I'm Embarrassed to Lose Weight

maysflower

I need to know if I am the only one who feels like this.

I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy, but I am embarrassed to tell people how much I have lost or that I'm even losing weight. I am so ashamed of how heavy I let myself get and I don't really want people to know that I've lost 61 lbs but have another 50 lbs to lose. It's embarrassing.

Does anyone else out there feel the same way I do?

sweebum

Kind of. But why tell them?

"Thanks for noticing my commitment to my health. I'm very proud of my accomplishments." Leave it at that

shalma

Totally. I don't talk numbers because I'm embarassed of the numbers.

jamie1888

You should be proud of the fact that you are getting yourself healthy!! :flowerforyou:
And you don't need to tell anyone a number at all! If someone asks you how much you lost, say, "I don't know; I'm not weighing myself. I just want to focus on being healthy"! Or something like that!

Kristhin

So just don't advertise it to everyone. Just do it on your own. Then when you get to the weight you want, you'll probably WANT to tell people about it at that point because you'll be proud of yourself. And if you still don't want ppl to know, whatev. Your life, right? Do what you want, the whole world doesn't have to know.

Jenscan

First off, congratulations on your weight loss thus far! You've done wonders! Why aren't you giving yourself credit for that?

I'm sure that your loss is very noticeable, and others are probably commenting, and asking you questions? I think maybe the best way to avoid the topic is to respond "I am making some changes, thank you for asking" and then change the subject. Rinse and repeat if the nosey butts keep asking!

I'm wondering if you might consider reframing your attitude towards yourself some here? Are you avoiding attention for some reason? Why are you embarrassed about the well-done hard work you have put in? Don't sell yourself short here. Think on the positive changes you have made.

But all in all, it is NOBODY's business but your own. And lean on us to help you as you continue your weight loss!

bunchesonothing

I can't speak to this specific issue, but I can tell you that we all have things we wish were different, things we are not happy with. Things that we've done to ourselves and others. Some are easy to see. Some are hidden. It's better to not dwell on our "failings" but focus on how we are turning them around and who we are now. And you've shown extraordinary strength and perserverance in turning your health around!

princesslmc2

I felt like this at the beginning... And certainly, if you don't feel comfortable telling people, then don't.

I had set out to lose 82 pounds... I'm down 44. My goal weight is 160, which means I started at 242. I feel horrible about that starting weight... but you know what, I'm not there anymore! I've made a conscious decision to change.

Once I hit the 20-pound mark, I was proud of the large numbers... and I kept getting prouder and prouder as I moved up to 25, 30, 35, 40 pounds. It's a BIG DEAL!!! For me personally, I found motivation in sharing my success with others. Others have since been motivated by Lil' Ole ME to start their own journeys. And now we all cheer one another on!

But everyone's mind works differently. If you still feel subconscious about it, then be descreet about what you share with others. :-)

beverlyl64

Be proud of what you have accomplished.

Truthfully, they already know that you are overweight and those that matter will encourage you and motivate you to be successful.

I'm embarrassed that I let myself go, but I am proud of the fact that I have lost 40+ pounds and I want people to know how hard I am working to lose the next 40. I also hope that I can motivate and encourage others that yes this is a hard journey but you can do it, if you are willing to take the time and put the work in to do it.

GGMarie1501

You both have accomplished alot. You have to be a hundred percent dedicated to this to be successful. Way to go!!

immacookie

It's a very personal, private and emotional journey... you don't have to share it with anyone you don't want to! :flowerforyou:

CJ118

Totally understand how you feel. I've lost 36lbs and have roughly 60 more to go and don't like telling people how much I want all together. Many congrats on your weight loss so far, and can't wait to see the before and after pics once you reach your final goal weight......

vim_n_vigor

I feel conflicted on the issue - I am pround and want to tell them about my hard work, but at the same time, very embarrassed about where I let myself go

newbeautifulme

I used to feel the same way so I did the very opposite and started a weight loss blog. It was very embarrassing for me to put how much I weighed, especially at the start before I had lost any weight. However, as the pounds came off it really became liberating. Also, I was able to help other people and I think people really appreciate me being open and honest about where I was. I currently weigh 241 lbs and I will tell anyone. 241 lbs is still 61 lbs overweight for me and some people would never admit they weighed it but I am proud of it! I have lost 69 lbs!

