Can you relate to this?

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Replies

  • crystalbluewolf13
    crystalbluewolf13 Posts: 197 Member
    I hated getting called names like this, really crushes your soul
  • 1959sunshine
    1959sunshine Posts: 29 Member
    Thank goodness I have never had that done, a few coments to someone else about me, but never to me. People are so unbelievably rude and inconsiderate. Someday, somehow those comments will come back to bite them in the butt, believe me. Dont let people with no morals get to you.
  • teranga79
    teranga79 Posts: 202 Member
    It's the same at the other end of the spectrum too. When my sister was underweight complete strangers seemed to think it was ok to make comments about it, or tell her to eat a cheeseburger, etc.

    There's a lot of ignorant people out there!
  • thekat78
    thekat78 Posts: 70 Member
    It is the fact that they are extremes. Extremely fit, extremely skinny, extremely overweight, extremely tall, etc. It seems to be human nature to be uncomfortable with the extremes of life. The only way to cope with that is to comment on it, say mean things, be mentally abusive to justify the fact that in reality, THEY are the ones with the problem. Not the person they are commenting on.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    I think everyone who is overweight, technically don't have to be overweight, can relate the people saying s*** like this. I started getting man boobs in middle school and it definitely gets in my way.
  • TeachTheGirl
    TeachTheGirl Posts: 2,091 Member
    It's very sad how much this can affect you negatively, even when you lose the weight.

    I had comments like that regularly while living back in England, even from my own family. I still look in the mirror and see a fat girl. It upsets my husband more than it upsets me, because it's like the worst thing we can be is fat? That's not right...
  • Veggie_mama
    Veggie_mama Posts: 77 Member
    Every day of my life. I can relate to the cartoon very well. It would cause me major distress until I built a wall and would beat them to the punch with self-deprecation. They'd call me "fat", "Fatty", "Piggy", etc and I would easily come up with a dozen other names worse than what they could come up with. In essence, is that the best they could come up with when I can do better. Usually, it would shut them up.
    I lost weight a few years ago and regained due to pregnancies and the bad habit of emotional eating. I'm trying to lose the weight, but I still have my significant other (at times insignificant when he's like this), making comments about how hot I used to be. How skinny I used to be. That hurts more than anything a stranger would say to me. But, the wall is still fully intact.
    People who feel the need to make fun of others are missing something within themselves. To spread the hate like that is inexcusable. We are ALL beautiful souls, beautiful human beings.
    God Speed to those like me trying to make a change for themselves. If you're comfortable with yourself, then be amazing. Much love and peace to you all. Namaste.
  • LiftAllThePizzas
    LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
    Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?

    This is kind of what I was thinking too. Even when I was 150 lb overweight, I never got anything like this.

    I recall maybe 5-6 comments being made about my weight in middle school & junior high, and 2 times that rude things were said about it behind my back and I found out.

    I am grateful that I can't relate to this.
  • Veil5577
    Veil5577 Posts: 868 Member
    Yes, I have had this happen a time or two, but I have the gift of being able to out-insult anyone. Usually I respond to this kind of thing with silence and a very evil smile. You should see them twitch!
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?

    This is kind of what I was thinking too. Even when I was 150 lb overweight, I never got anything like this.

    I recall maybe 5-6 comments being made about my weight in middle school & junior high, and 2 times that rude things were said about it behind my back and I found out.

    I am grateful that I can't relate to this.

    Lucky for you on not being bullied. It happens everywhere BTW. I remember telling my dad in middle school and his words of wisdom were stand up this them. If you get suspended we both will explain to mom why.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?

    This is kind of what I was thinking too. Even when I was 150 lb overweight, I never got anything like this.

    I recall maybe 5-6 comments being made about my weight in middle school & junior high, and 2 times that rude things were said about it behind my back and I found out.

    I am grateful that I can't relate to this.

    Lucky for you on not being bullied. It happens everywhere BTW. I remember telling my dad in middle school and his words of wisdom were stand up this them. If you get suspended we both will explain to mom why.

