MOMMIES FUNNY KID STORIES...

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Replies

  • Manda86
    Manda86 Posts: 1,859 Member
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:
  • BlazinEmerald
    BlazinEmerald Posts: 842
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Me toooooo, I want another badly. If only I could get my immigration stuff settled and not have to pay another 12 grand out , I'd have one in a heartbeat :heart:
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Let's get you married off first!!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:

    LOL! I was thinking the same thing but was trying to NOT say too much for once! HAHAHA! Methinks my moutheth becometh too bigetth at times! :wink: :wink:
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:

    LOL! I was thinking the same thing but was trying to NOT say too much for once! HAHAHA! Methinks my moutheth becometh too bigetth at times! :wink: :wink:

    Well...that's what I'm here for. :laugh:

    Un-couth R Us. :blushing:
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    These are so cute!!

    When my DH and I were first dating, I took him back home to meet my family. My nephew at the time was only 3 and had a hard time articulating his words.
    Anyhow, we were all sitting in the living room and DH had just finished playing soccer with him. As my DH sat down, my nephew turns to him and say " Gary, you're the b#tch!"
    We all stared at each other trying not to laugh and my sister said to me "he's trying to say the word best". Gary you're the best is what he was trying to say.
    It was so funny!

    :flowerforyou:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I didn't have time to read all of these before....
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    My son, Owen, is 22 months old. Last week we took him to church. He somehow got his head stuck between the pew and the wall. He started screaming and the whole congregation was looking at us. My husband had to stand on two pews and pull him out. I thought we were going to have to go home and get the butter. I was mortified and trying not to laugh at the same time.

    Oh, my, I cannot even imagine the embarrassment, but it sure is funny now that his head isn't stuck anymore!!!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:

    LOL! I was thinking the same thing but was trying to NOT say too much for once! HAHAHA! Methinks my moutheth becometh too bigetth at times! :wink: :wink:

    Well...that's what I'm here for. :laugh:

    Un-couth R Us. :blushing:

    Nahhh! YOU can pull it off because you are the funny one. Me?? I'm just a wannabe funny lady!! :sad:
  • BlazinEmerald
    BlazinEmerald Posts: 842
    NOt my kid , but my cousin this story is about, lol. When we were little my cousin had a bit of a speach impediment. Now my grandparents are traveling evangelist/singers and now have their own church at home now that they are older. So we were having a big homecomming at church , tons of food and tons of people!

    Well Travis goes up to Mamaw and yells " GRANNY I WANT SOME P!SSY AND SH!TTY" well every one of the church goers about died you can imagine. Mamaw had to explain he was asking for "pepsi and Chili " hehehe
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:

    LOL! I was thinking the same thing but was trying to NOT say too much for once! HAHAHA! Methinks my moutheth becometh too bigetth at times! :wink: :wink:

    Well...that's what I'm here for. :laugh:

    Un-couth R Us. :blushing:

    Nahhh! YOU can pull it off because you are the funny one. Me?? I'm just a wannabe funny lady!! :sad:

    pffffttt...whatevah! rolleyes.gif
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    I have a friend, whose son dressed himself completely in her self-adhesive sanitary napkins.... what a picture that was.
  • BigCityKittyz
    BigCityKittyz Posts: 378
    I have a friend, whose son dressed himself completely in her self-adhesive sanitary napkins.... what a picture that was.

    Was he the original designer for this?..........Gifted......truly GIFTED!:laugh:

    l_c23390c54451bcd6411bd2bf2eb5d039.jpg[/url]
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    Oh no..............rolf:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: No, his didn't cover as much:laugh: :laugh:
  • Koozy81
    Koozy81 Posts: 250 Member
    These are SOO funny, my little Brooklynn is only 4 months old, so she smiles and laughs out loud right now, no words yet, but I cant wait!!
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    These are SOO funny, my little Brooklynn is only 4 months old, so she smiles and laughs out loud right now, no words yet, but I cant wait!!

    That was absolutely my favorite time, when they started laughing! Enjoy your little one, they grow so fast. I remember thinking how trite that was when I had babies, even though I enjoyed each of them so much, but trite as it is, it is so true.
  • foxfire9372
    foxfire9372 Posts: 184 Member
    My youngest, last summer, running into the house, naked from the waist down, telling me he had went poo-poo. Dragged me outside and sure enough, right by a big pile from the dog was a little boy pile.

