Anyone over 30 with no kids and not married
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@angelakearn10 Ha, made me laugh out loud!
me2 lol0 -
I'm 30, I'm not (or have never been) married, nor do I have kids. I do however want to marry someone and have loads of kids (kids are awesome!), just not yet. In time it will happen
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I'm 30, I'm not (or have never been) married, nor do I have kids. I do however want to marry someone and have loads of kids (kids are awesome!), just not yet. In time it will happen
Sometimes, I totally wish I was a dude.0 -
28, been married a year, and no kids (of my own) - I have a 12-year-old stepdaughter - and really undecided about whether or not I want to have children of my own.
Could someone please explain why anyone would think that someone who doesn't want to have children is selfish? I don't understand.0 -
Because someone dares think in a way that doesn't correspond to one's own way of thinking. I'd say it's a narrow world view when everyone needs to conform, but some people seem quite comfortable sitting on their high horses whilst passing judgment on others. It's almost like they've perfected it to an art form already.Could someone please explain why anyone would think that someone who doesn't want to have children is selfish? I don't understand.0 -
At 29, I had a boyfriend, but he lived in Manhattan. I traveled Friday and Monday at least twice a month, and I went out 5 nights a week, sometimes more. I didn't know very many people at all who had kids then. Even the married people didn't have kids. The only person my age who had kids was my sister, and everyone always wondered why she had them so young.
Why rush things? Kids can wait until you're in your mid-30s.
I hope so.
That's why I'm trying to be healthy.
It's very abnormal where I live (in the south, not New York at all! Oklahoma!), but I hear more and more about people having children later in life, and fertility treatments, etc.. etc.. so I'm hopeful that's it's not too late, after all.
I'll be 32 next month, so the clock is ticking, faster than it was ticking before, it seems.
I was 37 with my second. 33 with my first. I live in the South as well, and I'm seeing peers waiting longer. The BF lived in NYC. I just visited there 4 days a week.0 -
I'm 30, no kids, not married. I hate that people think people who don't want kids are selfish. My boyfriend's ex wanted kids so bad, that was her friggen life goal or something. He didn't really want them but she basically bullied him into wanting them. Luckily they didn't have any together so I don't have to put up with her now. But seriously I think pushing someone who doesn't want kids is way more selfish than not wanting to have them at all. Plus, my kids would be @$$holes, I'm just saving the world from dealing with them. You're welcome.0
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29, unmarried, no plans on having kids or being married. It's just me tho', to each their own... XD
I've been wanting to travel the world for quite some time. I know most do it in their 20's and get it out of their system, but this is something I want to do for life. I can see myself spending a good decade or two outside of the US. I've found folks online of similar age who are currently living the life I want to live.
Hopefully, next year I'll be out of the US! I want to live in Japan, South Korea, China, France, Germany, Spain, Italy, etc. There are also many states that I want to experience living in, as well.0 -
I've been wanting to travel the world for quite some time. I know most do it in their 20's and get it out of their system, but this is something I want to do for life. I can see myself spending a good decade or two outside of the US. I've found folks online of similar age who are currently living the life I want to live.
Hopefully, next year I'll be out of the US! I want to live in Japan, South Korea, China, France, Germany, Spain, Italy, etc. There are also many states that I want to experience living in, as well.
I would love to be able to travel for life, maybe have a job that requires that of me. I've always disliked staying in one place, gotta see everything I can while I can I stayed a month in Okinawa and in Tokyo. Next up is Ireland! I've also seen a bunch of the East coast cuz I go around spending the night in haunted places as a hobby 0 -
Wow,i am glad I made this thread because amazed with all these response.I thought I was the only one since almost everyone I know has already kids .even my sister who is younger than me has already have 2 kids .So I would always feel akward when people asked if if I have kids since most girls where I live already have children at my age0
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I'm 35, widowed and no kids. I did want kids when I was in my early 20's and just married, but it didn't work out that way. After that ended and I started thinking about moving on I decided I didn't want kids. My parents are the only ones that have put pressure on me to have kids. I have been called selfish quite a bit though.
Selfish is knowing you don't want to deal with kids and then you have them anyway to get a freaking welfare check. You are not selfish. You're smart. Keep in mind some people who do want kids shouldn't have them.
