MOMMIES FUNNY KID STORIES...

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  • amandat_79
    amandat_79 Posts: 221 Member
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    My 4 y/o (2 at the time) decided to make breakfast. He had the eggs, butter and bread out of the fridge and the toaster out of the cabinet. I came out and found about 6 eggs broken in the toaster, bread and everything else all over the floor and him standing there with a big smile on his face.

    Hahaha... I'm so glad mine isn't the only one to decide to get into the cupboards and help himself. Too cute!!
  • icandoit
    icandoit Posts: 4,163 Member
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    My 3 year old came out of the bathroom with a tampon in her butt cheeks and said that she started .

    We went out to dinner and there was a funny smell (my son nor my husband would confess) and when the waiter came to drop off out food, my daughter asked him if he farted. :blushing:

    My son was 2 and is now 13-we were at our friends for a BBQ and he needed to go pee-the bathroom was being used, so he stood up on the chair and peed in the fountain.

    My daughter shared with all when we had our dog fixed-she told them that Nitro is said cause my mom chopped off his cherries.
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    Last summer we spent the weekend down in Colorado Springs. We (hubby, my then 6-year old daughter) & myself were touring the Chapel at the Air Force Academy (beautiful!!). They chapel is comprised of several different denominations in different parts of the church.

    We were coming out of the Catholic sanctuary (we're not Catholic) when my daughter sees the Holy Water. She joyfully exclaims, "oh look, a bath" and then dunks her Barbie doll in it. Well of course at that moment a woman walks in & if looks could have killed, me, daughter & wet Barbie would have been a pile of ashes!

    DH & I were cracking up outside the church, while daughter is, dunno.gif "what??? What's so funny??" :tongue:
  • GravyGurl
    GravyGurl Posts: 1,070
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    My 3 year old came out of the bathroom with a tampon in her butt cheeks and said that she started .

    We went out to dinner and there was a funny smell (my son nor my husband would confess) and when the waiter came to drop off out food, my daughter asked him if he farted. :blushing:

    My son was 2 and is now 13-we were at our friends for a BBQ and he needed to go pee-the bathroom was being used, so he stood up on the chair and peed in the fountain.

    My daughter shared with all when we had our dog fixed-she told them that Nitro is said cause my mom chopped off his cherries.

    24.gif
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
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    Last summer we spent the weekend down in Colorado Springs. We (hubby, my then 6-year old daughter) & myself were touring the Chapel at the Air Force Academy (beautiful!!). They chapel is comprised of several different denominations in different parts of the church.

    We were coming out of the Catholic sanctuary (we're not Catholic) when my daughter sees the Holy Water. She joyfully exclaims, "oh look, a bath" and then dunks her Barbie doll in it. Well of course at that moment a woman walks in & if looks could have killed, me, daughter & wet Barbie would have been a pile of ashes!

    Barbie probably needed that :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    When my 21-yr old was 2, he was looking at something on the driveway that turned out to be a wooly caterpillar, and he said, "Look, it's a eyebrow!"
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    Last summer we spent the weekend down in Colorado Springs. We (hubby, my then 6-year old daughter) & myself were touring the Chapel at the Air Force Academy (beautiful!!). They chapel is comprised of several different denominations in different parts of the church.

    We were coming out of the Catholic sanctuary (we're not Catholic) when my daughter sees the Holy Water. She joyfully exclaims, "oh look, a bath" and then dunks her Barbie doll in it. Well of course at that moment a woman walks in & if looks could have killed, me, daughter & wet Barbie would have been a pile of ashes!

    Barbie probably needed that :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    When my 21-yr old was 2, he was looking at something on the driveway that turned out to be a wooly caterpillar, and he said, "Look, it's a eyebrow!"

    :laugh:

    That's what they look like, too!
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
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    They do. Just the thought of a random eyebrow laying on the driveway sends me into stitches to this day....:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
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    Well, my son is just really starting to talk and put sentences together...so I am sure it will be interesting what comes out of his mouth.

    The funniest (well, not so much at the time)...thing that is happening lately is his urge to take his diaper off! If I put him down for a nap in a t-shirt and diaper..he will take it off if he does anything in it! 2 weeks ago, he had a poop, and took his diaper off in his crib...Yes, it was gross...

    BUT, the day he was playing while I was fixing dinner and took his diaper off, sat on my mini stair-stepper and pooped on it....(It had tread!).....well...that topped it all!!! I was trying to figure out if he needs to be potty trained or doesn't want me exercising! :laugh: :laugh:

    Oh, and the cutest thing he is doing these days is sitting in his room with a book (sometimes its upside down)...and as he turns each page, he "reads" out loud. Of course it's pretty much 1 1/2 year old gibberish...but HE knows what he's saying! It's so sweet! We have been reading to him since he was really tiny and he LOVES books.
  • KrisKabob
    KrisKabob Posts: 1,250 Member
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    A couple of months ago my husband and I taught my son (who is now 14 months) where is 'boobies" are... we will say "Dom, where are your boobies?" and he will put his hands on his chest - SO FUNNY! Well, recently he happen to catch me changing my shirt (and bra) and so unexpectedly he says "BOOBIE" while pointing at my chest!!!! I almost died laughing!!! Hahaha!!! :laugh:

    He's so adorable... I never thought I'd have this much joy being a Mommy!!! :love:
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
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    Oh, and the cutest thing he is doing these days is sitting in his room with a book (sometimes its upside down)...and as he turns each page, he "reads" out loud. Of course it's pretty much 1 1/2 year old gibberish...but HE knows what he's saying! It's so sweet! We have been reading to him since he was really tiny and he LOVES books.

    Oh, I miss those days.....:love: Not the diaper-taking off days. I've had to clean up after that many times, and once one of my daughters tried to clean it up herself. You can just imagine how well she did........:huh:
  • Manda86
    Manda86 Posts: 1,859 Member
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    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:
  • BlazinEmerald
    BlazinEmerald Posts: 842
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    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Me toooooo, I want another badly. If only I could get my immigration stuff settled and not have to pay another 12 grand out , I'd have one in a heartbeat :heart:
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
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    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Let's get you married off first!!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
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    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:

    LOL! I was thinking the same thing but was trying to NOT say too much for once! HAHAHA! Methinks my moutheth becometh too bigetth at times! :wink: :wink:
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:

    LOL! I was thinking the same thing but was trying to NOT say too much for once! HAHAHA! Methinks my moutheth becometh too bigetth at times! :wink: :wink:

    Well...that's what I'm here for. :laugh:

    Un-couth R Us. :blushing:
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
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    These are so cute!!

    When my DH and I were first dating, I took him back home to meet my family. My nephew at the time was only 3 and had a hard time articulating his words.
    Anyhow, we were all sitting in the living room and DH had just finished playing soccer with him. As my DH sat down, my nephew turns to him and say " Gary, you're the b#tch!"
    We all stared at each other trying not to laugh and my sister said to me "he's trying to say the word best". Gary you're the best is what he was trying to say.
    It was so funny!

    :flowerforyou:

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I didn't have time to read all of these before....
  • beep
    beep Posts: 1,242 Member
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    My son, Owen, is 22 months old. Last week we took him to church. He somehow got his head stuck between the pew and the wall. He started screaming and the whole congregation was looking at us. My husband had to stand on two pews and pull him out. I thought we were going to have to go home and get the butter. I was mortified and trying not to laugh at the same time.

    Oh, my, I cannot even imagine the embarrassment, but it sure is funny now that his head isn't stuck anymore!!!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    Options
    *lip quivering*


    I want one...


    :cry:

    Sarge!!! happy107.gif

    Got a job for you to do, buddy! :bigsmile:

    LOL! I was thinking the same thing but was trying to NOT say too much for once! HAHAHA! Methinks my moutheth becometh too bigetth at times! :wink: :wink:

    Well...that's what I'm here for. :laugh:

    Un-couth R Us. :blushing:

    Nahhh! YOU can pull it off because you are the funny one. Me?? I'm just a wannabe funny lady!! :sad:
  • BlazinEmerald
    BlazinEmerald Posts: 842
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    NOt my kid , but my cousin this story is about, lol. When we were little my cousin had a bit of a speach impediment. Now my grandparents are traveling evangelist/singers and now have their own church at home now that they are older. So we were having a big homecomming at church , tons of food and tons of people!

    Well Travis goes up to Mamaw and yells " GRANNY I WANT SOME P!SSY AND SH!TTY" well every one of the church goers about died you can imagine. Mamaw had to explain he was asking for "pepsi and Chili " hehehe

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