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why delete friends when they added you for support

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Replies

  • proverbs31chick
    proverbs31chick Posts: 485 Member
    Eh I wouldn't take it personally. I delete when people haven't logged for awhile, or if they're super negative all the time. I'm on here to be motivated & enjoy positive people who are into a healthy lifestyle. There's so many people on this website, I'm sure you'll find other people who will help motivate you & support you, I wouldn't dwell on the people who just didn't click. :)

    Interesting, how in the world do know which of your friends have or have not logged in. I am busy keeping track of myself, I don't check my "friends" to see what they have been doing.
  • catcrazy
    catcrazy Posts: 1,740 Member
    I've just got rid of a few...I just looked back and realised there were a handful that were slipping on and off the wagon, hadn't commented on my status' for at least a month.


    I comment on every single one of my MFP pals at least 3-4 times a week, I comment on there weight losses, commiserate on gains, offer support if theyre having a bad time and if they fall off the wagon and ask for help I offer my take on it. I'd like the same support back but if they can't be bothered commenting occasionally why should I bother going 12 hours back down the feed each morning looking for posts i've missed.

    If theyre deleting you within a few days then chances are theyre searching for people with specific goals/ideals etc and do not let it worry you.
  • catcrazy
    catcrazy Posts: 1,740 Member


    Interesting, how in the world do know which of your friends have or have not logged in. I am busy keeping track of myself, I don't check my "friends" to see what they have been doing.

    it comes up on your wall when someone has not logged in
  • heathersmilez
    heathersmilez Posts: 2,579 Member
    I'll add and accept people I have a common interests in or attributes whether it be age, body size, education or hobbies.

    After a time you learn more about the person through their status' and comments in the community you realize you no longer want this type of person as "support".

    I.e. I recently deleted a person b/c she is on 10 anti-depression meds. It's not personal despite what you may think but I don't need weight-loss "support" from someone who has such heavy medical issues. There isn't an ounce of me that can relate, it’s not that I don’t sympathize I just don’t need to see the intense emotional rollercoaster daily on my news feed. This is an online community, if a real-life friend or co-worker had these same issues I’d be by their side.
  • ickybella
    ickybella Posts: 1,438 Member
    I too am at the 250-friend limit. If someone either hasn't logged in for a couple of weeks, or hasn't logged in for three days and this happens once a week, I delete the person. I also delete people who have no activity at all. I don't understand adding people as friends if you are not going to complete your diary, exercise, or at least cheer them on. I figure there is a waiting list of 18 people who are willing to support me and who are trying hard and deserve my support, so I delete the inactive ones. Also, if I add someone from the waiting list, because I've just deleted someone else who never logs in, and that person already hasn't logged in for a few days, I go ahead and delete them right then. I know it's harsh, but that's how I do it.
  • Trjlove
    Trjlove Posts: 28
    Well I think that shows what kind of friend they really are. Don't sweet it!!! They were probably not healthy for you long term. :happy:
  • goron59
    goron59 Posts: 890 Member
    I delete people that have nothing in their profile, no picture, no activity or are trying to promote or sell something. I think this place is all about give and take.

    Also, I've deleted a couple of people because they were just too noisy and it was hard to see anybody else for all their posts.
  • kaits108
    kaits108 Posts: 305 Member


    Interesting, how in the world do know which of your friends have or have not logged in. I am busy keeping track of myself, I don't check my "friends" to see what they have been doing.

    it comes up on your wall when someone has not logged in

    Yep! Thanks :)

    Side note: I like to keep up with my friends, and when I see on my feed that someone hasn't posted in over a week I usually delete. I have friends on this website to check on and keep up with their progress so I can help support them on their journey. If I was too busy to check on my friends, I wouldn't bother to add ANYONE :)
  • Mairgheal
    Mairgheal Posts: 385 Member
    I'm actually quite shocked, well, surprised I should say I suppose, to read the amount of people who have 250 "friends" here. What's the point of that??
  • tiffvea
    tiffvea Posts: 51
    I'm typically a very positive person and stay away from negative comments, but I must say, when the lady said my burning only 280 calories wasn't pushing myself, then deleted me 3 days later......almost like she was thinking I was a lost cause! Well, just because I don't always burn 900 calories a day, like she did often, doesn't make me any less of a person. Matter of fact, I'll pat myself on the back for losing 43 lbs BEFORE I ever started myfitnesspal! I've lost 14 since being on here, and I'm now down to the final 20! Go me!!
    Also, thanks for all the friend adds.....I appreciate the SUPPORT!
  • tiffvea
    tiffvea Posts: 51
    Well I think that shows what kind of friend they really are. Don't sweet it!!! They were probably not healthy for you long term. :happy:

    Thanks, I'm not going for 300 friends or anything, that's not what it's about.....but when people add me, don't comment I'm not doing enough then delete me, you know?
    Also, good luck to your adventure to health!
  • tiffvea
    tiffvea Posts: 51
    I too am at the 250-friend limit. If someone either hasn't logged in for a couple of weeks, or hasn't logged in for three days and this happens once a week, I delete the person. I also delete people who have no activity at all. I don't understand adding people as friends if you are not going to complete your diary, exercise, or at least cheer them on. I figure there is a waiting list of 18 people who are willing to support me and who are trying hard and deserve my support, so I delete the inactive ones. Also, if I add someone from the waiting list, because I've just deleted someone else who never logs in, and that person already hasn't logged in for a few days, I go ahead and delete them right then. I know it's harsh, but that's how I do it.

