You Cheated! I lost weight the "Natural way"

wonnder1

Everyone has the right to their own opinion. Good parents raise their kids to only use it when it's necessary.

It's not the way I choose to do it, and I don't think it's the natural way. But I don't judge you for doing it. If it's the way you chose, and you're fine with your decision, other peoples opinions just don't matter.

Tree72

I'm sorry to hear that you are surrounded by such rude and ignorant people. For my way of thinking, you chose the hard way to do it, so big congratulations on having the strength to make those decisions and stick with them. You've had to spend time educating yourself and getting to know your body in ways that someone who does it the "natural way" may never have to do. That's amazing dedication, which again shows your inner strength. We all have different journeys to take, and only you know which path leads in the right direction for you.

Best wishes for continued success.

LorinaLynn

If you cheated by getting medical help, then I'm cheating every day I put my contacts in my eyes instead of squinting.

Do what you have to do, and ignore the naysayers.

SommerJo

Congrats on the weight loss -- you've worked so hard to get where you are today and intelligent people will recognize that.

I've also used a "tool" to assist with my weigh loss -- it's called a treadmill. Does that mean my weight loss is "not natural" as well? Oh man -- I've used my computer too -- and my TV and my weights. Wow -- all man made -- scientific inventions. Not to mention the weights and the treadmill probably had to be designed with at least some input by medical professionals.

What should matter is that we all have taken a step towards getting healthier. Anyone who razzes you about the tools you use in YOUR journey -- is small minded and obviously has their own esteem issues if they feel it necessary to pull you down to their level. I say -- send them a wish that someday they feel better about themselves and let it go!!

and hugs doll

mzbrandyluv

I'm sorry to hear that people in your life (and on here) find the need to put their beliefs on you. It doesn't sound like you asked this coworker for advice, or if you should get the surgery or not. I can understand people's point of views on both sides of the discussion...but to try to tell someone that the way they are chosing to become healthy is wrong (since the doctor recommended it...obviously you would have to be conscerned if someone stopped eating all together to lose weight). Perhaps these people who find the need to push their thoughts on you are just frustrated in their own life and belittling you is the only way they can feel better about themselves.
95 pounds is AMAZING, leading a healthier lifestyle is AMAZING!

There are ALWAYS going to be people who have to complain, nit pick, judge etc. (OMG you ate COTTAGE CHEESE to lose weight??? That comes in a container...I'm doing it the "natural way" and wiping the dirt off of the carrots I pick out of the ground!) haha

jessie580

I have a couple people I know in my life that have said and still say "I lose the natural way"

and I think...oh yeah? and how many times have you done the natural way? how many times.
you're barely eating and you think this is natural?. REAL world people, you need to eat, your crash diet is going to crash you eventually and you're going to gain your weight back if you don't do it right.

I had bypass surgery over 12 years ago and kept off over 200 pounds.
Ive gained 50 or so back IN 12 YEARS! let me see all the rude people DO THAT.

anyway. people like us are not doctors, and their natural ways make me laugh.
so, whatever.

FearAnLoathing

People are *kitten*

_SusieQ_

I have considered the surgery at points in my life, but have just been too scared to "go under the knife". I think anyone who chooses this "tool" is brave, and by no means should be though of as taking a short cut. Weeks off from work/school/normal life while recovering, pain from surgery, DRASTIC changes to lifestyle...it may not be "natural" but it is definitely not taking an easy way out, IMO! And as Sommer said above, we all use tools of some kind, and this was your choice. Screw the rest of them.