    How long have you been in middle school? Maybe you should transfer to a different district?
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    It sounds like the person who made that comic needs pretty intensive therapy.
  • SallyPDXer
    SallyPDXer Posts: 18 Member
    I have been "fat" all my life and was bullied as a child for it. However, this cartoon definitely does not represent my experience as an adult. Or maybe I have just learned how to block it out really well?
  • LiftAllThePizzas
    LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
    Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?

    This is kind of what I was thinking too. Even when I was 150 lb overweight, I never got anything like this.

    I recall maybe 5-6 comments being made about my weight in middle school & junior high, and 2 times that rude things were said about it behind my back and I found out.

    I am grateful that I can't relate to this.

    Lucky for you on not being bullied. It happens everywhere BTW. I remember telling my dad in middle school and his words of wisdom were stand up this them. If you get suspended we both will explain to mom why.
    It clearly does not happen everywhere, because I have lived in many places and never once saw/heard it happen.

    Also, you say that as if it's bad advice. Your advice is what, then? Write a comic?
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    I am grateful that I can't relate to this.

    This
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    white-people-themed-parties.png
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    No, I can't.
  • Sharon_C
    Sharon_C Posts: 2,132 Member
    Yup. Got this a lot when I was in middle school. I had a name everyone called me that referred to me as not only the tallest in the class (it was a very small class) but also the fattest. I clearly remember being in a video arcade (I know that dates me) and a kid shoving me off the game I was playing saying, "Move over, fatty." I'm sure that person doesn't remember that at all, but it has stuck with me for the past 35 years.
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,149 Member
    Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?

    Iowa, USA is a good place to start. Specific towns would be Jefferson, Boone, Ames, Carroll, Des Moines, Cedar Rapids. If you're in Canada, St. John's, NL, is full of this, too.
  • cppeace
    cppeace Posts: 764 Member
    Cannot relate much to this
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Interesting. I was over 225 pounds in high school and bullied pretty bad (was even spit on and hit) but even I can't relate to this as a grown *kitten* adult. Or as a teen, as most of my bullying stemed not from my weight but from inability to fit in.
  • CindyMarcuzAdams
    CindyMarcuzAdams Posts: 4,007 Member
    I think I remember every comment and they still cut like hot knives thru butter. I thought when I got into high school things would change but no it got worse. I even had an employer say mean and rude things to me. Oh if I knew then what I know now.
    I truly and sincerely hope karma has raised her head for these people. They deserve what they get...
    Bitter much? Maybe but its made me the kind and considerate person I am today.
  • StephanieMClarkson
    StephanieMClarkson Posts: 1
    Friends:

    I am the person who wrote the original story (I am not the person who illustrated it). You can see the full story here, including my complete submission to the site, that the artist drew from (heh) to create the comic: http://empathizethis.com/stories/street-sizeism/

    First, I want to state that during the stories in question, depending where they happened, I ranged from 280 to 380lbs. This is not about people who are a little overweight, though I know for some of you, you will still have been harassed anyway.

    Second, the shouting from the car happened about 6 weeks ago, as I was walking along Massachusetts Avenue in Cambridge, Massachusetts (yes, home of Harvard and MIT). The guy who followed me along the street has actually happened twice; once in Raleigh, North Carolina, once in Somerville, MA. The guy who told me I'd only get laid if I got raped was in Toronto, Ontario (Toronto was also the place where I had a tiny little German accented woman ask me, "Do you know that you are very fat?" before trying to sell me weight loss pills. It was left out because it was practically slapstick, and not threatening the way these other stories are).

    It's actually happened to me in every city I've ever lived in. I once had a man mock me for my weight as I was leaving a Jenny freaking Craig in Atlanta, GA (I had, with JC's help, lost over 80lbs in the 7 months leading up to that time). I have lived over 3 years in all of the cities mentioned here; they're all east coast, but they're in 4 states/provinces and 2 countries, and both north and south of the mason-dixon line. This isn't just a problem in one place, or I'd probably have gotten past it.