    Most uncomfortable, my youngest (yeah, my hellion) in the commissary, telling everyone that walked by that his pee-pee was hard. He was so proud of that fact, I was just glad he kept his pants on and after telling about 7 people got tired of me telling him tmi.
  • debuckl
    debuckl Posts: 360 Member
    When my son was three I took him grocery shopping with me. Walking down one aisle he told me "Mom you have a fat butt..." I wasn't really offended. What does a three year old know anyway? But I did want to teach him that what he was saying wasn't nice or appropriate. I gave a very nice speech and was proud of myself for not being mad, but taking a moment to teach him some manners. Immediately he said, "But mom you Do have a fat butt!." This time I was upset that he wasn't listening to me, but chose to ignore him. The very next minute I bent over to pick something off the bottom shelf and my pants split in half....all the way across my fat butt! :blushing:
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    Oh no.....:laugh: Kids say the darndest things!!!!!!!!!!!
  • GIGINATOR
    GIGINATOR Posts: 355 Member
    Ok, right after I had my second son my three year old barged in the bathroom (as they always do) as I was changing my pad. He asked what I was doing. So I explained that mommies have a boo boo after the baby is born. He was happy with that answer and nothing more was said. UNTIL....... we went to the grocery store at the checkout line. I put a package of pads on the conveyor and my son yells out for everyone around to hear "Hey mom, are those the bandaids for your butt?" I wanted to crawl in a hole!!:embarassed:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    This is a former-nanny story....

    My first job in New Jersey, I had the boys with me at the grocery store (I was about 19), and we were checking out. The oldest boy was getting some Yoohoo.....and the lady checking us out see's it and says "ohhhh, I LOVE Yoohooo!".......and Michael (the 3 year old at the time), looks from the Yoohoo to her and back to the Yoohoo and back to her......and finally asks "Is that how you turned black???"

    I wanted to crawl into the grocery bag and hide!!!!!
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    I got a call from a hysterical mommy a few years back; her son had climbed their Christmas Tree laden with expensive ornaments from Europe. She had put the nicest ornaments at the top out of his reach and the "kid" ornaments at the bottom. So, I watched him for her while she cleaned up the mess.

    On the same line, one Christmas I heard a few crash bangs and came running only to find my then 3-yr old whacking the Christmas ornaments off the tree with his big red plastic bat.
  • adore217
    adore217 Posts: 33
    My 6 year old son, who was four at the time, decided to wake up for a midnight snack one night. I thought I heard someone in the kitchen so I got up and saw no one. As soon as I laid back down I heard the same noise again. I walked back into the kitchen, this time walking all the way around our center island, to find him eating an entire pan of brownies. Before I could say anything he says "Mommy, you didn't see this". I couldn't help but laugh...how could you get mad at that!
  • apdoxies
    apdoxies Posts: 57
    LOL These are great stories!

    Last summer, my son & daughter were playing outside spraying each other with the garden hose. Well, my daughter was tired of playing and decided to go in. But not Logan (my son), Oh no...he wasn't finished playing yet. SO he follows her into the house....with the hose... & proceeds to chase her through the house spaying her. He then decides that our pet rabbit needed a bath, along with our new 52" big screen and the entire living room floor.
    Where was I? My husband & I had gone down our hill to my in-laws house to get the Nordic Track. We were gone 5 minutes...literally! When we got back, not only was everything soaked, but when we walked across the carpet, watch squished up between our toes!
    We used a Shop-Vac to suck the water up & had to empty it like 3 times. The floor was damp for almost a week!
  • KrisKabob
    KrisKabob Posts: 1,250 Member
    When my son was three I took him grocery shopping with me. Walking down one aisle he told me "Mom you have a fat butt..." I wasn't really offended. What does a three year old know anyway? But I did want to teach him that what he was saying wasn't nice or appropriate. I gave a very nice speech and was proud of myself for not being mad, but taking a moment to teach him some manners. Immediately he said, "But mom you Do have a fat butt!." This time I was upset that he wasn't listening to me, but chose to ignore him. The very next minute I bent over to pick something off the bottom shelf and my pants split in half....all the way across my fat butt! :blushing:

    OMG... I don't know if I should laugh or cry... been there, girl!!! I feel your pain!!! HAHA!!!:laugh:
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
    LOL These are great stories!


    We used a Shop-Vac to suck the water up & had to empty it like 3 times. The floor was damp for almost a week!

    Oh my, I just remembered when we had to do that because our son (same one) put the plug in the overflow sink in the basement in Virginia so he could play with his boats. Well, I started the washing machine later without noticing, and came back to a flooded basement.
  • icandoit
    icandoit Posts: 4,163 Member
    Here is one more from my kids-My daughter was scratching her head with her foot. I asked her what she was doing? She told me she was itchy and she was a puppy.
    I wish I could scratch my head with my foot:noway:
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