Goal_Seeker_1988

You did what you had to do to get healthy! Don't worry bout what other ppl think. Your doctor recommended you get the surgery done and that's exactly what you did. You apparently needed it or he wouldn't have recommended it. You are prolly alot healthier now then what you've ever been before and you prolly are able to do the exercises now that you once couldn't do. When it comes to weightloss you gotta do it for yourself. Not for everyone else. They should be proud of you for making a healthier choice. And a very risky one at that matter. Either way you are now alot better off then what you were before and that's all that matters!

melzteach

One of my colleagues had surgery a couple of years ago and lost a bunch of weight but, from what I've seen she is not taking care of herself. She frequently comments that she missed breakfast and I know that she does not exercies. Every now and again when we're eating together I'll see foods that are extremely high in fat and sodium.
No matter how you are able to loose weight, if you don't address the issues that causes you to put on weight in the first place, you are most likely going to go right back where you started.
You should be proud of your accomplishment!

marci355

To each his/her own. But you did have "help" through surgery. My great aunt-in law person had the same thing and likes to tell everyone about how much she lost. But I've lost 124 lbs the "natural way" too. I do think there is a difference, but the fact of the matter is, you're making a change now and eating right and are in the correct mind set.

And that difference would be????? How about the chances of YOU gaining all your weight back are much, much higher than some one who has had the help of their doctor. Don't judge people. What do really know about these surgeries, besides saying you know a friend of a friend who has a aunt etc.....For a lot of pople, they have yoyo'd all of their life and this was a last resort. There is NO difference as to HOW one loses the weight. You are no better than anyone because you did it "the natural way" Come see me in 5 years.....we'll see who has maintained thier weight loss.

marci355

People are *kitten*

Yes they are.....and pretty darn quick to judge others.....

marci355

I have a couple people I know in my life that have said and still say "I lose the natural way"

and I think...oh yeah? and how many times have you done the natural way? how many times.
you're barely eating and you think this is natural?. REAL world people, you need to eat, your crash diet is going to crash you eventually and you're going to gain your weight back if you don't do it right.

I had bypass surgery over 12 years ago and kept off over 200 pounds.
Ive gained 50 or so back IN 12 YEARS! let me see all the rude people DO THAT.

anyway. people like us are not doctors, and their natural ways make me laugh.
so, whatever.

Amen, sister!!!!!

seemichellerun

Oh man, I get this ALL THE TIME.

Last year I had a tummy tuck to remove 4lbs of loose skin from my pregnancies. I also had my abs stitched back together since they were separated 2 inches. I didn't have any lipo and I still have stretch marks on my lower abdomen along with a lovely scar that goes from hip to hip. Since my surgery I've lost an additional 24lbs by going to the gym 5 days a week and increasing the amount of protein I eat.

When friends/family comment on how I look, they always focus on the surgery. "Wow, you look great! Makes me wish I could afford a tummy tuck!" or "I'd probably fit into a size 8 too if I had surgery." I accept that haters are gonna hate no matter what.

marci355

So what I'm getting from this is you would have had to do the same sacrifices if you hadn't had the surgery done...
Why do it then?
Mind boggling.

Because MANY people can lose weight, but they can't keep it off. Sure I've lost a ton of weight many times in my life. Did it ever stay gone? NO. The surgery gives you the chance to lose it, for good and keep it off.

ShaneT99

Based on everyone elses' remarks I'm guessing my comments will go over like those of a fiscal conservative in Obama's oval office, but the OP asked why some folks don't respect surgical weight loss so I want to give my perspective on the issue.

Admittedly, I tend to not give surgery weight loss the same pat on the back that I'd give non-surgery weight loss. I think the reason for that is because the few I know who talk about it tend to be very defensive and go on and on about all the dietary changes they've made as a result of the surgery. I think it's great that they've lost weight and that they've made (hopefully) lifestyle changes in diet and exercise after the surgery, but I always wonder why they didn't just make those changes in the first place. Would it not have accomplished the same weight loss?

I know a guy who readily admits that he had the surgery because he didn't have the will power to stop eating. I respect his honesty and applaud his weight loss (nearly 100 pounds to date). Most people aren't that honest about it though. Most people try to place the blame of their obesity elsewhere and act like they had absolutely no choice but to have the surgery, when the reality is they just didn't want to put the fork down. I make it a point to always try not to judge people, but when someone starts getting defensive about this issue right off the bat it makes me question their honesty with themselves and with others...and that's when I start giving less credit than is possibly due.

