but as I lost a little weight, and with time (and I swear by bio-oil) which I dont use anymore cause its like 14$ every time... but, with a little tanning too. I don't notice them as much. Like either I am use to it or it just isn't as noticable. You just have to accept them, embrace them, and TAN them

Arranna1212

Stretch marks aren't disgusting. Pretty sure most people don't go "oh man, look at that person they have stretch marks, gross!" Especially people who have the "left over stretch marks" and they're fit. Just means you seen you had a problem and FIXED IT. Don't worry about it.

TheVirgoddess

I think I just need to learn to up my self-esteem and get out of my own head. People DO notice their own flaws more than others... I think I just wanted to vent a little about the matter and get some advice. And advice I got so thanks to everyone who chipped a word in., I appreciate and am taking it all on board. c:

Yes, you do. You're stunning in your photo. I've honestly *never* looked at another person and thought "oh my gosh, look at her stretch marks!". I have them too - boobs, thighs, belly. It's just part of who I am, like my freckles.

DopeItUp

Make up an awesome backstory. "These are the scars I got rescuing a herd of kittens from the fire at the orphanage"

Accept them and move on. Everyone has scars, stretch marks, various imperfections that they don't like. You can either accept it or wallow in self-pity. The choice is yours and yours alone.