I would encourage you to celebrate the amazing success you have had. YOU ARE OVER HALF WAY THERE!!! You ARE an inspiration to everyone who can read your story!!

BIccan1959

maysflower - you should not be embarrassed for working on making yourself healthier. Be proud of how much you have already accomplished & continue to make yourself the person you want to be. As another person who is "ashamed of how heavy I let myself get" - I can't wait to shout it from the rooftops that I've lost 50 pounds or more. You've done an awesome job so far - so please, please, please - don't give up & don't be embarassed.

cklbrown

I understand completely. I am very uncomfortable when people comment on my weight. I have lost a lot, but I am still overweight and need to lose a lot more!

HeatherMarie1174

I totally understand where you are coming from ... I am the same way. You won't see my start weight on here or my goal weight ... actually not even clothes sizes for the same reason. Sad ... I know, but I can't help it.

I know I should be happy for getting healthy too, but I can't help it.

SunLove8

I need to know if I am the only one who feels like this.

I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy, but I am embarrassed to tell people how much I have lost or that I'm even losing weight. I am so ashamed of how heavy I let myself get and I don't really want people to know that I've lost 61 lbs but have another 50 lbs to lose. It's embarrassing.

Does anyone else out there feel the same way I do?

I read an article not to long ago and it stated that peole stick with losing weight and exercising better if they don't tell anyone. Remember, you are doing this for YOU and sometimes having people begin to notice by their own eyes after a little while that you are indeed becoming healthier, just may be really rewarding. People can also be jerks too and they don't even realize it by not complementing once in awhile or giving you crap for eating something that isn't considered healthy when they do know you're trying to lose weight and get healthy. JUST DO IT! :flowerforyou:

run_momma_run

Yup. I didn't tell my hubby my weight for months and months. But just Monday I let it out. Accountability, and all that jazz. It made me cry to say my weight out loud. Afterwards (much later), he said that he probably would have guessed it at that, so it's not like I was really fooling anyone.

But you don't have to go spewing numbers to just anyone. You can just say things like "yup, I've been working really hard and I'm not done yet", or "thanks, still working on it". People can see that you're doing great even if they don't know the numbers.

Geep goin' girl - you're AWESOME!!

igora_soma

Congrats on losing the weight and making and maintaining the commitment! If it is personal then don't feel like you have to share. I'm sure if you tell someone that you'd rather not discuss it they will drop the topic.

Keep going, you're doing great!

Aviendha_RJ

I wouldn't worry about it. Concentrate on how great you feel. When you feel good, & you look good, it comes across in your attitude. People gravitate toward happy, positive people. If you act like you feel bad, & you're embarrassed by how much weight you've lost, then other people will see it.

Be PROUD. Hold your head up high, and LOVE yourself. You've worked VERY hard to get where you are today, & you've proven to yourself that you can get to where you want to be. Hold THAT thought when people ask how much you've lost. Don't worry about how much you still want to lose, because that may change when muscle mass increases. Focus on what's GONE, not what's left.

You're doing AWESOME. You should be SO proud of what you've accomplished! 61lbs is AMAZING! Screw what anyone else thinks, because if they're not proud of you, they don't respect you for your hard work & dedication. :happy:

NanBar

That seems like an excuse to set yourself up for failure in case you dont meet your goal. Just look at what you have been done and be proud of it on the inside. You do not have to tell anyone anything...and I pretty much guarantee when you drop the other 40 pounds you will want to scream it from the rafters.

FruitLoop05317

I need to know if I am the only one who feels like this.

I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy, but I am embarrassed to tell people how much I have lost or that I'm even losing weight. I am so ashamed of how heavy I let myself get and I don't really want people to know that I've lost 61 lbs but have another 50 lbs to lose. It's embarrassing.

