Can't Imagine Myself Skinny

sapphire1166

As a kid, I was super skinny. Until I hit a very early puberty and blew up in both height and girth. I was very active as teen and very toned and muscular, but was never under 180 lbs at 5' 7". In college I ate horrible and have weighed at least 215 lbs for all of my adult life (I'm 32).

When I see success stories on the message boards, I find it insanely difficult to imagine myself ever being "skinny". To barely slip into the "healthy" BMI range I need to weigh 155 lbs. I don't think I've weighed that since I was 13.

I keep thinking of this imaginary girl who's not actually me being the "skinny" person I'll become if I continue on this journey and I'm afraid I'll be disappointed that I'm not living up to my fantasy and get discouraged, if that makes any sense at all.

jrline

Stay positive and work towards your goal.

I'm in the best shape of my life at 40

dopeysmelly

Do you need to visualize yourself as looking "skinny"? This is a weird concept to me personally (I don't visualize myself as anything really), although I think I understand where you're coming from.

The only thing necessary for success is maintaining a caloric deficit. You'll probably end up hotter than you could ever visualize in any case!!

DopeItUp

Why worry about what might or might not be? Why not just worry about the next month, or the next 5lbs? See where the journey takes you, not obsess about the finish line (which will probably change as you lose weight and near your goal anyway).

Jennisin1

I'm 163lbs, size 8 at 5'10 and I never never ever was this thin. I was a 165lbs size 12 at 13 years old........ it has taken a lot to get use to this new me...

dfranch

I know how you feel, while I don't know I would call myself skinny, I am 20 lbs lighter than at any point in my adult life, so it is possible. That said it takes a long time. We're conditioned to expect instant gratification, and that just doesn't happen.

sarah_hite

I know exactly how you feel. I too have been overweight since I was a teenager, and I have a hard time imagining myself as being skinny. But to some extent, that actually encourages me to continue working at it because I'm curious to see how I will look. It also helps to look at some of the success stories on here and see people who have achieved their goals. You can do it too!

jquijas

When I see success stories on the message boards, I find it insanely difficult to imagine myself ever being "skinny". To barely slip into the "healthy" BMI range I need to weigh 155 lbs. I don't think I've weighed that since I was 13.

Take it one step at a time. To say that you need to weigh 155 is a guess. With proper nutrition and exercise you could be a healthy BMI at 140, 150, or even 170! The scale is just a number that takes absolutely nothing into account other than the amount of weight placed upon it. Work on being a happy, healthy you and the scale won't matter!

Tingababoo

Do you live with someone? It is a LOT easier to do this with someone at home, or better yet- someone at work! Work is where you have Breakfast and Lunch, that's 2 out of 3 major meals! Luckily, I have someone both at home and work who are on MFP and invested to make their goal. We keep each other in check. You also need to find what works for you. Some people need to work out while others just need to watch what they eat. Both worked for me so I did both and my weight dropped quickly. I set realistic goals for myself. I wanted to lose 25 lbs but i set it at 5 lbs instead and each time I reached my goal, it would push me to continue on.

Good Luck! I know you'll be able to reach your goal one day, how fast just depends on how badly you want it

SheGlows

I know exactly how you feel.

I've never had a tiny figure, and now that I'm doing contest prep, it's really weird to imagine myself up on stage in a teensy bikini as one of the super lean competitors.

I'm fairly certain that my expectations of this "fantasy bikini competitor" will be much different than the reality. We just have to know and make sure that we recognize that our bodies are not like anyone else's. The expectation will *always* be different than reality, because we've yet to see what the unique, original reality actually looks like. How can we accurately predict something we've never seen before?

And that's just what your "skinny self" will be: Unique and original, and not like anyone else's "skinny self." Is that such a bad thing? I'd much rather have that than a carbon copy of someone else's body.. Except maybe Amanda Latona. Her body is like.. Mmph.

ExRelaySprinter

What's your definition of "Skinny" though?
Mine is someone looking very bony with hardly any body fat! (i.e most Catwalk/Runway Models).
Not my idea of a great physique. :ohwell:
Looking fit and healthy, now that's different!
Just concentrate on losing the weight slowly, add in some exercise and take it from there.
I think you'll know when you've lost enough.

FatNFightingIt

Makes perfect sense. I was "built" in middle school and early high school and then went up from there. I have never been a healthy weight as an adult. Until the last year I have been well over 200 with a high at 297 lbs at 5'3". Crazy. I have lost about 110 lbs over the last 3 years and still see myself as the big girl. I still have another 30-40 lbs to go and I am wondering the same thing. It's a weird mental thing that we can use as an excuse or we use it as a motivator to do the best we can. I have already readjusted my goal weight because I don't want to be skinny. I want to be healthy and strong. I think it will take time to accept the new you just like anything. You're not alone if that helps.

shaynepoole

I never imagined myself as "skinny". My goal was to get healthy and out of the plus sizes

Even now, as a size 4 and 145 lbs, just in the normal BMI range - I don't see myself as skinny - I just see myself as the healthiest I have been my adult life

I would not worry about getting skinny - that is all a matter of perception anyway.

headofphat

Don't even visualize it, just know it's coming.
It's awesome when you grab something off the rack at the store that you just know isn't going to fit then you get in the fitting room and you'll get the biggest smile on your face.
good luck.

HisStrengthCounselor

Hey, your own body image is your own, you don't have to feel pressured to be 'skinny'. I have never been skinny either, and I don't ever want to be 'skinny', I have always been more muscular in the thighs/butt. I love my curves (and so does my hubby), I want to lose the extra fat that I have gained from being sedentary and eating horrible, and for me that is getting down to 150, I am 5'3, and naturally 'thick'. bmi says I should be 113, that's ridiculous. When I was 150, had no stomach, just nice butt/thick thighs, my blood presure was normal, my labs cholestrol/sugar ect were all normal. Even now at 197 people don't believe I weigh that much because of my plummpy hourglass figure. Please understand that bmi is actually not that great a measurement of your health, just using height and weight doesn't account for other things like muscle/stomach fat...Like others have said, set realistic long term goals and short term goals, figure out what YOUR goal weight is, not based on how you were in high school or inadequate bmi scales; How you feel in your body, how you want your clothes to fit, what you need to be healthy inside. This site is great for lots of advise, please understand everyone is different, what works for some, doesn't work for others, there is no 'magic' way, you have to find what works for you. :flowerforyou:

dlazyday

IMO you should set your goal for healthy not "skinny." In order to do that you need to listen to your body and how it feels. Take your measurements. Muscle weighs more than fat but takes up a lot less space, so you may never reach the skinny number on the scale but you can certainly reach a healthy number. Best of luck, you can do this!

Timorous_Beastie

Think "healthy," "fit," "strong," "able," not "skinny." Even take it a few steps back, and aim for healthier, fitter, stronger, more able. For me, little things like less body aches, not getting out of breath carrying loads of laundry upstairs, more energy, being able to easily pick up and buy the 50 pound back of rock salt instead of buying it 10 pounds at a time.... all that matters more than a number on a scale or the tag on my jeans.

Archerychickge

I wouldnt try to visualize myself "skinny", I would however try to visualize myself healthy and fit. There is a HUGE difference and one that is easier to imagine. It all begins with changing your thought processes about food, exercise, and what you want out of life.

This isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle change. You can do this, but it takes committment and dedication.

Skinny is just a word, healthy is a lifestyle.

mom2my4boys

I get where your coming from. My goal weight is 150lbs. I started at 275lbs. Currently 180lbs. I have no idea what i'll look like. But like everyone else already mentioned, try focusing on healthy and fit. Eventually you'll get there and one day realize "oh, this is me at my goal weight." Good luck and have fun!

arwFTW

I have the opposite problem. I only imagine myself as skinny (and i'm totally not) so every time i see a picture of myself and i'm not that skinny version, i get mad.
I'm trying not to focus on my idea of it and just go with the proof: numbers on the scale/measuring tape, and how far and fast I can run every week.

alligatorrawr

As a kid, I was super skinny. Until I hit a very early puberty and blew up in both height and girth. I was very active as teen and very toned and muscular, but was never under 180 lbs at 5' 7". In college I ate horrible and have weighed at least 215 lbs for all of my adult life (I'm 32).

