drowning!
185dengbiqi
Posts: 36 Member
why is this so hard for me? I am so frustrated and unmotivated, i cannot stick to plans i make, goals i set myself....
need help, advice, inspiartion anything......
need help, advice, inspiartion anything......
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Replies
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anybody0
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Set really tiny goals! Like, really easy ones. Ones that make you go, "pffft, I can do that in my sleep."0
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Hey.
Can't see your diary so I don't know if maybe you are setting goals that are too hard?
Don't buy into the - 'you must eat clean' or 'cut out sugar' or 'cut out fat' or try this amazing diet mind sets.
Just set a small loss for each week, eat the food you enjoy (within calorie and macro goals) add some exercise if you like then reassess as you go. Good luck
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Are you following MFP? What are your goals?0
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I am not setting any goals other than to lose weight, i just cant stick to my calories, be bothered to exercise ...0
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I am one week extremly motivated, eating well, burning calories then i just give up, be lazy eat crap ???? whats that all about?0
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Your not going to drown if your reaching out for help we won't let you!
Maybe you are setting your goals to high? Are they what you really want? Have you ever heard of S.M.A.R.T goals? Google this! It really helps me to break down my goals so I know what I can achieve and realistically by when.
Don't be so hard on yourself. Look at how many times people have failed things before they went on to achieve great success
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What is the problem with sticking to your calories? Are you allocating enough calories to begin with? Are you eating under or over? Why can't you be bothered with investing some time on your health?0
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How many calories do you have to work with? If it's 1200 then that's going to be a struggle for anyone. Not knocking it, I've done it myself but 1500 or 1700 or 2000 is much more preferable to me now.
If you aren't already, try setting MFP to 1lb or 0.5 lb a week loss and see if you find that easier to stick to.0 -
I have days like this also...I guess I assumed most people did. I don't have them all the time...but I do have my days.
What helped me was as another user stated, set *tiny* goals...but then *reward* yourself for those goals reached.
When I look at the overall goal, it makes me cringe and want to crawl into a cupboard with a piece of cheesecake! Aack!
...but if I place a goal on myself like 5 lbs. and 1 set of wall exercises....it's much less daunting of a task than to say "I need to lose a zillion pounds right this second!"
Are you treating yourself when you reach small goals? I do! I usually buy a book I've been wanting, or I'll buy Evian glass water bottles instead of the store brand, cheapy plastic ones...or I'll get myself a Netflix movie and veg out on on the couch. I cut a LOT of things out of my daily routine...things I *really* enjoyed (not just food)....and I'm using those things as my rewards.
(I guess my suggestion is to treat yourself for accomplished goals)0 -
YOU are the only one that can decide that. YOU have to want it. YOU have to put the work in. This is an inside job! We are but here to support you along the way.0
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MFP gives me 1380 calories and that is great, i do fine all day ,burn some calories then eat a whole loaf of bread for no reason, I am not even hungry.... I have lost weight and i am down from my original more than 50 pounds and i understand good nutrition i eat a varied healthy diet and then i just give up so easily I am 240 something pounds so i have alot of weight to lose and right now it seems an impossible task0
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It helped for me to set small goals. for example instead to saying I want to lose 100 lb, I set a goal for 5 or 10 lbs and then when I reached that goal I set a new one. I also set fitness goals for myself, like, 5 more minutes of cardio a day or upping my reps or weight.
If you are having a hard time sticking with your calorie goals, plan your meals and snacks out for the day. before you deter from your plan ask yourself of that's something you really want to do. When it comes down to it, no one can make you stick to this except yourself.0 -
What kind of foods do you eat? Do you hit your macros (dietary fat, protein, and fiber)? How much weight do you want to lose and what did you set your weekly weight loss goal to in MFP?0
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To make a lifestyle change you have to make it habit. Pick one thing and change it. For example, I drank a lot of sweet tea. I went from unsweet tea with Splenda, then I went from unsweet tea to water and lemon. I picked something (only one thing) and made a change. Other examples: instead of 1/2 hour of watching television, I got up and moved. Then I went to an hour zumba class. I used to eat bacon, eggs, pancakes with some type of bread too. I now drink a breakfast smoothie.
Pick something and change it to an improved habit.
I love the question/answer . . . how do you eat an elephant? answer: one bite at a time.0 -
I have tried the rewards system, i have tried measuring my success with fitness instead of the scale, i give myself fitness goals that are totally achievable even if its just walking 30 minutes a day etc, i have just lost that spark, that click moment.. that drive and desire and i want to know how to get it back!0
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thanks for that link !Your not going to drown if your reaching out for help we won't let you!
Maybe you are setting your goals to high? Are they what you really want? Have you ever heard of S.M.A.R.T goals? Google this! It really helps me to break down my goals so I know what I can achieve and realistically by when.
