Getting past the embarrassment barrier of exercise?

VauseVittel

How do you or did you get over the first hurdle so to speak of taking up exercise, starting it again or starting a new exercise regime.

I have chickened out of going swimming so many times as Im absolutely petrified of being that naked in public, Ive never been a great swimmer however its less stress on my joints while I try to get down a few sizes before attempting running or jogging.

Also the thought of being in the gym really scares me in case I feel like im being judged.


How do you get past the embarrassed feeling or do you just have to get over it?

The_Godwin_72

wow- that is bad feelings to have. First - love yourself because you are worth it. the gym thing- it's like life really, people are going to judge. You can't stop that but you shouldn't let SMALL minded people stop you from anything you want to do. Maybe start with walking in park or around track somewhere until you are ready for something else.

BoxerBrawler

If you feel like you are being judged or that people are looking at you... just remind yourself that this is about YOU and your health and fitness and not about them. At the end of the day you are the judge of you and what anyone else thinks is of no consequence. Will these people be there when you're reaching your goals? probably not. Will these people be there for you if you fail? Certainly not. Who gives a crap what anyone else thinks.

kimdawnhayden

Trust me everyone else is so worried about what everyone else thinks of them they are not worrying about you. Just do your thing and before you know it you'll be where you want to be in your fitness journey. Why do you think gyms have all those mirrors? So people can stare at themselves. Lol.

hanni23

Tbh I feel exactly the same about the gym thing...so I did a bit of shopping around before I chose which gym to join. The one I go to has a complete mix of shapes and sizes and a friendly atmosphere. It's always a bit intimidating at the start but once you've been a couple of times and get used to how things work there you'll start to relax. I actually find it quite amusing now when the gym bunnys come in because a lot them don't really do much when they're there.

You could also look at different styles of classes, I've started going to beginners ballet which whilst it isn't much cardio there is a lot of flex and stretch so you really hurt the following day....and thankfully its a class where no lycra is required

janatarnhem

Great bra - thank you to the MFP'er who introduced me to enell bras. Found a very small, quieter gym with a pool - much less people around, sometimes by 100%, and the realisation that I have to do this to move forward!

DawnieB1977

I'm just back at the gym after having my third baby -she's 8 weeks old. I feel massive and a bit embarrassed about gaining weight, especially as I was going to that gym until 38 weeks pregnant! I've been going there for years so they've seen me pregnant, after pregnancy, and losing loads of weight and starting all over again!

I did spinning the other day and felt huge compared to the other people there, and compared to how I used to look when I did spin before.

I keep going because I have my goal in mind and a wardrobe full of clothes that don't fit. Plus I like exercise.

I'm starting PT sessions next week and I'm worried how unfit I'll feel, but I know I'll get there again.

I'm fairly sure no-one is judging me, and if they are, so what? I'm doing what I want to do.

Yanicka1

Other people think less about you than you think.

I say fake confidence until you feel it. Go there, act as if you belong and in no time, you will

kk_140

I haven't been a member of a gym in years, but I remember always feeling out of place when I was a member. I treat it the same way I treat everything that makes me uncomfortable. I walk in like I own the place. I normally walk in and step on the first machine that look simple and easy and has a good view of other equipment. Then I carefully (but very nonchalantly and cooly) watch other people on other machines until I'm certain that I know how to do it. Then I strut the that machine and do that for a while while watching other people again. After a bit I knew how everything worked lol.

Just own it. It works for everywhere.

benjib84

Just remind yourself that most of the people there, used to be where you are now...

Dogwalkingirl

Do you have a friend that might be willing to do something with you? You could do it together. Believe me others go through this and for many it is their first time to a gym or class or pool etc etc.

Maybe search around for a "beginners' class of some sort. Then you will all be in the same boat and you will not be the only one nervous.

Also if you are nervous of being naked of people when going to the pool wear your suit to the pool under your clothes and after change in the bathroom if your pool does not have individual change rooms. My pool has an area where a curtain can be closed for privacy and many have that so maybe try another pool.

ShellF415

I completely understand this feeling because I used to be there. What I found was that everyone there is focused on doing their own thing and once you have been there a few times you get see the same people and most everyone is friendly. Keep in mind that everyone was a beginner once and felt the way you do now.

awomaninsane

On my first few trips to the gym and spin class i averted my eyes and made no eye contact at all with anyone in case i saw them watching me or pointing/giggling etc.
After a week when i braved looking up and at people i realised that no-one and i mean no-one was looking at or watching me and i was sooooo relieved. Why would they anyway, they were all concentrating on their own thing.

Just get out there and get it done, you'll be great!

