Break down my excuses

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Leah_62803
Leah_62803 Posts: 292 Member
I don't even know where to start... Ugh.

Let's see... I come from a mostly overweight family. I don't feel like we really ate unhealthily, just too much. As a child I was a skinny little thing. I started gaining weight as a teenager..nothing too bad but just started getting a little curvy (I'm 5'4). Then I started seeing my future husband and really started gaining. He comes from a very overweight, very unhealthy family. We were young and dating and going out to eat all the time. He loves me and has always wanted to spoil me, sometimes with food. After we got married I started eating more unhealthy and drinking sodas which I never really got at home.
Anyway, I stayed around 165lbs for a few years of not doing anything to lose. Then I got pregnant with our first child and got up to 180lbs...BUT lost it all easily a few months after he was born. I got down to around 150lbs with some exercise and watching what I was eating for the next year. Then my weight started slowly creeping up again and it stopped at the 165lb range again. Got pregnant with my daughter and went up to 190lbs. Once again most of it fell right after I had her and I ended up being at around 170lbs and then exercise and watching what I ate put me back down to 150-155lbs.

And then I don't know what happened. I think I was battling some postpartum depression. I just seemed to develope an "I don't care" attitude about what I ate. So of course the weight started piling on...and this time didn't stop at 165lbs like it always had. Suddenly I'm up to 190lbs!! So I started trying the normal exercise, watching what I eat thing that had always worked...nothing. I had my thyroid checked and rechecked. They say everything's normal.

So i have to do something different. I know that I need to get serious. I just don't know where to start. I also have a TON of excuses keeping me from starting. I feel like I know deep down that they are just excuses but I can't shake them.

So can you help me? Just tell me I'm dumb and what I should be doing?

#1- I don't feel like I have time to exercise. I work in an office fulltime. I picked up my kids at 4:30pm and go home to make dinner. Feed everyone dinner, spend time with kids, give baths, put kids down at around 8:30, spend time with husband, and then go to bed around 10. So what should I cut out? Should I make myself get up earlier or stay up later?

#2- I can't afford/don't have time to cook seperate meals for myself. This is a tough one for me. Is there a website somewhere that has kid friendly "diet" meals? I don't want them to suffer!

#3- I can't do it. I really feel like I'm wasting my time. I have always wanted to get down to 130lbs but I haven't ever made it. And now I'm so much heavier than I was! I'd have to lose 60lbs!
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Replies

  • qmmanager69
    qmmanager69 Posts: 71 Member
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    Hi! As a fulltime working mom of 2 boys, I get it. It's tough to do it all and find time for you. Here are my immediate thoughts:

    #1. Make the time you spend with your kids more active and healthy. We go for walks, play wii fit video games on nasty days, crank up the tunes and dance around the living room like lunatics, bounce on the trampoline, go to the Y swimming etc...

    #2. Check out skinnymom.com. It's a great site that has ideas for healthier versions of foods we all love. She even has a crock pot section that's aweseome.

    #3. I have rheumatoid arthritis and some days can barely get out of bed, as well as the busy life described above. I've managed to stick to my 1200 calories, work out daily in some form or another and lose 20 pounds in 3 months. It can be done, we Moms just have to be creative.

    Best of luck to you.
  • cgvoabc
    cgvoabc Posts: 18 Member
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    OK, here goes:

    I'm married and we have three kids (2 5 year old b/g twins and a 1 year old girl).

    #1. Let's be honest; the hardest part of our day involves taking care of our kids. We know it's something we have to do so I decided to change how I spent time with my kids. Before deciding on getting healthy time with my kids was spent sitting while they played; I totally changed that. Now I'm an active participant in my kids activities in one way or another. I try and find a way to incorporate exercise for myself. I also wake up two hours earlier than I normally do and either do some weights, calisthenics or bike riding.

    #2. What I eat hasn't really changed; it's just how much of it I eat. Honestly; I try and eat the same portion sizes as my kids.