Does anyone else out there feel the same way I do?

at first i was embarassed to tell people, but slowly but surely the more i lost the less embarassed i was and this site has helped. i have lost 54 and a half pounds, and have 118.8 left to lose. i still dont like to tell some people my starting weight, like my boyfriend, or my skinny friends...but all the people i really trust know. as long as you have someone you can tell or even someone on here, you shouldnt have to come out and say what you weighed if you dont want to. my starting weight by the way, was 323.6. you can feel free to add me if you like.

gec1266

Never be ashamed of where you are going. Your past is just that and it is behind you. Now is the time for you to pick yourself up and push through. You know where you want to get to and you have the entire MFP family behind you. We will help you through whatever you are feeling and if you look on here...you are not alone. There are people who were in your position,are in your position,and wish they could be in your position. We all have doubts but with a large family...we will all make it!!!

em1823

I definitely understand. When I came to law school I weighed under 150 pounds and am not 25 pounds heavier and am completely embarrassed that I let myself go like that! All I want to do, at this point, is forget about the scale and worry about how my clothes fit and how I feel. When I look in the mirror, I want to feel amazing, not see the extra fat I have accumulated over the past two years.

You have accomplished so much! Just remember that each and every day! Congratulations!

eeeekie

I think people would be more intrigued that you lost 100lbs than the fact that you gained 100lbs to begin with. A lot of people will admire you for taking control of your life. I'm only 30lbs into my weight loss and I have tons of people saying they admire me and telling me how inspiring I am and how proud of me they are. You need to stop thinking about what they might be thinking (because your thoughts on what you might think they are thinking) is A LOT worse than what they are really thinking.

raaynes

I totally understand this. It's as if acknowledging the weight you've lost is admitting that you had weight to loose... that's my perception, anyways. I fully accept I have a few pounds to lose, but am admittedly embarrassed to admit this to anyone else... an awkward sort of public denial.

chridow

I can understand that feeling of embarrassment. The other suggestions to not talk numbers and give generic type responses are good ones. But I also beleive that part of the embarrassment is from the power the number on the scale has. Part of being able to get that power back is to talk about that number openly. Hopefully one day you'll be more comfortable. But remember that the number on the scale IS NOT who you are as a person! You were brave enough to see you needed to change something in your life and you're working hard to do it. Numbers don't convey that, YOU DO!

I personally was very ashamed of my weight and NEVER spoke about it. But as I've finally started to lose weight I've become more open about it because I don't want some stupid number to control how I feel about myself. I need that power to reach my goal!

I wish you much (continued) success in your weightloss :-D

MrsCB10

I feel embarrassed BEING at the gym. I feel so out of shape and out of place whenever I step foot in the gym. I'm sure no one is looking at me, but I'm so self concious it makes me feel all eyes are on the "new girl" (I feel "new" because I go MAYBE once a week - ugh). My husband wants me to go with him and I finally had to break down and explain to him that I feel stupid being there with him. He's so supportive and wonderful with me -- I wish I could go with him and be supportive of HIM without feeling soooo out of place.

sugarbeans

Congrats on the weight loss so far and your strive to become healthier. Most people don't mean for the weight to come on it just happens, usually there is a stressor, tragedy, unhappieness or some other trigger where we tend to turn to food to "fix" it or escape it.
Yes it can be embarrassing to have the excess weight but the important thing to remember is that you are becoming a healthier person and weight loss is just the benefit of that.

Look at this as how good you feel. Look back at where you were 61 lbs heavier and where you are now and look at the accomplishments that have transpired. Try to look at the 61lbs as a success, most people have a hard time losing 10 lbs and remember this journey is about you and only you.

Keep your chin up and again congrats to your success in figuring out a lifestyle that works for you.

rlelliott08

I totally feel the same way you do, I gave birth to my son back in 08' before I found out I was pregnant I weighed about 160. Which I wasn't happy with but I took it as it was, i wasn't huge. While I was pregnant, I developed pre-cylemsia which caused me to gain weight roughly 6 to 7 lbs a week. After having him with in 6 weeks i lost back down to around 165. They started me on the depo shot, when I had went back to my yearly exam, I weighed 195. I was totally embaresed. Birth Control was my worst nightmare.

I am currently at 208, and until I recently saw a photo of myself, I didn't realize how big I had become.

It is a long journey to get the weight off, but I realize to I didn't put it on overnight and it isn't gonna come off over night.

So yes you are not alone, I don't like for anyone to know my weight. But it is also our choose to tell or not to tell, But once I hit that goal, then that might be a different story. So if anyone asks just say I needed to get healthy for me and my child, and it is something I have been wanting to do.