Oscarinmiami

don't worry about other people...this is for you...its hard but you need to get over it and get your butt to the gym screw what people think or say...Just do it!

laylawaffles

Honestly, I think only shallow people that you wouldn't want in your life would judge you. I had the same fears when starting out, but then someone close to me asked, when I see someone who needs to lose weight at the gym, or out jogging, or in the pool, what do I think. My response was "fair play to them".

You'll get a lot more people admiring the fact that you're doing something about it. Keep going, don't get demotivated based on appearance. Just put your chin up and remind yourself why you're doing it.

paulperryman

understandable but unless you make a display of yourself by trying to be incospicuous noone really gives a toss, they are doing there own thing, people may look and there's likely weird people in any gym, but just concentrate on wha you are doing and ignore them

as others said you have to start somewhere before you can overcome any hinderances, i was always really shy and hated approaching people and still do to some extent and felt like a right tosser when i was starting out at the gym looking so obese and jiggling about, but at some point you just have to do it or nothing will ever change.

A partner at the gym is a big bonus. and you will be suprised that if you keep persisiting, people will notice and possibly approach you with positives, i recieved that from people i was seeing most days at the gym and i never approached them, they made the first step

HollyKarlsen

I just exercised at home mostly, doing walks in the woods or exercise dvd's in my living room. I have to admit when I started I was embarrassed even for my husband to see me in my workout clothes but I knew the only way I'd get to where I'd look better for him was to just do it anyway. Now that I've gotten to my goal weight, it doesn't bother me.

pandabear_

I think it's more of a mental thing about getting over your anxiety and worrying about what others will think of you. People experience it whatever shape/size they are.

I was so scared to start running in public at first when I was at 130 lbs. I was just so worried that people would stare at me or laugh at me or I would fall over or something like that.

I started to write out tables when I was really anxious to change the way I was thinking. So there were three columns. Your anxious thought about what will happen, what is realistically going to happen, positive solution.

So in column one I would write: "I will fall over and people will laugh", in column 2: "I don't usually fall over when I run", in column 3: "If I fall over, I will just get back up."

In time you can stop writing out tables, and just conquer whatever exaggerated anxious thought you have with a realistic thought.

LSinVA

I felt the same way when I first started going.

I go to a local gym where there's lots of people of all sizes and ages. I take classes with a lot of women who are mothers like myself who have gained a bit of weight over the years, or trying to keep it off.

Trust me, no one cares. They're all there trying to do the same thing you are in one way or another. Even if they did care, no one has ever said anything. I'm there trying to do something about my weight. I've found most people to be more supportive than anything.

Brownsbacker4evr

It helps if you go into a gym knowing what you're gonna do. You don't wanna run around a gym or stand around looking clueless. You plan out a routine ahead of time, don't try nothing complicated or flashy. Keep it simple, but effective until you learn more advanced exercises. You will only bring attention to yourself if you're doing something with some bad or wrong form. Which is why you work on these things in your free time and get a feel for the form the best you can. If someone isn't busy with their own sets, you can ask for a form check or a spot. Most people will gladly help you out.

Wish you the best of luck! Go get it!

msf74

You're over thinking.

Just do it.

lovekohl

You're over thinking.

Just do it.

+1

People are too involved in their own workouts to be worried about yours, and if they have enough time to be judging you for trying to better yourself, then they're the ones with the problem.

Working with a trainer has always helped me get over those fears. That way you know you're doing the right exercises the right way.

drangonfly2323

Okay this was me. I would go to classes only with friends and I would hide in the back and I would only run early in the morning when it was dark. Your confidence in what you are doing and the changes in yourself will come, just keep taking baby steps and getting out and doing as much as you can. I suffer with extreme anxiety and for a long time I would let that hold me back. However now I will run in the middle of the day, go to any class I want and I just dont care anymore. It took a lot to accept that the only person who was ever judging or critiquing me was me.

Meerataila

I'll non-judgmentally share a pool with anybody who doesn't pee in it or cannonball down on top of me. And any other decent human will, too. Those other people shouldn't even be a factor in your life. They're less than the beach sand under your flip flops.

