He doesn't even lift.

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Replies

  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Sex as a 'reward' just makes you a ho. He gives you weight lifting, you give him sex. Bad move. Sex should be mutual pleasure for fun, you guys, not reward for lifestyle changes, Sheesh!

    I like you.
  • Nikkisfitblog
    Nikkisfitblog Posts: 149 Member
    "I'd really like to try this position"

    kama-sutra.jpg

    Bahaha...this aint ever gunna happen, even though he does lift. Im way to heavy.
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    Let's reverse: How would you like being told by your boyfriend you had areas of improvement he'd like you to work on?

    My BF did that with me. I started swallowing cucumbers whole for practice, and before you know it, he quit complaining....

    Okay, well, now I'm in...

    ...for science and stuff.


    Don't judge me.
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    How about you sit down, like adults, and tell him that you would like him to start lifting with you because you think he would get hot/ter, and the various other benefits of weight lifting?


    You people make life unnecessarily hard.
  • sunglasses_and_ocean_waves
    sunglasses_and_ocean_waves Posts: 2,757 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    How about you sit down, like adults, and tell him that you would like him to start lifting with you because you think he would get hot/ter, and the various other benefits of weight lifting?


    You people make life unnecessarily hard.

    That's broscience!
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.

    Doesnt make them any less ridiculous.
  • sunglasses_and_ocean_waves
    sunglasses_and_ocean_waves Posts: 2,757 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.

    Doesnt make them any less ridiculous.

    The whole thread is ridiculous. But you said nice things about my chest yesterday so you get a full pass. :smile:
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.

    Doesnt make them any less ridiculous.

    The whole thread is ridiculous. But you said nice things about my chest yesterday so you get a full pass. :smile:

    I have found that a ratio of 4:1 Insults:compliments to be ideal. :)
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Taking a dump and reading this
  • Achrya
    Achrya Posts: 16,913 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.

    And I'd find them as hysterical and stupid as I find them now.

    And my SO did tell me I needed to workout (Or, to the point, that yes I was getting fat and not it wasn't cute). I felt neither abused nor unloved nor outraged and we certainly didn't get a divorce, as I'm sure the female interwebs would demand.
  • baba_helly
    baba_helly Posts: 810 Member
    'List of improvements??' :huh: If he isn't what you want now, he ain't ever gonna be. You can't change them, no matter how many 'suggestions you make.' Changes can only come from within ourselves. Choose the model you want at the start - like a car. There's no use buying a hatchback if you want a Monster truck in your deepest heart, lol.

    Sex as a 'reward' just makes you a ho. He gives you weight lifting, you give him sex. Bad move. Sex should be mutual pleasure for fun, you guys, not reward for lifestyle changes, Sheesh!

    lol

    Did you quote the wrong post? I have a gutter mind and I can't even see how that OP has anything to do with sex.
  • AsaThorsWoman
    AsaThorsWoman Posts: 2,303 Member
    Today my boyfriend txted and said "Do you want to go for a ride in an inflatable boat?"

    I txted back "Hell yeah! Let's do it!"

    It might be as simple as that.

    He might be all about it.

    You never know if you don't ask.
  • Flab2Fab27
    Flab2Fab27 Posts: 461 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.

    And I'd find them as hysterical and stupid as I find them now.

    And my SO did tell me I needed to workout (Or, to the point, that yes I was getting fat and not it wasn't cute). I felt neither abused nor unloved nor outraged and we certainly didn't get a divorce, as I'm sure the female interwebs would demand.

    h3820EBE1

    I like this response. People get comfortable n relationships and some honesty is definitely helpful if you've been letting yourself go( as I found myself a little while ago).

    However his OP sounds more like she's practicing a performance review or interview for an employee more than she sounds like a casual, " let's be more active" chat with somebody she's shared her naughty bits with.
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.

    And I'd find them as hysterical and stupid as I find them now.

    And my SO did tell me I needed to workout (Or, to the point, that yes I was getting fat and not it wasn't cute). I felt neither abused nor unloved nor outraged and we certainly didn't get a divorce, as I'm sure the female interwebs would demand.