Just my perspective. No offense meant to anyone here.

drasr

Surgery is only recommended for those with a BMI>40 or the morbid obese. It comes at too high a price, i mean physiologically. But i don't have any problem if people want it.

callipygianchronicle

We can't control what other people say or do, we can only manage our own reaction to it. The fact that what your coworker said bothers you is merely a sign that you have some more work to do internally to feel strong and secure about your journey to weight loss. And it is your journey. No one else is on it but you. When you aren't carrying feeling of doubt, guilt, or self-loathing about your own journey, you will laugh in the face of anyone who tells you that you have it "easy." Best of luck to you in getting to that place.

natskedat

I'm mixed on the "natural way" vs. gastric bypass. I'm a PT and truly believe that making modifications in our lifestyle will yield changes before resorting to surgery. Obesity is mentally and physically debilitating, and I understand the desperation one must feel when opting for surgical intervention. I applaud the recognition for the need to get the weight off and to take control of your life.

That said, my experiences with people who opt for the surgery haven't been overly inspiring. I worked with a man who was a candidate for the lap band, yet compulsively over ate. He ate greasy, cheesy meat sandwiches, drank a lot, ate salads dripping in ranch dressing, and complained about his ever-increasing weight. He professed that the lap band was his "last resort." I furrowed my brow privately because he hadn't given much committment to any of the "resorts" that came ahead of surgery. This was before I was certified and had no legs to stand on in terms of advice.

In light of that experience, I've also watched people lose "the natural way" by eliminating food groups or practically eliminating whole groups of macronutrients. I've watched people use "natural" supplements to "boost" their metabolisms. I've seen people dehydrate themselves before weigh day so they can show some weight loss. I've also watched people on this site cheer themselves on for a starvation diet. None of these methods are healthy or "natural".

Of those two groups, I go with gastric bypass. I don't want this to sound awful, but the after-surgery maintenance legitimizes the effort for me. I can't fault anybody for not overcoming a lifetime of self-loathing, comfort eating, or lack of knowledge. Weight loss is really hard, and the power of our past is too overwhelming sometimes. Sometimes we can only do it when we're forced. I'm not an "any means necessary" kind of gal, but if surgical measures are what it takes to help you learn portion control, water consumption, and balanced nutrition, I'm in full support.

Great job. Keep doing what you're doing.

TexasNurseMom78

Ok, I have to chime in agian. Weight loss surgery does not make weight loss any easier. It just makes it possible. I still have to pay attention to what I eat, but my emotional need to eat has been dcreased greatly. i no longer want to eat when I am bored, sad, mad, happy or whatever other emotions cased me to binge before. And if I try to do so, I get ill. Physically ill. So I learned very quickly to channel these feelings into something more productive. But this is not an "easy" journey. I still struggle to make good food choices and I could easily sabatoge myself by eating crap all the time, but I dont want to. A big thing for me is mental. i know that I paid for this with my money, my insurance did not cover it, I know that I had a major surgery and I want to change my life. i am not willing to throw that all away for a quick food high. That said, I do still have treats occasionally. I hate when people say, You can eat that? or You are having desert? Yes, I am and I can, because I have [planned for it. and unlike you, I am only having a couple bites, not an entire pizza, or a giant slab of cake. So, why judge? We are all on the same journey to health, some have just taken a different route.

marci355

There is a well known statistic that the chances of someone losing say,a 100 lbs, and keeping it off, for LIFE, hovers right around 5%. Thats why I had the surgery. So I wouldn't gain it all back. I have yoyo'd my whole life. I'm not defensive about it. But you can bet ,we get really sick of hearing judgemental crap from people who don't know a thing about any of the bariatric surgeries. You would not believe the crap I have heard from people, over the last 7 years. To each his own. You worry about your journey and let me worry about mine.

