Weddings and Receptions

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crystal10584
crystal10584 Posts: 334
in Chit-Chat
If you were invited to a wedding (knowing that the bride's parents passed away and the groom's parents weren't chipping in, so the whole event is paid for by the bride and groom) and it was a simple ceremony followed by cake, punch, and appetizers at 2pm (so not meal time)... would you find this tasteful or tacky?

Please keep in mind that I am in school full time as well as work full time and he works full time. Both my parents have passed away and his mom has made it very clear that the only thing they are obligated to pay for is the rehearsal dinner.
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Replies

  • KristenAnn711
    KristenAnn711 Posts: 783
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    Tasteful.

    They're doing the best they can, and want their family and friends to be there to support them as they start their journey.
  • jenhenning219
    jenhenning219 Posts: 385 Member
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    how much is your budget?
    i know when i got married we had the reception room for $350 for the day
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    Tasteful.

    The event is about celebrating your marriage, not about going bankrupt.

    Enjoy your day! :flowerforyou:
  • SaLandrum
    SaLandrum Posts: 141 Member
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    I think that Cake and Punch and music would be a great way to celebrate a Union of two people .... after all the day is for the Bride and Groom (not for me to get a free dinner).

    Dont worry about what other people expect or what society deems is the norm .... make it all about you and your new husband. Dance the night away with some punch and cupcakes!

    I would be honored to attend a reception this simple and fun.
  • crystal10584
    crystal10584 Posts: 334
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    how much is your budget?
    i know when i got married we had the reception room for $350 for the day

    1,500... it's not much, but it's really all we can afford...
  • chanstriste13
    chanstriste13 Posts: 3,277 Member
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    i think it's lovely. :flowerforyou: and i'm sorry about your parents. my dad passed away two and a half months before our wedding - total bummer.
  • 00trayn
    00trayn Posts: 1,849 Member
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    I don't see the need for crazy fancy weddings, once again TV has corrupted us. I'm expecting to have to pay for most of my wedding since my parents agreed to help pay for college already. I'm fine with that and I don't plan on a huge extravagant wedding. It's not about going broke to throw a crazy event, its about celebrating your marriage with your friends and family in a way that you enjoy. I don't know if I could enjoy a wedding where I know I'll be in debt for it for the next 5 years...
  • scarletleavy
    scarletleavy Posts: 841 Member
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    Tasteful, very tasteful. In fact, I find these overblown weddings and receptions to be so tacky. Don't feel pressured into doing something you don't want or can't afford. Have the wedding you guys want. It's a celebration of your marriage after all and it should be the way you want. A simple one actually sounds perfect to me!
  • Holton
    Holton Posts: 1,018
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    Totally tasteful....no one should be held to some social standard and judged by others because they are not going in debt to have a wedding reception. Shame on anyone who would judge a couple for hosting their own simple reception.
  • michelletyler38
    michelletyler38 Posts: 469 Member
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    I dn't think that's tacky at all!!! Do whatever makes you feel special on that day. =]
  • 00trayn
    00trayn Posts: 1,849 Member
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    Also, if you're crafty or into do-it-yourself kinds of things, there are TONS of tips out there for your own decorations, flower arrangements, food, party favors, etc that are cheap and easy to do yourself. Just do some google searching. You'll save a ton of money by not paying other people to do things you can do yourself (or recruit your friends/family to help make things!)
  • KZOsMommy
    KZOsMommy Posts: 854 Member
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    I think it is wonderful! It is about celebrating your wonderful new life together as man and wife. It is not about the food or anything else! I think that to many people feel that every party has to have big meals and unhealthy food all the time. Have a party (it is what you make it no matter how big or how small) and enjoy yourself!
  • godroxmysox
    godroxmysox Posts: 1,491 Member
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    It's sad that the groom's parents aren't willing to help you guys out =( I'd say do what you can with what you have. The people at your wedding know you and should understand. You're not obligated to serve anything, so your guests should be pleased =)
  • jenhenning219
    jenhenning219 Posts: 385 Member
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    have a backyard wedding or something so u dont have to worry about the reception fee, also sams club we got cupcakes for our wedding and they were 30 bucks for 150 cupcakes or something like thatt, and then we got 2 cakes for us one for our 1 yr and then the other for cutting those were 50 at the bakery near me so it wasnt to bad. u can get a dress at davids bridal for 99 dollar sale or you can check out salvation armys i know that sounds weird but ive seen some really nice dresses for weddings there, same as appitizers u can get them in bulk too would be the cheapest and decorations u can get at the dollar trees and oriental tradings is good too we got ours from both places
  • betterthanmama
    betterthanmama Posts: 57 Member
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    you should head over to project wedding :) a bunch of us girls from over there use MFP and vise versa. I think it all depends on your budget, the number of guests, location, dress etc. Having a small gathering can help a lot in the budget section. Also it depends on the type of people you are inviting - like if it's a lot of friends and students, I wouldn't worry too much.

    For my wedding 90% were family and parents friends so we had to make sure the wedding was up to par with what they expected from our parents. But if it was just friends, I would have done it in my back yard.

    http://www.projectwedding.com/topic/list
  • Kellee_76
    Kellee_76 Posts: 91
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    A cake and punch reception is perfectly respectable and perfectly lovely. My only advice would be to jJust make sure, on your invitations (or reception cards) to include, "Cake and punch reception Immediately following" or "Please join us at [address] for a cake and punch reception at [time]" or something like that so folks are not expecting lunch. 2pm is not always a dead give-away. Folks can be a little dense at times, God bless 'em.

    May your union be blessed forever! Best of luck and happiness to you both.
  • bettertracie
    bettertracie Posts: 196 Member
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    Meals at wedding are often overrated anyway, half your guests will say it was amazing, not eat it, and just eat the cake anyway!! And I think that those closest to you that you'd want at your wedding will more than understand your circumstancesand just be happy that they were invited to see you starting this new phase of your lives!!
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
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    The original tradition of the Bride's parents picking up the bill for the wedding, was different 40 years ago. It was along the lines of a dowry to the groom, because the woman was traditionally a burden that was being assumed from the family of the bride by the groom. (No Haters, please..Not agreeing, just reporting)

    Nowadays, I don't see an issue with the couple getting married taking on more financial responsibiliy for their own lives. Live within your means and throw a reception accordingly.
  • ceschwartz
    ceschwartz Posts: 240 Member
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    I had a very low budget for my wedding as well and had a simple early morning event too. What was funny is people didn't want to leave. It was so low key, relaxing and fun we had to "kick" our friend and family out. Take away the ice sculptures, sit-down dinners, and limo rides and you figure out what weddings are really about, love. Focus on the little things and traditions that make the day special.
  • crystal10584
    crystal10584 Posts: 334
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    The guest list is probably about 125-ish.

    I would do a backyard thing if someone had a large enough backyard, but then you're taking in the cost of chair rentals because people will want to sit.

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