Is it normal for PTs to insult you?

Transatlantic20145
Transatlantic20145 Posts: 94
in Motivation and Support
I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.
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Replies

  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    Those PT's are lazy and have two or three questions for everyone. Or maybe that is the goal of most people. Whatever the reason, it is not about you.
  • CA_Underdog
    CA_Underdog Posts: 733 Member
    Nah. The norm for a good personal trainer is to listen to their customer, even if they don't always agree.
  • Transatlantic20145
    Transatlantic20145 Posts: 94
    hmm, just tired of the passive aggressive comments from PTs, at another gym the PT kept trying to make me sign up for PT, saying I would look much better in my clothes if I lost weight. Geez!
  • Pinkranger626
    Pinkranger626 Posts: 460 Member
    As a PT and former overweight person I see both sides of the coin. As for the PT's comment, that was probably more or less something that was not intended to be an insult, but was simply not tactfully said.

    As for your reason to get fit, you have to understand. The most generic and common "reason" for people to want to start exercising is to "get fit" or "get healthy" or "feel better" or "lose the baby weight" etc. As a PT I find these reasons are great reasons for wantng to get into shape, I mean who doesn't want to feel good about their body etc? However, most of the time using that as your reason not only isn't specific enough to complete a goal setting process, but it also is so generic that it doesn't give the client enough purpose. If the client doesn't have a specific purpose, then when it gets tough (and there is always at least one time where it gets tough) then it's that much easier for them to quit.

    For example, if your goal was to lose weight to be healthy, how do you know when you're healthy? Do you only workout until you reach that goal? Or do you want something to change like getting off high blood pressure meds, or getting your cholesterol levels down, or reaching a certain body fat percentage? These are all things that are measurable and will help you figure out your progress. Or maybe you choose a goal of being able to run a mile without stopping, or being able to do pushups on your toes, or pullups or something like that.

    I'm not trying to attack you, and I definitely think the PT was rude, even if it was unintentional. But I'm hoping that maybe this will also help you to think about what your goal is. I find when i have a specific goal in mind it's so much easier to push through and figure out what i need to do to get there.

    Transatlantic, yes there are definitely PTs that are passive aggressive and have their own opinions on overweight people etc. I'm not one of them, and there are plenty out there who are in the same boat as I am. Many PTs in commerical gyms are given sales goals and are disciplined when they don't reach them... some are even terminated. So a lot of PTs end up having to be pushy to try and reach their goals, this is another aspect of the field that I'm not super thrilled with and part of the reason that i left commerical fitness.
  • Transatlantic20145
    Transatlantic20145 Posts: 94
    Workout girl, thanks so much for taking the time to write that thorough response. Yes I understand now, you're right, a PT needs to know more specific goals so they can motivate you.

    I guess for me....it's really embarrassing for me to admit - even to fitness professionals - that I need to lose weight - and honestly I don't have that much to lose - I'm 18 pounds higher than the least healthy weight of my BMI. In fact a lot of people would even argue that I could be fine how I am. But I just feel really embarrassed to admit to people, yeah I need to lose weight. I know they'll think I do or do not regardless, but somehow it makes me very uncomfortable, maybe I'm kind of living in denial or something, I don't really want people to think I'm overweight. When people in general tell me I have a thick waist/stomach I laugh and say, Oh really? haha. Well I think I'm fine for now, I don't admit to them that I think about weight loss a lot.

    Thanks again for your explanation, that makes me feel better :)
  • Pinkranger626
    Pinkranger626 Posts: 460 Member
    You know, I get a lot of comments from people saying that i don't need to lose weight and that I'm fit enough etc etc. What really matters is how YOU feel about yourself. Society has such a twisted sense of heathy and such anyway.

    As long as you're not doing things that are unsafe or unhealthy to lose weight then don't worry about what other people have to say about it. And personally, *most* people (I use that lightly as there are always exceptions) could use with some more activity in their lives.
  • ken_m
    ken_m Posts: 128
    If you respond with "do you even lift" you'll have earned his respect and he won't sass you again
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    I don't think he is necessarily telling you that you HAVE to lose weight. I think he's just cutting past the bullsh*t. Most people hire a trainer to look better, not for "general health." He wasn't knocking you down, he was stating the obvious motivation.

    Between this and your other thread, you have a lot of body image issues. It seems you take a lot of comments as insults, even when they aren't. You may want to re-evaluate why that is.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    I don't get how that's insulting? You're saying you're not at all bothered by your appearance?
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    I don't think he is necessarily telling you that you HAVE to lose weight. I think he's just cutting past the bullsh*t. Most people hire a trainer to look better, not for "general health." He wasn't knocking you down, he was stating the obvious motivation.

