2000 calories a day - still not gaining

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Replies

  • __freckles__
    __freckles__ Posts: 1,238 Member
    Are you in counseling at all? I'm just worried if you have body dysmorphia, even if you gain weight you will still see a "skeleton in the mirror."
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    1.) TDEE is an estimate
    2.) If you are not gaining- you are not eating enough and or are miscalculating what you are consuming.

    I don't exercise other then walking around the house and u and down the stairs ect,

    So how many calories DO I need then? or how much DO I need to eat?

    Assuming I dont eat enough is no good unless you can tell me why. dont think any of you are reading my question

    You aren't gaining. Then you aren't eating enough. Period.

    Please don't make this harder than it is It really is THAT simple. .
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    i agree with calculating your TDEE.
    Second- try lifting weight. Will add u muscles.

    it takes a lot of training, surplus, and supplements (especially for a woman) to gain significant muscle.

    I do not wish to gain muscle - only fat. I cannot do training or weight lifting, going to a gym is impossible for me

    then like others have mentioned, i think this is just a case of needing to up your calories.

    im intrigued, however, at your statement of not wanting to gain LBM but only fat.

    what is your ultimate goal? just curious.

    My goal is to be 10 stone and curvy. I want to have fat. I want to have cellulite ect. Looking "fat" is my goal. I know that sounds wrong but I have body dismorphic disorder and will not feel normal unless that is how I look

    I'll happily trade bodies with you!
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,323 Member
    Are you in counseling at all? I'm just worried if you have body dysmorphia, even if you gain weight you will still see a "skeleton in the mirror."

    this is a good point.

    if i missed it, i apologize, but OP, are you in recovery from an ED?

    it sounds to me like a little work on your relationship with yourself is in order.

    i do hope you reach all your goals, whatever they may be, and that you are truly happy with you, both inside and out.
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    Are you in counseling at all? I'm just worried if you have body dysmorphia, even if you gain weight you will still see a "skeleton in the mirror."

    I dont want to have counselling as they will persuade me to stay thin. I can see my ribs ect and I cant sleep due to pertruding hipbones causing pain when on side but I am unsure if that is in my head or real.

    in photos I look skeletal though
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    OP, you kinda came out swinging with your edit in your original post.

    If you aren't gaining, you need to eat more calories. If you aren't going for gaining LBM, you might still want to look into lifting. Not everyone gets tight and "toned" when they lift.

    Also, cellulite shouldn't necessarily be a body goal. You may gain body fat and not have cellulite.

    sorry its a touchy subject and I get a little defensive :/

    I understand that, and in my previous post I wasn't suggesting toning up. I was suggesting lifting for health. You can "look" however you want to, and aim your goals that way.

    That being said, cellulite does have certain genetic factors, so even though you may look "overweight," you may never seen any cellulite.

    Are you in counseling? Genuine sincerity here, not trying to be mean.
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    OP, you kinda came out swinging with your edit in your original post.

    If you aren't gaining, you need to eat more calories. If you aren't going for gaining LBM, you might still want to look into lifting. Not everyone gets tight and "toned" when they lift.

    Also, cellulite shouldn't necessarily be a body goal. You may gain body fat and not have cellulite.

    sorry its a touchy subject and I get a little defensive :/

    I really hope you are getting psychiatric help for your body dysmorphia.
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    Are you in counseling at all? I'm just worried if you have body dysmorphia, even if you gain weight you will still see a "skeleton in the mirror."

    this is a good point.

    if i missed it, i apologize, but OP, are you in recovery from an ED?

    it sounds to me like a little work on your relationship with yourself is in order.


    i do hope you reach all your goals, whatever they may be, and that you are truly happy with you, both inside and out.


    I almost died due to anorexia 10 years ago. I had weeks to live as I ate so little.

    I was in recovery for 4 years and now can eat normal but the sight of my bony body has plagued me ever since. I still feel I look anorexic
  • EricMurano
    EricMurano Posts: 825 Member
    Your estimates might be under because the estimation formulas are only generally effective.

    I suggest getting your metabolism measured at a clinic. The DEXA scan will give you an accurate estimate but also give you other data bout your body like a summary if your body composition, which is handy. It's always good to see if you have more visceral fat than your body needs. Excess visceral fat is bad for your health.

    There is a test where you lie down for 45 minutes wearing a breathing mask. That, I believe, is the most accurate way to get your basal metabolic rate but you don't get the extra data that a DEXA scan gives you.