I'm over 40 by far and do have kids. One is a daughter who is almost 30. She has a live in boyfriend and they don't want kids - probably not ever. (which is why I was reading this thread) Your mother should want you to be happy, IMO, and if no kids and no marriage makes you happy, don't have kids. That's what I tell my daughter when she asks if I think she should get married or have kids (usually after she gets off the phone with her grandmother - or as I sometimes say, the guiltmother).0 -
I've been wanting to travel the world for quite some time. I know most do it in their 20's and get it out of their system, but this is something I want to do for life. I can see myself spending a good decade or two outside of the US. I've found folks online of similar age who are currently living the life I want to live.
Hopefully, next year I'll be out of the US! I want to live in Japan, South Korea, China, France, Germany, Spain, Italy, etc. There are also many states that I want to experience living in, as well.
I LOVE to travel, and since I don't have children, I travel frequently. Last year I spent about a month in California and 3 weeks in Okinawa. This year I've been concentrating on a new career, so have only been to CA for about a week thus far. Since I began traveling in college, I've been to about 35 states, England and Japan. Looking to do more international travel once the new career stabilizes (I'm a freelance writer, which means I can work from anywhere!).
Oh, and yes, my older brother and sister-in-law have 10 children. The oldest is 15 1/2; the youngest is almost 4 months. As you might imagine, they get the opposite comments that I receive!0 -
I'm 27 and my bestie has 4 kids. Cousin's who are my age are all married. Even the younger ones are in process of getting married. It is a little awkward when they start talking about their kids but otherwise, meh! I love all my nieces and nephews. I do want kids someday. I do hear "what are you waiting for? or more like when?" ALOT! I just laugh at it and say something along the line "I'm saving the unfortunate guy's life by not marrying him (whoever it is). Just ask my dad"
hahaha.
I guess it will happen, when it happens. I don't think I'm ready to settle down justttt yet!0 -
I just turned 36 and have no husband and no kids. I am in a serious relationship with a guy so I think we will end up married but who knows. And I think I might just want like a child one day, but who knows. If I could have a child tomorrow I would say no thank you. Not sure if I want kids because I am getting older and that's what I am supposed to do or what lol. I have three dogs and they are like my kids.
Would love to meet some like minded girls in my area. Alexandria va. Girls that are normal and want to hang out and not *kitten* it out at the bars every night. Most of my female friends are married with kids0 -
Wow,i am glad I made this thread because amazed with all these response.I thought I was the only one since almost everyone I know has already kids .even my sister who is younger than me has already have 2 kids .So I would always feel akward when people asked if if I have kids since most girls where I live already have children at my age
Don't worry about it!
I'm 31, married with no kids, still trying to fix up an inherited falling-down farmhouse with my hubs and work two jobs (both of us) to maybe have room for one child someday.
If we get too old to pop one out, then decide that we want one, we'll just adopt. I used to stay awake at night worrying about it but now not so much.0 -
I'm 44 with no kids and not married0
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Believe it or not......I have had to deal with people asking me why I only have ONE child!......I would not pay much attention to those folks......it will happen when you are ready and if you want it to happen....having children does not define you as a person in my opinion.0
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I am 35, not married but living with my boyfriend (for over 2 years) not really sure if we want kids.0
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i wasnt 37 till i had my kid and still not married0
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I just turned 34 a couple months ago. No kids and no marriages. I am not afraid of snakes, spiders, the usual fears. I fear marriage. If it's meant to happen, it'll find a way but I'm good as I am. I have a boyfriend who knew my feelings about marriage from the beginning. He's been talking about it lately but I still stand firm on no marriage for me. Our work hours are pretty much opposite but we'll have to sit down and talk soon.
I love kids but don't want any if I'm not married, and since I don't see myself getting married, you can figure out the kids thing. ;0)0 -
WE make our choices... sometimes they are thrust upon us... in the end what does it matter.. so long as someone we leave behind has something nice to say0
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Just turned 30 in June. No kids, not married (although I was engaged at one point). Do want to get married and have kids but not in a rush. Don't really feel any pressure other than that most of my friends are married and starting to have kids0
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37, no kids, never married, no current commitments and have no issues at all about it.0
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Is anyone who is over 30 and not married and have no kids yet? I am 29 and I don't have either of those but when people ask thry always say "what are you waiting for"? I just feel like when its meant to happen it will happen and I don't really care about it.
So is it socially akward to be a certain age and not have children?
After perusing other replies to this discussion, my mother, brother & some friends are quite the opposite. In passing conversation, they'll act shocked when I declare that being as old as I am, I might have to take matters into my own hands and just have a baby myself, whether I'm married or not. They all chime, "What's the rush? You're young." <~ This statement from many who are younger than I am, married with a minimum of 2 children.