    #3. I tell myself that every morning at 4:30 as I get ready to exercise. Some days I lose the inner battle and decide to just sleep but most days I do work out.

    It's a long hard battle to weight loss but once the weight started coming off it got a little easier for me.
  • chrissyrenee1029
    chrissyrenee1029 Posts: 358 Member
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    #1- I don't feel like I have time to exercise. I work in an office fulltime. I picked up my kids at 4:30pm and go home to make dinner. Feed everyone dinner, spend time with kids, give baths, put kids down at around 8:30, spend time with husband, and then go to bed around 10. So what should I cut out? Should I make myself get up earlier or stay up later?

    #2- I can't afford/don't have time to cook seperate meals for myself. This is a tough one for me. Is there a website somewhere that has kid friendly "diet" meals? I don't want them to suffer!

    #3- I can't do it. I really feel like I'm wasting my time. I have always wanted to get down to 130lbs but I haven't ever made it. And now I'm so much heavier than I was! I'd have to lose 60lbs!

    You've already made a step in the right direction by acknowledging that you want to make changes in your life! So kudos for that! The first steps are always the hardest but it comes down to this: you're never going to see change without effort.

    So here's my breakdown :)

    #1 - If you have 30 minutes out of the day to watch television, you have 30 minutes that you can work out. It can be something as simple as walking up the street and back. Do you have stairs in your building at the office? If you have any down time, go climb a flight or two. Spend time with your hubby and the kids at the local park. Just get outside and be active :) Talk to your hubby and see if he'd be willing to work out with you. That way you can spend time together and get in your exercise too, so two birds, one stone!

    #2 - Make changes slowly. Introduce a new food or two here and there. My kids love potatoes, so one evening for dinner I took a chance and swapped out the mashed potatoes for boiled baby red potatoes tossed with a little bit of olive oil, salt and pepper. They LOVED it, and now they ask for them that way instead. Unless your kids are super picky eaters, you'll probably be surprised at the healthy dishes they'll like. Pinterest is my best friend for finding new recipes. If you don't have an account there it would be worth it to set one up.

    #3 - You can do absolutely anything you set your mind to and every day that you put it off is one more day that you're not getting healthier and happier. If anything, the time that's being wasted is the time that you're procrastinating in getting started. You just have to make up your mind that you're going to do it and do it!

    Good luck! And feel free to add me if you like!
  • MostlyWater
    MostlyWater Posts: 4,294 Member
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    When I had little kids, I took exercise class at night and after a while, I got a recumbent bike for the house. If you have an office job, walk during your lunch break. Think of ways to work in small bouts of exercise. Some people do squats at the copier or at the coffee machine; you do what works for you.

    It's more about eating than exercise though; the best thing is for everyone to eat healthfully. Don't fry chicken for the kids and bake yours; bake everyone's. Etc.
  • bvifun
    bvifun Posts: 402 Member
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    What?? You ONLY have 3 excuses? I spent a whole year breaking down excuses before I finally started and now I am within a pound of goal. I cannot help too much with the excuses where you use your kids as a reason. You can still eat the same foods you feed your kids - as I assume you are feeding your kids healthy food. It is about portions. My motto was ...everything that passes these lips gets recorded. So if you clean up their plates - record that.

    Do you think exercise MUST be in the gym, it must be hours long and it must be what someone else tells you to do? Uh, uh. It can be walking, dancing to a video, lifting bags of flour instead of weights. Due to medical problems I can do very little physically, so I know weight can be lost concentrating on what is eaten.

    You do need to ask yourself honestly if you are ready and why you want to do it. Ask yourself like you would ask a friend....without judgement. Crawl before you walk, walk before you run and only then RUN.

    Good luck.
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
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    Take a look at this thread; it's great: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1235566-so-you-re-new-here

    As for the excuses:

    #1. It looks like you've gotten some good advice already! Think of what you do during your day. Is there time that you spend just chillin' that you could spend at least part of exercising? Would you be willing to be a morning exercise person? Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred and Kickboxing Fast Fix are workouts that are only 20 minutes. Her other workouts might be 20 minutes, as well, but I haven't tried those. You could take the kids and the husband for a walk in the evenings, or just go for a walk by yourself during your lunch break or something. If your only goal is to lose weight, you don't even need exercise- just a calorie deficit. However, if you want to feel & look better, be stronger, healthier, and more fit, you'll need to get up and get moving. Find your thing and run with it!

    #2. Do you like using the crock pot? You could make a couple of big meals to have throughout the week. Pinterest has a lot of ideas for freezer meals. So that might help your money and time budgets. You could probably do a search on there for kid-friendly meals to get some ideas!

    #3. You've taken some big steps toward your goal by coming here! A big part of this is the mental component. Are you ready to put in the work and do what you need to in order to reach your goal? That's where I've failed in the past... I wanted to lose the weight, but I wasn't ready to put in the work or stop eating what I now know was roughly 2500-3500 calories a day. I finally reached a point where I was ready, and am finally seeing things happen. So go get it and I wish you the best of luck!
  • Leah_62803
    Leah_62803 Posts: 292 Member
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    Thank you all. I think this is what I need.

    Trust me, I do have more than just 3 excuses! Lol. I just didn't want this post to go on and on and on... :)

    My kids are 5 years old and 3 years old. I really do need to get up and play more. Our time together is mostly cuddling on the couch or being in the backyard, but I'm sitting down on the porch while they play. Maybe I can introduce some games of tag or something. I love the idea of going for walks as a family. That's another dumb excuse I have. That my kids are too young/old to go for walks. They are too old to sit in a stroller but too young to walk far or fast....but I need to realize that anything is better than nothing.

    I don't think that we eat unhealthy. My kids are actually pretty good at eating veggies. Both of my kids LOVE green beans. We do eat stuff like macaroni and cheese or mashed potatoes sometimes but I never fry anything and I try to have fresh veggies and sometimes fruit with dinner. My biggest problem is my portions. It's nothing for me to eat two big plates of dinner. I constantly feel bloated and full. It's not a pleasant feeling so I'm not sure why I do it to myself. :(

    I'm still going to struggle with feeling like I can't do it. I've been telling myself that I'm going to do this every day....and every single day I have the thought in my head that pops up and says "No, you're not." I keep thinking why should I even try if I know I can't really do it. I'll do good for a week or two, maybe lose a couple pounds, and then I'll mess up and go right back.
    Ugh! I think maybe this forum might help me though. Reading through it and hopefully making friends. I can't remember what site it was but I was a member somewhere and me and another person decided to be weightloss buddies. We'd email each other every day about what we ate and what exercise we got. It was really encouraging. But then the site ended up going out and we lost touch. :( I felt like that was the closest I ever got to actually making it.
  • chrissyrenee1029
    chrissyrenee1029 Posts: 358 Member
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    This site has definitely been a great thing for me. There have been several days that I just wanted to give up, but then I'd get a notification that someone had liked or commented on one of my posts, and it's truly motivated me to stick with it.
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
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    Prior to joining this site, I'd lose a few pounds, then gain that back plus some more! So this is definitely a helpful tool. Good luck to you and don't let anyone, not even yourself, tell you that you can't do this. You can! :flowerforyou:

    And remember...

    d71ec50bd4240ebfe5f72ef8fca73338_zps4faa4367.jpg
  • Leah_62803
    Leah_62803 Posts: 292 Member
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    Just wanted to give a little update... I didn't weigh myself before I posted this. I just knew that a couple weeks ago I was shocked and disgusted to see the scale say 190lbs.
    Finally weighed myself this morning and I'm actually up to 195!