    If you don't want to go down the clinical scan route then just up your daily goal by 100-200 a day and try that for a couple of weeks and see if that makes a difference. If it doesn't after two weeks then up it again. Keep doing that until you notice a difference.

    Another thing I've noticed is thing people doing weights training and eating more to support their bodies' need for more energy and protein. If I were a naturally thin person that's what I'd be doing, working out and eating a lot.
  • __freckles__
    __freckles__ Posts: 1,238 Member
    Are you in counseling at all? I'm just worried if you have body dysmorphia, even if you gain weight you will still see a "skeleton in the mirror."

    this is a good point.

    if i missed it, i apologize, but OP, are you in recovery from an ED?

    it sounds to me like a little work on your relationship with yourself is in order.


    i do hope you reach all your goals, whatever they may be, and that you are truly happy with you, both inside and out.


    I almost died due to anorexia 10 years ago. I had weeks to live as I ate so little.

    I was in recovery for 4 years and now can eat normal

    Congratulations on making it this far, but I would highly suggest seeing a medical professional about your mental issues, as you are clearly not well yet. I wish you all the luck in the world OP. :flowerforyou:
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Seek help asap. Nobody here can give you what you really need
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    Are you in counseling at all? I'm just worried if you have body dysmorphia, even if you gain weight you will still see a "skeleton in the mirror."

    this is a good point.

    if i missed it, i apologize, but OP, are you in recovery from an ED?

    it sounds to me like a little work on your relationship with yourself is in order.


    i do hope you reach all your goals, whatever they may be, and that you are truly happy with you, both inside and out.


    I almost died due to anorexia 10 years ago. I had weeks to live as I ate so little.

    I was in recovery for 4 years and now can eat normal but the sight of my bony body has plagued me ever since. I still feel I look anorexic

    Honestly, you do not look anorexic at all. You look perfectly healthy as is.
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    OP, I would suggest doing some research and finding a therapist who will work with you. They are out there and they are there to help you. I don't think you're going to find what you need here.

    I highly, HIGHLY recommend counseling--with the right person for you. I don't want to pass judgment on you, but it does seem as though you've replaced one extreme with another. I understand wanting to be healthy and alive, but you have to strive for that. Healthy.

    Good luck, sincerely.
  • _EndGame_
    _EndGame_ Posts: 770 Member
    Wish I could swap with you. I could nail 2000 calories in 1 sitting - easily!
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    [/quote]

    Honestly, you do not look anorexic at all. You look perfectly healthy as is.
    [/quote]

    This is what everyone tells me. I dont think they understand though. If someone wants to lose weight they are supported and applauded.

    I am ignored and given dirty looks saying I want to gain.
  • hookilau
    hookilau Posts: 3,134 Member
    Seek help asap. Nobody here can give you what you really need

    I agree.
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    OP, I would suggest doing some research and finding a therapist who will work with you. They are out there and they are there to help you. I don't think you're going to find what you need here.

    I highly, HIGHLY recommend counseling--with the right person for you. I don't want to pass judgment on you, but it does seem as though you've replaced one extreme with another. I understand wanting to be healthy and alive, but you have to strive for that. Healthy.

    Good luck, sincerely.

    I know you are right. Its just a hard thing to admit. My partner even tells me I am obsessed with calorie counting sights and choosing the highest calorie meal and eating until it hurts my stomach.

    I get such a thrill when I have gained though , even a little pound. its like a high

    the comments I get daily about how thin I look make me try harder. does not help
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    TDEE calculators are estimates. Your real TDEE might be a few hundred calories different.

    Do you use a food scale so that you are as accurate as you can be on calculating your calories? Normally people underestimate how much they are eating, but a person with history of ED perhaps has the opposite problem.

    Add more calorie dense foods so that you are not necessarily eating more volume, but getting more bang for your buck.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    I suggest getting your metabolism measured at a clinic.

    Alternatively, just track consistently and accurately. If after 4-6 weeks you aren't making progress towards your goal, increase your calories. Track consistently and accurately for another 4-6 weeks and reevaluate. Continue until you reach your goal. (If your weight doesn't change for a sufficiently long period of time, congratulations...you've found your maintenance calories/TDEE.

    TL;DR - knowing the actual number of your TDEE or BMR is almost entirely worthless. Being able to eat consistently on either side of TDEE depending on your goals is essential.