Annesoucy1957

I am very self conscious about my body and that is fat or thin, but I dont pay attention to other people looks and put in my head that they are wired like me. What I do notice is the effort people put in their exercises no matter what size they are I always have admiration for their commitment

iRun_Butterfly

The only way to get over it is to just go do it, and do it again, and again, and again. Walking through those doors will become easier every single time, I promise you. Two years ago I was petrified to walk into my gym and even use the treadmill, I felt like everyone was looking at the pathetic fat girl who could barely walk at 3 mph without getting red faced and winded. But the more I did it, the more confidence I gained. Now, not only do I walk through those doors, I hop on that treadmill and run with all of the confidence I can muster! Six months ago I shook like a leaf when I decided to venture into "no womans land", the weight room, and I continued to shake like that leaf for the first two or three months. Now, I walk back there like I own the place, load up my weights and do my work. People are going to look, people are going to watch. But honestly, are you going to let that keep you from attaining your goals? I sure hope not!!

ajff

I remember a similar post a few weeks ago... The OP said something about summoning all her strength to do a class at her gym. The respondent said something about seeing people who have weight to lose in her class: They work harder, they look uncomfortable, and she respects the sh** out of them! That THEY are motivating to her because if they are there, working so hard, she can be there.

So... when you get there, hold that head up high! You never know who you are inspiring!

BringingSherriBack

You just have to get past the mental block that is holding you back. I did water aerobics at my heaviest (325 pounds) and loved it. Yes I was one of the biggest people there for the class and yes once I got over myself and my over thinking, I really enjoyed the class and started doing it 3 times a week. I didn't lose massive amounts of weight but I felt better physically and had way better self esteem since I knew I was working on a healthier me.
I also was forced to do physical therapy for my knees at the same time and my therapist wouldn't let me do water therapy. She insisted I do the elliptical, treadmill and weight machines. I built muscles that helped with the pain and I actually amazed myself at how strong I really was. The hour long therapy sessions 3 times a week kicked my butt, but I felt good about myself when it was over.

You can do this. You just have to quit caring about what other people think and just do it! Honestly most aren't thinking what you think they are thinking. Most are really thinking "good for her trying to do something about her health" not the "OMG look at her" that we all think they are thinking.

Good luck and enjoy the journey!

dancingj2

For me doing things that I do not need to go to a gym has helped. I have several DVD that I uses at home, I like to walk and to bike and I sometimes will skip rope inside my garage.

amethyst7986

If you can afford it get a trainer at the gym, this way you can learn to use the equipment and get a general layout of the gym, I learned where all the equipment was (Bozu balls, yoga mats, free weights, etc) it helped me to be able to set up my own circuits once I quit using the trainer. This helped me a lot when I started working out again, although I don't use them any more I still see them at the gym and they will often ask if I need help learning some new techniques or changing up my routine.

or find a workout buddy, this way you can at least have someone to chat with or help motivate yourself.

and if neither of these are an option for you then just go for it. For me its my alone time, I don't worry about others anymore-- I go in do my workout and leave. I rarely speak a word to another person there unless its the initial "hello" or "good bye"

likitisplit

I have been the gym rat. I've seen people come into the gym and just wanted to cheer them on knowing what it took for them to get in there and knowing that anything I said would just make them feel uncomfortable.

Fast forward through two pregnancies - I'm 215 pounds, heavier than I've ever been in my life. I can't WALK a 5k let alone run one - I've NEVER been able to run. But I'm down to the bottom of the barrel, need to make a change, and have an app. Just go slow and see how far you can get.

My self talk as I was lacing up my shoes that first time:
"They are going to laugh to see me out there. They know I'm just going to quit."
"Don't worry about "them." They are in their houses and you will be exercising. Deal with quitting when you get there. All you have to do is get outside."
"I'm going to look like hell with my fat sloshing from side to side."
"Just get out there and do what you can."
"I"m never going to be a runner."
"And the alternative is to just get fatter? You have to do something."

So I went out there and jiggled and rippled and felt like all the empty houses were staring at me. I ran my first 30 seconds and felt like I could do that again. I felt SO proud. As a matter of fact, every time I run past that point now, I still get that feeling of pride and self-respect. But that's getting ahead of myself.

I got out there three days a week. Working around my responsibilities and schedule. Just doing what I could and not worrying about my eventual point of failure. Because I was going to fail. Did I mention that I was physiologically incapable of being a runner. I have asthma, for God's sake.

One day, one of my neighbors said something. She said, "YOU GO GIRL!!!!"

All of the negativity? All of the judgement? It was coming from inside. Everybody who saw me was inspired at seeing me do something they weren't. All of the runners knew EXACTLY how hard it was for me to be out there and respected me even more than the rest.

And another lady in my neighborhood started to run because of me.

You just need to do it. There is literally nothing to fear but the fear itself. You confront that and it will blow away like a mist. And you'll be left with the self-respect of doing something good for yourself.

And me? The "non-runner"? I ran a half-marathon a year after starting Couch to 5k. I've lost 50 pounds. I'm doing pretty well.