    So that's just awesome.
  • Momjogger
    Momjogger Posts: 750 Member
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    There is some great advice here! I agree with the trying to be more active with the kids advice. I see Moms sitting around while their kids play sports or play at the park. I choose to go for a walk/run/pace/ or play with the younger kids while the older siblings are on the field (toss a ball, organize a game of tag,etc.) Taking the kids for a walk is simple and a great way to spend time with them. As far as meals are concerned, you can add a salad to your meal, extra vegetables, cut cukes and celery, and eat less of the entree. You can do this by making a couple of tweeks to start. These things are doable and effective. Have patience as you make small changes.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,867 Member
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    #1- I don't feel like I have time to exercise. I work in an office fulltime. I picked up my kids at 4:30pm and go home to make dinner. Feed everyone dinner, spend time with kids, give baths, put kids down at around 8:30, spend time with husband, and then go to bed around 10. So what should I cut out? Should I make myself get up earlier or stay up later?

    Can't your husband help out some here...maybe he can give the kids a bath while you go for a run or something. My wife and I are both into fitness and we take turns taking care of the household stuff...cooking, cleaning, minding our two boys, etc so that we can also get our fitness on. It is important to both of us.

    You could also get up earlier or stay up later....also turn normal little things into workout adventures. Example...this morning I'm watching my 2 y.o. while my wife takes my 4 y.o. to a birthday party...what to do? Well, I need to do some shopping for dinner tonight...I'm making a Gazpacho to serve with some bacon, basil, and tomato sandwiches. So...instead of loading up in the hot car and driving to the grocery store, I'm loading up my boy in my bicycle trailer and we're heading about 10 miles (each way) out of town to a small local farm where he can pet some animals and I can pick up some fresh produce and good homemade bread for the sandwiches. I get some exercise, get the shopping taken care of, and he's entertained....WIN, WIN, WIN!
    #2- I can't afford/don't have time to cook seperate meals for myself. This is a tough one for me. Is there a website somewhere that has kid friendly "diet" meals? I don't want them to suffer!

    You don't need "diet" meals. I'm the primary cook in our house and my cooking hasn't changed all that much save for I tend to cook with much less oil these days....it's not so much about what you're eating...it's how much. Just cook good wholesome meals and eat and appropriate serving...portion control and moderation, not deprivation and suffering. Deprivation and suffering aren't necessary and will only lead to you failing to achieve your goals.
    #3- I can't do it. I really feel like I'm wasting my time. I have always wanted to get down to 130lbs but I haven't ever made it. And now I'm so much heavier than I was! I'd have to lose 60lbs!

    Why are you so fixated on this arbitrary number? Focus on the process of becoming a healthier and more fit individual...weight loss and being at and maintaining a healthy weight are bi-products of living a healthful life. Stop focusing on some arbitrary number that may or may not even be appropriate for you. I could him and haw all day about wanting to be 160 Lbs....but that weight would be completely inappropriate for me given my frame and muscle mass....I would have to burn up a great deal of muscle to get to 160 Lbs.

    Again...you're far to focused on some arbitrary scale value. Focus on the process of being a better, healthier, fitter you and everything else will fall into place in time.
  • jessthep1rate
    jessthep1rate Posts: 47 Member
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    I agree with some of the replies- it sounds like you have a lot less excuses than I do, and I don't even have any kids to worry about! I think you'll do great once you figure out a way to make it all work.

    1. I have never been one to get really active in the morning. I just hate it. A lot of people find that it works best for them to do it that way, though, so by all means try it, especially if you feel like by the end of the day, you're way too wiped to even think about exercise. Just make sure that if you do, you're going to bed earlier to compensate! But what struck me is that you said between around 8:30 and 10, you're spending time with your husband--which is awesome! And that's a whole relatively untapped 1.5 hours. Try taking half an hour or an hour of that time to be active together, whatever your style is. You could do some Wii Fit games or other fitness games if you're into video games like that, or if you'd rather do something a little more "serious" there are plenty of resources online for at-home exercises, even some like stretches and resistance stuff that you can do together. That way, you'll still have some "down time" together, but you're using a portion of it wisely--and it's so much easier when you're not doing it alone!

