To many friends not enough support

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  • Sasha_Bear
    Sasha_Bear Posts: 625 Member
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    Hi! My take is that it doesn't matter the size of your list, but the amount of support you get from them. If you have 200 people and only hear or get support from five of them, cut the rest out. You're on a mission, you have things to do, and when it comes to your health, you have every right to get self-centered and think about doing for yourself. If you're posting comments to others and they don't respond back, cut them as well. It's nothing vicious or personal, it's about you wanting to get to a healthy place.

    Likewise, if you can't offer support to the friends on your list, it's better to cut them loose. I'm not saying you have to speak to them every day, but if you have people on your list that you haven't said anything to in weeks, you need to cut them. You're not doing them any justice.

    You don't have to have a lot of people supporting you. Successful basketball teams are 10 men deep. Successful football teams are 55 men deep. Jesus was 12 men deep.

    God Bless!

    Shawn


    I second this!
  • PJilly
    PJilly Posts: 21,719 Member
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    I think there's a huge range of support that people need or want from their friends. I'm not always very active in keeping up with friends' posts and giving them support. Likewise, I don't look to my MFP friends for their comments (but I definitely enjoy reading the ones I get). If someone friends me and discovers later I'm not giving them the support they want, it wouldn't hurt my feelings if they weeded me out. I totally understand that different people have different needs, and we all have to do what works for us. :smile:
  • ThatDollSally
    ThatDollSally Posts: 473 Member
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    I agree with you on this. I don't have a lot of friends on here and I really didn't comment on anyone's accomplishments unless I know them in real life, but I"m trying to be better at it. My problem is that I'll post a couple things and then feel like I'm a creeper and quit. I'm working on it, though!
  • loriefolk
    loriefolk Posts: 352
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    I think I need to clean up my friends list a little. I got people on my list in which I have never seen or heard from. I also got folks on here which I try to support, motivate, and offer a kind word or two that never return the gesture. This isn't Facebook I'm not trying to see how many friends I can collect. I want people who I can support and who will do the same for me. Some folks just taking up space from people who can really use some support! Does anyone else have this problem with there MFP circle? Do you think it's better to have a small group of friends compared to a big one?

    Ha! I just cleaned up my buddy list for the same reason :) I went from more than 100 to just over 10. I like to be able to build personal relationships and keep each other going! So I kept who always supported me and dropped the others that never posted on any of my little successes :)
  • ThaiKaren
    ThaiKaren Posts: 341 Member
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    Yes I feel exactly the same, I have got quite a few friends but it's usually the same few who offer supportive posts. By the way add me as a friend if you want because I reply usually to everyone's posts even if it's just one comment
  • navvs15
    navvs15 Posts: 165
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    I do apologize if I'm not supportive enough, I do try and comment on everyone of my friends accomplishments, etc. But I do miss some of them. :frown:

    You do fine and I don't want any of my friends to feel singled out.I know we are all on a mission and life is hectic! I too have ,to be more cautious about biting off more then I could chew so to speak. Cause I only have 45friends and its hard to reach out to everyone.


    Alright, just making sure I wasn't one of those people. :smile:
  • osman2011
    osman2011 Posts: 8
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    I just started about 3 weeks ago and would like a few friends to help encourage me and I will do the same. I have only one friend and she is going thru medical issues with her mother and not able to connect at this time. How do you go about adding new friend. Would like to keep it under 10 people, and they have at least 50 lbs to lose. I'm in this to get healthy, and help to get my family healthy. Could use a friend!!!
  • themommie
    themommie Posts: 5,019 Member
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    yes I agree. I have alot of friends but just a small percentage that message me or offer support. It is nice to build close relationships with people and support each other. I go through my list about once a month a weed out the people that I never hear from or are no longer longing in to mfp. Everyone has to do what is right for them
  • kimistry35
    kimistry35 Posts: 203 Member
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    well i think that it is time for you to do a lil spring leaning my friend. I'm gonna check in on u every mornin and every afternoon and if you lived in my city we would be working it out at the gym goin hard to shine bright for this summer. so go on and forget about the nonsupports and let's encourage and support one another.
  • susiewusie
    susiewusie Posts: 432 Member
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    I think I need to clean up my friends list a little. I got people on my list in which I have never seen or heard from. I also got folks on here which I try to support, motivate, and offer a kind word or two that never return the gesture. This isn't Facebook I'm not trying to see how many friends I can collect. I want people who I can support and who will do the same for me. Some folks just taking up space from people who can really use some support! Does anyone else have this problem with there MFP circle? Do you think it's better to have a small group of friends compared to a big one?

    You think the same as I do ,I had a bit of a clean up the other day and will be doingthe same again today I get great support of certain people on my list and others who I alwyas say something to have NEVER posted one thing to me !!
    I would much rather have just a few GOOD friends than tons on a list who never bother :smile:
  • kelika71
    kelika71 Posts: 778 Member
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    I couldn't agree more with you. I'm here for myself, first and foremost. After that, I'm here for those that are dedicated and know how to reciprocate the cheering. I've lost count how many times I've cleaned out my list. The more I do it, I'm not feeling as guilty. I hate cutting people, but I need those that are here for the real deal.

    If I wanted to collect friends, I'd start up Facebook. I don't get into that. :)
  • BeLightYear
    BeLightYear Posts: 1,550 Member
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    I couldn't agree more with you. I'm here for myself, first and foremost. After that, I'm here for those that are dedicated and know how to reciprocate the cheering. I've lost count how many times I've cleaned out my list. The more I do it, I'm not feeling as guilty. I hate cutting people, but I need those that are here for the real deal.

    If I wanted to collect friends, I'd start up Facebook. I don't get into that. :)

    Exactly!! I clean out mine about once a month, I've never been much of a collector, but I do enjoy being a supporter!!
  • CarolynnW
    CarolynnW Posts: 35 Member
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    ABSOLUTELY!!!! I've cleaned house twice since I've been on here. I NEED support! I'm not going to repeat what everyone has already said but thanks for posting this. :flowerforyou:

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