    (I'm answering more for those reading who are still trying to figure this whole weight gain (or loss) thing out. OP, I believe your most important problems to address right now are not in calculating your TDEE but in finding the right professional help for where you are psychologically right now. Address and fix that first and then worry about progress towards your weight goal.)
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member

    Honestly, you do not look anorexic at all. You look perfectly healthy as is.

    This is what everyone tells me. I dont think they understand though. If someone wants to lose weight they are supported and applauded.

    I am ignored and given dirty looks saying I want to gain.

    This is why you need to seek psychiatric counseling. Sometimes you have to go through a few therapists in order to find the one that you can build a relationship with. I had to go through 4 psychiatrists and 3 psychologists for my anxiety in order to find the one that I was compatible with.

    We can tell you you don't look anorexic or like a skeleton a million times, but all that matters is that YOU believe it. And you don't which is why you need to get help so one day you can look in the mirror and be happy with what you see.

    Truly, you look great and do not need to gain weight. Honestly, being fat and having cellulite is not something to strive for. I promise you it is not something you want. You could develop a number of health problems if you gain too much weight. That would be truly awful (trust me, I'm dealing with it now).
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    TDEE calculators are estimates. Your real TDEE might be a few hundred calories different.

    Do you use a food scale so that you are as accurate as you can be on calculating your calories? Normally people underestimate how much they are eating, but a person with history of ED perhaps has the opposite problem.

    Add more calorie dense foods so that you are not necessarily eating more volume, but getting more bang for your buck.

    I do use a food scale :) I tend to eat twice the recommended portion of cereal, pasta and rice. If I see the serving on the packet as 3 pieces then I will have 6 ect.

    I try to double what a serving normally is. with meat ect its a bit harder. I find carbs easier to eat in bulk
  • EricMurano
    EricMurano Posts: 825 Member
    I suggest getting your metabolism measured at a clinic.

    Alternatively, just track consistently and accurately. If after 4-6 weeks you aren't making progress towards your goal, increase your calories. Track consistently and accurately for another 4-6 weeks and reevaluate. Continue until you reach your goal. (If your weight doesn't change for a sufficiently long period of time, congratulations...you've found your maintenance calories/TDEE.

    TL;DR - knowing the actual number of your TDEE or BMR is almost entirely worthless. Being able to eat consistently on either side of TDEE depending on your goals is essential.

    (I'm answering more for those reading who are still trying to figure this whole weight gain (or loss) thing out. OP, I believe your most important problems to address right now are not in calculating your TDEE but in finding the right professional help for where you are psychologically right now. Address and fix that first and then worry about progress towards your weight goal.)

    I agree, just up the calories and see if it makes a difference.
  • mike_ny
    mike_ny Posts: 351 Member
    Try calculating your TDEE on www.iifym.com and eating more than that...

    For example mine is a couple hundred over 2000 and I'm shorter than you so I would suggest up-ing it

    My TDEE is 1537 calories a day

    No it isn't. If you're consistently eating 2000 calories a day and not gaining any weight, then your TDEE estimate is obviously too low. Assume that 2000 is your TDEE and work from there and you might have better luck.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    I suggest getting your metabolism measured at a clinic.

    Alternatively, just track consistently and accurately. If after 4-6 weeks you aren't making progress towards your goal, increase your calories. Track consistently and accurately for another 4-6 weeks and reevaluate. Continue until you reach your goal. (If your weight doesn't change for a sufficiently long period of time, congratulations...you've found your maintenance calories/TDEE.

    TL;DR - knowing the actual number of your TDEE or BMR is almost entirely worthless. Being able to eat consistently on either side of TDEE depending on your goals is essential.

    (I'm answering more for those reading who are still trying to figure this whole weight gain (or loss) thing out. OP, I believe your most important problems to address right now are not in calculating your TDEE but in finding the right professional help for where you are psychologically right now. Address and fix that first and then worry about progress towards your weight goal.)

    I agree, just up the calories and see if it makes a difference.

    But consistently and accurately. So many people who are trying to gain weight claim they're "eating as much as they can" or they're "eating all the time" but when they actually track, they find out they are subconsciously adjusting for it. They may stuff themselves at a particular meal but then skip the next meal or significantly cut back on calories. Same with eating more frequently...they simply eat a little less.

    Our bodies are remarkably adept at keeping us at certain set-points. To overcome takes a certain amount of discipline in consistency and accuracy. It isn't always enough to just "eat more" without knowing what the baseline is that you're trying to surpass.