    As for activities with the kids, depending on the safety of the streets in your neighborhood, maybe you could walk/jog alongside your kids while they ride bikes/trikes? Scooters? That might take care of the issue of them not being able to keep up with grownup strides. And what everyone else said about fitness games, playing actively outside with them, etc.

    2. As for not wanting your kids to suffer, does that mean you want to suffer yourself? Eating healthy and in good portions shouldn't feel like suffering. Like you, my problem has always been portion sizes, since I love fresh veggies and typically 'healthy' foods. For dinners, I would just take a look at exactly what you are eating on a regular basis. So for a while just log everything (EVERYTHING.) and take a look at it at the end of the day and see if you need to make changes to the type of food you're eating or just the portions. To be accurate, I would recommend getting a cheap kitchen scale--mine has been absolutely invaluable in logging my food every day. Make sure that anything you cook at home is entered as a recipe on MFP (which is very easy if you have not done it yet), so you can look at exactly how many calories/fat/sugar/etc. is in it. What I love about the recipe tool here is that if you enter your recipe and say it's, say, 4 servings, and the amount of calories is just kind of shocking, you can always just go, "oops!" and maybe change it to 6 servings, so you can make the portions smaller and still enjoy it. There is no reason to feel like you have to eat anything you don't like (or even NOT eat anything you do like!) just because you are trying to lose weight.

    3. As for feeling hopeless... we've probably all been there. Just focus on the day to day. If you are really stressed out and scared that you won't be able to make it down to 130, just think to yourself that you will do the best that you can, and celebrate every success you have. You'll probably be really surprised with yourself. Try at first just to drop 5 pounds, then another 5, etc. You'll get there!!!
  • ossentia
    ossentia Posts: 96 Member
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    Previous posters have great suggestions for your first two excuses so I'm going to jump straight to #3.

    It doesn't matter how much weight you have to lose. The days are going to pass by whether you work on the weight loss or not. In a couple of years, if you haven't done a thing about your weight, you'll either be the same size you are now or bigger. On the other hand, if you decide today to work on it, imagine where you'll be in two years. My biggest challenge was understanding that weight loss isn't a race and the changes I've made aren't going to be temporary. I've changed my lifestyle, and even though I am taking my time, the weight is coming off. In November of last year, I weighed 194 lbs. Today, I weighed in at 160. I still have a lot of weight to lose, but who cares? It's coming off, and I will reach my goal eventually. It may take me a few years. So be it.

    I'll also point out that it doesn't take getting to goal to feel great about yourself. Just losing these 30 lbs. or so has made me feel and look so much better. I'm wearing clothes I haven't worn in years. I can run without losing my breath. I have energy I never realized I was missing. That has been very motivating for me.
  • mymodernbabylon
    mymodernbabylon Posts: 1,038 Member
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    #1- I don't feel like I have time to exercise. I work in an office fulltime. I picked up my kids at 4:30pm and go home to make dinner. Feed everyone dinner, spend time with kids, give baths, put kids down at around 8:30, spend time with husband, and then go to bed around 10. So what should I cut out? Should I make myself get up earlier or stay up later?

    Go for a walk with your kids or ask your husband to watch them while you go walking/exercise OR ask your husband to be part of your exercise so you are spending time together while doing something for your health.

    #2- I can't afford/don't have time to cook seperate meals for myself. This is a tough one for me. Is there a website somewhere that has kid friendly "diet" meals? I don't want them to suffer!

    You don't need to change what you eat, just the portion sizes. I've not stopped eating the things I like and I've still lost weight by making small changes in portion size and making my lunches much more healthy.

    #3- I can't do it. I really feel like I'm wasting my time. I have always wanted to get down to 130lbs but I haven't ever made it. And now I'm so much heavier than I was! I'd have to lose 60lbs!