    Between this and your other thread, you have a lot of body image issues. It seems you take a lot of comments as insults, even when they aren't. You may want to re-evaluate why that is.

    this sounds about right.

    I don't see how it's insulting- I'd say easily the bulk of people chose to start working out because they want to look better and feel better about themselves.

    As a former PT- I can't tell you how many people walked in and said they want to lose weight here and look better for summer.
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  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    So what you are saying is that you are trolling?
  • HerkMeOff
    HerkMeOff Posts: 1,002 Member
    What was the insult?
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    You call that an insult? Really? get thicker skin.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    So what you are saying is that you are trolling?

    Agreed. Also, idk how this even qualifies as an insult.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    I think they are all supposed to say that? Depending on the gym. Like on a phone call with your bank they say the same things over and over maybe cookie cutter gyms have to say certain things.

    I went and told the guy I need strenght and core stability due to my back problems. When he said "what about looking better?...is that a goal?" I almost said--- "DUDE, have you SEEN ME?" just kidding, i'm not all beautiful and fit, but i'm no dog either and so they don't mean it like that.

    it's just like at the drive through no matter what you order they always have to throw that last "want fries or coke" in there. or at the mall they want your number and email or you to sing up for a credit card to save a whopping 5%. dont' take it personal. I don't.
  • HerkMeOff
    HerkMeOff Posts: 1,002 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    You call that an insult? Really? get thicker skin.

    Is that a UFC shirt you're wearing? Really? You're not even that tough.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    You call that an insult? Really? get thicker skin.

    Is that a UFC shirt you're wearing? Really? You're not even that tough.

    Stop flirting! :laugh:
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
    Does he poke you in the stomach and make you giggle?
  • Transatlantic20145
    Transatlantic20145 Posts: 94
    My chocolate diet - that makes a lot of sense! Yes, that's what I was wondering when I started this thread. Like do they tell everyone they need to lose weight. Glad it's nothing personal - whew!
  • nilbogger
    nilbogger Posts: 870 Member
    So... do you not want to look better?
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    My chocolate diet - that makes a lot of sense! Yes, that's what I was wondering when I started this thread. Like do they tell everyone they need to lose weight. Glad it's nothing personal - whew!

    Your welcome.:flowerforyou:
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member
    People don't stick with workout programs because they want to "get healthy." They stick with them because they want to look better. He's just trying to get you to identify a reason that will keep you coming back to the gym.
  • levitateme
    levitateme Posts: 999 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    If you're admittedly 15 lbs overweight, why do you want your PT to coddle you?
  • Transatlantic20145
    Transatlantic20145 Posts: 94
    People don't stick with workout programs because they want to "get healthy." They stick with them because they want to look better. He's just trying to get you to identify a reason that will keep you coming back to the gym.

    You're right...it's just very embarrassing to have it said out loud by people. Glad to know that it's a standard thing they say....felt so humiliated when I felt that he was implying that I personally need to change my appearance.
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    If you're admittedly 15 lbs overweight, why do you want your PT to coddle you?

    Probably closer to 30 if we're being honest. People always underestimate the amount they want to/should lose.
  • Jacwhite22
    Jacwhite22 Posts: 7,010 Member
    People don't stick with workout programs because they want to "get healthy." They stick with them because they want to look better. He's just trying to get you to identify a reason that will keep you coming back to the gym.

    You're right...it's just very embarrassing to have it said out loud by people. Glad to know that it's a standard thing they say....felt so humiliated when I felt that he was implying that I personally need to change my appearance.

    You need to be happy with yourself. Nobody can make you feel badly about yourself except you. Decide what your goals are and then attain them. If you think the trainer can help then use him.....If you don't then don't.
  • Transatlantic20145
    Transatlantic20145 Posts: 94
    I have around 15 pounds to lose and I was mortified when the PT at my gym asked me my goals, when I said it's just general health, he asked me, it's because you want to look better right? I know I may not be the best looking person out there but it's so embarrassing when people tell me I need to lose weight. This has happened before at other gyms.

    If you're admittedly 15 lbs overweight, why do you want your PT to coddle you?

    Probably closer to 30 if we're being honest. People always underestimate the amount they want to/should lose.

    I'm 18 pounds more than the lowest healthy weight in my BMI range for my height. With that said I do have a huge battle of the bulge/waist area so I'm hoping that by exercising, I can improve this problem :)

    BTW, sound advice! I should focus on RESULTS, not what PTs think. They won't be in my life forever!
  • _lyndseybrooke_
    _lyndseybrooke_ Posts: 2,561 Member
    I thought one of all of our goals is to look better. You DO want to look better, don't you? I sure do.

    I understand that it may have embarrassed you, but I wouldn't consider that an insult.

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