Help fat and depressed

sun_fish

This is a great post, hope you find it helpful :
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1346163-change-your-mindset

Calliope610

516 days ago, I weighed 232lbs. Today I weigh 179lbs. And all I did to lose the weight was to eat a little bit less (about 400-500 calories/day) and move a little bit more (about 2-3miles walking per day). As I continue to follow that plan, I expect to lose another 20-40lbs. That is a strategy I can follow for the rest of my days. (of course, once I get to maintenance, I will not have to eat at a large deficit, but I will continue to log my food and move more.)

BTW, I was 50 when I started this.

wilmnoca

Your first sentence has already ensured your failure! STOP DIETING! IT DOESNT WORK!!! Change your lifestyle.

That is all

shadowjack1965

Hi there!

This is, I believe, my first post on these forums, never really paid attention to anything other than the daily logging.

I, like so many of us, was up and down on my goals. lost 38 lbs a few years ago, quit then gained it all back. I've watched these incredible "lost 100 lb" journeys my friends and family were on but could never seem to find the motivation. I hate how I look, despised it when family would tag me in pictures in FB, kept a profile pic up from 11 years ago when I was 90 lbs lighter, etc.

My uncle is a very tall man but also bigger. He had two knee-replacement surgeries and he'd warn me time and again about losing weight otherwise I'd be going down that same road. Today my knees hurt WAY too much and I realize he's right.

I was EXACTLY where you are today. EXACTLY. I would eat even when I felt bloated and full. I would eat for the taste. Eat for the pleasure of it. I would just eat for no reason.

For me the first step was getting alone, getting quiet, and going to war with my head. The complacency had been in control for WAY too long, and my stomach had become a petulant, spoiled child, mostly because I indulged it's every whim and gave it whatever it wanted the moment it asked for it. So I had to convince myself that it was time to get control and here's a couple things I told myself.

1. You're going to be hungry. Deal with it: A big part of this journey we're all on is convincing our bodies that we cannot remain full 24/7. That was big for me anyway, and I'm happy to say I overcame that obstacle. The good news is your body is pretty adjustable, and after a while the "ZOMG IF YOU DON'T EAT THAT CAKE RIGHT NOW I'M GOING TO DIE!" demands of my stomach eased off.

2. Like everyone else said, set reasonable goals.

3. Consider an accountability group. I've never done one but I hear they can be helpful. My cousin's wife is a Beachbody.com trainer and she hosts them but in order to participate you need to be part of that program and drink the Shakeology drinks. I'm not there yet, mostly because they're expensive (about $4.00 per meal) and I'm not 100% convinced with the results. You can lose without any sort of shakes or other supplements, so you just need to find what works for YOU. I personally am doing a regular breakfast shake in the morning, eat something reasonable for lunch, (for me it's usually an apple, orange and a jello cup with fruit in it (or two).

4. Stick with it. We're all in this and we're all on the same journey. You CAN do this. I've only been at it this for about two weeks this time. I set very small goals for myself and so far am happy with the results. I also just started back at a gym for the treadmill. I have a treadmill in my basement but it has a 250 lb weight limit and I outweigh that sucker by too much (for now). So I'm doing the gym for walking and basic cardio until I can get myself back from this terrible plateau I've reached and back into something a bit more sane when it comes to weight. I'm down 14 so far as of this morning I believe but those results probably aren't normal. I've discovered that when you're a big dude you can drop 10-20 lbs pretty quickly just by changing up a few things.

5. Good luck, have fun, and stick with it. I'll send you a friend request if I can figure it out. First time doing this and all.

themedalist

Well done on your 10lb off, I hope I can get motivated this time xx

I think you are giving motivation too much power. Motivation will come and go. And frankly, you don't need it in order to succeed at your weight-loss goals. What you need instead is a decision to lose weight backed up by a commitment to make it happen.

This blog post is one of my favorites:

http://www.vicmagary.com/blog/fitness-motivation/

Mischievous_Rascal

Well, first off, welcome back to MFP. Secondly, I know exactly how you feel, because I've been there, too. It's a horrible feeling. But you have to give yourself some credit, now. You know it's time for you to get control back, and that is incredibly positive. Embrace that and give yourself a pat on the back for it!

What I love best about this site is the vast amount of information and advice that's available from people who have done what you're about to do. And knowledge is power, right? I'm going to bomb you with information now, but these two links (and all the links listed in them) changed everything for me. I highly suggest taking some real time to read through and digest them, and then figure out what is going to work for you, personally. Then it will start to feel like this whole process belongs to you, and you'll start to gain confidence in the fact that you can get it done this time. Best of luck!

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/974889-in-place-of-a-road-map-short-n-sweet

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

DerekVTX

I am actually crying , thank you all for supporting and motivating me, thank you for caring to take the time, I am starting NOW X

^^^^
If there was a "LIKE" buttong for this post I would definately hit it!

DerekVTX

Well first time I have been on the scales in over a year , bloody battery had gone, found a new one 223.6 lb have now logged it. I will get lighter every day x

Yes you will. If it fluctuates up and down a bit it is ok. Our bodies do that!

Personally I weight myself once a week.....you may really discourage yourself by weighing daily as like the person above stated our bodies will fluctuate a bit. Also I do it first thing in the morning when i wake up for consistancy as your evening weight is often higher than your morning weight.

CelesteBeachbodyCoach

Awe ihate the title to you post =( No one should be depressed in ther eown skin. i am a beachbody coach, so if you need any help at all, please message me.. Id love to help you

onecatleadstoanother

It's not a diet it's a lifestyle change

RinnyLush

Hey!

No sense in shaming yourself, hun! You know what track to get on. Just be patient, consistent, and remember that everything is alright in moderation. Stick to your plan, don't deprive yourself, and keep at it! You can do this. :flowerforyou:

Also, I wanted to add that the tone of your post struck a bit of a nerve with me. I feel terrible that YOU feel so terrible. Remember that this is the only body you get, and you have every right to take pride in it and celebrate being alive at any size. There are so many beautiful things your body can do besides 'be thin'. While you are working through your weight loss journey, you might benefit from doing some reading up on body positive activism. Just to keep your spirits high and inspire a positive relationship with your body and the process. All the best!! :drinker:

kessler4130

And when you do get your macros set, don't try and make adjustments on a daily basis, run them out for atleast 3 weeks and you will know exactly how your body is responding, weighing yourself daily will make you crazy. I can weight anywhere from 201 to 206 on a daily basis depending on hydration, sodium intake, large amounts of low calorie dense foods, etc.

CupcakesMom2

Friend request sent. You can do this! I am 51 and have had alot of the same feelings as you do. Getting in control of what you are eating helped me feel alot better emotionally and physically.

cwood2002

So let's start with the positives... You have a will to change something you don't like about yourself AND you have the ability to make it happen.
It only requires your active participation to make it reality. Throw away any crazy notion that you can drop 10-20 pounds in a week. Set realistic short term targets like 1-2 pounds week. Secondly, and this extremely important, you have to track yourself AND hold yourself accountable! Log everything: the good, the bad, the ugly. MFP is a great tool for that.
Over time, if you stick with it, you'll see yourself making progress and it will energize you and change your outlook.

Something else to add... as log as you track it and plan for it, you can still make room for some of the foods you like. My "have to have" is chocolate. I leave a little calories at the end of the day for 1 Russell Stover sugar free pecan cluster. At 80 calories, it doesn't undermine my efforts of the day.

This!! Always start with the Positives

themedalist

Hi there!

This is, I believe, my first post on these forums, never really paid attention to anything other than the daily logging.

I, like so many of us, was up and down on my goals. lost 38 lbs a few years ago, quit then gained it all back. I've watched these incredible "lost 100 lb" journeys my friends and family were on but could never seem to find the motivation. I hate how I look, despised it when family would tag me in pictures in FB, kept a profile pic up from 11 years ago when I was 90 lbs lighter, etc.

My uncle is a very tall man but also bigger. He had two knee-replacement surgeries and he'd warn me time and again about losing weight otherwise I'd be going down that same road. Today my knees hurt WAY too much and I realize he's right.

I was EXACTLY where you are today. EXACTLY. I would eat even when I felt bloated and full. I would eat for the taste. Eat for the pleasure of it. I would just eat for no reason.

For me the first step was getting alone, getting quiet, and going to war with my head. The complacency had been in control for WAY too long, and my stomach had become a petulant, spoiled child, mostly because I indulged it's every whim and gave it whatever it wanted the moment it asked for it. So I had to convince myself that it was time to get control and here's a couple things I told myself.

1. You're going to be hungry. Deal with it: A big part of this journey we're all on is convincing our bodies that we cannot remain full 24/7. That was big for me anyway, and I'm happy to say I overcame that obstacle. The good news is your body is pretty adjustable, and after a while the "ZOMG IF YOU DON'T EAT THAT CAKE RIGHT NOW I'M GOING TO DIE!" demands of my stomach eased off.