I find, if I was to make an issue or take offense@their statements, I'm making it awkward for me and them. At least this has been the case with friends and associates who'd moved casual conversation in this direction. People rarely ever have filters up, to be sensitive to those around them, when it comes to ones age, marriage and children issue.
My brother tends to list all our relatives, friends and associates who'd married right out of high school or university and have since divorced more than 4 times, with a minimum of 3 children per marriage. "The alimony and child support payments are lifestyle killers ... Remember that sis, whenever you think you should have done it. Why rush into it, just to marry the wrong guy?" <~ my brother's words. I tend to keep my opinions to myself, being that I prefer to view each situation from 3 angles > Him vs Her Vs Eye of God.
My mother on the other hand is selfish. If I ever got married and had children, she'd lose her "yes mum, whatever you say mum" daughter. She'll be deprioritised. And at other times [on the rarest of occasions] she'd like to bug me about her grand babies, with no emphasis on the hubby/daddy. Her line to me on those moments, "I know you're busy my gal, but could you timetable a grandchild for your mum?" ROFL. I believe my mother's friends are the ones who've decided to take issue with my marital/baby status more than my mother, to be honest.
ETA: I'm 37 years, never married and no children.0 -
I'll be 30 in a couple months, never married & no kids. I would like to get married one day, I'm on the fence about kids.
I do feel pressured, but it could be self-created. I get the "why are you still single?" question a lot, and it bothers me. First of all, I can't just DECIDE to be in a relationship, there has to be a second person involved. Secondly, asking that makes it sound like there's something wrong with me. I've dated, but I can't force romantic feelings. I've had a couple serious relationships, but they didn't work out. Sure I could've stayed in one of those relationships, but I would've been miserable. I'm not willing to be in a relationship JUST to be in a relationship, so I will stay single for the time being.
I do feel socially awkward sometimes, a lot of people in my life and on Facebook are getting married, having kids and so on, and I'm like "I'm starting the third season of Supernatural..."
When I was in school, I had it set in my mind that I'd be married by 23ish, and have my first kid around 25. Now I'm nearing 30 and I still can't even imagine myself having kids. I'm nowhere near mature enough! :laugh: For now I'm willing to let things happen when they'll happen.
ETA: When I'm feeling blue about being single & childless, I remind myself of all the freedoms I have - my money is all mine, I don't have to worry about including someone else in plans and I can sleep through the night lol0 -
I am 33, not married, no children. I would love to be a wife and mother, but I am starting to accept that it may not be in the cards for me. Sometimes, I am okay with that thought. Other times, it hurts. A lot.
I was in a relationship with a guy for 12 years before he blew it up in an epic, Jerry Springer-like fashion. That was 4 years ago. I thought we were closer to getting married and starting a family than we had ever been. Apparently I didn't know he was not on the same page. I haven't so much as had a single date since then (not from lacking of trying to meet people!), so it's hard not to feel like the opportunity may have passed me by.
My family and friends know better than to make comments about it - so I don't have to deal with comments or pressure from people.0 -
I'm 30 and engaged, no kids. We've been engaged for a year and a half and I get the "so when are you finally getting married?" A LOT. I'm just like you try finishing a PhD, teaching, and taking care of the house and tell me if you feel like wedding planning too! The what are you waiting for is soooo annoying. Like how about a little praise for not getting pregnant before my life is in order!?0
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Almost 34, married almost 14 years, NO desire to have kids. There will always be pressure, both obvious and implied, so it's not always an easy choice to make or position to be in. My friends know how much I dislike children and know not to push the issue. Breeding (and pairing off, for that matter) is not for everybody and people who are happy without kids (or with being single) should be allowed to be happy with the life they've chosen.0
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I'm 30 and engaged, no kids. We've been engaged for a year and a half and I get the "so when are you finally getting married?" A LOT. I'm just like you try finishing a PhD, teaching, and taking care of the house and tell me if you feel like wedding planning too! The what are you waiting for is soooo annoying. Like how about a little praise for not getting pregnant before my life is in order!?
Consider yourself thoroughly praised!! :drinker: You have a solid plan and I, for one, commend it. :flowerforyou:0 -
I'm 36 and have 3 children, but I didn't get married until I was 30 and had my first child at 31. I didn't feel any pressure to have children at all, that's just what we wanted.
I've got friends my age who aren't married and don't have kids. Nothing selfish about that. To each their own!0
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