    Don't focus on 130 right now. Focus on what you've achieved in the past...getting down to 150-155 sounds like it was doable for you and you were able to keep it off for a period of time. Head for that and see if you can keep it off for a while. And if you feel ready, then try to go down a bit further. BABY STEPS!
  • Aero1dynamic
    Aero1dynamic Posts: 702 Member
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    I'm sure I won't say anything that hasn't been said but here goes...

    1: Not every moment in our days MUST be spent giving our undivided attention to our children/spouses. If this is something you are serious about, talk to them about it. I'm sure your husband would love to support you in this and take the kids off your hands for 30 minutes. Who knows?? They may even all want to join you in your workouts!

    2: ALL DIETS ARE FADS. Some work for some people. Others work for other people. It isn't WHAT you eat but how MUCH of it you are eating. Figure out your BMR/TDEE and TRACK TRACK TRACK, even down to the lowliest grain of sugar you lick from your finger in the morning while feeding the fam.( it's not hard).

    3: All I can say to this one is get off your rear and start doing YOU. If you keep telling yourself you CAN'T do it, then I'll agree. You can't. Not with that mindset. Once you start saying I WILL do this, change will begin and you will be much happier for it.
  • KandGRanch
    KandGRanch Posts: 131 Member
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    I don't even know where to start... Ugh.

    Let's see... I come from a mostly overweight family. I don't feel like we really ate unhealthily, just too much. As a child I was a skinny little thing. I started gaining weight as a teenager..nothing too bad but just started getting a little curvy (I'm 5'4). Then I started seeing my future husband and really started gaining. He comes from a very overweight, very unhealthy family. We were young and dating and going out to eat all the time. He loves me and has always wanted to spoil me, sometimes with food. After we got married I started eating more unhealthy and drinking sodas which I never really got at home.
    Anyway, I stayed around 165lbs for a few years of not doing anything to lose. Then I got pregnant with our first child and got up to 180lbs...BUT lost it all easily a few months after he was born. I got down to around 150lbs with some exercise and watching what I was eating for the next year. Then my weight started slowly creeping up again and it stopped at the 165lb range again. Got pregnant with my daughter and went up to 190lbs. Once again most of it fell right after I had her and I ended up being at around 170lbs and then exercise and watching what I ate put me back down to 150-155lbs.

    And then I don't know what happened. I think I was battling some postpartum depression. I just seemed to develope an "I don't care" attitude about what I ate. So of course the weight started piling on...and this time didn't stop at 165lbs like it always had. Suddenly I'm up to 190lbs!! So I started trying the normal exercise, watching what I eat thing that had always worked...nothing. I had my thyroid checked and rechecked. They say everything's normal.

    So i have to do something different. I know that I need to get serious. I just don't know where to start. I also have a TON of excuses keeping me from starting. I feel like I know deep down that they are just excuses but I can't shake them.

    So can you help me? Just tell me I'm dumb and what I should be doing?

    #1- I don't feel like I have time to exercise. I work in an office fulltime. I picked up my kids at 4:30pm and go home to make dinner. Feed everyone dinner, spend time with kids, give baths, put kids down at around 8:30, spend time with husband, and then go to bed around 10. So what should I cut out? Should I make myself get up earlier or stay up later?

    #2- I can't afford/don't have time to cook seperate meals for myself. This is a tough one for me. Is there a website somewhere that has kid friendly "diet" meals? I don't want them to suffer!

    #3- I can't do it. I really feel like I'm wasting my time. I have always wanted to get down to 130lbs but I haven't ever made it. And now I'm so much heavier than I was! I'd have to lose 60lbs!
    I wake up at 4:30 to care for livestock, usually get my first cup of coffee around 8:30-9. I bake all our bread, make soap, grow and raise our food, sell produce and live animals, and still manage a workout. I do all the cooking , cleaning, and care.

