For the married couples..who can give advice..just a rant

That_Girl

Well...I have no advice. I took my vows 2 years ago (almost) but I was 33 and quite ready.

I do think getting married young is a bad decision for most people. I have one good friend who married at 17 and is 21 now and happily married with 3 children. But they work at it.

When you take vows, I believe it is forever, unless abuse is going on. You said for better or worse and this could be your worse.

I do agree with the other posters that you can make your marriage what you want to make it. If you think about not being married, and you know this causes fights, then stop fighting when you think this way.

Have you thought about counseling? It could help and give you both helpful ways to react and 'be'.

Maybe take up a hobby as well...but not to meet other people (of the opposite sex).

My rules (for myself) in marriage and friends are: Any friend, male or female, before marriage is allowed. New friends of the opposite sex is not allowed. Why? Because we all know that "things just happen". I don't want to chance it and it's just not appropriate to put energy into a man whom you're not married to.

I wish you peace with this. I don't have any advice really because you've pretty much put yourself where you are. :-) You can chose to make it better.

lashleyrivera

These are all great responses! Thank u so much..the thing is, we were going to divorce about 6 months into our relationship. But decided to wait because we felt like we didn't give marriage a chance. Honestly we r right back in the same situation. We did do the love dare the first time, it worked, for awhile. We learned what eachother wanted out of the relationship..I like words he likes affection, but after awhile it went away ...as far as going out..if I want to go out with friends he kinda has an issue with it and if he wants to go out he never states where he is going..he always says don't worry about..sometimes I feel there may be a slight chance of emotional abuse between eachother...we did have a counselor with the first time, and like I said that worked to, but the same stuff happens, when we go on datenights, we don't talk, the only convo will be about work etc...we don't have many interests..I tried to make him join mfp nd he did for a day, and I always try n motivate him but he pushes the thought away..the only time we have fun is wen we r with another couple..but even then I talk to my friend and he does the same..we have been down this rd before..so I feel its inevitable

lashleyrivera

I should also say, even though I didn't want to, that he uses the fact that I don't work against me..he threatens me with money etc...so I find myself protecting mysekf just out of habit...that's not healthy and when I tell him that he says ok he won't do it again..but then he does..:(