Rectal Glaucoma

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BigBeaver
BigBeaver Posts: 858 Member
in Chit-Chat
What are your best excuses for not going to work??

One of my favorites, that i have never used, "Rectal Glaucoma" def.--I can't see my a** coming to work today.
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Replies

  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
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    Well, I haven't used it yet, but after I win the lottery, I'm going to call in rich!

    Ted
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    :laugh:

    I had a co-worker call in once because his wife had cramps. :huh: Yeah, that's exactly when I want my hubby hovering. :laugh: :tongue:
  • roylawrence87
    roylawrence87 Posts: 970 Member
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    Brown bottle flu!
  • jscimeca
    jscimeca Posts: 66
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    I love it!!! Hahahahahaha:laugh:
  • ronda_gettinghealthy
    ronda_gettinghealthy Posts: 777 Member
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    Brown bottle flu!

    ok never heard it- but loving that one!!!!
  • DreamLittleDarling
    DreamLittleDarling Posts: 800 Member
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    hahahahahaha

    and again

    hahahahahaha
  • FairyMiss
    FairyMiss Posts: 1,812 Member
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    had a co worker call in a day after another one had called in. he stated he came down with what she had had. She had called in for severe female cramping

    we all got a good laugh
    btw both those employes had a habit of calling in constantly
  • reese66
    reese66 Posts: 2,920 Member
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    I have spring fever and I won't be able to make it in today...
  • BigBeaver
    BigBeaver Posts: 858 Member
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    The reason I ask, and think these are funny replies, because I am on call 24/7 for people that do call off. And I have heard some good ones.

    My friends car wont start and he's my ride to work.
    My cat/dog is sick.
    and of course all of the usuals-don't feel good, car is broke, etc.

    My favorite one, the one guy called off because he fell off the slide while playing with his kids.
  • roylawrence87
    roylawrence87 Posts: 970 Member
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    I feel too good to go to work today.
  • jsteras
    jsteras Posts: 344 Member
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    Best one I ever heard was working at the nursing home and one of the CNA's called off because she had gotten drunk the night before and lost her false teeth:):)
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
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    One of my employees called out at 8 AM for her 2-9PM shift. It had just started snowing. She said "I can't get out of my driveway."
    Seriously. It JUST started snowing, you aren't in for SIX MORE HOURS, and you tell me THAT...NOW!??!?!?

    I told her she had 6 hours to figure it out or she no longer had a job. She came in. :grumble:
  • Panda_Jack
    Panda_Jack Posts: 829 Member
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    I once worked for a very large global hospitality chain and had a cocktail waitress's boyfriend called her in dead. HR wouldn't let me fire her when she tried to come back to work. And she was notorious for calling in... she is still employed there btw.
  • Nomomush
    Nomomush Posts: 582 Member
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    That's awesome! lol. :laugh:
  • KickassYas
    KickassYas Posts: 397 Member
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    What are your best excuses for not going to work??

    One of my favorites, that i have never used, "Rectal Glaucoma" def.--I can't see my a** coming to work today.

    bwaaahahahaha i used to work for an optometrist. i told him i had wandering eye. his response:

    "stop staring at the hot guys and come to work, yas."

    damnit.
  • UpToAnyCool
    UpToAnyCool Posts: 1,673
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    "Rectal Glaucoma"

    :laugh: :laugh: I read this 5 mins ago and am still laughing! THANKS!
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
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    sSig_rofl.gif
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    I once worked for a very large global hospitality chain and had a cocktail waitress's boyfriend called her in dead. HR wouldn't let me fire her when she tried to come back to work. And she was notorious for calling in... she is still employed there btw.

    Okay, so how did she explain that one??? :laugh:
  • koosdel
    koosdel Posts: 3,317 Member
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    I have called in because I was lost. It was my first time in Tampa! I was lost.
    I have also missed because I thought it was Sunday when it was really Monday. I had made a 30hr round trip and was really out of it.

    I have a part timer who calls in periodically because her 'anurism is flaring up".
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
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    I once called off* because I tried to lighten my already colored hair at home on a Sunday night, and 3" of my roots went Lucille Ball Red, while the rest stayed Joan Jett Black, and I needed an emergency dye job to cover my shame. :laugh:




    *Technically, I emailed off, since I worked in IT at the time, and sent a photo. My boss was cool about it.

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