Strong reaction to public humiliation = Over sensitive

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Replies

  • jnord8729
    jnord8729 Posts: 234 Member
    Oh give the guy a break! He's just using the personality the marines gave him
  • silentKayak
    silentKayak Posts: 658 Member
    What a jerk.
  • Lesleycali
    Lesleycali Posts: 236 Member
    That was such a kick a** response! I can never think like that on my feet, I would have mumbled and walked away and then gotten mad at myself later for not speaking up. good for you- what a strength that is to stand up for yourself.

    And he WAS being rude. Why should a stranger ever suggest such a thing? Sure, if he said the caramel is my favorite or something along those lies it would be ok. But he was saying that the OP should be eating diet food. Total jerk move.
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member

    My first thought. I guess we're in the minority.

    Perhaps not, but if you are learning to be more confident in yourself and your own decisions, then it's a pretty big step to be able to rationally tell someone how you feel. Would I have said anything? Probably not, but if this was something I had faced in the past, as the OP stated she did, then good on her for having the courage to speak up.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Came back to this thread after it occured to me that perhaps the guy was actually trying to flirt and has like no skills in this area. I see others had the same idea as well. Just to note the last time I got picked up in a grocery aisle it was by a fireman (#humblebrag) and he had the good sense to look at the haircutting magazine I was looking at and say to me, "If you're thinking of cutting your hair, DON'T, it looks REAL nice the way it is". On a rainy day. When I had fruzzy hair. That's hair so frizzy it's fuzzy. I was also dressed like a hefty bag in sweats due to the rain but as he explained later. (on our date) "Girl I have x-ray vision for sweats and puffy jackets I knew all what was under there. And plus your hair can never look bad no matter what you may think."

    #thatsflirting
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member

    Perhaps not, but if you are learning to be more confident in yourself and your own decisions, then it's a pretty big step to be able to rationally tell someone how you feel. Would I have said anything? Probably not, but if this was something I had faced in the past, as the OP stated she did, then good on her for having the courage to speak up.

    This is a good point. Today I would scoff at such a remark and give him a quick "what a douche" look and turn away. There was a time when I was learning to speak up for myself and this would have been an enormous victory for me to say my piece in a rational way with no devolving into stammering, tears, or the like.
  • KameHameHaaaa
    KameHameHaaaa Posts: 837 Member

    What kind did you get? Please tell me it's something GOOD :heart:

    ETA: I kind of want chocolate now....

    Ghirardelli sea salt soiree (dark chocolate with sea salt and roasted almonds) :]
  • ivygirl1937
    ivygirl1937 Posts: 899 Member
    Yay, good for you!! :flowerforyou:

    I blush/get embarrassed REALLY easily also so I know the feeling, I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself!

    And I'm going to memorize your response should that ever happen to me. :happy: Hopefully not, though. I'm 5'10" and built like a linebacker, most people won't approach me even though I'm actually really timid. :laugh:
  • WillLift4Tats
    WillLift4Tats Posts: 1,699 Member

    This is a good point. Today I would scoff at such a remark and give him a quick "what a douche" look and turn away. There was a time when I was learning to speak up for myself and this would have been an enormous victory for me to say my piece in a rational way with no devolving into stammering, tears, or the like.

    Exactly my thoughts. Good for OP for speaking up for herself. All in all, I think the comment was meant to be helpful, but I wouldn't exactly be thanking the heavens for this dude's comment.

    Also, marines can be blunt, to the point, and dgaf. So it may have been meant to be helpful, but his delivery...not so hot. Especially after your unexpected comeback lol.
  • KameHameHaaaa
    KameHameHaaaa Posts: 837 Member

    This is a good point. Today I would scoff at such a remark and give him a quick "what a douche" look and turn away. There was a time when I was learning to speak up for myself and this would have been an enormous victory for me to say my piece in a rational way with no devolving into stammering, tears, or the like.

    That's exactly what I mean/how I feel. The fact is I've been obese my entire life. MY ENTIRE LIFE. I've had almost 30 years of just staying quiet, going home and crying alone in my room. Lately I've felt like I should speak up. Maybe not as harshly as I did this morning. Who knows, if I wasn't on my period maybe the conversation would've become a little more lighthearted LOL. But I've spent enough time in my life silent, or half-heartedly nodding in agreement because of how often I was bullied when I was younger. I've only recently started thinking for myself and loving myself.
  • Original_Sinner
    Original_Sinner Posts: 180 Member
    Agree, he was rude!

    But, was it possible that this was his very stupid, awkward, rude, silly attempt to strike up a conversation and possilby flirt with you?