    In addition, I actually carry myself pretty confidently; even when dieting, I've been pretty happy to be me. It's only when I get harassed that I actually really notice my weight (well, and when I try and sit on those really cheap folding chairs). I have actually wondered if part of it comes from *that*. I currently have blue hair. I wear retro polka dot dresses. I am what I am. I rarely attract the attacks that studies show come from seeming nervous or weak. I *do* attract harassment from people who seem determined to bring me down a peg.

    The point of 'Empathize This', the comic and website, is not to say, 'Boy, everyone's experience is JUST LIKE THIS', but instead to say, 'hey. This happens to people out there. Even if this isn't what happened to you, maybe you understand, or maybe you'll be aware, when you see it happening.'

    'It has never happened to me (so it doesn't happen)' is anecdotal. I wrote this specifically because it keeps happening, everywhere I go (Ironically, it ALWAYS happens when I'm alone; if I'm with friends or family I hear nothing of this sort; it's a dominance game, that uses my obesity as the target, not necessarily about the fat itself. But I've never lived anywhere that, when there was a chance, there wasn't the possibility some **** would try this).

    Good luck with your weight loss, but remember to love yourself in all your sizes. Your body is a continuum.
  • Blacklance36
    Blacklance36 Posts: 755 Member
    It's the same at the other end of the spectrum too. When my sister was underweight complete strangers seemed to think it was ok to make comments about it, or tell her to eat a cheeseburger, etc.

    There's a lot of ignorant people out there!

    I have heard both sides....its sad.

    Now I really want a cheeseburger though.....LOL
  • gypsy_spirit
    gypsy_spirit Posts: 2,107 Member
    I am glad to see so many speak out about not relating to this comic strip. I was overweight (by 100 pounds) for the last 25 years, I taught 5 year olds with no social filters, walked and ran at a local public track & went out in public all the time. Never once has anyone said or yelled anything like this to me.

    I wonder if it's more about the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they project. People are bullied every day - not just overweight people.


    ETA: I am in no way suggesting that the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they have gives anyone license to bully them.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?

    Iowa, USA is a good place to start. Specific towns would be Jefferson, Boone, Ames, Carroll, Des Moines, Cedar Rapids. If you're in Canada, St. John's, NL, is full of this, too.

    I've never seen anything like this (outside of middle school) anywhere in Missouri USA. What are you people doing up there to the north?!?
  • FattyFatsoMcTubby
    FattyFatsoMcTubby Posts: 170 Member
    I've never had a stranger say anything like that to me that I heard. I'm pretty sure they would have been afraid that I would sit on them.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    I am glad to see so many speak out about not relating to this comic strip. I was overweight (by 100 pounds) for the last 25 years, I taught 5 year olds with no social filters, walked and ran at a local public track & went out in public all the time. Never once has anyone said or yelled anything like this to me.

    I wonder if it's more about the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they project. People are bullied every day - not just overweight people.


    ETA: I am in no way suggesting that the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they have gives anyone license to bully them.

    I think you (and I at 225) weren't big enough to get it, assuming I'm understanding what the writer of the story is saying.
  • KaelaLee88
    KaelaLee88 Posts: 229 Member
    Oh yes, I think that most of us in our lives at some point have been on the receiving end of prejudicial abuse. There is a severe lack of understanding and empathy in our society that only looks to extremes of beauty as perfection and everything else falls short.

    As a woman who has lived with obesity for a number of years, the abuse I have received did not decrease after leaving education. I have been pushed into parked cars, I have been shouted at, I have been pushed, shoved, grabbed, oggled and openly talked about. I even experienced this when my Husband was proposing to me!

    I try to reserve my judgement of others, it's not up to me to criticise or assess them. I try, instead to empathise with people and understand what makes them who they are.

    Kaela x

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