    To hell with kid friendly. Cook what they need, not what they want.

    You
  • 7elizamae
    7elizamae Posts: 758 Member
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    I have two boys, too. They are teens now, so it's much easier. But I remember those days of young ones and all the care they needed. It did feel hard to make time for myself!

    I suggest getting up early and trying the Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. I used this recently to reboot my workouts and just loved it! I made so much progress -- it was very motivating. They are short workouts -- right around 25 minutes including the warmups and cool-downs. You can do them quietly right in your living room without waking your little guys.

    And I echo other moms on this thread who suggested you not make special meals for the boys -- same meal for everyone with good portion control for you. Get a food scale and start logging.
  • raydawnmaluga895
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    1. For me I get up at 4:00am This gives me time a. too myself before my special needs son gets up at 5 am. I try to have a coffee (while watching a tv show) I then grab my headphones and exercise on my eliptical for 20-30 minutes.

    2. i eat regular everyday meals based on what I feel is good for me and my family. I have learned. 1 sausage, 4 perogies, and lots of carrots is great ( but weigh and measure, stick to portion size) its amazing how full a person feels on what seems like such a small amount. . HAve chicken fingers and fries, again stick to portions. try potatoe fries for you/ regular for everyone else if the dont like. its really easy to add an extra little something if you need to. sometimes i make 3 different foods for a meal 1 healthy, 1 unhealthy, and vegetables. Just cause everyone else is having a baked potatoe smothered in butter doesnt mean you need the butter or sour cream, replace the fat with something else that works. portions, portions, portions. I eat the foods i like whenever and have lost 157lbs in a year and ahalf. i watch my portions but dont diet. its all about lifestyle choices.

    Sometimes life can get complicated and we fill our lives with clutter get rid of some of the day to day issues. make more time to breathe.....:smile:
  • FitFroglet
    FitFroglet Posts: 219 Member
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    #1- I don't feel like I have time to exercise. I work in an office fulltime. I picked up my kids at 4:30pm and go home to make dinner. Feed everyone dinner, spend time with kids, give baths, put kids down at around 8:30, spend time with husband, and then go to bed around 10. So what should I cut out? Should I make myself get up earlier or stay up later?

    Could you batch cook meals? I often make a big pot of bolognese or chilli con carne (both heavy on veg, celery, carrots, onions, tomatoes, beans, etc) That way, on the days you're eating 'leftovers' you have more time to be active. Could the time with your kids be more active some days? Could you get up 10 minutes earlier and do some squats, lunges, high-knees, jumping-jacks, etc? 10 minutes a day is 1hr 10 minutes by the end of the week.

    #2- I can't afford/don't have time to cook seperate meals for myself. This is a tough one for me. Is there a website somewhere that has kid friendly "diet" meals? I don't want them to suffer!

    Like others have said, you really don't have to cook separate meals, portion control and going easy on extras/toppings/sauces will help keep calories under control. You could cook exactly the same food but just plate yours up slightly differently - 1/2 plate veg, 1/4 plate protein, 1/4 plate carb is a good starting point for low calorie meals.
    I found buying a smaller diameter plate helped me psychologically as I'm from a family that piles food on the plate until it's full and it was tough to see an emptier plate - sounds daft I know but it helped me.

    #3- I can't do it. I really feel like I'm wasting my time. I have always wanted to get down to 130lbs but I haven't ever made it. And now I'm so much heavier than I was! I'd have to lose 60lbs!

    You absolutely can do it! Try to break the goal down into smaller chunks. I tend to cut mine into 7lb targets (am from the UK - 7lb is half a stone). You've found this place which as far as I've seen is very supportive, you've got the tools. Every pound you lose is a step in the right direction, the weight didn't go on overnight and it won't disappear overnight either; it WILL disappear though if you make changes. For me lots of small changes is easier for me rather than a huge upheaval.

    Best wishes and good luck!