    I'm typically a very positive person and stay away from negative comments, but I must say, when the lady said my burning only 280 calories wasn't pushing myself, then deleted me 3 days later......almost like she was thinking I was a lost cause! Well, just because I don't always burn 900 calories a day, like she did often, doesn't make me any less of a person. Matter of fact, I'll pat myself on the back for losing 43 lbs BEFORE I ever started myfitnesspal! I've lost 14 since being on here, and I'm now down to the final 20! Go me!!
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    Ive been deleted a few times,it dosent really bother me.People add me and them come to find out i cuss alot and am a little weird or whatever lol
  • BigBoneSista
    BigBoneSista Posts: 2,389 Member
    I'm typically a very positive person and stay away from negative comments, but I must say, when the lady said my burning only 280 calories wasn't pushing myself, then deleted me 3 days later......almost like she was thinking I was a lost cause! Well, just because I don't always burn 900 calories a day, like she did often, doesn't make me any less of a person. Matter of fact, I'll pat myself on the back for losing 43 lbs BEFORE I ever started myfitnesspal! I've lost 14 since being on here, and I'm now down to the final 20! Go me!!
    Also, thanks for all the friend adds.....I appreciate the SUPPORT!

    WHAAAAT!! That was her reason! Thats absurd. You didn't need her as a supporter. She did you a favor. Be happy.
  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
    Very rarely will I actually send a request to people. They generally request me and I will accept, as such, they are free to leave as they please. I'm secure with my own efforts. If they're unaware of my quirks, they'll either find out soon enough or they will receive a welcome message from me with a disclaimer, forewarning them that I'm not of the "norm" of society. But they will only receive a message if there was one attached to the request. I give back what I get. I'm unbiased and fair that way.
  • 123456654321
    123456654321 Posts: 1,311 Member
    Try not to take it personally. I end up deleting a lot of people. Mostly because I accept friend requests willy nilly but then after I add them I never hear from them again, they become inactive, we have nothing in common, or in a few cases.....they just really annoy me. I don't know why I should have to keep anyone on my friends list that I don't connect with.
  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
    I'm typically a very positive person and stay away from negative comments, but I must say, when the lady said my burning only 280 calories wasn't pushing myself, then deleted me 3 days later......almost like she was thinking I was a lost cause! Well, just because I don't always burn 900 calories a day, like she did often, doesn't make me any less of a person. Matter of fact, I'll pat myself on the back for losing 43 lbs BEFORE I ever started myfitnesspal! I've lost 14 since being on here, and I'm now down to the final 20! Go me!!
    Also, thanks for all the friend adds.....I appreciate the SUPPORT!

    Oh, really! Well, in that case, she's not worth your time. We all do what we can do. I feel like a "good" burn for me is 300 cals in a day. Some people burn a lot more than that, and that's good for them, but I'm not there. Do what's working for you, and don't worry about the haters. :)
  • kdao
    kdao Posts: 265
    Maybe there are other reasons for deleting you. I know I will delete people if I don't feel they're giving back the support I give them, or if I find that I can't support them the way I should because I don't understand their goals, or if we don't have as much in common as we thought we did, or if I feel they're negative. I don't know you, so I don't know if any of those reasons apply to you, but it might not be because they think you're not "doing enough." Or it might even be just that they have too many people on their friend list, so they go through and delete some.

    Don't take it personally or let it get you down. Just keep on trucking. :)

    I completely agree!
  • 123456654321
    123456654321 Posts: 1,311 Member
    I'm typically a very positive person and stay away from negative comments, but I must say, when the lady said my burning only 280 calories wasn't pushing myself, then deleted me 3 days later......almost like she was thinking I was a lost cause! Well, just because I don't always burn 900 calories a day, like she did often, doesn't make me any less of a person. Matter of fact, I'll pat myself on the back for losing 43 lbs BEFORE I ever started myfitnesspal! I've lost 14 since being on here, and I'm now down to the final 20! Go me!!
    Also, thanks for all the friend adds.....I appreciate the SUPPORT!

    AAAHAHAHA She would be appalled at my little 48 cal burns of "walking up hill at brisk pace" for 10 min on my mini breaks at work xD

    I wouldn't sweat it.
  • AndriaLL
    AndriaLL Posts: 162
    I used to delete people because they posted so many times a day about some fleeting thought or something unrelated to weight loss, that I never saw what any other friends were up to. I recently figured out how to hide them, which seemed a little bit nicer.

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