Don't be so hard on yourself. Look at how many times people have failed things before they went on to achieve great success
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anybody
wow you waited a whole minute for a reply ... you have WAY more patience than me :ohwell:0 -
I have tried the rewards system, i have tried measuring my success with fitness instead of the scale, i give myself fitness goals that are totally achievable even if its just walking 30 minutes a day etc, i have just lost that spark, that click moment.. that drive and desire and i want to know how to get it back!
Somethings I use is
bodymedia armband (tracks everything I do and the fact that its on my arm reminds me to get off my butt and do something)
I have a wall where I have all my exercises, goals, weight, and measurements (also reminds me what and why I'm doing this)
I have before pictures and progress pictures (shows me the result of sticking to it)0 -
You are looking outside yourself for something that should be found within.
Re-examine your motives for losing weight, maybe you don't really want to?0 -
You have to decide that you want it. You have to make a decision every day to stick to whatever changes you have made. It's not hard....you must keep it important every day.
In time you will start to see changes, you have to do it long enough to see them though.
Decide why you want it, maybe the reason you want it isn't the right reason yet.0 -
MFP gives me 1380 calories and that is great, i do fine all day ,burn some calories then eat a whole loaf of bread for no reason, I am not even hungry.... I have lost weight and i am down from my original more than 50 pounds and i understand good nutrition i eat a varied healthy diet and then i just give up so easily I am 240 something pounds so i have alot of weight to lose and right now it seems an impossible task
It sounds like you are emotionally eating which is a problem for many people. Maybe it would help to really sit down and reflect on your relationship with food, even get some therapy. It does sound like you have done some great work, take a moment and recognize that. It's okay to lose focus sometimes, it's okay to take a break from things while you compose yourself. I sometimes take a break from working out and just focus on eating right or whatever - just make a plan and get back on track. Don't beat yourself up for failing, just get back up.0 -
I know that I am the only one who can change me and what i do and how i progress etc but i feel im getting nowhere, I feel completely mentally stuck with the whole thing... I do want to lose, get healthy, get my life back on track and i have no patience ... I am just having "one of those days" but it has lasted for several weeks! aaaarrrrrhhhhhhh0
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"The chief cause of failure and unhappiness is trading what you want most for what you want now." - Zig Ziglar
What do you want most?
Congrats on 50 lbs lost!0 -
Are you depressed maybe? If so, cutting out refined sugar can be helpful. I appreciate what a good vitamin B12 liquid does for my energy and well-being. Best of luck to you. Each moment gives us choices to make and the opportunity to make a decision to move toward what we want or not. And the following moment, other choices to make. Life.....:flowerforyou:0
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Thanks for everyones support xxxxxxxxx
i think i am probably being too hard on myself and giving myself so much pressure then i fall apart when i make mistakes or it doesnt work out ...........0 -
I know that I am the only one who can change me and what i do and how i progress etc but i feel im getting nowhere, I feel completely mentally stuck with the whole thing... I do want to lose, get healthy, get my life back on track and i have no patience ... I am just having "one of those days" but it has lasted for several weeks! aaaarrrrrhhhhhhh
You said you already lost 50 lbs, that is getting somewhere!! Maybe just try sticking with the calorie goal for now and then add exercise later. That's what I did the first couple of weeks. At 240 pounds, 1380 calories is very low. Up your calories and see how things go. At 240 I was eating over 1700 calories a day and still losing. We all get in ruts! I was in one two weeks ago. I let myself be in a funk for a few days then I had to tell myself "Get it together!" And also remind myself how far I've come already and how much I've already accomplished. I have Zero patience too! Just focus on one thing at a time, everything else will fall into place.0 -
Thanks for everyones support xxxxxxxxx
i think i am probably being too hard on myself and giving myself so much pressure then i fall apart when i make mistakes or it doesnt work out ...........
Don't be too hard on yourself! And no pressure, life is hard enough. You will make mistakes, everyone does. You will make it work out. Every day is a new day. Think marathon, not sprint.0 -
Might be something deeper going on than just wanting to lose weight and get your bod back on track.
I had to learn to love myself and accept myself "as is"....even with all the fat everywhere...before I could love myself enough to do something about it.
I'm not saying that's your problem, I'm just saying that when I've tried diet and exercise before...I've always failed before I even reached a 10 lb weight loss. In a nutshell, I simply didn't care enough about ME to save myself. I'm down 49 lbs now...and I think going through my life and pinpointing problem areas with regard to my weight gain....really helped; it wasn't as simple as I thought.
Every single thing that attributed to my weight gain was a lightbulb that glared painfully in my face....and lemme tell ya, it's a lot more fun shattering those lightbulbs than it is to allow them to stay there. Some of them are still there, but at least their glow is dim now instead of glaring. :P0 -
I have a suggestion. Read the book "Excuse me, your life is waiting" by Lynn Grabhorn; it might help. Hang in there.0
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