    No matter the reason, it was very rude of him.

    regardless of whether it could be that,

    he hurt her feelings. As someone who often puts my foot in my mouth I would rather be with someone that understands that then doesn't.

    IF that is what he did, she didn't get it......and their whole relationship that you have imagined as a possibility here would be filled with moments like this.

    Just let it be about the fact that the man said something that hurt her. And she responded angrily....

    I've had people make comments about what I put in my grocery cart, I usually just flash them a smile and say "thanks but I got this." and walk away.

    I sincerely hope that your defending your choices made you feel better and less defensive. You don't have to explain anything to a stranger. EVER.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,219 Member
    Oh give the guy a break! He's just using the personality the marines gave him

    Thank you for classifying all Marines as rude. How about we turn it around and say he's just using the personality that his male chromosomes gave him? You would call it sexist and say not all men are rude. Making blanket statements like that makes you look ignorant.

    Sincerely,
    A United States Marine
  • chocolate is actually really good for you, dark chocolate is best. but as a medical student I will tell you right now that it helps with your hormones by putting endorphins in your brain that make you feel better/happy. not to mention womens health did an article on why you SHOULD eat chocolate, here is a few quotes:
    "In a 9-year Swedish study of more than 31,000 women, those who ate one or two servings of dark chocolate each week cut their risk for heart failure by as much as a third. "
    "Researchers from the University of Copenhagen found that dark chocolate is far more filling, offering more of a feeling of satiety than its lighter-colored sibling. That is, dark chocolate lessens cravings for sweet, salty, and fatty foods."
    "Women who ate chocolate daily during their pregnancy reported that they were better able to handle stress than mothers-to-be who abstained. Also, a Finnish study found their babies were happier and smiled more"
    ". In a small Italian study, participants who ate a candy bar's worth of dark chocolate once a day for 15 days saw their potential for insulin resistance drop by nearly half. "Flavonoids increase nitric oxide production," says lead researcher Claudio Ferri, M.D., a professor at the University of L'Aquila in Italy. "And that helps control insulin sensitivity." "
    "Swiss scientists (who else?) found that when very anxious people ate an ounce and a half of dark chocolate every day for two weeks, their stress hormone levels were significantly reduced and the metabolic effects of stress were partially mitigated."
    "London researchers recently tested chocolate flavanols' sun-protecting prowess. After 3 months eating chocolate with high levels of flavanols, their study subjects' skin took twice as long to develop that reddening effect that indicates the beginning of a burn."

    So That guy can push off, you eat your damn chocolate girl, and savor it! lol
  • Archerychickge
    Archerychickge Posts: 606 Member
    Anyone who tells me how to lose weight has ZERO chance with me.

    Including my husband. :D
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
    But, was it possible that this was his very stupid, awkward, rude, silly attempt to strike up a conversation and possilby flirt with you?

    If so: Worst Pickup Line Ever.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member

    Thank you for classifying all Marines as rude. How about we turn it around and say he's just using the personality that his male chromosomes gave him? You would call it sexist and say not all men are rude. Making blanket statements like that makes you look ignorant.

    Sincerely,
    A United States Marine

    QFT
  • _crafty_
    _crafty_ Posts: 1,682 Member

    Thank you for classifying all Marines as rude. How about we turn it around and say he's just using the personality that his male chromosomes gave him? You would call it sexist and say not all men are rude. Making blanket statements like that makes you look ignorant.

    Sincerely,
    A United States Marine

    I married a Marine. :flowerforyou:
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    1. He's a DB.

    2. Good job sticking up for yourself.

    3. Oversensitive would be if you carried this on with you forever.

    So, in short, yay, here's your pat on the back. Now...

    giphy.gif
  • also the other day I was walking through my apartment complex and two of my neighbors made fun of my weight, I was pretty damn heart broken - yea it hurt my feelings, but what they dont know is 7 months ago I broke my ribs, and 2 months prior to that I dislocated my shoulder, so I havent been medically allowed to work out. They also don't know I have a medical condition that causes me to have higher estrogen levels than most males, which makes it harder for me to lose weight, what they dont know is im starting on medication soon, and I was just medically released to work out again for my shoulder and ribs.
    People say things because they have been conditioned to act or be that way, regardless of where they picked it up. And people suck, But honey you just put your chin up and you remember that you and only you matter when it comes to how you feel about yourself. My boyfriend saw how badly I was upset and tried to make me feel better, and ya know it doesn't help. We all assume our sig. other are bias anyway. but what did help is that I know I am doing better for me, and I may not be where I want to be yet, but I am still doing a lot better than I was when I was just sitting on the couch.
  • AliceDark
    AliceDark Posts: 3,886 Member

    Thank you for classifying all Marines as rude. How about we turn it around and say he's just using the personality that his male chromosomes gave him? You would call it sexist and say not all men are rude. Making blanket statements like that makes you look ignorant.