2. Like everyone else said, set reasonable goals.

3. Consider an accountability group. I've never done one but I hear they can be helpful. My cousin's wife is a Beachbody.com trainer and she hosts them but in order to participate you need to be part of that program and drink the Shakeology drinks. I'm not there yet, mostly because they're expensive (about $4.00 per meal) and I'm not 100% convinced with the results. You can lose without any sort of shakes or other supplements, so you just need to find what works for YOU. I personally am doing a regular breakfast shake in the morning, eat something reasonable for lunch, (for me it's usually an apple, orange and a jello cup with fruit in it (or two).

4. Stick with it. We're all in this and we're all on the same journey. You CAN do this. I've only been at it this for about two weeks this time. I set very small goals for myself and so far am happy with the results. I also just started back at a gym for the treadmill. I have a treadmill in my basement but it has a 250 lb weight limit and I outweigh that sucker by too much (for now). So I'm doing the gym for walking and basic cardio until I can get myself back from this terrible plateau I've reached and back into something a bit more sane when it comes to weight. I'm down 14 so far as of this morning I believe but those results probably aren't normal. I've discovered that when you're a big dude you can drop 10-20 lbs pretty quickly just by changing up a few things.

5. Good luck, have fun, and stick with it. I'll send you a friend request if I can figure it out. First time doing this and all.

Beautifully stated! I agree completely! Also, OP, you do not need to pay for an accountabilty group. MFPers will frequently start Challenges (running a month or even longer) where folks will sign up, support each other, and regularly report on their progress. Look for Challenges under the Groups area of MFP. Many start the beginning of the month.

hearthwood

PLEASE get rid of any "diet" plan you intend to use. They don't work for long term weight loss success. Eliminate the word diet from your vocabulary/ It's a scary word--and it is intimidating. Immediately a person starts thinking of things you'll never be able to eat again, which are typically their favorite foods. That's not true. You can eat anything you want, just eat less of it. 2 slices of bread turn into 1, a piece of cake is now a sliver. It's all about portion control. Take a look at this for clarity.



People tend to forget the 1950's. I grew up in that era, we ate the same things that we eat today. No one was fat, it was rare to see someone that was overweight. The difference back then was--we ate a balanced meal of meat, potato's, vegi's, and the only time we had desert was on Sunday's. In fact, adults didn't really think of joining gym's and working out. We work out more today, than they did. Yet they were thin. Why? Portion control.

All weight loss is--is calories in versus calories out. If you're burning more calories than you consume in a day, you're going to lose weight. It's simple math, and a math that MFP does for you. Make certain you're weighing your food, be faithful about entering it on MFP, but don't eliminate anything from your plan.

You can start today. It doesn't need to be Monday. Eat less of the foods available, and move more. Take a walk for a little exercise.

Anyway, I'll be a motivating friend if you want to add me.

Good luck and Happy 4th of July.

Mejustme69

Friend request sent.
You can do it. I had to start thinking that this (tracking calories) is just my life now. No more diets. I am a breast cancer survivor, I am scheduled to stop my medication in March. My doctor just told me that losing weight will protect me more than my medicine...that's a pretty powerful statement. I have been losing slow...only 1 to 1.5 lbs a week...I stick to about 1500 calories, and walk 2 miles on my lunch breaks. It's a little frustrating to go so slow...but hey, in a year...50 lbs! You can do it!! You are worth it!

mamadon

I am 52 years old. I did it, and you can too! Don't even worry about motivation. There will be lots of times you won't feel motivated. You just do it any way. There's will be lots of days where you will go wayyyy over your calories goal. Keep going anyway. There will be times where you feel you just can't do this, or you feel overwhelmed. Just do it anyway.

Nenepairan

Please don't talk yourself down. We believe what we say to ourselves more than what others tell us. Accept that you have made mistakes in the past and move on. You are not perfect and will make more mistakes in the future but each time you have to forgive yourself and move forward. Today is the only day you have to worry about. It is the only day you have and the only one you can somewhat control. Forgive yourself for the past and make today the best day you can.

I log food and weight only to tell me where I am right now, not to beat myself up for what I have already done. It helps me make choices, takes the hard out of it.

You will do great this time if you just take it one day at a time and challenge yourself to make today the best day it can be. Guilt free!

ctierney04

Hi! I was/am fat and depressed too! I am currently about 100lbs overweight, and that is with an 18lb loss from my highest! It is really hard to get started, but you have to find one reason to push yourself (your own health, kids, spouse, etc) and just hang on to it! For me, it is being embarrassed about how I look and never having clothes that fit. My advice is to not look at it as a diet, but a lifestyle change. You can do it. And you don't have to go all in on the first day. Pick one new thing to work on each day/week- drinking all your water, cutting back on sweets, adding a few minutes of exercise to your day, etc. YOU CAN DO THIS!!