nicakk01

I can see where some would say this, and I certainly mean no offense at all. I had seen 3 people have this surgery, then continue eating the way they were prior to the surgery. Which to me, is absolutly insane. Then my mom sat me down and told me she was going to have this surgery. I have seen my mom fight with her weight since I can remember. I told her, I support you mom, but the first time I see you sitting there eating McDonald's and other unhealthy food, we will have a problem, I hope you are doing it for the right reason's and that is to gain control of your life and be healthy and hopefully lose the pain from other aliments. We had a nice talk and it has been 8 years now since her surgery, she is still sticking to the healthy lifestyle and it is wonderful to have my mom be able to run after my son and just enjoy her life. I think if people do this choice for the right reason's and not the quick fix that alot seek, then it is a great option.

bcattoes

Cheated?? At what? Sounds like jealously or sour grapes. Good luck in your journey!

Sarahbear83

There is a well known statistic that the chances of someone losing say,a 100 lbs, and keeping it off, for LIFE, hovers right around 5%. Thats why I had the surgery. So I wouldn't gain it all back. I have yoyo'd my whole life. I'm not defensive about it. But you can bet ,we get really sick of hearing judgemental crap from people who don't know a thing about any of the bariatric surgeries. You would not believe the crap I have heard from people, over the last 7 years. To each his own. You worry about your journey and let me worry about mine.

There actually isn't very much information out there as far as long term statistics about having weight loss surgeries. People who have the surgery can stretch their stomach pouch back out and continue leading an unhealthy lifestyle, just as people who have not had the surgery can. The surgery can not necessarily fix the diet mentality, which as you have experienced, is about yo-yo-ing. People behave and reach their goal, then they figure they can just go back to eating and not exercising.

When you suggest that people who have lost weight 'the natural way' have a 95% rate of gaining back all of their weight, it's just as damaging as when people take a jab at your surgery. We're all trying to get healthier and lose weight. We should be building each other up and holding each other accountable for our healthy choices, not having a competition about whose way is more difficult. It's ALL difficult, or 1/3 of US citizens wouldn't be obese.

_SusieQ_

Based on everyone elses' remarks I'm guessing my comments will go over like those of a fiscal conservative in Obama's oval office, but the OP asked why some folks don't respect surgical weight loss so I want to give my perspective on the issue.

Admittedly, I tend to not give surgery weight loss the same pat on the back that I'd give non-surgery weight loss. I think the reason for that is because the few I know who talk about it tend to be very defensive and go on and on about all the dietary changes they've made as a result of the surgery. I think it's great that they've lost weight and that they've made (hopefully) lifestyle changes in diet and exercise after the surgery, but I always wonder why they didn't just make those changes in the first place. Would it not have accomplished the same weight loss?

I know a guy who readily admits that he had the surgery because he didn't have the will power to stop eating. I respect his honesty and applaud his weight loss (nearly 100 pounds to date). Most people aren't that honest about it though. Most people try to place the blame of their obesity elsewhere and act like they had absolutely no choice but to have the surgery, when the reality is they just didn't want to put the fork down. I make it a point to always try not to judge people, but when someone starts getting defensive about this issue right off the bat it makes me question their honesty with themselves and with others...and that's when I start giving less credit than is possibly due.

Just my perspective. No offense meant to anyone here.

I think that is a very fair and rational "other side" to the argument. I just wanted to tell you that.