    Sincerely,
    A United States Marine
    ^ This.
    All the Marines I know are the most polite, respectful people.
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    btw, servicemen/women are some of the most courteous, helpful people out there. There are some twatwaffles among them, just like any other profession, but that shouldn't reflect badly on them as a whole.

    Sincerely,
    Daughter of a Navy Chief

    Edited: word choice
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    So since I moved to the south I'm "targeted" less and less, which is awesome. People making snide remarks or just generally not minding their business is becoming few and far between. Today was not the case.

    I was trying to decide between two different chocolates. "TOM" is visiting and one of the few times I'll have GOOD chocolate is during this particular time of the month. It is all logged. Whatever.

    From the corner of my eye I saw a young-ish and pretty attractive marine approach me. He just stood there for a minute then said...

    " If you're GOING to eat chocolate anyway, you should try skinny cow. There's less calories."

    W...T...F ?

    I blush really easily. I could tell my face was probably dark dark dark red. First instinct was I should just start crying. I'm emotional, I'm having cravings, I don't want to be in public with the other half dozen people in this aisle hearing what he just said to me. But no, I took a deep breath, turned to him and said "Listen. I know you think you're helping. But you don't know me. I'm a stranger. You don't know that I've already lost 80 lbs and continue to lose. You don't know that I count calories. And you apparently don't know that it's just rude to approach anyone publicly like this the way you just did to me. Just thought you should know that before you try to pull this on anyone else."

    I turned back to the chocolate, but the guy actually scoffed and said "Really? Good luck being sensitive all your life. Jesus." then started walking away. I said "I'm not sensitive. I'm being stern with someone who obviously has no home training. Have a nice day." The last part I half shouted since he was already walking down the aisle and he just waved me off. But at that point we had already gotten a few looks from other people. I don't care. I'm tired of the people who think that they're doing "us" a favor. You're not. My life is not your business. If you're not my doctor or my significant other, please stay out of it unless I invite you. Thanks.

    Happy Friday people -noms on chocolate-
    Ah.

    This is like when someone cuts me off in traffic, I nearly get into an accident trying to avoid hitting the person or someone else, honk my horn and the person who cut me off gives me the finger.

    There was a thread here a couple weeks ago full of people who think that man's behavior is perfectly reasonable, so I'm not exactly surprised by it. You handled it perfectly.

  • Thank you for classifying all Marines as rude. How about we turn it around and say he's just using the personality that his male chromosomes gave him? You would call it sexist and say not all men are rude. Making blanket statements like that makes you look ignorant.

    Sincerely,
    A United States Marine

    hear hear
    Sincerely,
    Sleeping with a United States Marine (not her, although I might, ya never know!)
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member

    Thank you for classifying all Marines as rude. How about we turn it around and say he's just using the personality that his male chromosomes gave him? You would call it sexist and say not all men are rude. Making blanket statements like that makes you look ignorant.

    Sincerely,
    A United States Marine
    howrude_fulllhouse.gif~c200

    (ohai :blushing: )
  • MOST excellent rebuttal. You stood up for yourself, without getting hysterical. You were not overly sensitive at all. I probably would have spat in his face and asked him how many calories were in THAT.

    ^^ I LIKE THIS :smile:
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member

    Thank you for classifying all Marines as rude. How about we turn it around and say he's just using the personality that his male chromosomes gave him? You would call it sexist and say not all men are rude. Making blanket statements like that makes you look ignorant.

    Sincerely,
    A United States Marine

    How YOU doin'????
  • This content has been removed.

  • If so: Worst Pickup Line Ever.


    Couldn't agree more, its right there with saying, "Hey Im not the greatest looking guy in this bar, but im the only one talking to you" if you're going to be a **** bag you should have to wear a ****ing caution sign
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    btw, servicemen/women are some of the most courteous, helpful people out there. There are some twatwaffles among them, just like any other profession, but that shouldn't reflect badly on them as a whole.

    Sincerely,
    Daughter of a Navy Chief

    Edited: word choice
    I haven't read anything beyond the OP, but also this. SO MUCH THIS.
  • amy8400
    amy8400 Posts: 478 Member

    My first thought. I guess we're in the minority.

    I kind of thought the same thing. Though I'm in the minority, I probably wouldn't have fired back at him so defensively. I probably would have looked straight at him and said, "Really? Have you tried these things...are they good? I've lost 80 pounds and occasionally crave chocolate as a treat. So you like them?"

    You never know. Maybe he's lost a lot of weight, too but doesn't have the best social skills. Few people are outright rude to your face :flowerforyou: