Embarassed to share weight loss / starting weight in real li

labgirl3

I've lost 55 lbs now, and I'm very proud of that. I've worked hard and every time I look in the mirror, I'm pleasantly surprised. BUT, when my friends ask me how much I've lost, I'm embarassed to say I've lost that much, since I figure they're doing the mental math and realizing that I was well over 200 lbs before. I know this is fairly ridiculous - they could have looked at me and determined as much, but for some reason the numbers make it more concrete. Instead of telling the truth, I usually tell people that I've lost 30-something pounds when they ask. :embarassed: Or sometimes I'll just say "a lot!" and leave it at that!

At my crossfit box (gym), it's a different story. Those people know exactly what I looked like before, and they are so encouraging and motivating that I don't have a problem sharing my current and starting weight with them. My coach wants to do a little feature on me for the website - kind of a before and during story - but I am reluctant since I don't want people outside of the gym to know how bad it was before! I know this is totally irrational - it's just a number, people could see exactly what I looked like before I lost weight, but I'm still ashamed.

There's the added complication that I'm friends with high school friends on Facebook, and most haven't seen me in over 10 years (although one or two good ones see me at least a few times a year). Again, I know this is shallow and silly, but I don't want all of them knowing that I was so overweight. I have a 20 year reunion coming up this year, and I don't want to be the "former fat girl," - I just want to look great!

I guess I'm just venting. I'm annoyed at myself for worrying about a stupid number so much! I get compliments almost daily from friends and family, and at the gym. I just wish I was more comfortable sharing the numbers.

Has anyone else dealt with something similar?

mikeyrp

Not sure if I can help with this other than to say I have nothing but respect for anyone who takes control of their weight - regardless of the starting point. Be proud!

randi50

I refue to divulge my starting weight until I am way down! lol But when I lose a bunch more, I will be sharing the starting weight because that is an awesome feat!

royam01

Be proud of how much you have lost! You don't need to give everyone the real number but 55 pounds just shows how dedicated you are! If I were you I would tell them! You are doing a great job!

anubis609

I can't say I have the same problem because I'm generally honest about a lot things. I get the opposite reaction when I tell people how much weight I've actually lost because they never thought I was as heavy as I was. I figured they were either bad at assessing weight by sight, or I hid my weight well since I was built for football. In the end, numbers truly don't mean anything because all that matters is that you're losing weight now and that you're proud of your success. What you did or were in the past stays there.

angisnee

I totally understand what you mean. Coworkers have been starting to make comments and ask question about how much I've lost and what I'm doing to lose it. I've never liked being the center of attention, so I get all embarrassed. But I have been telling them how much and that MFP is awesome! If my journey can inspire someone else to make positive changes, I'm going to share it no matter how embarrassed I get.

Be proud of what you've accomplished. People will most likely be more stunned by how hard you've worked than by how much you used to weigh!

Keep up the great work!!!

Badunkadunk_Buster

ABSOLUTELY! I was going the exact same thing. Someone asked me a couple of weeks ago how much I had lost and I said about 40 lbs, when it was actually 48. "What would they think if they knew how much I weighed when I started?" As of today my weight loss is 54 lbs., and I am proud of the work I have done so far, so I posted my weight loss of facebook. And people who had not seen me since I had my child and gained weight had the best things to say about my weight loss. Because they are true friends and care about me, everyone was even more supportive that I could have hoped for.

Itisabouttime

I know what you mean! The last time I decided to lose weight, I dropped a good 20 pounds. If people made comments, I would mumble "Oh, a few pounds I suppose.."
Congrats on your loss!!

Davali

I'm with you on this one - I can't imagine owning up to what my starting weight was until I've lost a lot, lot more than I have so far.

Never thought I was in denial - but I guess I am!!

peteyTwang

" When you`re fat, the world is divided into two groups - people who bug you and people who leave you alone. The funny thing is, supporters and saboteurs exist in either camp" -- Liz Taylor (on her weight fluctuations)

girlruns

Yup! I went through this too. Especially with a friend I've always been competitive with. Usually if people ask, I just say "45 pounds" (I wasn't at my max when I started MFP). They don't know what I weigh now, so they can't do the math, but one person, when told that I wanted to lose another ten (when I was still losing), "what will that put you at, 120 pounds?!?". It was 130 (my goal), but then the math secret is out.

Basically, that rambling was to tell you you aren't being ridiculous, and it is a little embarrassing to admit how high you let your weight get, but people are truthfully more impressed with how much you lost than about how much you had gained. But it is still up to you how open you want to be with people.

Congrats on your amazing accomplishments!

ybba12490

Yup, I'm going through this too! Since I'm taller, I can lose 30lbs and it will only show a slight difference, so I'm going to tell everyone I lost only like 10 if they ask. lol

Once I lose the extra 10-20 after 30 lbs, I can admit that I lost that.

We people are so weird.lol

noltes2

I completely understand. When I started my journey I wouldn't even tell my fiance what I weighed. I told him I would tell him once I lost weight because I was so ashamed of the number. Once I made it from 195 to 165, I finally spilled the beans to him and to the world on MFP. Now I am 153 and will tell the world because that is actually in a healthy weight range for the first time in my adult life! I'm still not at my goal yet, but I am working on it!

It takes alot to admit what you weigh, but you know what? I'm sure almost everyone from high school has gained weight too, and had kids and their bodies have changed. This isn't high school or college anymore and no one should judge you for what life tends to bring us on our journeys... Especially because you have had the courage to DO something about your weight and have an amazing success story. Be proud and embrace the numbers, the loss represents so much time, work and dedication. OWN it, and be proud of every single pound you've lost. Trust me, they are not going to be thinking, "wow, look at how much weight she gained!" they are going to be thinking, "good for her for taking control, she looks amazing now!"

We are our own worst critic, they will be envious if anything!

LosingLatina

When I began my weightloss journey I was 230lbs and my current weight is 168. My ultimate goals is around 145. I am very proud of the 62lbs I have lost! I have no problems sharing my strategies and weightloss with other because they have all been so supportive and so proud of my accomplishments. I may have even inspired a few of them to even try to get heatlhy themselves
Keep up the good work, be proud, and enjoy your success!

jeaniedev

CONGRATS first of all....I am right there with you...I didn't even tell my husband what I weighed....I mean he sees all of me, I am pretty sure he knows I am overweight right???? Tota;;y not rational but still valid feelings...
He now knows what I weigh and I do fear the same thing....mental math, but When I get to where I want to be I want to SCREAM it from the rooftop and tell the world, so they know how strong and amazing I am...to see where I came from and where I am now.....
You shoule try to just change the way you are thinking....BE PROUD....and think of how awesome it is what you have accomplished. Let's face it we all gain weight for various reasons...babies. no exercise, bad genetics...Be proud of where you came from it is what makes you who you are today!!!!!!!!!!!!

callipygianchronicle

Oh friend, you know I have to jump in here.

Feel no guilt about where you are right now. I would just consider a sign that there may be a little bit more internal work to be done on your journey, and that’s okay. That’s why we call it a journey.

There is a part of you that prefers to hold onto the shame you have with being overweight, rather than relish in the pride you should feel for transforming your body. Do you know how many people in this country—how many people using MyFitnessPal—say they want to lose weight, but do nothing about it? Do you know how many people with 60+ pounds to lose quit after losing less-than 10 pounds? How many people refuse to change their eating? Refuse to move their bodies? How many refuse to even get started?

You saw a problem that only you could solve. And you are solving it. Every single day. That is a victory. That is not shameful. Shameful is not celebrating. Shameful is in not owning how powerful you are.

And every time you lie about what you have accomplished by saying, “30 pounds,” when the answer is, “Fifty,” you are telling yourself, “I’m not worthy.” Your weight loss is not a fluke. Your weight loss is something you have earned. You are 100% worthy of it. Your body is not who you are. And the fact that it was once very overweight, does not make you an unlovable or worthless person. You were lovable then. And you are lovable now. And by being willing to live in the truth, you give love to your Self.

Maztastic

Totally agree Yolanda!

lyndyb88

My highest weight was 315.5...I put that on facebook when I decided to start trying to lose weight...I was afraid of what people would think but I also knew that I was accountable for it. If I was embarrassed about it, then I knew I had to change it. I haven't lost as much as you have, but if I had I'd be more than happy to share it with the world. You are doing fantastic! You were gorgeous before and are even more gorgeous now!! Keep telling yourself that this weight loss journey is for YOU...not for anyone else. People are going to be so proud of how much you've lost odds are they won't say how did you weigh that much when you began but rather how can i do what you have done? Losing weight is such an amazing thing and you should feel proud of what you've done

manymuses

I know just how you feel and am right there with you. I've not even lost 20 pounds yet andI think people are amazed that I needed to lose THAT much. Little do they know, I have still have SO far yet to go. (like 4 times that much. Sigh)
I don't mind sharing that here with my fellow MFPers who are all on the same journey, but my Facebook friends are such a diverse mix of friends, family and colleagues that I don't necessarily want to share all of my personal info with everyone. So, yes I know just where you're coming from and have complete empathy for your situation!

galaxysue

I understand where you are coming from I was over 250lbs when i started and didn't lke to tell people what i weighed, not even my husband, I have now lost nearly 84lbs and I still need to go some more after that!! I am just so proud of myself. It's so nice when people notice and make nice comments.So don't worry about what people think, be proud of your achievement, you are doing something about it!!

galaxysue

just noticed your signature we aren't too far apart weightwise now and our goal is the same, hope you get there