Having said that, I wanted to address this part - "I always wonder why they didn't just make those changes in the first place. Would it not have accomplished the same weight loss?" I have not had the surgery, and nor will I, and that's just my personal choice. I do however support anyone who makes that choice as their own. The value add for ME should I chose to do it would be the consequences. I think so many make those changes AFTER surgery b/c they HAVE to. The consequences are dire if they don't - too much sugar causes severe cramping, illness, etc. My doctor actually prescribed Xenical for me once (now OTC known as Alli). Honestly, i was sooooooo afraid of the consequences (Um, hello ANAL LEAKAGE?!?!?) that I was DILIGENT as could be about what I ate. So I could see the surgery being sort of a "forced willpower" kind of thing. I'm not saying that's why everyone does it, but I could see that being one reason. That's why people take diet pills, go to a nutritionist, see a personal trainer, have surgery...we all have to decide what works for us on this journey.

marci355

There is a well known statistic that the chances of someone losing say,a 100 lbs, and keeping it off, for LIFE, hovers right around 5%. Thats why I had the surgery. So I wouldn't gain it all back. I have yoyo'd my whole life. I'm not defensive about it. But you can bet ,we get really sick of hearing judgemental crap from people who don't know a thing about any of the bariatric surgeries. You would not believe the crap I have heard from people, over the last 7 years. To each his own. You worry about your journey and let me worry about mine.

There actually isn't very much information out there as far as long term statistics about having weight loss surgeries. People who have the surgery can stretch their stomach pouch back out and continue leading an unhealthy lifestyle, just as people who have not had the surgery can. The surgery can not necessarily fix the diet mentality, which as you have experienced, is about yo-yo-ing. People behave and reach their goal, then they figure they can just go back to eating and not exercising.

When you suggest that people who have lost weight 'the natural way' have a 95% rate of gaining back all of their weight, it's just as damaging as when people take a jab at your surgery. We're all trying to get healthier and lose weight. We should be building each other up and holding each other accountable for our healthy choices, not having a competition about whose way is more difficult. It's ALL difficult, or 1/3 of US citizens wouldn't be obese.

Actually there is a lot of long term stats out there. Have you researched any of the surgeries? I have. Most people that have bariatric surgery of any type, maintain their loss. The doctors say even if you have a bit of "bounce back" weight, you are still a sucess if you maintain 60% of your loss.The Roux-n-y has been around for over 20 years. The duodenal switch is just about the same. They now have the gastric sleeve and of course the lap band. Out of all the surgeries the lap band has the lousiest stats. I'm assuming because there is no intestine bypassed.
I wasn't taking a "jab" at any one. Why is it ok for folks to start picking on weight loss surgery people? I was stating a statistic. Why do you think so many people gain their weight back? It's called "grehlin". It's what makes you hungry. It runs from your tummy to your brain, it controls your hunger. If you would do a little research you would find that in a RNY surgery, the doctor will cut that nerve that the grehlin runs thru. The result? You never feel that awful, growling, mad hunger again. At least for me. Trust me I asked my surgeon why I wasn't hungry the same afterwards, and thats what he said. He cut the nerve that carries the grehlin to my brain. So yes, it's a "tool" in my weight loss tool box and I'm glad it's there. I had the Roux-N-Y 7 years ago and it was the best decision of my life. So if you think I was "damaging" someone, I wasn't. Go tell this to all the idiots who make stupid ignorant remarks to weight loss surgery people.

realme56

So what I'm getting from this is you would have had to do the same sacrifices if you hadn't had the surgery done...
Why do it then?
Mind boggling.

Because MANY people can lose weight, but they can't keep it off. Sure I've lost a ton of weight many times in my life. Did it ever stay gone? NO. The surgery gives you the chance to lose it, for good and keep it off.

I have seen so many people who have had weight loss surgery and regained significant amounts of weight. It all goes back to learning better ways to eat and getting exercise. Surgery jump starts that process by forcing you to change habits. What I like about MFP is that it allows you to gradually change your eating habits and lose in a more moderate manner.

Surgery is a personal choice. I am glad that most of the doctors are doing extensive psychological testing pre-op because it is really important in helping folks choose and follow the lifestyle changes they need to make.

marci355

So what I'm getting from this is you would have had to do the same sacrifices if you hadn't had the surgery done...
Why do it then?
Mind boggling.

Because MANY people can lose weight, but they can't keep it off. Sure I've lost a ton of weight many times in my life. Did it ever stay gone? NO. The surgery gives you the chance to lose it, for good and keep it off.