    Signed,
    Once 6', 115 pounds
  • EricMurano
    EricMurano Posts: 825 Member

    But consistently and accurately. So many people who are trying to gain weight claim they're "eating as much as they can" or they're "eating all the time" but when they actually track, they find out they are subconsciously adjusting for it. They may stuff themselves at a particular meal but then skip the next meal or significantly cut back on calories. Same with eating more frequently...they simply eat a little less.

    Our bodies are remarkably adept at keeping us at certain set-points. To overcome takes a certain amount of discipline in consistency and accuracy. It isn't always enough to just "eat more" without knowing what the baseline is that you're trying to surpass.

    Signed,
    Once 6', 115 pounds

    Sure. I have always had a suspicion that naturally thin people just eat less than 'naturally fat' people like me. That they're idea of a lot is my idea of not much at all. I always challenge my naturally thin friends to come to a buffet with me and eat plate for plate to see when they can no longer eat.

    But in this case I'm giving the OP the benefit of the doubt. She's mentioned a few times that she IS eating as much as she thinks she is. To be honest 2000 calories sounds middle of the road (on average, of course we all have different metabolisms, but not by that much)
  • mangogirl272727
    mangogirl272727 Posts: 95 Member
    There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to gain, as long as you don't become overweight (as there are several health risks associated with being overweight). 2000 is a pretty average maintenance intake for a woman honestly; you're going to have to fit in a lot more in order to gain...I'd say 2500 at a minimum, more if you can. It's all about those calorie dense foods man:
    -Pancakes (easy to make dairy free by subbing almond or soy milk for cow milk) with lots of vegan butter and pure maple syrup
    -peanut and almond butter
    -trail mix (dried fruit, nuts, chocolate)
    - chocolate (dark, milk, or semisweet is all fine considering your trying to gain, but do try to stay away from candy bars with all their added unhealthy crap)
    -big bowls of granola in soy or almond milk
    -coconut milk ice cream
    -Try blending coconut milk into smoothies--it's very high cal but still healthy
    -avocados
    -sub chicken thighs for chicken breast
    -sub 80% ground beef for lean ground beef or ground chicken
    -FATTY FISH is your friend! SO good for you but very high cal: salmon, mackerel, sardines
    -high cal protein bars/ PRO BARS=high cal, yummy, healthy
    -dates filled with peanut butter...sooooo good
    Since you can afford it, why not make some tasty desserts like chocolate chip walnut cookies, blueberry muffins, homemade scones with jam? Just switch out the butter for vegan butter and the milk for almond/soy milk so as not to irritate your dairy allergy.

    Also, for your peace of mind, I would recommend seeing a counselor about your body dysmorphia.
  • mkfoster9
    mkfoster9 Posts: 15 Member
    You have to log accurately for any method coming from this forum to work for you. if you have intermittent internet, write it down, then put it all in when you can. It is VERY LIKELY that if you are logging from memory or guessing about your serving sizes and intake, you're getting things wrong, which is why everyone keeps mentioning it.

    Without good logs, it's hard for us to even suggest what you might do differently.


    One thing no one has mentioned is to check and see if you are in ketosis from too much protein - if you're sensitive to carbs, this can be an issue.


    You can check this with ketone strips from a drug store.
  • hookilau
    hookilau Posts: 3,134 Member
    One thing no one has mentioned is to check and see if you are in ketosis from too much protein - if you're sensitive to carbs, this can be an issue.
    You can check this with ketone strips from a drug store.

    I'm pretty sure ketosis doesn't work that way =)
  • JamieD328
    JamieD328 Posts: 976 Member
    I don't feel like reading everyones comments, so in case it wasn't said: Hyperthyroidism, celiac and crohns can all make it difficult to maintain or put on weight. Not sure about diabetes, since most diabetics I've known have had the opposite problem. And I'm in no way a medical professional so I'd just wait to see what the doc says on testing to be sure.
  • super_belle
    super_belle Posts: 16 Member
    OP, I would suggest doing some research and finding a therapist who will work with you. They are out there and they are there to help you. I don't think you're going to find what you need here.

    I highly, HIGHLY recommend counseling--with the right person for you. I don't want to pass judgment on you, but it does seem as though you've replaced one extreme with another. I understand wanting to be healthy and alive, but you have to strive for that. Healthy.

    Good luck, sincerely.

    This, best of luck to you! :flowerforyou: