bad jokes

Run4iiiiiit
Run4iiiiiit Posts: 489 Member
edited September 23 in Chit-Chat
◦What do you call a blind dinosaur?
◦An Idontthinkhesaurus
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Replies

  • lloydrt
    lloydrt Posts: 1,121 Member
    whats the piggest pencil in the world/

    Pennsylvania.............pretty bad, lol,.............
  • teeley
    teeley Posts: 477 Member
    HAHAHAHA........that is awesome, the kind of jokes I love!!!!so good
  • Run4iiiiiit
    Run4iiiiiit Posts: 489 Member
    what did the atlantic ocean say to the pacific? nothing he just waved.
  • Run4iiiiiit
    Run4iiiiiit Posts: 489 Member
    111lbs is impressive
    whats the piggest pencil in the world/

    Pennsylvania.............pretty bad, lol,.............
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
    What's the longest word in the world?

    Smiles. There's a mile between the first and last letters. :tongue:
  • chrissyh
    chrissyh Posts: 8,235 Member
    What's black and white and read all over.....a newspaper
    What's black and white and red all over....an embarrassed Zebra
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
    How do you keep a moron in suspense?
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    How do you keep a moron in suspense?

    How??? How???? Tell me!!!!!!! tantrum.gif
  • Carolyn72
    Carolyn72 Posts: 22 Member
    -"Knock knock"

    -"Who's there?"

    -"Interrupting cow"

    -"Interrupti..."

    -"Mooooo!"
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    -"Knock knock"

    -"Who's there?"

    -"Interrupting cow"

    -"Interrupti..."

    -"Mooooo!"

    You just made my 9-year-old crack up! :laugh: :flowerforyou:
  • Boston01810
    Boston01810 Posts: 2,267 Member
    This site is very funny
    For some reason the only joke I ever remember is:
    What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Answer: snowballs
  • jkestens63
    jkestens63 Posts: 1,164 Member
    What do you do when you break your toe?

    Call a "toe" truck.

    Only joke I remember cause it was my mom's favorite, cracked her up every time.
  • B40FireGuy
    B40FireGuy Posts: 10 Member
    A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?"
  • Run4iiiiiit
    Run4iiiiiit Posts: 489 Member
    2 eggs, 2 strips of bacon, and 2 pancakes walk into a bar...bartenender looks up and says sorry we don't serve breakfast.
  • Shamrockkx
    Shamrockkx Posts: 18
    "Knock Knock"
    "Who's there?"
    "I eat mop"
    "I eat mop who?"
    ...you'll figure it out lol.

    What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
    "Where's my tractor?"


    What did the man say when he walked into the bar?
    "Ouch."


    "Knock Knock"
    "Who's There?"
    and then you just don't say anything.
    That one always makes me laugh ahha..
    or
    "Knock knock"
    "Who's there?"
    "Woo"
    "Woo Who?"
    "What are you so excited for? It's only a joke."
    Lol. :]
  • Shamrockkx
    Shamrockkx Posts: 18
    What do you call a fish with no eye?
    Fshhhhhh.
  • DS13
    DS13 Posts: 136
    How does Gaga like her meat??

    Rawww rawww RAWRAWRAWWW
  • MobiusMan
    MobiusMan Posts: 385 Member
    "Knock Knock"
    "Who's there?"
    "I eat mop"
    "I eat mop who?"
    That is funny as hell

    Read this slowly 10 times
    "EYE ARE SOFA KING WE TODD DID"
  • Run4iiiiiit
    Run4iiiiiit Posts: 489 Member
    How does Gaga like her meat??

    Rawww rawww RAWRAWRAWWW
    how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
    What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
    "Where's my tractor?"

    That one cracked me up. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
    Knock, knock.
    Who's there?
    Dwayne.
    Dwayne who?
    Dwayne the bathtub, I'm dwowning.
  • abyt42
    abyt42 Posts: 1,358 Member
    (This is my only joke...and I'm an English teacher.... you've been forewarned)


    It looks like Christmas will be postponed this year. The elves are on strike, renegotiating their contract.
    (beat)

    They want to be known as subordinate clauses.
  • Kelleinna
    Kelleinna Posts: 160
    A man called the fire station in a panic. "Come quickly!" he said. "My house is burning down!"

    "Okay," said the fireman. "How do we get to your house?"

    "What? You mean you don't have those shiny red trucks anymore?!"

    (Yes, that was lame... I shall now go hide in shame.)
  • Kelleinna
    Kelleinna Posts: 160
    A bear walked into a bar. He said to the bartender, "I'll have a rum and........... coke." The bartender asked, "What's with the big pause?" "What, these?" the bear asked. "I've always had them."
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    Q - How do you catch a squirrel??

    A - Climb a tree and act like a nut. *ba-dum-dum*
  • Pattilynne
    Pattilynne Posts: 61
    "Knock Knock"
    "Who's there?"
    "I eat mop"
    "I eat mop who?"
    That is funny as hell

    Read this slowly 10 times
    "EYE ARE SOFA KING WE TODD DID"
    what kind of car does a proctologist drive?
    a brown probe
  • abyt42
    abyt42 Posts: 1,358 Member
    Q - How do you catch a squirrel??

    A - Climb a tree and act like a nut. *ba-dum-dum*
    Gotta remember this!
  • Kelleinna
    Kelleinna Posts: 160
    What do you get if you cross an elephant with a rhino?

    Elefino. (Read it out loud.)
  • msbahtley
    msbahtley Posts: 1
    How do you catch a unique rabbit?
    U-nique up on him!

    How do you catch a tame tiger?
    the tame way!
  • Run4iiiiiit
    Run4iiiiiit Posts: 489 Member
    these are great
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