My rant on sweaters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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SoldierDad
SoldierDad Posts: 1,602
in Chit-Chat
I am very tired of not having my own hand knitted sweater. My ex couldn't knit. I start liking this woman or that woman and then I find out she can not knit. I thought I had found my way around the problem last Christmas. I took my scout troop to sing carols at an old folks home and I spent almost 2 hours cozying up to an 80 year old woman. The result? She couldn't knit and neither could the granddaughter she wanted me to meet. I give up! I was holding out to marry the woman of my dreams. Someone sweet, pretty, funny, smart, and who adores kids. Not anymore. Whatever woman knits me a sweater is my future bride. I know, I know your saying just go buy a sweater! Or, its summer you don't need a sweater. What I don't need is that kind of logical thinking in my life!!!! I want my hand knitted sweater! :explode: :explode: :explode:
Thank you for listening.
Blessings,
Ed

ps: hehehehhehehehehee :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
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Replies

  • rfcollins33
    rfcollins33 Posts: 630
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    I am laughing so hard at this right now!
  • NicolCook
    NicolCook Posts: 489 Member
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    :laugh: Ha ha ha! Danggitt......I can't knit either :wink:
  • feliciapeters
    feliciapeters Posts: 525
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    I. Not anymore. Whatever woman knits me a sweater is my future bride. I

    try learning to knit your OWN sweaters
  • danyellelh
    danyellelh Posts: 10
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    lol :)
    i can knit-and that would be a lot of work! sweaters are complicated
  • Rubie81
    Rubie81 Posts: 720 Member
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    I've got one word for you, ETSY.
  • bigmamma3
    bigmamma3 Posts: 134
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    why don't you learn and make one yourself?
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
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    See, and I thought this was going to be about people who sweat excessively.

    Or maybe really hairy shirtless guys. :embarassed:
  • Heather75
    Heather75 Posts: 3,386 Member
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    They sell them in stores, you know...
  • SoldierDad
    SoldierDad Posts: 1,602
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    why don't you learn and make one yourself?

    Knitting your own sweater is like giving yourself a foot rub! :laugh:
  • SimplyDeLish
    SimplyDeLish Posts: 539
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    LMAO!!! You are waaaaaayyyy too funny!
  • BigBoneSista
    BigBoneSista Posts: 2,389 Member
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    I can't knit a sweater but I can crochet a really big square :indifferent: Oh darn...I'm married already :ohwell:

    *skips off to crochet my hubby a really big square* :bigsmile:
  • SoldierDad
    SoldierDad Posts: 1,602
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    They sell them in stores, you know...

    No way! I want one hand knitted! And hand knitted with love! hehehehee
  • nerdyandilikeit
    nerdyandilikeit Posts: 2,185 Member
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    I've got one word for you, ETSY.

    YES.
  • NicolCook
    NicolCook Posts: 489 Member
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    why don't you learn and make one yourself?

    Knitting your own sweater is like giving yourself a foot rub! :laugh:

    Love it!! :bigsmile:
  • NoPyForYou
    NoPyForYou Posts: 44 Member
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    As a knitter (married, sorry!!) I have to wonder if you know the amount of time and money it would take someone to knit you a nice sweater.

    Besides all of that, all knitters are taught NOT to knit for our boyfriends (especially sweaters!) because of the boyfriend curse. (In case you don't catch the sarcasm, the myth is that men see us taking the time to knit something as some weird commitment thing and run away!)

    Honestly, your best bet, L2K (learn.to.knit)!!
  • feliciapeters
    feliciapeters Posts: 525
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    go to the nearest retirement home. they are likely FULL of little old ladies who love to knit & have no one who appreciates them. Tell anyone who knits you one you will take them out for a nice lunch & pay for the yarn. You'll be swimming in sweaters in a week.
  • myukniewicz
    myukniewicz Posts: 906 Member
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    i cant knit either! :noway:
  • 1horsetown
    1horsetown Posts: 247 Member
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    So learn to knit!! All you really need to learn is two stitches and you can tackle most projects.

    I'm currently knitting a lace tablecloth. I'm using thread (smaller than kite string) and knitting needles slightly bigger around than toothpicks.

    Some of the top designers right now are men! And they are even STRAIGHT!

    Try it. 1Horsetown
  • DizzieLittleLifter
    DizzieLittleLifter Posts: 1,020 Member
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    Perhaps you should take up knitting :wink: LOL Yeah, like I could see that! :laugh:
  • SoldierDad
    SoldierDad Posts: 1,602
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    I think some missed this being a complet joke just to get everyone smiling in the middle of a work day. :flowerforyou:

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