When I see success stories on the message boards, I find it insanely difficult to imagine myself ever being "skinny". To barely slip into the "healthy" BMI range I need to weigh 155 lbs. I don't think I've weighed that since I was 13.

I keep thinking of this imaginary girl who's not actually me being the "skinny" person I'll become if I continue on this journey and I'm afraid I'll be disappointed that I'm not living up to my fantasy and get discouraged, if that makes any sense at all.

I haven't been in the 150 range since 5th grade! that's why I want to get there so bad hahahaha. My first goal is to get under 200 pounds, then to a healthy body fat (NOT BMI!!! I have muscle and I am proud of it!) and go from there you got this!

KameHameHaaaa

I totally feel ya there. I've never been skinny, not even as a younger child. I was very overweight by 7 and obese by 10. The only idea of a "skinny" me I can think of is when I was a teen in martial arts. I was still probably 230 LBs, but that is the closest I can even imagine to being small simply because I was active and had high endurance due to the martial arts training.

Personally I can't wait for the day I wake up, look in the mirror and don't recognize myself. I wanna know what it feels like to feel lighter :] It'll be a feeling I've -never- felt before, so wondering if maybe I'll even notice when it happens.

Kalikel

I totally get it. As I get closer to a Normal BMI, I wonder more what I'll look like when I'm done. Sometimes I push my fat out of the way to see how an area might look.

It's interesting to watch the changes, which I didn't start noticing until I'd lost 55-60 pounds. Seeing bones poking through...and feeling them. They were buried under fat for SO LONG. It almost seems wrong to see my tibia (shinbone) poking out by knee and to feel the bones in my arm.

It's like an adventure. It really is. Some of it seems odd and strange...takes getting used to!...but it's all good.

I can't wait to see the finished product.

chadya07

its hard to imagine but as you get toward there and see your body change it gets easier to imagine. my timeline is similar to yours and i still cant wrap myself around the concept that someday i wont be overweight and that i wont have all the stigma to deal with around that... its like... a part of my identity will be totally changed. luckily its such a gradual process that you get time to adjust. its hit or miss now, what i see when i look in the mirror, the fat or the future... but i see the future more now. and sometimes i am shocked when i glimpse myself in a mirror and get weirded out like i am looking at someone else...

looking forward to that day when it will seem like just a thing and not a weird thing.

ponycyndi

I think we are twins. Seriously, you just told my story, literally word for word. Our stats are the same.

Add in the fact that I've got T1 diabetes and I've had 3 c sections. If I can do it, so can you! I believe in you.

Christineclendaniel

I understand this logic...I think even if I get skinny I wont feel skinny. People at work call me "skinny" now and I laugh every time

VeggieKidMandy

I am 6ft tall and have never been under 180. I played Football on the guys football team all throughout Highschool and continued being active up until I got married, then I gained 130 lbs. I have Lost 100 of those pounds total and am now working to get to 170 lbs for the coast guard. I understand how you feel about being anxious getting back down to that smaller weight, but as some of the previous posters have mentioned, dont focus on the finish line, focus on the journey, and when you finally do reach the finish line the victory will be sweet.

lewispwest

A bit late to the party here but there was someone on here who had lost a hell of a lot of weight and went from being an obese shut-in to a really good looking guy and I looked at him thinking I could never achieve what he did. I kept at it and I think I'm doing pretty well to emulate it so it is indeed possible, even if you can't picture it now!

silentKayak

I'm the same way. The last time I lost a lot of weight I took these "skinny" pants into the changing room. There was no way they were going to fit, even though the size label said they would. And of course, they fit, and they looked freaking fantastic, and my thighs looked like they belonged to someone else. I actually burst into tears.

And that was at a higher weight than I want and expect to be a year from today.

I think we can sabotage ourselves with these thoughts, like somehow we don't deserve to be thin or "that body's not for me".

That thin body you can barely imagine ... It is for you. It will be you. And once you earn it, you're going to keep it there, because that's the real you.

jharlowlives

I feel the same, I am actually scared to lose weight. I'm afraid I'll be ugly.

crystallynnl

I can't think of myself skinny either. I know I would feel better about myself but I have to get there. I am 22 years old and I don't want to be overweight forever. I haven't been "slim" since I was like 10 probably..