I work out with my boyfriend

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Replies

  • ValGogo
    ValGogo Posts: 2,168 Member
    I can't life with a BF- that's to much for me- glad it works for you but don't be afraid to do your own thing.

    Lol, yeah. I tried with my wife, but i have little patience in the weight room for shenanigans. So whenever I hear, that's weird, i don't want to do that. (srsly, it's a deadlift.) I respond with "ok, I'll be done in about a half hour. Love you."

    Then I get back to my work. Ain't nobody got time for that.

    Word! Good for you, brother!
  • levitateme
    levitateme Posts: 999 Member
    My boyfriend is my lifting partner. I'm just realizing now (from reading others mentioning that they can't work out with their partner) how cool it is that we are on the same page when it comes to the gym. He benches a lot more than I do, but we swap out plates in between sets and spot each other. It's a pretty even playing field for us when it comes to squats and DL, and he prefers to OHPing dumbbells to my barbell, but we can each do our own thing together and we push each other to work harder.

    OP, you either need to not go to the gym with him, go to the gym with him but do your own thing (like, "we just come in the same car") or get on the same page. I recommend lifting. It's fun and not "manly" or whatever insulting thing you said about me and other women like me. :flowerforyou:
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    OP, I see that you are 19 years old, so I'll go easy on you. Either start lifting weights to make your time in the weight room useful, or go do something else in another part of the gym that you like. Trust me, your boyfriend doesn't need you there. He can get someone else to spot him.
  • AllOutof_Bubblegum
    AllOutof_Bubblegum Posts: 3,646 Member
    Get over your fear of heavy weights. Lift with him.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    Hm, yeah, if you have a partner that can match your intensity and pattern, then good! IF not... less than optimal.

    I love my wife and all, but it just isn't happening, we're far too different in goals, and interests. I've offered a couple tri folks to join me, but I have a feeling that won't work out either.

    There you go, call it alone time! :)
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    I can't life with a BF- that's to much for me- glad it works for you but don't be afraid to do your own thing.

    Lol, yeah. I tried with my wife, but i have little patience in the weight room for shenanigans. So whenever I hear, that's weird, i don't want to do that. (srsly, it's a deadlift.) I respond with "ok, I'll be done in about a half hour. Love you."

    Then I get back to my work. Ain't nobody got time for that.

    Word! Good for you, brother!

    Tell you what though, super frustrated when she beats me into the ground running.

    run a 5km, and she literally runs rings around me from time to time. >_<
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    I'd like to add I lifted quiet a bit with my best friend- but we trained completely differently- so we would drive to the gym together- spot each other for lifts that needed spotting- and touch base every 30 min or so to make sure we were on the same time table roughly... but we never actually LIFTED together.

    totally fine- totally do-able.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    Cut out the spotting and that's what my wife and I do. So we're technically together, in the same building... lol.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    Cut out the spotting and that's what my wife and I do. So we're technically together, in the same building... lol.

    Exactly.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    Hm, yeah, if you have a partner that can match your intensity and pattern, then good! IF not... less than optimal.

    I love my wife and all, but it just isn't happening, we're far too different in goals, and interests. I've offered a couple tri folks to join me, but I have a feeling that won't work out either.

    There you go, call it alone time! :)

    Everything you said + 1,000,000

    My alone time/gym buddies time is so important to me. Also, I like to go at my own pace and I don't really like to talk when I'm working.

    OP - Find some things you like to do and go do them. There's no need to follow your BF around the gym, sacrificing your own workout for the sake of watching him. Also, lifting weights is not "manly" - it's an awesome way to build muscle, cut inches and feel great.
  • jmt08c
    jmt08c Posts: 343 Member
    Another relationship thread? Just break up.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    Another relationship thread? Just break up.

    but I can't quit you.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    :laugh: If you stay together you will end up hating each other anyway. You won't continue to work out together.

    The world is a twisted place, kid.

    42557.gif
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    I'm sorry, are you his shadow or something? Why you so attached? Do what you want. Unless you don't know what you want, in which case keep doing whatever he does. Seems like that's working out for you.

    love-toilet.jpg
    u jelly?
  • KatJ_NZ
    KatJ_NZ Posts: 31 Member
    Honestly? If you can't lift the "manly" weights you are no use to him as a spotter anyway. Find a way to make those 40 minutes useful *to you*.

    The other posters have some great suggestions. My two cents worth is that you should talk to a trainer at your gym, and ask them to write you up a couple of workouts that you can fit into 40 minutes. I go to the gym with my husband, and we go our separate ways then meet up again at the exit - then we're both happiest and healthiest! :flowerforyou:
  • amessam8
    amessam8 Posts: 58 Member
    Honestly? If you can't lift the "manly" weights you are no use to him as a spotter anyway. Find a way to make those 40 minutes useful *to you*.

    This.

    Also, are there financial or logistical (only one car) reasons why you must go to the gym together? There is a book called "New Rules for Lifting for Women" that (I've heard) has great advice for lifting. Maybe you should check it out from your local library and follow it so that your time at the gym can be more productive.
  • Hachiko89
    Hachiko89 Posts: 43 Member
    Use the time that you're helping him to recover, and then once he leaves to go to work, stay at the gym and carry on your workout. Then you can spend longer at the gym!
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    Use the time that you're helping him to recover, and then once he leaves to go to work, stay at the gym and carry on your workout. Then you can spend longer at the gym!

    That doesn't sound very efficient. She doesn't need 20 minutes or so to recover from 15 minutes on the treadmill. And why would he get to go first? Is his time more valuable.

    OP needs to find her own routine and go do it.

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