Advice at the Gym

Galatea_Stone

If I see an attractive woman, I start spotting her without being asked

That happened to me once. On squats. :sick:

saynay18

A guy corrected my form at the gym and it annoyed me. I wasn't looking for advice, but I'm a novice. I know he was trying to be nice, but I just wanted to say "Who asked you?" I felt embarassed that he was helping me, ya know? IDK...just wouldn't suggest it unsolicited!

JTick

No. You don't know her program, or if she's working out with an injury.

I had to ask for a spot on my bench last week, and was excited that I got 90x5. Because I'm doing 5/3/1, I won't try for 95 until the end of August. The lady was trying to be "helpful" and told me to try for 95 next week. NO. Because that's not how this program works!

ZoeLifts

The only time I"ve ever said anything to someone is when they were on the leg press machine, had it loaded down with weights and were able to release the catch without having themselves set up and with their feet on the platform. Why? Because they were about to hurt themselves pretty bad and obviously didn't know how the machine actually worked. Other than that, I just let people be.

3dogsrunning

I do appreciate advice from people who know what they are talking about and who's goals align with mine. The problem is, far too any people *think* they know what's right.

wibutterflymagic

If I really looked like I was lost I would appreciate the help. Most people have no clue what they are doing and are too afraid to ask for help and then quit. I think that goes double for many overweight women.

Stage14

This is why I wear headphones at the gym.

yourpalsoap

I think in most cases, unless somebody is doing something with improper technique that's going to injure them, then it's better to keep out.

I strength-train 2-3 times a week and do a combination of light and heavy sets so that I can build strength and endurance and, honestly, it's rare that I DON'T get at least one guy telling me what to do. On heavy sets I get them saying "hur hur you need to do more reps with lower weight so you don't get bulky" (wrong!) and when I do lighter sets I get them saying I should be lifting heavy.

If you'd approached her later, when she was walking around rather than actually on the machine, and made conversation to find out what her goals are then it'd be different. But most of the time it's just going to come across as rude - you're basically assuming that you know more than her, and you might not. Same for the "cardio bunnies" you're criticising, who's to say they don't lift on separate days? Unless you work for the gym, it's not up to you to tell people what they should be doing.

KnitWit70

I have a hard time watching someone at the gym that could hurt themselves, mostly because I just love to help people, but it's hard to ignore. You know the type, we've all seen him. He's the guy who focuses primarily on his biceps (and usually has bird legs); he flings those dumbbells around so fast and jerky that you just KNOW he's going to end up pulling something... but I keep my mouth shut.

You see, 10 years ago (I was still in the Navy) I lifted and ran regularly. At 5' 10 I was a very toned 145 pounds. Now, I am 235 (ish) and far from that toned (young?) woman I was. Regardless of what I know about lifting safely and effectively, no one wants advice from someone who doesn't LOOK like they know what they are talking about. I was trying to be helpful once and made a suggestion to this young woman (she was obviously very new to lifting) about her form to prevent strain on her back. Well, she took one look at me, sneered and basically told me to F*** off and mind my own business.

I learned my lesson!

Now I just do my own thing. I still find myself occasionally watching others in between sets or while waiting for a machine, but I keep all comments to myself.

bugaboo_sue

If you'd approached her later, when she was walking around rather than actually on the machine, and made conversation to find out what her goals are then it'd be different.

I would find this about as rude as someone telling me how I should be lifting.

Seriously.

brower47

No. It's not cool to correct people. You don't know anything about that person or why she's doing what she's doing. Unless she's doing something immeneny dangerous, please keep your over eager, uninformed helpfulness to youself. Unless they ask, then you have free reign (at least on the topic asked).

DYELB

I've seen people struggling or looking lost and those are the people who don't come back later because they feel intimidated.

This definitely played a role. I'm always glad to see the full-figured ladies at the gym, because I really want to see them kick *kitten*. Way more than the cardio bunnies with their magazines. I didn't want her to give up because it "wasn't working". She did look more than a little lost and uncertain.

I hope she comes back. Minus my awkward staring.

Chances are good there's a lot you're doing wrong too. I wouldn't be so quick to offer advice.

Cameron_1969

I enjoy it when I see men doing it all wrong at the gym.
I means seriously. .why would I WANT to help a dude get stronger and better looking than me!?

jlapey

I had a guy offer me unsolicited advice once. He was very nice, but his suggestion felt totally wrong and uncomfortable and went against the instructions clearly printed on the equipment I was using. I finished doing it his way because he was still within sight, but never did it that way again.

amandzor

I've seen people struggling or looking lost and those are the people who don't come back later because they feel intimidated.

This definitely played a role. I'm always glad to see the full-figured ladies at the gym, because I really want to see them kick *kitten*. Way more than the cardio bunnies with their magazines. I didn't want her to give up because it "wasn't working". She did look more than a little lost and uncertain.

I hope she comes back. Minus my awkward staring.

Chances are good there's a lot you're doing wrong too. I wouldn't be so quick to offer advice.

I absolutely am. I honestly wish someone would come correct my squat form. I know I'm doing it incorrectly, but am too embarrassed to ask.

GiveMeCoffee

I would be annoyed. Not your place, unless she asked you for advice or looked like she might hurt herself mind your own business. Yet another reason I love my home gym

jofjltncb6

20+ rep sets on leg press > 8 rep sets

DYE3setsof10foroptimalresultsalways?

brower47

I've seen people struggling or looking lost and those are the people who don't come back later because they feel intimidated.

This definitely played a role. I'm always glad to see the full-figured ladies at the gym, because I really want to see them kick *kitten*. Way more than the cardio bunnies with their magazines. I didn't want her to give up because it "wasn't working". She did look more than a little lost and uncertain.

I hope she comes back. Minus my awkward staring.

So you respect people that are overweight and working out but then dismiss them if they hit their goals and maybe look like "cardio bunnies"? This reeks of condescension and a superiority complex. You seem to make a lot of assumptions about people at the gym.

randomtai

That would have pissed me off and you might have gotten a punch in the face depending on my mood at the time. Mind your own business.

bugaboo_sue

This definitely played a role. I'm always glad to see the full-figured ladies at the gym, because I really want to see them kick *kitten*. Way more than the cardio bunnies with their magazines. I didn't want her to give up because it "wasn't working". She did look more than a little lost and uncertain.

I hope she comes back. Minus my awkward staring.

*makes sure to wear a sign stating "I AM NOT A CARDIO BUNNY!" when I do my cardio, especially when I am training for a race so that i don't get labeled because I"m doing a lot of cardio.*