I have seen so many people who have had weight loss surgery and regained significant amounts of weight. It all goes back to learning better ways to eat and getting exercise. Surgery jump starts that process by forcing you to change habits. What I like about MFP is that it allows you to gradually change your eating habits and lose in a more moderate manner.

Surgery is a personal choice. I am glad that most of the doctors are doing extensive psychological testing pre-op because it is really important in helping folks choose and follow the lifestyle changes they need to make.

Yes, I agree. It is a very personal choice. But I always get comments from people who know someone that 1. died on the table getting surgery 2. They gained a lot of weight back and so on and so on.......what people don't usually want to hear are all of the success stories. There are so many of us out there. And yes, I agree you have to pass a psyche evaluation. I too, have met a few that should have NEVER been cleared for surgery. But please, don't lump us all together, because you can be successful with these surgeries. Like we both agree, it'a personal choice.

Sarahbear83

Actually there is a lot of long term stats out there. Have you researched any of the surgeries? I have. Most people that have bariatric surgery of any type, maintain their loss. The doctors say even if you have a bit of "bounce back" weight, you are still a sucess if you maintain 60% of your loss.The Roux-n-y has been around for over 20 years. The duodenal switch is just about the same. They now have the gastric sleeve and of course the lap band. Out of all the surgeries the lap band has the lousiest stats. I'm assuming because there is no intestine bypassed.
I wasn't taking a "jab" at any one. Why is it ok for folks to start picking on weight loss surgery people? I was stating a statistic. Why do you think so many people gain their weight back? It's called "grehlin". It's what makes you hungry. It runs from your tummy to your brain, it controls your hunger. If you would do a little research you would find that in a RNY surgery, the doctor will cut that nerve that the grehlin runs thru. The result? You never feel that awful, growling, mad hunger again. At least for me. Trust me I asked my surgeon why I wasn't hungry the same afterwards, and thats what he said. He cut the nerve that carries the grehlin to my brain. So yes, it's a "tool" in my weight loss tool box and I'm glad it's there. I had the Roux-N-Y 7 years ago and it was the best decision of my life. So if you think I was "damaging" someone, I wasn't. Go tell this to all the idiots who make stupid ignorant remarks to weight loss surgery people.

Yes. I have, because I considered having surgery. I decided that the risk of death or severe side effects and the normal lifestyle of a post-surgery patient was not how I wanted to live my life.

I don't really see how someone losing 250 lbs from surgery and gaining back 100 of that (40%) is considered a 'success'. They've still got an enormous amount of weight to get rid of.

I did not say it was ok to pick on anyone, for any type of weight loss. In fact, I said that we were ALL trying our best and doing what we felt we needed to in order to be successful. But when your response to people who make ignorant remarks about people who have chosen bariatric surgery is to start listing statistics about how they're going to get fat again because they didn't have it, you're no better than they are. It's just as hurtful and de-motivating. Someone might read that and say 'why am I trying if I've got a 95% chance at failing at this weight loss thing?'

cahira

I have been big enough to qualify for the surgery - shoot I might still be. But I never considered it. Because I know that whether or not I succeed is up to me - and that when push comes to shove the surgery will not do the work for me.

I have three good friends who have had the surgery. The first lost over 200 pounds and has kept it off. But she eats mostly processed sugar free products (to prevent getting sick she says) and I wouldn't consider her healthy. The second lost about 100 lbs (she needed to lose at least 300) and when she lost a parent she lost control of her eating and gained it all back. Surgery doesn't fix your emotions. The third is a man that I knew. A week after surgery he collapsed in his home and died from complications.

I realize that overall the odds are better than that. But I still don't think it's worth it. I don't think it's cheating, but you have to do the work whether or not you have the surgery, and surgery won't do anything for your emotions - which are the reason I'm fat in the first place. And I don't think the benefits outweigh the risks.