    And ditto here. Equally ridiculous.

    This also happened to me and I am glad it did. I wasn't upset either.

    /shrug

    Guess I'm terrible at being a woman, but from the looks of things in here, doing it "right" isn't something I'd aspire to.
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
    Threads like this make me realize why I am single. I see nothing wrong with telling your SO that they need to shape up, but apparently, if you see flaws in your boyfriend, that means you think he isn't good enough for you.

    Why are people so hell-bent on accepting mediocrity from each other? Personally, I'm never going to be in a relationship with anyone in whom I don't see an impressive amount of potential. And once the relationship has been established, I'm not going to cut him any slack. If he's not trying to be the best he can be, I'm not interested. And I'd absolutely want him to hold me to the same standard. Don't you owe that to each other? Sure, there are tactful and untactful ways to go about pointing out flaws, but hopefully you know each other well enough to go about it in the right way.

    As for the OP ... if he's never tried lifting before, I think you should say to him "It would make me happy if you'd lift with me." It's a simple and direct road map to putting you in a good mood. Men love that. If he's tried lifting before and just doesn't have any interest in it, you might just need to let it go. You said it's not a deal-breaker, so just let it be what it is.

    You.

    I like you.

    Thanks for saving me the effort of typing every word of that.

    Ditto.

    I suppose I'm an horrible wife for telling my husband he should workout/start lifting with me. I clearly don't love him or like him as he is. Thank god the internet is here to tell me, once again, that voicing that your spouse/SO is anything other than perfect makes you an awful person.

    I guarantee if your SO told you that you needed to workout, the female interwebs would explode in outrage.

    And I'd find them as hysterical and stupid as I find them now.

    And my SO did tell me I needed to workout (Or, to the point, that yes I was getting fat and not it wasn't cute). I felt neither abused nor unloved nor outraged and we certainly didn't get a divorce, as I'm sure the female interwebs would demand.

    h3820EBE1

    I like this response. People get comfortable n relationships and some honesty is definitely helpful if you've been letting yourself go( as I found myself a little while ago).

    However his OP sounds more like she's practicing a performance review or interview for an employee more than she sounds like a casual, " let's be more active" chat with somebody she's shared her naughty bits with.


    Given the apparent drama this could generate at home, it appears that it was a wise idea to ask how to broach the topic.

    The OP is being logical and calm and thinking through a conversation she wants to have with her SO. To me, that's a point for her.
  • Listeninguponyou
    Listeninguponyou Posts: 507 Member
    I hope this thread gets more comments because... I found it kind of funny. I would just ask him. :/
  • SerenaFisher
    SerenaFisher Posts: 2,170 Member
    My SO would take a bullet for me, but he won't lift or do weighted sit ups.... Perhaps you will have more luck with your SO.

    So a guy taking a bullet for you isn't good fortune??? Some of you have no idea how good you have it. And if you don't like a guy with a soft middy, DON'T GO OUT WITH ONE.

    Just wait until age takes its toll on your boobies. Hopefully he won't be posting somewhere that he wishes you'd get implants.
    A) I made it clear he is good enough for me because ten years and marriage among our other hurtles have proven it.
    B) Our babies have already taken a toll on my body. He wasn't perfect due to this either but as I accepted he won't do weighted sit ups he accepted I have more than one shape. There is nothing wrong with either of our opinions. We are adults and can discuss at length desires and wants, especially after ten years and the ability to realize what is. I also have no problem with implants, he however already says they are big enough. Maybe his mind will change in ten years, and that will be a discussion we have at length.
    C) I did not say it wasn't good enough for me, and jumping to conclusions is not working out. ;)
  • jimmmer
    jimmmer Posts: 3,515 Member
    Just ask him.

    He can either say yes or no.

    Why do people make life so complicated for themselves? If he wants to do it, then cool. If he doesn't then that's cool too. It's not a massive deal.
  • DYELB
    DYELB Posts: 7,407 Member
    Lara Croft and Lana Kane don't lift either.

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